Who do I contact regard Home Educated child to raise concerns?

[Bemumsed]

Hi,

Have umm and aaah over this for ages, but am really concerned about some children known to us who are being home educated.

They are simular ages to our children, yet do not appear to be making any progress educationally. I know one of the children who is similar age to my eldest child cannot read. Parents say it is because she is dyslexic, but I find that hard to believe as have people in my family/friends who are extremely dyslexic but they were able to read at this age, even if it was with some difficulties. Parent have done nothing to tackle the problem, citing lack of money to get child properly assessed.

Also parents don't appear to spend much time if any working with their children on their education.

Parents won't talk about it. I'm just very concerned for children in the family that their educational and social needs are not being met.

I know that legally parents are entitled to home educate, but is there any way that the education of these children can be looked into? I can't find any info on local council website that explain who I can contact even if they turn round and say there is nothing they can do about it. Would like to know that at least I've tried.

Maybe to you but I like asking questions to which I don't know the answer. It is how I learn!

Roseformeplease

If it's a genuine question, and not a snarky comment, then I apologise, I misinterpreted what you said. In answer to that question, there are HE'rs from all walks of life. Some are two-parent families who work full-time, some have one parent stay home while the other works. Some are single-parents, some are registered disabled, some are on benefits, some are self-employed.

Personally, we're a two-parent family and my OH is self-employed. We don't have a lot of money, but we're happy with out choice to HE.

I too have had enough of the home ed bashing on mumsnet. I did give it another chance or two, but enough is enough. Im going back to my exclusively home-edding boards and walking away from the hostile and accusatory attitudes here. I wanted to love mumsnet, I really did.

OP, I do hope you mind your own business, and leave this family alone. I suspect you won't, and can only hope you do not cause them, or their children too much pain, upset or disruption.

A further clarification: A lot of parents who HE adjust their life styles in order to HE. They often change to working different hours or patterns in order to be there for their children. What do parents do up to school age? Same question, if you want to be with your child you adjust your life to be with your child.

Further, people have different ideas of what constitutes necessary income and available spending money. I am aware of a lovely single mum who HEs her daughter. She is on a tiny income but grows all of their food, barters, reclaims things to use to manage her life, lives without much that others consider necessary in fact such as a car, holidays and luxury goods. She and her child live frugally but are very happy.

I have an almost 10 yr old who cant read can you report the school for me because I have tried & failed. my son is miserable at school because he cant read the instructions for the work he's given & noone will help him. Im thinking of HE'ing him from next week because I couldnt do any worse than school. If I had real concerns for another family I wouldnt be asking complete strangers for advice. if its an educational concern obviously you contact lea. if its child protection then obviously you contact the child protection team. but as the child protection team where I am was put under special measures & the lea are just a waste of space & dont know their ass from their elbow I wouldnt be holding my breath that anything would be done anyway

I don't see any HE bashing on here! Where does that all go on?

Also i don't think the op being concerned about this child is the same as HE bashing, they are too separate things. She seems genuinely concerned about the child. She might be wrong but that doesn't mean she shouldn't talk to someone about it. Just as anyone on here who mentions calling SS about a child might be wrong, but you should still do it just in case.

It doesn't mean that she has anything against HE and i can't help but feel that some people who are offended by it on here do so because of their own issues and paranoia that others are criticising their choice.

Time for a favourite mn phrase.........

Did you mean to be so rude poopooinmytoes?

PooPooInMyToes

"I don't see any HE bashing on here! Where does that all go on?"

It's the comments that followed the OP's post that are the problem.

"Also i don't think the op being concerned about this child is the same as HE bashing, they are too separate things. She seems genuinely concerned about the child. She might be wrong but that doesn't mean she shouldn't talk to someone about it. Just as anyone on here who mentions calling SS about a child might be wrong, but you should still do it just in case."

Yeah, I really wouldn't advise that, either. If you have a concern with a parent's ability to care for their child, you should contact the parent, not social services. I honestly don't think people are aware of what these agencies are capable of doing, often without justifiable cause. It's really not as simple as them coming out and leaving if there's no concern. Granted, in many cases that is what happens, but it's certainly not a risk I'd like to take with someone I considered to be my friend.

"It doesn't mean that she has anything against HE and i can't help but feel that some people who are offended by it on here do so because of their own issues and paranoia that others are criticising their choice."

Genuinely couldn't give a crap what people think about my choice to HE. If I did, I certainly wouldn't be talking about it online.

As someone who has home educated in the past and knows some HE families, I think you should only interfere if you think it is a case for Social Services because they are neglected but that their education is none of your business. Many HE families believe children should learn to read etc in their own time (I know of children who didn't start reading until they were 9), children should be allowed to be children for as long as possible and to start an education as early as children do in this country is ridiculous and unnecessary. This is their choice and nothing to do with you imho.

[HE] "does imply that a particular closeness is developed as a result of the continuous support provided by the parent in an educational respect. "

I can just hear certain MNers making the exact same claim about the decision to educate in elitist schools or Steiner or Montessori. Or any other parenting choice.

For myself, I was never talking about "all" HErs. OP is trying to assess an individual situation.

I quite loathe bringing in "authorities"; whoever said that honest talking to the parents first was the preferable option is right. Suspect OP thinks that would be unproductive, though (?)

"I can just hear certain MNers making the exact same claim about the decision to educate in elitist schools or Steiner or Montessori. Or any other parenting choice. "

How so? The closeness I was referring to can really only be achieved by educating one's own child. Elitist/Montessori/Steiner schools are still within the same bracket as state schooling, it's just a different approach and philosophy.

"I quite loathe bringing in "authorities"; whoever said that honest talking to the parents first was the preferable option is right. Suspect OP thinks that would be unproductive, though (?)"

I quite agree, but still maintain that the evidence put forward thus far is not enough to warrant interference.

Always go with your gut instinct. It is better to err on the side of caution if you have concerns about children.

And, if you choose to HE, does that count as "work" when dealing with the Benefits Agency? Again, interested, not being snarky.

Roseformeplease

No, it would only constitute as work if you were being paid.

Unless you have true concerns about the physical, mental or emotional well-being of the children (i.e. neglect - regularly looking unwashed, too thin and exceptionally hungry, withdrawn etc... or evidence of abuse) I would not jump the gun and call ss or education dept.

As others have said you have no idea how they are choosing to HE.

If you are ever in a situation where you can have a chat with the kids you could just casually ask them what they have been up to and if they open up to you that will give you an insight into their daily lives.

You could also casually mention to the parents that you have been hearing about autonomous HE and ask them if they know anything about it. If they are choosing that route then like others on this thread they may well talk to you about their choices.

Once you have tried that if you do still have concerns ask the parents how they are coping and offer help.

Contact Education dept as last resort. Obviously if other concerns i.e. neglect or abuse then contact ss.

Very sensible post Zhen.

So do single parent HEs run the risk of being made to go to work once their children are over a certain age?

Roseformeplease

Yes, they usually get around that by registering as self-employed, in my experience. That, or they take a part-time job and HE around it.

Thanks.

'10%+ of children leave school unable to read and write.'

This seems unlikely. That'd be 18 of our current year 11s, & I can only think of two who struggle at all. They probably couldn't write you a dissertation on Petrarchan sonnets, but they can certainly read at a functional level. I've taught them both.

& in 13 years' teaching, I can only think of the barest handful of students who left us with serious literacy issues. Crap grades, some of them, but not unable to read and write.

I appreciate that HE gets bashed! I just don't think anyone's interests are served by reciprocal school bashing.

The school I teach at is a successful comp., so it's quite possible that illiteracy in leavers is more common elsewhere, but I'd really like to see evidence for the 10% assertion.

Same here. We are very small school ( secondary) but I have been there 12+ years and have no memory of anyone leaving unable to read or write to the level of "functional" literacy. We are the only school for 50 miles so no chance of results being mixed up by being chosen over another school. Although, we are very small so not, probably, statistically significant.

There's complete illiteracy (ie unable to read and write at all) and functional illiteracy, ie being unable to adequately operate in society due to literacy problems. I think the reading age for functional literacy is 11.3 y isn't it? I also thought The Sun was pitched at 11.3 y.

I take it you're a teacher, Raven? I'd just like to stop here to say thank you. You're obviously doing a fantastic job to have such good outcomes for your students. You're a credit to your school.

Sadly, it's not often the case for many schools, but it's refreshing to hear such positive feedback. There is hope! Still, I'd like to see the day when no child leaves school unable to communicate completely in writing.

21% functional illiteracy in the UK according to Wikipedia.

Yes, about that for most tabloids I think - I do mean functional, not complete, illiteracy.

I've definitely never worked with a child who was completely illiterate, & functional illiteracy is a LOT lower than 10%! Maybe 1%.