STBXH moved to EU

[SuperAlley]

Hello,

i wonder if anyone had any advice. Husband earns 6-figures. I gave up my career to raise the kids so would hope for spousal maintenance in the country. Our house as equity of about 500-700k. Husband says he will leave it all to me. But I don’t get his 500k pension.

is there any chance of spousal maintence if he’s living in the EU?

thank you

Spousal maintainance is a thing of the past, you will be expected to get a job to support yourself, do you have kids?

Are your DC still young? You could go for a greater slice of the marital assets given the disparity of the future earning potential, but courts prefer a clean break so no spousal maintenance.

What is to stop you from working now?

Spousal maintenance is almost extinct. You’ll be expected to get a job now circumstances have changed.

Spousal maintenance in not likely, unless there are extenuating circumstances

Very unlikely.

She said she gave up her career to raise children!

@determinedtomakethiswork yes but they might be teens or adults now

There's little hope of spousal, full stop. Unless your ex is oligarch levels of wealth?

The kids are too old for child maintenance I guess, or you would have asked about that.

Do you know if his pension is really worth just £500k? Have you declared all financials? If he really is offering 50% but in the form of property it sounds reasonable. I would want to be sure he wasn't hiding accounts though. High earner and only £500k in a pension, no other savings, hmmmmm

In the second and third line, too. 🤦🏼‍♀️ why don’t some posters read beyond the title?

Much better to have a clean financial break than being reliant on him in the future. Focus on a greater split of marital assets now.

Careers can be picked up again

You negotiate a larger share of the equity to have a clean break but it can include a pension sharing order.

It depends on your specific circumstances, money spent on a solicitor with a good proven track record for people in your situation will be worth paying for.

Spousal maintenance for a year whilst you gain employment etc isn't unheard of.

She can't negotiate a larger amount than 100%

How old are your children?

And, don't do what he suggested... if equity is 500k then in a split you'll get 250k+ (dependent on many things) plus 50% of his pension. A far better deal.

Why are you always so attacking?

she didn't say she wouldn't work, but she's had time away from her career to raise their children, while he climbs the ladder. Now they're no longer a 'team' he should still be financially supporting his children AND her a bit while she starts to rebuild her career. Obviously.

but some champ who has children and moves to elsewhere in Europe away from them, probably isn't going to be the most supportive Ex & Dad.

@GoodChat pensions form part of marital assets.

No, you can't, but he's not offering 100% when he's locking her out if his pension (that she's enabled him getting)

Not overnight & not to the level she would have been at if she had continued to build her career & he'd taken the hit to be the SAHP.

If he is leaving you the house with all that equity, I think you have done quite well already. I would get him to sign that over now while he is feeling generous. You can always downsize and take the equity as your pension .

Why do you need spousal if you can go back to work?

JFC it's bloody obvious SHE has taken a hit to HER career whilst being a SAHM for THEIR children, whilst HE has been free to climb the career ladder.

she's not said she won't work, but she's not going to suddenly match his income, that she's enabled!

@SarahSmith2023 but that doesn't mean she can never work again? Obviously it might not be at the level she was at, but surely she could have stayed at work and got childcare? Her ex husband isn't responsible for all her decisions.

Make sure you also go for your share of the pension and any other financial assets! One of the reasons women end up worse off after a divorce than their husbands is that they are more willing to give up a claim on their husband's pension/savings/investments in exchange for the house because they ascribe more emotional value to the house, when really the financial assets will likely be worth far more in the long run thanks to the magic of compound interest! Your husband probably knows this which is why he's so willing to agree to it.

You've made a huge contribution to your marriage, even if it wasn't all financial - don't be afraid to claim what you are entitled to.

500-700k equity and still not happy. Unbelievable.