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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Original poster

Can I be made to sell?

121 replies

Checkmateready · 08/09/2022 08:27

My ex is asking me to sell our property which was bought as “tenants in common”. We have 3 children all way under the age of 18.
When we separated I was told by a solicitor that a sale couldn’t be enforced until the children are 18 and that any split in the equity would take into account the fact that we both jointly paid in for a number of years and I have solely taken over all payments since (mortgage, maintenance, buildings insurance).
He is telling me he’s been told different.

Does anyone have any experience or knowledge of this you can share before I have chance to speak to a solicitor?

I'm not in a position to buy him out, I can’t get a mortgage (on universal credit as I gave up my job whilst together to take on our childcare but am going back this month), rent is triple my mortgage payments so wouldn’t be affordable.

Thanks

OP posts:
KangarooKenny · 08/09/2022 08:28

Who told him different ? His mate down the pub or his solicitor ?

LadyGardenersQuestionTime · 08/09/2022 08:34

Are you divorced? What was in the divorce agreement? Or were you not married?

MissSmiley · 08/09/2022 08:39

You can get a mortgage that takes into account all your income, earned income, UC top up and child maintenance, you need a good broker

Fuuuuuckit · 08/09/2022 08:44

Ultimately, yes you can be made to sell.

Is this a recent split? Are you married? If divorcing this will be dealt with as part of thee financial proceedings.

Can you afford to live in the house (even if he has to stay on the mortgage)? ie to pay all the bills (including mortgage) on your own - including cms, salary and uc? And yes, you will be expected to find full time work.

If not then you will need to sell and split the equity fairly, as agreed in the divorce settlement.

You need your own legal advice. But yes, you can be made to sell the house.

Iliveonahill · 08/09/2022 08:45

You are both right. A judge will make sure that you both have the ability to house yourselves. If he has no equity for a deposit and can’t afford to rent, just like you, where do you suggest he lives?

how much equity is there?
could you downsize to release equity?
I remortgaged and now have a mortgage until I’m 70 with nationwide that takes into account family allowance and child mtnce. So it is possible to do.

Grout1989 · 08/09/2022 08:45

This reply has been deleted

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Iliveonahill · 08/09/2022 08:46

And my solicitor had no sympathy for me working part time. I was told I was expected to work full time once kids are in school. Fair enough to be honest.

Original poster
Checkmateready · 08/09/2022 08:48

Thanks for the replies. He’s telling me two solicitors have told him but from the research I’ve done online I’m fairly confident this isn’t the case!

We we’re never married.

I tried to get a mortgage at the time of our separation but couldn’t however will check this again once I’ve been in work.

He has offered to buy me out…great because there is no attachment to the home (and wouldn’t it be lovely to start in something new) but it still wouldn’t solve the problem that I wouldn’t be able to keep a roof over our kids.

He has suggested I look into shared ownership which I am but it’s a bit of a minefield to me.

OP posts:
Original poster
Checkmateready · 08/09/2022 08:55

Yes I can afford to stay in the house and have been paying for the last 5 years.

There is equity in the house but not enough to buy elsewhere. There would be the option to rent but this would soon dwindle and at that point I wouldn’t be able to afford rent (my mortgage payments are very low)

He currently lives with his partner so isn’t homeless.

OP posts:
Starlightstarbright1 · 08/09/2022 08:58

I would listen to your solicitor not ex

Original poster
Checkmateready · 08/09/2022 09:03

He would also have the option of returning to his dads or if needed could rent a room.

I wouldn’t be able to rent a room with 3 children. I could move back home but this would mean a move 90 miles away and with kids settled in school and me with a job lined up I am reluctant for this. It would also make it more difficult for the children to have access with their dad which at the moment is very stable. But the option is there.

OP posts:
Starlightstarbright1 · 08/09/2022 09:06

Reading your update.. not sure if you spoke to a solicitor or just online but woukd definitely speak to one again if you have..

Original poster
Checkmateready · 08/09/2022 09:09

Yes I went and spoke to a solicitor but will be speaking to one again. In the meantime I have tried to do a little online research to know my options.

OP posts:
Fuuuuuckit · 08/09/2022 09:17

If you were not married then there is no legal/moral protection. Your house was bought transactionally and now he wants his share. Which he can legally push for.

It's shit, I understand. I think you need to check with a great broker what is affordable, once you have a ft job.

Some lenders will include cms, uc, child benefit etc.

Fuuuuuckit · 08/09/2022 09:18

What is your research telling you, op?

hedgehoglurker · 08/09/2022 09:19

You need legal advice. Unfortunately as you weren't married, I suspect he is correct.

WeepingSomnambulist · 08/09/2022 09:23

From my experience, you're wrong. He can force a sale.
You weren't married so you lose that protection. The order you could

Original poster
Checkmateready · 08/09/2022 09:23

My research is telling me that a court is unlikely to enforce a sale when children are involved prior to them being 18 and the solicitor said no court in their right minds will make 3 children homeless. This may not be the case when it comes down to it so I just wondered if anyone had an experience of it.

OP posts:
WeepingSomnambulist · 08/09/2022 09:26

WeepingSomnambulist · 08/09/2022 09:23

From my experience, you're wrong. He can force a sale.
You weren't married so you lose that protection. The order you could

Posted too soon.

The order you could have got to be allowed to remain in the house until all goods turn 18 is actually rare. Courts prefer a clean break. It would be unusual for you to he awarded the joint home until the kids turn 18 and leaving him without his equity.

You weren't married so that wont come into it. This is a boyfriend and girlfriend splitting up and the girlfriend wanting to keep the home and his equity. He can force a sale so you'd best find a way to buy him out.

Original poster
Checkmateready · 08/09/2022 09:27

It is shit and I understand why he wants out and if there’s any way to do this I would love to cut the ties with him. My main priority is ensuring the kids have a home whereas this isn’t his problem.

OP posts:
LizzieSiddal · 08/09/2022 09:33

I suppose he knows you’ll just have to rent, all your money will go and he doesn’t give a damn. What a shit father he is.

Go and get advice from a mortgage broker, you don’t need to wait until you’ve started your job, the broker may be able to reassure you.

Narcheska · 08/09/2022 09:33

A friend of mine has just been in a very similar position. Not married, 2 children under 5 house owned as tenants in common. The result for her was ex was able to push the sale. In the end she was able to work out a way to buy him out so the house didn’t need to be sold but she was basically told the equity she would receive would be enough to contribute to rent on top of her job

if ex is able to buy you out the kids wouldn’t be seen as being made homeless because they can continue to live with there dad (not saying that’s what’s right just how it will be viewed)

Starlightstarbright1 · 08/09/2022 09:34

Also can i ask would he agree to a plan that give you 6 months to see if you can get a mortgage to buy him out?

Just checking are they his dc?

LizzieSiddal · 08/09/2022 09:34

Sutely if this went to a court, the mother would be awarded more money from the sale of the house as she needs a bigger house?

Original poster
Checkmateready · 08/09/2022 09:39

I don’t expect to keep the house and all the equity but I do expect to be able to house our children when he doesn’t want to!

Yes he could buy me out but it’s not his intention to have the children live there! (Yes all 3 are his children)

@Starlightstarbright1 thats a good idea, I can certainly suggest it. Thank you.

OP posts: