What's a fair split?

[callingtimethistime]

What would be a fair split for this unmarried couple?

13 year relationship. Two school age DC. Low income family, with no savings or pensions but one significant asset (house). It's a relatively amicable split, neither partner has treated the other badly.

Partner A:
Owns house outright (no mortgage). Came into relationship with a mortgage. Bought family home outright with equity from 1st property, 10 years ago.

Works a job on relatively low wage but earns more money than B. Pays all regular bills except one & majority of household expenses
Significant debts (all on manageable payment plans).

Partner B:
Works on own business. Business not doing well partly as Partner B can't put in enough time in due to disability / health concerns. As a result, earns significantly less than partner A, not enough to live on.

Consistently pays one bill, £200 a month. Usually puts most of rest money into family pot, but it's a relatively small amount.
No debt, no assets.

Both put approx same amount of time into childcare. Partner B does most of the housework.

Legally Partner B doesn't own anything. It's expected that Partner B will leave the family home, as it's owned by A. However neither partner A nor B think it's fair that Partner B leaves the relationship with nothing, no money at all. Partner B will need money for a rental deposit for example.

What would be fair to both A & B? )And the DC).

If they were married, how would it be split?

(I know the answer to these two questions might not be the same!)

WWYD? Thanks.

I guess selling the house and splitting the equity would be 'fair'. But that's totally up to Partner A. Whoever will be be RP puts in a CMS claim (if they can't agree between them on what child maintenance to pay). There's so many variables though, not enough info has been given.

There's no question of selling the house to split the equity. It's the DC's family home. If they sold it, neither partner would be able to buy two family homes, they'd all be stuffed. It's a very modest 3 bed semi on a council estate, not a large house.

Partner B will leave, and Partner A won't put in a CMS claim as partner B doesn't earn enough to make it worth it.

Partner A could possibly put a small mortage on the house to "buy out" Partner B. Or borrow the money.

*neither partner would be able to buy a family home" I mean.

Thanks for the reply BTW. This is a minefield, and fraught with emotion as I expect you can well imagine.

I think if Partner A has majority care of the DC then I guess the money given to B needs to minimal - enough for deposit and a few months rent up front?

Can B afford the rent anywhere big enough to accommodate the DC overnight? Presumably they would be entitled to UC towards housing rent and council tax?

Can you say where the DC will be living? Will it be 50-50?

Is B entitled to benefits moving forward?

Can B afford the rent anywhere big enough to accommodate the DC overnight? Presumably they would be entitled to UC towards housing rent and council tax?

Not without UC.
With UC? I'm not sure about entitlements and house size. Thanks, that's something to look up.

Currently Partner B doesn't claim any benefits, but will have to claim UC (assuming no change in fortunes business wise).

(We do claim Child Tax Credit as a family)

@Rainbowqueeen

Can you say where the DC will be living? Will it be 50-50?

Is B entitled to benefits moving forward?

That hasn't been discussed. It will depend a lot on where Partner B ends up. If close to the family home, with space for the DC, then (I assume) both partners would like it to be 50-50.

But if circumstances don't allow Partner B to afford a place nearby or with enough space for the DC to stay, then it could be tough to achieve.

This partner A / B stuff, instead of just saying with I am and which is DP, is hard to keep up!

But I really do want advice that's fair to both, so I hope you don't mind putting up with it for a bit.

Partner B should be entitled to benefits.

For partner B to claim UC For a house big enough to accommodate the DC I believe it will need to be 50:50 care. Each of you claim CB for own child each.

Sounds like funds to get B into a property deemed suitable to house the DC would be the way forward which could be a deposit and 6 months rent up front.

Partner A may still be eligible for help with only one income and one DC on CB?

How much is the house worth, how much are the debts and does A earn enough/ have a good enough credit rating to get a mortgage to provide B with a lump sum if that’s what they agree?

Your post is so vague that it’s difficult to advise.

Look at the entitled to website and run through a few scenarios seems like a good starting point tbh.

@Snookie00

How much is the house worth, how much are the debts and does A earn enough/ have a good enough credit rating to get a mortgage to provide B with a lump sum if that’s what they agree?

Your post is so vague that it’s difficult to advise.

Sorry! It was a balance between trying to be short enough to not put everyone off reading it and trying to give enough info.

House is worth about £200k. Debts are about £15k, on payment plans, being slowly paid off.

Credit rating is OK, but may not get a mortgage, you're right.

Sorry to drip feed but Partner A is due to inherit about £10k sometime in the next year (probate happening now but slowly as it's a complicated will).

@RandomMess

Look at the entitled to website and run through a few scenarios seems like a good starting point tbh.

Thanks I will, putting it on my to do list for tomorrow.

@RandomMess

For partner B to claim UC For a house big enough to accommodate the DC I believe it will need to be 50:50 care. Each of you claim CB for own child each.

Sounds like funds to get B into a property deemed suitable to house the DC would be the way forward which could be a deposit and 6 months rent up front.

That's useful thank you.

@RandomMess

Partner A may still be eligible for help with only one income and one DC on CB?

I'm not sure. Partner A has no housing costs, and does currently get CTC. But I'm not sure if Partner A is entitled to anything else. Will put both partners details and some scenarios into EntitledTo tomorrow.

Jesus Christ, the cheapest 3 bed place in this town is over £1k a month.

And the cheapest 2 bed is £850.

Housing is fucked in this country

Honestly? I'd invest in some relationship counselling or a way that you can continue to cohabit/rebuild. If no one has done wrong by the other then why would you go through this. It seems like B will suffer and if that impacts their ability to coparent then it is not a good situation. I can't see how it will end up in a better situation for the DC.

They will get help towards rental costs.

You will both get council tax single person reduction.

Owner of house could have DC sharing and rent out a room if desperate?

Actually you could sort out CB now and then start individual UC claims whilst living in the same house. As I think there is a 5 week delay?

I wonder if CAB an advise on all of this.

Some councils offer a help with rental deposit scheme.

If you were married eventually partner B would get some share of the joint new assets and even pensions would be taken into account.

@ketchupman

Honestly? I'd invest in some relationship counselling or a way that you can continue to cohabit/rebuild. If no one has done wrong by the other then why would you go through this. It seems like B will suffer and if that impacts their ability to coparent then it is not a good situation. I can't see how it will end up in a better situation for the DC.

Been there, did that, it didn't help.

We're good friends, underneath it all. But we are currently are unable to have a conversation about anything significant without arguing. We're making each other miserable and it affects the DC's home life. We are no fun to be around. I've slept on the sofa for a year. We haven't had sex in about 4 years? (I've lost count).

We are getting increasingly miserable. Friends who care about us both have asked if we've thought about splitting up as they can see how miserable we're making each other, I suspect they say the same to DP, although DP wouldn't tell me if they were.

I've spent years trying to make the relationship better, and have now entirely given up tbh.