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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Original poster

What has your ex done out of spite just to piss you off?

102 replies

joliejoleen · 05/05/2019 10:22

Mine has decided that he will be seeing each of his children separately - as in one DS this Friday and the other DS next Friday. This is to make sure that I NEVER have a moment to myself as my ex can't stand the idea of me being with someone else 🙄
Anyone else with a seeyounexttuesday ex?

OP posts:
Birdie6 · 05/05/2019 10:29

When we were splitting our belongings, I assumed ( stupidly ) that the things I'd inherited from my Dad ( things of sentimental value to me) would automatically be mine. He didn't say a word. Then when I went back to collect my stuff, he purposely witheld Dad's things as his own. When I complained he said "well you didn't write down that they were yours, so they are mine". 15 years later I still dream about breaking into his house and stealing my Dad's things back.

SimplyPut · 05/05/2019 10:31

What a pair of bastards!

Hoggytat · 05/05/2019 10:46

Mine renewed our joint breakdown cover after we split until we divorced. For four years he got cheaper breakdown cover because he added my name yet didn't tell me. I paid for my own.

We kept one joint bank account for one particular joint direct debit. Once that came to an end he took the remaining £100.

It's been 7 years since we split. He started by paying the % maintenance he should, then declared it was too much and reduced it by £200. Threatened to reduce it by more. I got a court order (thankful of that since he now lives abroad). He's increased the maintenance once in 5 years after a mutual friend gave him grief.

Tight sod.

Hoggytat · 05/05/2019 10:50

Oh while we were first split he used to wreck any new clothes/shoes my young DCs were wearing when he saw them. I saw communication between him and the OW (also married with kids at the time) laughing about it.

I still don't sent them with good clothes/shoes as there's always some missing or ripped when they return.

I don't miss being married to him!

OhioOhioOhio · 05/05/2019 10:50

You can just say no to the one child at a time arrangement. I understand there is no 'just' anything about divorcing a pig but I'm sure you see what I mean.

Mine has too many mean mistakes to mention.

Original poster
joliejoleen · 05/05/2019 11:45

I can't believe some of these 😳 will karma ever catch up with men like that? I hope she does.

I know I could say no to the one child at a time arrangement. But I can already see him going to my youngest one's nursery and picking him up before I get there 🙄 or coming to my house and making a scene.
I've honestly just had enough.

OP posts:
Tweennightmare · 05/05/2019 14:44

Only something minor as we are only at first base being separated but still living in the same house but yesterday I was expecting a parcel between 8-10 I usually do the park run at 9 so I asked my soon to be ex to stay in and not walk the dog until I got back when I would walk her instead. He refused as he said it was dog abuse to make her wait until 10 (we have a garden she can have a wee in while she is waiting for her walk) so I had to miss my park run as I couldn’t guarantee I wouldn’t miss my parcel (a Sky broadband router which he is now getting the benefit from).

Sagradafamiliar · 05/05/2019 15:01

Fucked up our children's heads. Along with telling them I'd killed their sibling (termination I had because of the abusive situation coupled with the fact he doesn't provide financially and I couldn't afford another).

I don't believe in karma I just thank god I'm not as vile a person as he is as it must be awful.

Natsku · 05/05/2019 15:12

He did a lot of things but the worse was to refuse consent for DD's psych care that she really needed.

He's dead now but he left a of debt that I have to sort out because DD is his sole inheritor so that was one was one last thing to piss me off (I do acknowledge I'm a horrible person for saying/thinking this)

FannyAnne64 · 05/05/2019 15:51

I had to list all the items I wanted from our home after I left and when finalising the divorce... How your supposed to remember all those special little items that you'd accrued through 28 years years of married life, personal shit that our family and friends bought and gave us? I walked away with hardly anything as my head was so fucked up that I was just glad to get away from the B in the end. It's been 5 years and I still get an occasional call from him... it's always from an unknown unlisted number and he just plays an Everly Brothers song down the line - Fucking weirdo... Hate that man soooo much, I still get the shakes and feel sick when I think about him!!!

lisamac28 · 05/05/2019 19:09

I was going to a very much looked forward to family party, a going away party for my sister moving to another country. It was the same weekend as exes weekend to have DC. He assured me all was well, no problem - he'd be picking them up as normal.

He rang 5 minutes before he was due to collect, 10 minutes before I was due to leave - DC all ready, coats on - me all dressed up, hair and make up done...to say he couldn't take them as his 'heating was broken'. Pure lies, he was seen out in the pub later on that night. I was gutted to miss my sisters leaving do, the whole family was there and I had no other babysitters at such short notice. He took great pleasure in doing that.

Whoknows11 · 05/05/2019 20:17

Make our children take their shoes off at my door step when he dropped them home, so he could take the shoes he'd bought them back to his.

He did the same with our son's football boots on the side of the pitch after a match!

When I asked where our youngest child was one day, he replied "with his family" which was the OW!

CF43 · 05/05/2019 20:23

Lisamac28, I would have taken the kids anyway, even if you stayed for 30 mins you would have got to say goodbye.

Mine is just a sick twisted bastard when money is concerned, today he said i had to justify my spending, if it was for my son on food that was one thing but anything else. So when he helped himself to our food at lunchtime that didn't matter. I hate him, i hate the situation we are in, i hate the games and lies and controlling verbally and can't wait to move, but we are stuck as he won't agree to any financial settlement.

lisamac28 · 05/05/2019 20:35

Lisamac28, I would have taken the kids anyway, even if you stayed for 30 mins you would have got to say goodbye

It was in a pub, no kids were allowed in this pub. I did get to say a proper goodbye to her later but it was the first time in years that all the family were in the same place at the same time, probably won't happen again for years.

7yo7yo · 05/05/2019 20:38

@lisamac28
The whole family still wouldn’t have been together cus the kids wouldn’t have been there though surely!

TotheletterofthelawTHELETTER · 05/05/2019 20:40

Left his job so he wouldn’t have to pay maintenance. He has no concept that his maintenance literally maintains dd’s lifestyle, he sees it as money he gives to me which I clearly blow on frivolities for myself.

He also used to cancel his contact weekend if he had the slightest inkling I might be going out.

GiveMeFood12 · 05/05/2019 20:42

When I moved into my home - pregnant with our dd - he bought me a washing machine. when I caught him cheating on me; and ended it; he demanded the washing machine back Hmm

That was the start of the ridiculous things he has done .....

lisamac28 · 05/05/2019 20:43

The whole family still wouldn’t have been together cus the kids wouldn’t have been there though surely!

For goodness sake! I don't think a night in a pub is the appropriate place for young kids, they were very young at the time. My sister obviously said her own goodbyes to them, not in the pub.

Motheroffeminists · 05/05/2019 21:01

Continued to breathe.

Mami16 · 05/05/2019 21:01

Joining for a rant!

We split while I was pregnant with our second who is now 4 months. Had a lovely message off his co worker to say good luck to me with him, she found out I was pregnant and told me what had been going on between them.

That was it he got chucked out and he saw our toddler DS regularly. Fast forward few months and he was demanding to sell so I agreed and we accepted an offer, I started moving out slowly before baby was born (ex had no idea) we moved back to my parents, had a DD and while ex was on paternity he seen the house was empty, pulled out of the house sale, moved in and refusing to sell.

Then took me to court for 50:50 custody (which he didn't get) but now he's constantly threatening to take me back to fight it again.

ItsInTheSpoon · 05/05/2019 21:31

Stalked me on here so I don’t feel able to post any details.... but has made my life hell for the past year since I said I want a divorce.... and is still doing it. Won’t feel free of his mental torture until younger DC is 18.... longing to get on with my life.

So sorry to read all the other cruel and pointless things done by spiteful exes Flowers

Fenellapitstop · 05/05/2019 22:42

Repeatedly makes allegations about me to my employers which are untrue. Would have a shit in my house every time he collected dd for contact, has cut off my eldest dd who he has known for 20 years, refused to help our ds while in hospital after surgery, phoned me at work demanding to speak to youngest dd, airs our dirty linen on social media, constantly changes contact arrangements and refuses to answer any questions or make arrangements until he is good and ready, normally leaving me in the shit

lisamac28 · 05/05/2019 23:15

Fenellapitstop

What a nightmare. Have the kids seen through him yet?

Sagradafamiliar · 05/05/2019 23:15

There are so many utter, utter bastards out there. A very large club it is. I wonder if they would all get along sharing such dogshit morals.

Fenellapitstop · 05/05/2019 23:34

Big two have littlest won't for some time yet

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