What don’t/won’t you miss?

[Misswontmissdontmiss]

Tomorrow my new life as a separated woman starts. Never in a million years did I think I’d be separating. One awful lapse of ethics/judgement on the part of STBXH finds me here.

It’s been a tough decision to move on and there’s plenty that I’ll miss. Ultimately I would not have been able to forgive him.

Therefore, I thought i’d start a thread to give some positivity to myself and other ladies in this position....

So let’s talk about what we won’t miss or, if already separated, what you don’t miss.

I won’t miss him putting things (hair, dead insects, bits of food) down the toilet and having the fright of my life when I go to use it.

I won’t miss feeling guilty about mid-week hobbies/drinks with friends (I always felt I was missing out on quality time with him).

I won’t miss his dreadful timekeeping.

I’ll add more if I think of more!

Another thing I won't miss when he goes is the fact that he takes forever to get ready for work - has a pee, then a shave, the comes back into the bedroom, then shower, back in the bedroom, then brushes his teeth and almost every time he comes back in the bedroom he sits on my feet!

The drinking
The inconsistency
The mood swings
Feeling like I’m asking him to babysit our children
The sex!
Him sneezing when he got in bed with me (maybe he was allergic to me 🤔)
The shift patterns
Wanting me to be thankful for him doing chores
Him arguing with the children
Smoking
Walking on eggshells
Feeling like my life was on hold
Never having any money

God the list could go on, if and it’s a huge massive if....I ever get with anyone again, I want to feel wanted, loved and adored and ultimately a partnership 😍

Bringmeaginandtonic and

No, they must be triplets! 😆

And never any doing any dishes or any other thing that required turning off sports/Eastenders or put his drink down and getting his arse of the sofa!

I have found a joy though!
Having the windows open when I sleep!
And eating crisps and drinking soda in bed at midnight because I can ...
Never have before, but now I can!

Oh! That was two! 😜🤪🤪😆

Ladies in general
Thank you for openness and honesty. Nearly all the things each of you have listed I have endured.....and I thought I was the only one.
I have been struggling to look forward as I would want to be loved not the one doing the loving.
Itsallchange: you have described my ‘wants’ perfectly!

I wish you all peace and happiness. Thank you

I need this thread today.

Him shouting at the children.
His offensive comments about women.
His "aren't I a great bloke" routine with everyone outside our house.
Coming home knowing he'll be in a foul mood.
Looking forward to the weekend then him being an arse so I'm miserable by 10am on Saturday.
Him slapping the side of his face or punching a wall when stressed at his bank account.
Sitting on the sofa, knowing he is texting another woman as he had turned and put his knee up so I can't see what he's doing.

The upsetting thing is that he did none of these things until about 5 years ago. I miss the old him. Not the shit he became before he left me for another woman.

Oh this could make a whole page but I shall keep it brief.

His addiction to the internet and I mean sitting on it for upto 18h a day on the same shite.
Refusing to get a job and watch me juggle fulltime work/house/kids and be a single parent as he did fuck all apart from make them dinner.
Never took part in family events or helped organize a birthday/christmas/anything important.
The LIES that he has anxiety and a fear of public and people (to not get a job) but could easily go to his friends who had randoms in his flat to pass joints for hours.

Coming into my home to smoke joints for hours, as hed bring hash back, even though I asked one million times not to and if he didnt have that he would drink and then throw up, usually all over the dishes.

Sniping/gaslighting/shouting.

Just being a lazy, dirty lump.

Bringing myself and 2 children down.

No wonder I had a nervous breakdown a few years ago honestly. That is only the start the list could go on for hours. :(

Oh and stealing his childs money, more than once.

I’m nearly at the end of my divorce procedure and I’m having huge doubts weather I’ve really done the right thing in leaving him. The best thing he was good at was finance, and I’m frightened of not having that security. But things I won’t miss about him are

Inability to doing anything whatsoever around the house
Loud eating
Bedtime incompatibility
His healthy food obsession
His body odour
Staying in hotel room the whole time we are on holiday
His slowness
His moods
Being a mouse not a man
Not letting me have a life

I know I can’t live with him anymore, so I know I’ve done the right thing leaving him.

@Itsnotme123 don’t worry 🤗 you can learn about the finances, just get on top of things and keep on knowing where you are xx