Anyone know why this board seems so bloody basic?

[EricL]

I guess it is something that has been bothering me for a while but i have never asked. Why is it so behind the times guys?

I don't want it to turn into an 'all-singing-and-dancing' flashy ad-filled nightmare like some others - but surely they can up-date it a little so we don't have to type stuff like smileys in and other basic things that are too numerous to mention?

I know there is some discussion topics occasionally about the changes that people would like to make to it - but i am confused as to why it actually hasn't been updated to move with the times before now.

There doesn't seeem to be any presence of staff/moderators either - apart from deleted posts. (Not that it is sophisticated enough to show who they are anyway....) It just seems very strange to me as i work for other websites that are not the fanciest out there - but are technically miles ahead of this.

Finance?

I know - my thoughts when i saw those tickers were i bet there is one that shows everyone whereabouts you are on your monthly cycle or some other far too personal information.

Maybe i should design one that shows how close i am to necking my first drink of the day......................

I like it the way it is- I like being able to click on 'active convos' and seeing exactly what is being talked about.

I dont like tickers and i dont like avatars of what people wished they looked like.

barferooni tickers here

One assumes that in the first the crocodile eats the child at the end of the ticker.

NB, the barfness isn't linked to bf toddlers btw. The second ticker on the page is the one that made me want to throw!

pmsl that 93% of those netmums posters own a cat LL!

They changed it once you know, EricL, and we all got headaches so they changed it back.

I like it because of everything you listed, Eric!

I don't understand why the objectioners think it either has to be sensory gimmivky overload or nothing.

I mean, there would still be someone everseeing the board. There wouldn't have to be everything.

It's sort of differentiation by being crap.

I can deal with that. Very British, I like it.

You wouldn't stand for it in the classroom though

Christ, Littlelapin - if you scroll down on your link, hasn't Jane got hairy arms

Jane also has a demonic bat that she thinks is a pussy.

Thr difficulty is that if we let in, say , tickers, some people go OTT on the damn things.

If I'm honest, I don't like any of them. But you end up with people having 3-4 of the bloody things, listing everything from how long they have been in lurve to how long till their next shagfest.

And once you've seen them once, they just irritate.

I don't mind the moving smilies so much, but they also get overdone.

And while embedding pictures could be funny, I also think we risk overkill. At least with the profile picture option we can ignore them if we prefer.

Could this be a place for another box? With snazzy stuff[ ] Without garish twaddle [ ]

I can't wade through all that sh*ite on netmums just to work out what stupid people are saying.

I speak my truth.

I can't BELIEVE that that woman WASHED HER CAT. That's some deathwish.

Dear Cat Owner,

Following are instructions on the best way to bathe your cat:

1. Thoroughly clean the toilet.

2. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water, and have both lids lifted.

3. Obtain the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.

4. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids (you may need to stand on the lid so that he cannot escape). CAUTION: Don't get any part of your body too close to the edge, as his paws will be reaching out to grab anything they can find. The cat will self-agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from your toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.

5. Flush the toilet 3 or 4 times. This provides a "powerwash and rinse" which I have found to be quite effective.

6. Have someone open the door to the outside and ensure that there are no people between the toilet and the outside door.

7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.

8. The now-clean cat will rocket out of the toilet and run outside where he will dry himself.

Sincerely,

The DOG

LOL

Or, alternatively:

1. Know that although the kitty cat has the advantage of quickness and lack of concern for human life, you have the advantage of strength.

2. Know that a cat has claws and will not hesitate to remove all the skin from your body. Your advantage here is that you are smart and know how to dress to protect yourself. We recommend canvas overalls tucked into high-top construction boots, a pair of steel-mesh gloves, an army helmet, a hockey face-mask, and a long-sleeved flak jacket.

3. Use the element of surprise. Pick up your cat nonchalantly, as if to simply carry him to his supper dish. (Cats will not usually notice your strange attire. They have little or no interest in fashion as a rule.)

4. Once you are inside the bathroom, speed is essential to survival. In a single liquid motion, shut the bathroom door, step into the tub enclosure, slide the glass door shut, dip the cat in the water and squirt him with shampoo. You have now begun one of the wildest 45 seconds of your life.

5. Cats have no handles. Add the fact that he now has soapy fur, and the problem is radically compounded. Do not expect to hold on to him for more than two or three seconds at a time. When you have him, however, you must remember to give him another squirt of shampoo and rub like crazy. He'll then spring free and fall back into the water, thereby rinsing himself off. (The national record for cats is three latherings, so don't expect too much.)

6. Next, the cat must be dried. Novice cat bathers always assume this part will be the most difficult, for humans generally are worn out at this point and the cat is just getting really determined. In fact, the drying is simple compared with what you have just been through. That's because by now the cat is semi-permanently affixed to your right leg.

7. You simply pop the drain plug with your foot, reach for your towel and wait. (Occasionally, however, the cat will end up clinging to the top of your army helmet. If this happens, the best thing you can do is to shake him loose and to encourage him toward your leg.) After all the water is drained from the tub, it is a simple matter to just reach down and dry the cat.

In a few days the cat will relax enough to be removed from your leg. He will usually have nothing to say for about three weeks and will spend a lot of time sitting with his back to you. He might even become psychoceramic and develop the fixed stare of a plaster figurine.

You will be tempted to assume he is angry. This isn't usually the case. As a rule he is simply plotting ways to get through your defenses and injure you for life the next time you decide to give him a bath. But at least now he smells a lot better.

LL - are there actually tickers on that cat thread? - because I can't see them. In fact I can't find any tickers on NM except the examples on the 'how to' page - I wanted to show DH what a ticker was & couldn't find any. So am I just not looking in the right place or is my pc blocking them somehow?

There is beauty in simplicity. The board is fine as it is, it is the discussion that is the key.

beauty in this site?

Could put up an avatar of your beautiful self, lapin, to brighten th esite?

Oh no. You can't

Oh, yes I saw those

Damn, I thought my latest ZoneAlarm download must have included a ticker-zapper...

btw wabbit - have you ever tried setting your google language to Elmer Fudd?