Dread going home to moany shouting wife?

[GotABitTricky]

Walk in the door to verbal abuse. Told by wife to get out, so as too tired to argue, turned and went back out house.

I will return home in an hour after going to supermarket, and I feel sorry for kids having to put up with her moods and lazy mess.

Anyone else have to put up with this?
I would divorce if we could afford 2 small houses but can't.

If your wife is having more off days than ok/non stressful days then it has to be addressed. EASIER said than done.
If OP leaves, the kids left behind still gonna suffer. More so perhaps.

Defo seems "a bit tricky"
but a lot of good posters on this thread with advice.

feel sorry for the kids long term development - they will remember all these events for a long time - im sure that your eldest would just be worried about being left with their mother.
as someone with a similar mum, my advice is to leave now - your thread is from a year ago - cant imagine how much you all have to deal with xx

This is an awful situation. Has anything happened since? I am really hoping you have managed to escape.

Hey OP firstly big hug, terrible situation. I agree with pp. I am a woman and if this was in the other thread it would be ltb. Make plans to leave please for you and the kids. I am 44 and I still feel horrible when I think about the screaming and shouting that went on when I was around 10. Good luck! X

My ex wife was like this most of our marriage. Things definitely got worse after kids. She would get into ridiculous arguments over the smallest of things. Would shout at me, scream, through things at me and hit me. She had a massive temper. She never hurt the kids but I was concerned sometimes over the way she would fly off the handle at my little girl over little things. It's horrible epically if you love someone like I loved her. I tried to work out why. She would never seek and help and you cant help those who don't want to be helped.

Away in the end it sorted it she out in away. She had an affair with her step cousin. ironic because she used to falsely accuse me of it all the time. Used to give me such a hard time by making crazy accusations about me with strangers, female friends, work colleagues. In fact ever female I came in contact with really. She moved in with him (100 miles away) to leave me raising a 6 month old baby and a 4 year old girl. The house is a lot happier now with her gone and me and the kids are doing great. But she did break my heart. I know it sounds stupid but despite everything I loved her to the moon and back. The saddest day for me was when I realised I could never let her come back. I felt like I failed her. As sad as it is her leaving has been the best for me and the kids. I get on with her ok now we are not together and her attitude towards me is really positive. I thing she feels really guilty. Sadly for her she is alone now (it didn't work out) with not many good prospects. I hope she sorts her life out and finds happiness but hope she doesn't mess up another mans heart.

Never mind two houses. Get out meet someone nice and be happy.

How are things with you now Gotabittricky? Hope you're all in a happier position.

She's obviously not happy, you are obviously not happy. This is no way at all to live. It sounds absolutely dismal, and I agree with everyone who has said you need to split up and it sounds as though you should aim for custody of the children.

Sorry to hear your situation - You say she rants a lot, but what is she ranting about??

I wonder what happened to GotABitTricky? I can imagine how he felt. He seems like he had a good heart but was being crushed by verbal abuse. Some kind and sensible comments on here compared to some other sites you might see.

I have been through verbal abuse myself. It lasted for 16 years of a 20 year relationship. I will put up a post about this in a new thread. I don't want to detract from this poor fellas experience.

I would just like to say if someone hasn't experienced it in its true form, believe me it's painful. I think by the nature of it, the victim will generally be an easy going, caring person. Once you realize you're being abused you can either jump ship or start working out why your abuser is doing this. If you have kids it's 10 times harder. The more you pander to the abuser, the more delusional they get.

Some people suggest getting help for the abuser. If they can't see for themselves what they are doing it's pointless. There is absolutely no excuse to scream and shout at your partner or children.

If this guy stayed with his partner I reckon his brain will be fried by now. I left on 3 occasions and went back. Nothing changed. I still loved my partner when I left for the final time 6 months ago. It's sick really. I was having deep thoughts and so will he the longer he stays. There may be the exception to the rule but in general I doubt this will ever change.

I really hope this guy is in a good place and wish him well.

I've just read the thread and I'm appalled in the attitudes of some of the posters, this is an adult and children suffering at the hands of an abuser.

I'm really rooting and hoping that they made the escape and life has improved immeasurably for them all.

Just read this, I really hope you're out of there now OP.

We're all rooting for you and the kids OP.
Would love to know that you're ok.

OMG. I just read this entire thread (which is a few years old now). I really wonder how OP is doing by now.... It so reminds me of my own situation, it's uncanny. Except my wife knows how to cook and doesn't simply press the microwave button every day. But the verbal abuse, the shouting, the swearing, the name calling, the throwing kids stuff into the garden (or into the bin), I've had it all. Same as OP. Spooky.

BTW I found some of the advice really useful and relevant, both for OP and in fact for myself. I just wish I had come here and found this thread before.

What happened, OP?

Any news?

Run. And take the children with you. You sound like a sane person. What disaster are you waiting for to galvanize you to action? Good luck.

Sad that OP hasn't been back, but lets hope no news is good news.

I often wonder how things turned out.

Jesus😳😳🤦🏻‍♀️ anyone know how this turned out? Hopefully for the better.

My mother has been like this since I was an adolescent (maybe earlier). I'm nearly 40 and she hasn't changed!

Also, it's never my mother's fault. Always somebody else's fault for winding her up.