How does it feel tone in here?

[kickassangel]

I'm just pooling around on my iPad, wasting time, when I realized that Dadsnet is in the club section of mn and wondered how people felt about that?

Would it be more relevant to be in the parenting section, or does there even need to be a separate section?

Just curious, really, but it sort of feels like being a Dad is some kind of hobby group you might sign up to on a Thursday evening, when I suspect that really it's part of everyday life.

Is that also the answer to my question Helen? Think it don't post it, even if asked?

I heard there was an underpants party!

lol.

I think at this point in the party CY the lights are all on, the police are here telling us which tunes we're allowed to play.

I do kind of understand what you mean Helen..but raking over things tends to be human, rather than goading etc. And the hoohah that cracked off will always spring back to life, purely because it's unmentionable.

I do get that people have been upset, but to you go with the small minority and ban all mention for their sakes? Freedom of speech and all that.

Anyway, I haven't been talking about she who must not be named for a good while, so I'll continue along that road..

Lol cheerful

HelenMumsnet:

Just saw this of yours:

...it was a hugely upsetting period for many Mumsnetters...

Principally those who felt like they were being bullied out of certain boards.

Yet by deleting messages that are broadly in support of those people, you're like the school Head or Governors saying "Nope, there's no bullying here. Move along; nothing to see here..."

If there's still a problem, then you need to address the problem itself, not put sticking plasters over remote places like Dadsnet.

but to you go with the small minority and ban all mention for their sakes?

Here here.

Treat the cause not the symptoms.

I think that not being allowed to discuss things that have happened may lead to people discussing it off MN and then it gets to be a big "thing" that isn't strictly necessary.

@UnimaginitiveDadThemedUsername

HelenMumsnet:

Just saw this of yours:

...it was a hugely upsetting period for many Mumsnetters...

Principally those who felt like they were being bullied out of certain boards.

Yet by deleting messages that are broadly in support of those people, you're like the school Head or Governors saying "Nope, there's no bullying here. Move along; nothing to see here..."

If there's still a problem, then you need to address the problem itself, not put sticking plasters over remote places like Dadsnet.

But we did address the problem, UnimaginativeDad. At length on a gazillion Site Stuff threads.

The problem is, as far as we're aware, resolved. We certainly haven't had any reports to the contrary.

Therefore, repeatedly posting about it does look like an attempt to open old wounds and start another bunfight.

Jesus, Pussy Riot have just been jailed for two years. Russia is one f*cked up country.

@SigmundFraude

I do kind of understand what you mean Helen..but raking over things tends to be human, rather than goading etc. And the hoohah that cracked off will always spring back to life, purely because it's unmentionable.

I do get that people have been upset, but to you go with the small minority and ban all mention for their sakes? Freedom of speech and all that.

Anyway, I haven't been talking about she who must not be named for a good while, so I'll continue along that road..

It's not unmentionable, SigmundFraude. We're not trying to airbrush MN history.

But it is not on to post about it in a way that is accusatory or goading.

Just read first page and then this one.

Let me guess. Something to do with the feminists?

Therefore, repeatedly posting about it does look like an attempt to open old wounds and start another bunfight.

What a few brief and broad comments in an obscure part on MN buried amongst a whole bunch of general chit chat is an attempt to start a bunfight ? What with ourselves ?

It's ridiculous.

Oh no Rhubarb mostly something to do with cooking.

@NewStartSameStory

Thing is that is does change the fact that the whole section of feminism can still be an incredibly intimidating area. It was before and it was after. Are you saying we are no longer allowed to voice this opinion?

It's fine to voice that opinion, NewStart. It's not fine to attribute the reason for that opinion to one Mumsnetter or one clearly defined group of Mumsnetters (both of these would be personal attacks).

@MrGin

Therefore, repeatedly posting about it does look like an attempt to open old wounds and start another bunfight.

What a few brief and broad comments in an obscure part on MN buried amongst a whole bunch of general chit chat is an attempt to start a bunfight ? What with ourselves ?

It's ridiculous.

It doesn't matter where it's posted, MrGin. Our rules apply across all the boards, however great or small the traffic.

Thank you for the clarification.

I generally find it's not the group that is the problem, it's one or two very loud and determined posters behind whose aggressive posting style, other more sensible voices get lost.

I've had plenty of dealings with the feminist board myself. Sometimes I've agreed and sometimes not. What I've learnt is that most are highly educated, thoughtful and reasonable posters who view with disdain the more arrogant posters as they are well aware that this gives them a bad name. In fact I've had many PMs apologising on behalf of these aggressive posters who do their best to shout down every voice but theirs.

It's like when people outside of Mumsnet call us a "viper's nest" or accuse us of bitching and backbiting. Inside Mumsnet we know it's not like that at all, there are moments of gobsmackingly brilliant kindness, moments of raw compassion and moments of heartbreak. But what sticks in people's minds? Bunfights.

So I do try to be careful now when I generalise by talking about a group because I am well aware that the group is made up of individuals, many of whom do not fit the generalisation at all. The best way to deal with those loud-mouth posters who love the sound of their own voice (or the rant of their posts) is to merely ignore them and address the points made by the more articulate posters who often have their very valid points lost in the whole bunfight mist.

mmmmmmmmmmmm buns, stickier the better :)

It kind of is unmentionable, because everytime it's mentioned someone (MNHQ or some self appointed 'hoohaa mentioning poster quasher') either deletes the post or tells them it is unmentionable and they must stop mentioning it.

I'm leaving this here anyway, I have 2 tiny DS's, high on Rainbow Drops, playing knights with predictable results!!!

Willy swords at dawn Sigmund?

If i wasn't under inforced bed rest I might take a trip out. Infact sod it i think a snack run to the shop using a car wouldn't be too much breaking the 'you must rest crappy rule' Although at this rate i am going to have to step away from the thread. Unless you can come up with an easy i really can't be arsed to cook but all i have eaten today is toast so need something proper with veg kinda solution for tea.

UQD. I evoke your name. You make yourself manifest.

When I went to bed we were discussing crumbles, diabetes, name-changing and MrG's bladder. I log in and we have MN Polizei crawling all over the place, slapping bans all over the place. What??