Inappropriate children's books

[FrannyandZooey]

"That's not my penis - its veins are too bulgy"

your turn now

hairy potter: the teenage years

Each Peach Pear Plum, Tom takes it up the bum,
Up the bum, in the cupboard, with a dildo and Mother Hubbard...

rofl at soup dragon

on that basis "peepo -who is that man in the next cubicle"

That's not my pelvic floor, it still has some tonus

And of course, that American classic Goodnight Mooncup

OMG Soupy, I am falling off my chair at that one!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

The Tiger Who Came in the Tea

Each Peach Pear Plum, Tom takes it up the bum,
Up the bum, in the cupboard, with a dildo and Mother Hubbard
Mother Hubbard in the cellar, going down on Cinderella.
Cinderella on a stair, look her fanjo's completely bare!
Bare fanjos torn asunder, all because of Baby Blunder
Baby Blunder's not asleep, to GFord's routine we keep.
GFord over the hill, firing rockets at Jack & Jill
Jack and Jill in the ditch, a threesome with the Wicked Witch
Wicked Witch over the wood, I'd shg Robin Hood
Robin Hood his merry men are lady boys (no fanjos then)
Fanjos, mooncups, Sainsburys (cnting) Where the fcuk is Baby Bunting?
Baby Bunting out in town, drinking beer and falling down.
Beer and wine, wine & red, mummy's p!ssed, she's off to bed.

Oh my fucking god, soupy, what an amazing poem. I particularly loved "not asleep, to Gfords routine we keep". Absolute class. amazing work!

Oh dear, I will not be able to read it to DD any longer!

LOL soupy

snort!!

My Naughty Little Sister gets pregnant

Horrid Henry and the Youth Detention Centre

GUFFAW! at these

did you make that up soupy?

In The Crack Kitchen

The Gruffalo's Child Born Out of Wedlock

LOL v good

Where's Willy?

The Princess and the Penis

at Soupy, that was marvellous

brilliant

The Randy Postman and other people's lovers

Once upon a ford cortina,
so they say,
A randy postman came one day
from the GUM clinic
with revenge to pay

.. and a present for the three bears.

OMG at the genius of Soupy!

Mr Magnolia had only one ball

Angelina the Ballerina and the Eating Disorder

Huge applause for Soupy - genius

Winnie the Poo

Charlote's Web of Deceit

Guess how much I hate you

The Cat Shat in the Hat

Green eggs and ham is just rude anyway,

'would you, could you in a car?
would you, could you with a goat?'

Cat Shat in the hat!!! Snort! And yes, I do snigger at Green Eggs and Ham.

I did make up Each Peach. Sadly it's one of BabyDragon's favourites and I'm not sure I'll be able to read it any more without adding "where the fcuk is Baby Bunting?" BTW, there's a typo in the last line, obviously the second "wine" should be "white"