Irish mn'ers, how much can you relate to UK mumsnetters?

[Anotherdayanotherdollar]

I read a lot of different threads on here, and recently I have come across so many issues/practices that I think just don't happen in Ireland. Now, I could be completely off the mark here, obviously there's local/cultural differences everywhere!

I don't know any parents who attend childrens birthday parties with their children (unless family etc),

I'm not aware of any dads who work "compressed hours" to care for their children. Although I know a lot of parents who work opposite shifts I suppose.

Funerals and the culture and practices surrounding death are all very different.

I don't have an abundance of parks/softplay/childrens activities nearby. If I did I'm sure they'd be too expensive to just pop in after school etc. 2 within 40 mins drive of me are €8-10 per hr.

Most children just go to their local school (baptism barrier dependent)

New mums here all seem to be inundated with visitors in hospital after their babies are born. I've never come across a new mum who isn't having visitors for the first week/fortnight etc so that they can bond.

Just a few examples there. So, are these typical observations of Irish people? Or just where I live/work? I know that local amenities are dependent on funding etc but it just seems that despite our close proximity to the UK there are big differences in day to day life.
I hope that all comes across ok. I'm just curious really.

I agree with their being a ratting out culture in England, but glad to hear thats not everywhere. I really think this has been consciously developed to divide and conquer the population

See how low the perception of bf is in Ireland though that you think half of babies feeding is ok/not that bad!

That's not what I said. I said its not fair to cast it off as something that doesn't happen when it does more than half of the time. My personal feelings on the low rate didn't come in to it. I acknowledged that the rates were much lower than we (professionally) would like and the many initiatives paper exercises are being funded.
100% of my dc have been bf if you prefer those statistics!

I must agree that you could cut the judgemental atmosphere with a knife in the playground of my children's junior school in Southern England. It was truly horrendous. My childless friend was almost blown away by it.

There was a 'play safe' officer in the local playground , who was unidentified, who would report any boisterous boys to the school. I mean if they swung off a tree branch or something.

Parents spread 'rumours' about children....

Honestly I wish we had moved to Ireland now...:)

I'm Irish. I live in Ireland. I am from Dublin but live away from there but I have lived here for 40+ years and going on this thread I am not typically Irish at all!

I breastfed. All of my friends did.
I have and use my postcode - again, everyone I know uses theirs.
I never offer biscuits with a cuppa because I don't eat them, therefore I do not buy them. If you come to mine for a cup of tea that is exactly what you will get.
Hate wakes - not fond of a lot of living people and dead ones creep me out. I also do not bring kids to funerals.
Local school is not 'grand' for me - I send to a different county for schooling.
Not catholic - well, i was once but fully reformed now.
Do not stay at kids parties supervising - why would you when you could have two glorious hours to yourself instead?
Similarly do not supervise own or other kids 'on the road', its all playdates and playcentres here.

Theres probably more examples but I will get called a West Brit if I continue

Also Irish.

Our Primary school in Dublin uses workbooks (which the kids write in and parents buy) for almost every subject in every year.

Hardly anyone “frowns upon” you if you take your kids out for a holiday in term time and you certainly don’t get fined!

Teachers leave school shortly after the kids, (1-2hours or so) don’t spend ages planning, filling in forms and there is no ofstead.

I do think primary school is more relaxed here and I don’t think Irish people are worse off for it.

Communion and confirmation are huge cultural events - though very few true believers.

Private secondary school in Dublin costs about €6k a year.

Also attitudes to the body - Irish couples holding hands and having a quick kiss/hug in public outside Dublin is a complete no no

Well now I feel like a right eejit as I've been living here for 43 years and had no idea about this........

You might have postcodes (I do know this!) but no one uses them!

Errr..... Yes they do. Amazon don't know that you're just up the lane and around the corner.

Oh God Omega1, that's exactly the kind of shit English attitude I'm talking about. You've personified it, congratulations. You would not be welcome in Ireland.

Too late, I've been welcomed there many times There's nothing remotely shit about my post. I was enjoying reading this thread and your post stuck out for taking a suddenly unpleasant tone. Cultural differences are interesting, just slating millions of people (Southern England, whatever that is) based on a few anecdotes is absurd and borderline racist.

" Oh God @Omega1 , that's exactly the kind of shit English attitude I'm talking about. You've personified it, congratulations. You would not be welcome in Ireland. "

Cowbell was that really necessary?

Not only is it not frowned upon to take the kids out of school during term time but it is actively encouraged half the time!

Only junior classes finish early - most schools finish in or around 2.30/3pm depending what time they start at.

I don't live in dublin and have travelled around most of Ireland and never got glared at nor beaten with a stick for holding hands and kissing in public. That is a very VERY strange remark!!!

One thing I found really bad, almost insulting, in the UK is the absolute ignorance of anything Irish at all. Compared to relatively good knowledge about say, France.

I was talking to a bloke who was actually married to an Irish woman and had spent tons of time in Ireland in holiday.

I don't know how it came up but it suddenly struck me to ask him who was the President of Ireland. Not a clue. Who was the Taoiseach? Not a clue. Who was the French President? "Oh Macron, obviously"

I was honestly shocked. But then how many people in the UK would be able to answer those questions?

I breastfed my children long term here in Ireland and no one batted an eyelid when I breastfed them out in public. They're now in their 20's. The only people who didn't like me breastfeeding were my own mother and MIL.

Elspeth that's really interesting. I've just asked myself those questions and I hadn't a clue. I've just googled them and I have actually never even heard their names.

I'm very well-read and follow the news and everything! I guess we just don't get much Irish news here (which is odd I suppose), certainly no politics unless it's particularly interesting e.g. The abortion vote and the gay marriage vote. Our news agenda is very much dominated by Brexit and so the more influential EU nations (France, Germany) would be better known in terms of leaders and politics.

Also, our media is obsessed with US politics so we know everything you never wanted to know about Trump.

My father would know the answers to those questions though and presumably other Irish people living here who follow news back home.

" One thing I found really bad, almost insulting, in the UK ...."

I will tell you what is insulting, in England, is the reaction to being Irish from certain people. I say England, because it doesn't happen in Wales, nor in Scotland I suppose.
Some people seem to think that the very fact of being Irish is hilarious..I really noticed it recently with an old neighbour talking about our family and the family who moved in after us. He was really taking the piss...
I am not really Irish but my dad is.

who was the President of Ireland. Not a clue.
Without looking it up, can you name the presidents of the following EU countries with a similar population to Ireland?
Denmark
Slovakia
Croatia
Finland

Woo hoo! Just went to GP (free) got my prescription (free). In Ireland, unpaid €50 for Doc, €134 per month for meds. My children have unusual names (only one is an Irish name). I breastfed all three but didn't know anyone else who bf'd. No prob re snogging & holding hands. Both DH and I have experienced discrimination (shrugs) ignorant tossers everywhere.

ifailed we are next door neighbours. Literally. With vast cross cultural ties going back 7 centuries.

But if I have to even explain that.......

I'm not Irish, (Welsh) but my DD studies in Dublin so we've been over a lot in the past year.

Differences we've noticed
The Irish university entrance system is much simpler than UCAS. No personal statement bullshit about how passionately you love your subject and have you done Duke of Edinburgh, just depends on your grades. Bit concerned that this leaves disadvantaged kids at shit schools missing out a bit though as, to some extent, the UK system acknowledges it's easier to score A*s in Britain than in some run down comp.

Irish admin is not very efficient or streamlined, in all sorts of systems, from uni stuff, to getting a number to allow you to work, to then reclaiming tax. It seems to be more paper based than the UK and much much slower. Also involves schlepping around to offices and making appointments and getting stuff signed off. I think it requires a certain change of mindset to deal with it.

Nice middle class/bright Irish kids seem much less druggy than their UK counterparts. Although of course they like a drink.

I think the Irish discrimination thing is regional in the UK. I live in the north west of England now, and DH said that after Brexit he was down the pub with a big group of his mates joking about getting an Irish passport and only one person in the big group didn't have an Irish grandparent. I've never heard anti Irish sentiment round here, or in Wales when I was growing up.

I can honestly say that I don't know any of the leaders of those countries but I would have thought it more relevant in the UK as we share a border. Perhaps it means more to us as we only have a break from one country but the UK are breaking up with the whole of the EU.

Only heard anti Irish sentiment once and that was in London when some twat, in a meeting I attended (with my obviously Irish name) said "you have to be careful of the Irish, you don't know who they know ". dick.

boiled bacon and cabbage for the your dinner with flowery spuds and butter

a hot whiskey to warm you up or if you had a shock

saying "good luck now" instead of saying "goodbye" but this could be a local thing where i'm from

the use of the word grand

saying "byebyebyebye" before hanging up the phone

being polite by refusing at first when offered a cup of tea and having to be convinced to have one a la Mrs Doyle on Fr Ted

not accepting no for an answer when offering a cup of tea and making sure you'll have something to go with it like a "bit of cake" or a biscuit.

knowing that all your neighbours will know your business but the flip side of that coin is having a great social support network for when things go wrong or help is needed.

A friend who lived in the UK recounted a story of being in a fancy tent at the Oval, and mistakenly took a glass of wine from a bottle belonging to another table. Profusely apologised to the other group, but one of the guys turned his back and said very loudly to his friends "Irish of course, you have to keep everything nailed down".

When I started my first job in London I asked one of my junior colleagues to get something from the press for a patient. They were too polite to question me so wandered around the ward for a while before getting back to ask me what on earth a press was?!

Isn't a press a Scottish thing? I've only ever heard my sister's Scottish MIL say it.