How can it be THIS difficult to live in the south?!

[CharlotteB94]

So I don’t think this is going to be a popular post. I’m 12 weeks pregnant with first baby and last night husband and I were talking budgets as we are trying to buy our first home out of London, currently renting in London.

I would just like to say we are working in industries that don’t exist or are far lower paid outside London and when I say that I mean we also don’t want to go and live somewhere miles and miles from family and friends where opportunities for career growth are limited. We want some form of quality of life.

We have both worked extremely hard for years and built good careers and salaries, and are buying without any parental help or inheritance and have managed to save while renting for years which of course is a feat in itself.

Even with this in mind, we are finding the house prices anywhere within commuting distance of London, safe and reasonably desirable to bring up a family, absolutely prohibitive when I’m about to go onto SMP. I am talking mortgage repayments of £3k a month. It’s really crushing to have worked and saved so hard and to realise that we are going to have to buy a place that isn’t suitable or what we wanted.

in addition, I wanted to highlight that in this current crisis, people like us who have higher salaries, get absolutely nothing from the government: no child benefit, no funded hours, nothing. Based on the budget calcations we did yesterday we would be living hand to mouth each month saving nothing while I’m off and hardly any better off when I go back to work with these crippling mortgage payments.

I don’t know what age gap people are putting in between kids when they have no help from government as we simply couldn’t ever afford for me to be off work or for a house to live in while paying £40k a year in childcare for 2. This is based on my husband being on over £100k a year. It is WILD.

i honestly don’t know how the system is so broken!! it’s depressing being pregnant for the first time in this world having tried everything to make a successful life for our kids and still being in this position. I just cannot understand at all how people are coping. I wish I could leave the UK but family are here.

that’s all I wanted to say, any thoughts welcome.

The OP is getting a hard time for pointing out that even well off people have seen their immediate prospects and aspirations go backwards. It’s not a commentary about those who have it much tougher. If she’s even struggling to raise a family in a house that would have been acceptable to a professional dual income family a decade ago, what hope is there?

OP let us know the area you need to commute in to. I love a rightmove challenge!

Why don’t you draw up a shortlist of areas you find vaguely attractive outside London that are also commutable and try to rent there? Hopefully it will be cheaper than London rents and will allow you to try before you buy. Feel free to PM.

I've just looked it up. The train season ticket would be £5k now. It was £3.5k when I was doing it. I managed it on a much smaller household income than the OP is talking about.

Is it more that you have only now realised how much a steady life costs. It's a hard reality check when you have been concentrating on building a career, without actually looking at what living costs actually are.

I was in a similar situation when I have been looking at my pension. I thought I was saving enough but I am WAY off and have to seriously think about my budget now. I have worked really hard and made sacrifices in other areas and was just getting to the point where I thought I could relax and start enjoying it, and it was a real bummer!

If you think it's any better outside London, you're mistaken - it's just as bad or worse, on proportionate salaries vs property prices.

My childcare is over £15k pa for part of the week, outside London. I wouldn't be surprised if you'd have to budget £50k + pa for 2 children in or near London.

I’m talking about having the choice taken away of where to live and whether that is miles from everyone you know, family and help with a young baby This is interesting because for many years the choice was move away for better jobs/salaries/opportunities. For you all those boxes are ticked and you are near family. Something has to give when children arrive though. You never know family might follow you out of London.

This house is very cute, and 0.2 miles from the station, with a 15 min commute into Victoria.
https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/144984878

I live near here, and it’s the best of both worlds - good shopping centre, lots of green spaces, 10 min drive to beautiful countryside and forests…
I moved here from zone 2, and would never go back!

Go back to work.
If smp is not enough.

What about somewhere like Corby? It’s got a direct train to London just under 1.5 hours. Lots of commuters now with hybrid working, so the demographic is changing.

This 4 bed detached house is £340k. So mortgage payment c.£1,800 pcm with a 10% deposit.

https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/144326081#/?channel=RES_BUY

There are other towns on this train line closer to London.

Come to Yorkshire!

It’s wild that you earn well over 100K and aren’t able to afford to buy without a mortgage to be honest. With that sort of income you should be able to afford the expensive houses in Kent or Essex I assume from the figures with a very small mortgage.

Live within your means and stop moaning! There a people that can’t afford a house that costs in total what you 2 earn in a year!

There is very good quality of life in the north but perhaps it’s just as well lots of people think otherwise - if they realised how good it is, they’d all come! Seriously, why would you get government help if you’re high earners? And while I appreciate you don’t want to move away from family etc, there is life outside your current locale. Even good quality life, believe it or not!

What flat or house price are you looking at and where do you need to get to? People can look up 2 bed houses and flats in that range.

That’s hardly helpful, is it? Remember the words of Thumper the rabbit.

we managed to get mortgage free by 40 by saving like crazy.My husband worked 60 hours a week by 5 x 12 hours.When he got in to do the bed run i went to work in a restaurant until 1am.It was utterly exhausting but it paid for playgroup shoes clothes etc and allowed us to save.

How, pray tell, would they be able to buy a house without a mortgage on that income? I moved from Essex 4 years ago; a cheap house in a town with a station will set you back at least £300k, then you need £5k a year for your season ticket.

@CharlotteB94

Try living on min wage or just above in London. The people who get help from the government can only dream of earning enough to pay 3k a month mortgage. They work extremely hard too.

Husband earns over £100 k , instead of paying childcare you maybe better off having those years off work until school age. 3 bed house within commuting distance is not that much. No quality of life , living hand to mouth , is a bit dramatic .

Housing association schemes?

When one of them is earning 100k? You're having a laugh. Housing associations are for those on low wages, not those that have a 500k+ budget and just don't want to compromise.

Last paragraph; spot on.
How can you not afford a £36,000 mortgage on £100,000+? It's a third of your income...no; a third of just your husband's income.

2 bed flat in london zone 3, mortgage is £1020 due to rise to £1250.5 outstanding schools within 0. 5 miles

After tax income - £7000 combined based on £120k combined.. Would be £7397 next year as dh would have paid off student loan. Still leaves £4k after childcare and mortgage.

Looking to buy a bigger 2/3 bed flat. In most dense cities around the world, professionals live in flats. We don't like flats here because of the leasehold system so i only look for flats where freehold is owned by residents and there are lots of them in London.. We could complain but in the 1990s family friends of dh (accountant and solicitor) also bought a 2 bed 1930s flat as their first property

My heart bleeds for you. No help from the government but on 100k a year. Why should I, who does live hand to mouth, pay for you to have child benefit which you don’t need. Cut your cloth and get in the real world. Why should the government give you money when you earn so much. It’s greed and entitlement at its very best. We earn below the average salary each, we both work full time and pay £1000 a month in childcare. We aren’t on any benefits at all, receive no government help other than CB, and it helps at the end of the month when you’re running out of nappies, low on formula and their clothes are starting to get small. A life line. I’m sure you can do without £96 a month when your husband alone earns x4 what we do as a couple. You can’t have you cake and eat it. Get real.

OP doesn’t qualify for CB but her tax more than paying for yours, especially as you and your OH are barely paying any at all being on £25 between you.

Excuse me? We both do pay tax, and we don’t qualify for any help at all. We are on £25k each. £1000 a month in child care which would be more of my husband didn’t work condensed shifts. We make it work because we have to. I can’t wait for the day that the childcare costs isn’t a worry anymore. We can’t afford a second child. This is the real world. Not moaning about earning £100k and not receiving £96 a month. OP doesn’t pay for me, thank you very much. We also both work very hard. I had to retrain and have an hour commute to work to get my job, I the hope one day I’ll be able to earn that much money and be grateful I woudlnt need the £96 a month. Tosser.

yes it’s tough but you’re in the same boat as many others

as its your first home, buy a flat or small house

or buy further out. There are plenty of affordable homes in commuter towns in the home counties