Frugal the flip to make the festivities fun

[lifelongfrugaleer]

Wasn’t going to be flip but decided to be polite
46 days or so

don’t panic frugaleers

Oh yes welcome to the new people as well :) sorry I forgot to include that in my earlier post!

Just catching up on all the posts, we are a busy lot! A busy and quite spendy day for me yesterday. About £99 on online Tesco food shop (but included Xmas cake ingredients), £33 at ikea (included stocking stuff and plates for someone else so not too bad). £20 on meatballs for DD and me at ikea. Also had gone earlier in the day on a drive with a friend to build her confidence, we stopped at Morrisons cafe for lunch so £8 there. And finally was a football in the morning with DS2 so £3 on a costa coffee!

I did debate whether it was worth schlepping to ikea as it was such a busy day. But surprisingly DD and I had quite a chat in the car about the mental health issues she had in lockdown, and she told me lots of stuff she hadn’t told us at the time. Spending time one on one with teenagers (and car drives) really is a thing isn’t it.
mrs aw shame about wales. Lots of football in our house, it’s on now as I type
em good for you with the meds, recognising it is half the battle I think.
weight hope your little one is better soon
tayto sounds like your DD will have a lovely xmas
life hope you made it to the gym 😂
socathe that’s lovely your mum slipped you the petrol money
excellent curls to get something for free
so sorry time to hear about your dad. My DDad has dementia too, his is mainly apparent in being angry and rude (quite like a toddler). He had just come out of hospital with sepsis and we’ve realised my DMum is struggling more than we thought, need to ring them shortly.
need glad you had a lovely visit
alfie great to hear DD is still split from the awful boyfriend. My DD is getting more assertive with her drama queen partner.
right, better make that call!

I’ve been dipping in & out of these threads under various disguises for a while. I don’t celebrate Christmas but I have 13 family birthdays to buy gifts for. So it’s a blessing really that Christmas is off the menu otherwise I’d have been in a pickle financially.

Come and join the Christmas bargain thread, it’s on thread #15 atm. I’ve saved a fortune with all the discount codes and live deals.
www.mumsnet.com/talk/christmas/4684811-thread-15-the-one-where-we-broke-amazon

@marthasmum I always joke that I can't go to IKEA without spending at least £50! I love it but it's dangerous haha.

So we're with British Gas for gas and electricity, we were £337 in credit and they have without asking refunded £300 to our bank account. Which leaves us barely in credit going into the coldest months. They've also put our monthly DD down to £156?! It was previously £200. We have a year's worth of metre readings with them now and we are just below typical use (our energy costs should average approx £195/month across the year with the current govt price cap). They send the government £66/month help straight to our bank account so the monthly DD does not take that into account. This doesn't make any sense does it?! What are they doing? I don't want to end up in debit to them. I've put the DD back up to £200 but not sure whether to put the £300 back into the energy account or if they'll just refund it again. Hmmm

That's lovely re your parents socathe, how thoughtful of them. Nuts re the energy. They tried to reduce our direct debit too by £66 a month but I put it back up again as, like you, I'd rather be in credit at the minute.

Thanks flaming

martha, I used to get more out of DS, who is not great at talking, when I was driving and he a passenger. I think it's the lack of eye contact makes it less pressured for them.

I've basically used this morning to clear out loads of stuff from the garage that should have gone to the tip years ago (old tins of paint etc), took the old TV to the tip too, which was super heavy (it was 15 years old and our only TV, I think 15 years for a TV made it good value overall, we've just indulged in a Sky Glass on a deal as my contract was up). I've Free-Cycled some old tub chairs and sold a good quality coffee table that got stuck in the study for years not really needed or wanted. Did the same with an Ottoman last week - DH moaned we won't have any furniture left!

I don’t understand why they are refunding either

great clearing out need, I’ve sorted some cupboards today too

i don’t go to the gym but took the dog for a decent walk

Time l am so sorry sweetheart , it's so sad seeing our parents like this , it's like their whole life before has gone in the blink of an eye
Life l have pared down this year too , l was in the little bedroom sorting out the presents to wrap and there was stuff in there from previous years that is not wanted now , ie books , jigsaws, dvds, soft toys & handbags
Weight you are very sensible l only wish l had your insight when mine were little
Need that segue experience sounds fab
Socathe bless your lovely parents
Tayto thank you Mum is fine no sign of Covid , fingers crossed for the speed camera
Have a lovely time at the theatre
Welcome Dexter
Curls l need varifocals but l am resisting them lol
Em hope the swimming worked bless you sweetheart hope you feel much better soon
Spends today 48 Morrisons on groceries , they have Indian and Chinese bags for £5 so l bought one of each

I hope you get to see your dad time

Grrr....was congratulating myself for being close to resolving all the 'legacy' costs of last year's £5k hole, being able to scrape through Christmas in a not-too-shabby way, and start tackling a manageable task in the new year (i.e. pay off credit cards inside 0% period, accumulate some savings, and build holiday funds) when I broke a tooth. It's a veneer. The last time I did this, about 3 years ago, it cost £750 to replace. I can't imagine prices will have gone down.

So, it's not a disaster, I have space on a 0% card to pay for it, and I will just have to pay it off. But honestly! I am fed up.

Ah rubbish big

I know! oh, well. This is why it's important to have that £1000 cushion, like Dave Ramsey says. Bugger.

So: new plan for new year. As well as the money I will be saving by having finished therapy, I will not be doing the second term of the French course. I'll just keep studying privately, and then sign up for something later in the year. And I'll defer making overpayments on the mortgage for a month or two. That should generate about £600 in January.

Sorry to take up space with a rather trivial issue - I'm aware of how much other posters have on their plates. Just sounding off.

Refund of £141 from the water co. Which is a SUPRISE. usually we have to actually request these from the utility cos. But hey ho!

spends yesterday £29 on school uniform for the dc. New jumper and T-shirt for dd at nursery and new pe trousers for ds.

It’s not trivial as it’s important to you big

I fully agree with life, big. Just when you think there's some clear head space then something else happens, it can feel relentless. Vent away. Plus dental work costs are insane....

Hoping for a NSD.

Ouch big. Ouch for the money and literally ouch for the broken tooth hope you are ok. Its not trivial its still a cost at the end of the day.

£1000 buffer you say....that's Interesting. We could do with something like this for unexpected bills eg car repairs, things breaking in the house. Our tumble dryer has started sounding like it's about to give up but 🤞🤞🤞 it holds on we rely on it.

We also really need new windows we had one done in lockdown but need 2 more doing. One doesn't open one doesn't close 🙄 I'm hoping if we can cut back even more in Jan we will be able to save up for them.

I recognise some people from the no spend Jan thread!

Still waiting on biopsy results, postal strikes aren't helping the situation! I want to know either way by Christmas...if it's cancer we can make a plan going forward and if it's not I can move on with the rest of my life! In good news though I managed to carefully lift my toddler over the weekend just onto my knee and they said "mama you all better now". I cried!

Have a good frugaleering week all!

Hi would you mind if I joined? Am so worried about money and dreading Christmas this year my DC's are 13 and 9 and I lost my Dad to Covid in January this year. I lost my Mum nine years ago and just wanted to cancel Christmas but can't because of the children. Have bought some Christmas bits for my youngest's stocking and need to get some more main presents. We had saved some money for Christmas but have had to dip into the pot as unexpected costs have come up :-( A lot of you sound so fantastic and organised well done. Am nomally pretty organised but feel really flat and have now found out we have a leak in the guttering not sure how we can afford that so close to Christmas have some Christmas savings left but don't want to dip into it as need to buy more for the children. Fell a rubbish Mum. x

welcome!

first off - stop bearing yourself up. you are not a rubbish mum.

i totally get that christmas can be a struggle - but surely what matters is that you are with people you love and that you get time together. your kids are hopefully old enough to understand that maybe christmas won't be as extravagant as previous. so explain it to them.

the leak in the guttering sounds like a nightmare, but can you get someone to patch it for now? (or hope that it's like mine and fills up with leaves and gunk so plugs itself - unless that's what has caused it...)

what have the children been bought already - is there anything that could if needed be taken back? depends on how many gifts you usually go for.

a lot easier said than done i know. but we are very friendly here, stick around and let us listen to you - even if that's all we can do. it's nice to have a cozy sounding board like this!

i ordered some more period pants from modi-bodi. annoyingly some of mine have developed holes. i emailed them and they will take them back - as they are fairly new still. they will part refund these for me. so a win there.

today i have spoken to the agent re our flights to get seats booked. i could "only" do 3 of the 5 flights myself, so called up told what i wanted and she's going to deal with the rest.

i also need to book a hotel at heathrow for the night before we fly out. we land there at 7pm and our flight to singapore goes at 10am the following morning.

BA have helpfully changed my return flight from heathrow so in january we land from perth (after pretty much 20 hour travel) at 8am. we were due back here on the 12 noon (fish) flight. giving us time to get through immigration, baggage claim, have something to eat, and get on the flight home, back in the house by 2pm. but no. BA have cancelled that flight. and i had a choice of rebooking (for free) onto the 7am flight that day (duh...no as won't be in london). or the 7pm one. so now have to spend an entire day in the airport with two jet lagged kids. need to work on booking a lounge or something so we have more space. will speak to the boss tomorrow and see if he can help me out - he's a BA gold card holder, so might be able to do something re a lounge. dh thinks we'll fine, and can just hang in the departures, but i'm more than willing to pay for lounge access. as it includes food. and drinks. and a comfy couch somewhere. either that or a hotel

working from home today - have someone coming up at 1230 to collect a car seat i'm selling so that'll be £80 in my pocket. yay.

alternating between working and laundry.

i also need to book both kids in for school hot lunches for the first week we're back in January - jet lag plus lunchboxes is not a good idea. making things super easy for ourselves. i also made 2 lasagnes yesterday. one for dinner and one for the first week back -again making things easy.

ememem84 Thank you x You sound super organised well done. Its the gunk that has caused the guttering to come lose and spilling water down the exterior walls trying to stay positive until I speak to someone in the know, Thanks you for the welcome and tips. x

Hello Myfanwy81. If the guttering has come away from the wall, perhaps it would be an easy repair - just clear the gunk (rubber gloves, plastic bags) and screw the bracket back into place? Assuming that you have a ladder and the brackets haven't broken. Sometimes a general 'handyman' can be cheaper than a specialist guttering/roofer for a repair like that.

As for Christmas - god, it can be pants, can't it? Especially if you are simply not feeling it because of bereavement. On a practical level, I have found that limiting gifts to children only, including practical items that you would have bought anyway (like socks, pants, bath gel, shampoo, moisturiser, new flannels, favourite food items, hair slides/bands, new pens) in their stockings sort of bulks things out and increases the time spent on finding new things (which is most of the fun of presents, often), are ways of saving without feeling you are going without. We don't buy a tree anymore, but have lots of green in the house - ivy is easy to find, easy to cut and carry home, and lasts a long time. It looks nice on mantelpieces with fairy lights and baubles in among it, or down the middle of a table. Can you get the kids to make playlists for this year's Christmas soundtrack?

Decaff - you must be on tenterhooks, I hope you get your results soon and they are good.

The £1000 emergency fund idea comes from Dave Ramsey, and it's the first of his 'baby steps'. The idea is you get together this emergency fund before you do anything else, even paying off debt (I guess it depends on the type of debt, but you still try and prioritise building the emergency fund) because having that emergency pot there will prevent you from going into MORE debt when your tumble drier or your tooth breaks. The second step, once you have that emergency pot, is paying off debts by the snowball method - smallest first.

Dentist did a repair and so I no longer have an attractive gap and a little stub at the front of my mouth. That cost £165. The tooth will have to be replaced, and this time, it will cost £835, so that's £1000 in total. I am cutting up my food into tiny pieces so I can put it straight into the safe bit of my mouth for chewing, and don't have to bite down on anything with my dodgy repair. So - if I had my emergency fund in place (and I have spent the whole year building this up and then spending it again!) I would have still cursed my luck at breaking my tooth, but I wouldn't have to have stuffed more payments onto my credit card.

Welcome Myfanwy
Decaffe hope you hear very good news very soon sweetheart
Em you have done so well with all the planning, you ave really thought it through well done!
BigSkies l hate going to the dentist and l would really hate having to pay all that money for a tooth repair, l am really empathising with you here
I think it's a NSD for me , l have not bought anything on Cyber Monday l am feeling very virtuous financially

@decaff hope you get some news very soon, nothing worse than feeling in limbo.

welcome @Myfanwy81 Sounds like you’ve had a tough time. Try not to feel guilty about have the kids got enough, am I doing enough. You’re together and you’ve got each other. Practical presents are a great idea like @BigSkies2022 said, kids just like to unwrap things, and if it’s something you needed to get
them anyway, everyone’s a winner!

One more day till payday, I’m hanging in there by the skin of my teeth! Had to borrow a bit from the Christmas fund to tide me over. Got breakfast with a friend tomorrow, luckily it’s her turn to pay.

Managed to sneak stuffing balls and a bottle of wine for my Christmas stash into the weekly shopping budget.

We always do practical presents but a bit more fun than the rest of the year iyswim so slogan pants rather than just plain.

Very well organized em, your future self will love you. Get the lounge on the way back, definitely

lsd picked some bits up in Superdrug

Sorry my I answered you t didn’t say hi, so hi
and you are not a shit mum and the kids will understand if you explain it to them.