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Frugal friends follow each other frugally through Hallowe'en, COVID all welcome

999 replies

Happierwithouthim · 19/10/2020 11:12

Here you go life

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Bornlazy · 27/10/2020 20:46

Pumpkin your dc are beautiful 💕 I'm glad your dd is feeling a bit better.

Happier your patience has been truly tested with this house move. I hope you get some good news soon. We have Disney plus and my youngest is 15 even the 17yr old watches it. It really took off during lockdown.

Thanks for all the get well wishes I haven't been sick since about 0200 so that's good but I now have a sore throat and ear and a headache too. Where do these bugs come from when we are all washing hands more often and wearing masks?
I don't disinfect keys and my phone the way I did at the start so maybe I need to up my game a bit

I miss the old posters too wolf I hope they are all well and know that we miss their general chat and advice. It would be lovely to see them back.

lifelongfrugaleer · 28/10/2020 06:39

£30 axe throwing with ds yesterday. Good fun

Wolfcub · 28/10/2020 08:03

Good point re Wreck Mrs and also Cag. I am sure we are missing others as well and all are missed

Happierwithouthim · 28/10/2020 08:41

Miss all the regular posters who are no longer with us
jam need poster on island who retired and wanted to buy a camper van whose name escapes me lonely wreck cag poster with the seasonal lists whose names also escapes me collie??

Well they say a leopard never changes his spots and it's certainly true regarding my ex. He just stopped short of blaming me for dd's teeth needing braces, threatened cutting maintenance and told me in no uncertain terms that he wouldn't be paying for the braces that I want her to get!! In our legal separation he's legally bound to pay for them!! I've deferred it until after Christmas because I want to get my house first and I don't want another expense showing up on my record but I'll start her then and get my solicitor to send him a letter looking for payment for them citing the terms of the legal separation.

He finished up with that he'd see me in court and that he was up to his neck in it. How he has spent half the proceeds of the house in 8 months is beyond me but it's not my problem anymore. He made a swipe with his hand above my head by the way knocking a cobweb but I think it was to see if I'd flinch or cower under it. I didn't.

After I left I cried with frustration that he still had power to frustrate me and upset me like he did. But during the night I came to terms with it. No one will ever make me feel like he does because I've learned from his bad behaviour.

My fear now is that he will retain dc Santa presents and I'd have nothing for them on Christmas morning. Wondering if I should get stuff and find out if I can get refunds if necessary.

He's a manipulative spiteful man and even said in front of them yesterday how much maintenance he pays so would he go as far as that, reading this you'd think only I would know, but I don't.

Arrgh ignore the waffling, it helps to type it out.

One good thing is I don't binge after he does this anymore so that's something.

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Wolfcub · 28/10/2020 08:50

Bloody hell Happier that sounds horrendous are you really ok? Well done for not flinching, he doesn't have power over you you have the separation agreement and you can use it if he wants to be an arse about things.

It might be worth having one or two emergency presents each that can be returned

Happierwithouthim · 28/10/2020 09:18

wolf I hate being a cliche but if he wants to play it like that fine, I can manage just fine without his money and if he decides not to spend time with the dc too I'll manage then too.

Bf talked me down a bit after being there too, he was just like you'd be better off if he wasn't in yours or the dc's life but it's easy for him to be blase like that about it. Dc love him. They do see his flaws though. Like yesterday he confronted ds about something ds had said to me and ds agreed with what he said even though it wasn't true because he was afraid to go against him.

Dc hugged me over and over again last night and told me not to cry about what their dad said to me, not to let him upset me. ds actually put his hot water bottle into my bed to offer some comfort to me for the night.

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ememem84 · 28/10/2020 09:23

Cags on the getting rid of one thing a day thread. She’s ok x

ememem84 · 28/10/2020 09:26

I’m sitting having coffee. On. My. Own.

I’ve finished a book (life in pieces by Dawn o’porter) and have had a Danish pastry.

There are a couple of job interviews going on in here. It’s interesting to watch the dynamics.

The big thing here is that I’m on my own. Dc at nursery. Dh at work. I’m on a couple of days off snd am meeting dsis in half hour or so to blitz the Christmas shopping. Then have lunch and wine. Yippee! £4.25 coffee and pastry.

Frugal friends follow each other frugally through Hallowe'en, COVID all welcome
SnugglySnerd · 28/10/2020 09:44

Happier that's awful. He's a twat. Your dcs sound lovely though!

Happierwithouthim · 28/10/2020 09:48

I got rid of two bin bags of dc clothes at weekend does that cover me for rest of the year? Grin

Sounds like a lovely me day for you em enjoy!

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Happierwithouthim · 28/10/2020 09:49

snuggly 100% certified twat, although I used less polite words last night when I was speaking to bf about him.

They are lovely children, not without their faults obviously but we're a good team.

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lifelongfrugaleer · 28/10/2020 09:58

He is a twat happier.

Wreck pops up every now and again on the weight loss thread.

It's laska you couldn't think of with the retirement camper.

Unescorted · 28/10/2020 10:26

happier He is a grade A cheesy knob end. Your babies sound lovely - obviously having such a wonderful mum has paid dividends.

I was thinking of past frugaleers too this morning.

This is quite embarrassing ...with doing Sober October I somehow have an extra £600 in my bank account. Some of it will have been saved from not eating out or random late night eBay purchases.... but still that is a lot of money.

Happierwithouthim · 28/10/2020 11:00

Thanks life I could remember details about her but not username!

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Happierwithouthim · 28/10/2020 11:03

Wow unescorted I doubt you were drinking that much!! Do you miss the shopping?

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Happierwithouthim · 28/10/2020 11:06

I've continued to put what I was giving to aupair into childcare category in ynab. Not what she was costing in incidentals such as food/car insurance etc but just her salary. It's the one category I refuse to dip into. The balance is €498.72 currently, and at end of this week will be €473.72 despite paying for two days childcare.

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Unescorted · 28/10/2020 11:53

The shopping was not me.... dh misses it. Our post people and My Hermes lady are worried that they have inadvertently offended us.

Bornlazy · 28/10/2020 13:57

Happier that's a really tough one. He sounds like a total bastard but would he hurt his kids like that to hurt you? You would hope not but some men do. I would find it hard to have to rely on him to do the right thing when he hasn't always up until now.
Could you ask to keep some of the presents at yours and some at his incase covid struck and made it difficult to transfer gifts on the day?

em enjoy your day it sounds bliss. I need to get my ds to write lists of what they want so I can make a start on them. I've got quite a lot for other people but not much for them and of course everything they want is £££££s

Unescorted think I might have drank your share this month Blush I've been off on holiday and consoling myself about basically not being able to do anything.

CamdenLurker · 28/10/2020 16:54

Hey guys!

Day off today and I'm on the tube coming home from a day out to London with both DD's, we spent about 3 hours in Selfridges Confused and I'm exhausted.

Spent £12 on a jigsaw puzzle, £5 on shortbread for ds2, and £238 on a hoodie and T-shirt for ds2 and a jumper for Dh. Put it on the credit card which is t great but it's payday on Friday so I'll pay it off then. Couldn't face coming back into the west end again before Christmas.£16 in M&S cafe and £8 in the food hall.

Dd bought herself some stuff in John Lewis Haberdashery dept. Can't wait to get home.

Talking of missing posters, who was the poster with two little boys, she didn't have a garden and through lockdown someone else here was 'sharing' their garden with her? Anyone remember?

Sorry to hear that you're feeling down happier, it's so frustrating where you are at the mercy of someone that wants to play nasty games with you. Stay strong Thanks

ememem84 · 28/10/2020 17:04

I’ll catch up later. But in short. I’m broke and pissed.

Dsis and I have done Christmas shopping snd have had a lot of wine. And a yum lunch. Life is so good.

Loves ya.

Wolfcub · 28/10/2020 17:12

Love you too Em

I think I've also been drinking the wine Unescorted hasn't. Need to go to the bottle bank of shame

Up into the national park today for a walk and some photography with dparents. £34 farm shop for picnic lunch bits and some shopping for dm

I have spent far far too much this month, totally out of control. Pay day Friday so need to get a grip

northender · 28/10/2020 17:27

Sounds like a good day Em
Happier what a bastard. Well done on staying strong with him & not flinching.
Spendy week here as we're away for a few days, planned ages ago. Not going to pubs etc so just money on a Tesco order and takeaways! It's lovely to have a break. Its not been very exciting. I've crocheted, read books & we've played cards and gone for walks. Home tomorrow, late. I think we've all had enough now of being together over the past few months. DH & Ds are home all the time, at least DD & I get out to work & school. It's so hard going isn't it?
Trying to Christmas present shop but not making much progress yet.
After a spendy week, need to rein in the finances again.

northender · 28/10/2020 18:54

Crochet so far, first I've done since I was about 11 I think!

Frugal friends follow each other frugally through Hallowe'en, COVID all welcome
Mrsmadevans · 28/10/2020 19:15

North that is excellent well done! Have a lovely time away Smile
I am so cackhanded l can't do crochet or knitting l am useless!
Em lovely cuppa & pastry yummy & catch up wth your Dsis , you are doing great with your Christmas planning!
Unescorted l have stuck to no wine or alcohol this month just like we said but l am not up £600 quid tbf l have been buying stuff for Dd2 house Smile Halo Grin
Wolf that sounds a lovely day Smile
Camden can't remember who that poster was might have been before my day though , lt sounds like you jad a brilliant day Smile
Happier l am so sorry you had to go through that yesterday, it really is not right for you to have to put up with treatment like that . The sooner you are rid of him the better Flowers your Dc are absolute darlings xx
Life yes Wreck does pop on the weight loss thread , l must go and look at the getting rid of one thing a day thread l really need that ! Grin
Born that is brill you are getting better , Flowers l know re the illnesses and all this PPE and hand washing you would think we would be fine!

lifelongfrugaleer · 28/10/2020 19:27

I fell off the one thing a day thread as not much clutter left.
£600 wow

Sainsbury's double up. Voucher swap Starts today. Spend from the 11th