The Lockdown Saving and Spending Continues! May Frugaleers continued

[LaneBoy]

New thread!

Gosh yes food prices. Eyewatering here too. I am buying better and more places but it's still £££. I am still also using pantry and random Brexit stuff.

I'm back to home baking too. I've got rubard and apple To use up. I can feel a flapjack and crumble coming on today. Or an apple cake.
Making ginger biscuits from my gran recipe as well.
Need to Audit the freezer today. Will have a job day as weather not so good and go out tomorrow as looks better. Not sure where will not be packed and open. Might go to the Moors.

I love just spoken to Dm. Told her exactly how I’m feeling. She doesn’t get it. But I tried not to moan.

But essentially it’s the lack of space. Mental and physical.

As of later on today (because I’ve missed the window today) I’m going to go for a run or a walk.

Tomorrow morning I’m going to do the same. Get up. Go for a walk. Get the headspace.

I need to instill the “work me and home me” into dh. He interrupts all the time. Asking home related questions. So I lose focus. It’s difficult because there is nowhere really I can seperate myself physically. Outside - get disturbed; bedroom - get disturbed; garage desk - get disturbed; so I’ve taken to working from the dining room table. Meaning that I’m always on hand and I just expect to be disturbed.

Not next week the week after I’m going into the office for a day. Just to sort things out get some headspace.

Unescorted sausage rolls. I make mine and freeze raw on the tray (complete with eggy wash). When they've frozen they all go in a bag and oven cook from frozen in 30-40 mins.

Same for little cheese and onion tarts made in a bun tin (I do cook those before freezing)

It rained a lot last night and smells fresher. I've been up to empty and reload the dishwasher but have brought my cuppa back to bed

Might make the good food chocolate fudge cookies later but as I made a cake yesterday this would probably be a bad thing for waistlines

Going for a walk when I get up. Can't decide if it's a welly job or not. Then we might play a game

Is there a room with a door you can lock while you're working Em ? Hope you're ok sorry you're having such a tough time. You definitely need more support and some time for yourself.

I feel grim, it's Eid and I had a terrible night last night, I felt so low which came on quite suddenly, cried for hours and hours and haven't slept much. My eyes look awful, the bags! Trying to stay calm and in a better mood now though, my DD deserves it. Lockdown seems to have affected my mental health which I'm a bit surprised by because tbh not a whole lot has changed for us, and I actually prefer WFH than having to commute 1hr each way to work for example. Maybe it's just a coincidence even, who knows.

Today won't be an NSD as going to get a takeaway for dinner to celebrate Eid.

Em my therapist was saying how hard it is for people WFH as in some ways more is expected from you because you don’t have that separation, no commute (however stressful that is, at least it’s a “moving from home mode to work mode” thing), even little things like the walk back from a meeting room to your desk disappear in these conditions, and those things really add up over a day/week. And like you said, being constantly on call for family stuff. She was telling me (with permission obv) another client covers his computer with a sheet when it’s not working hours so it doesn’t encroach on his relaxation time. But it’s harder the other way round if your DH is bugging you. Could he not at least “give” you an hour a couple of times a day where he absolutely does not ask you anything?

Failing that there’s always this sign 😅

Food prices are driving me insane. We are very lucky that due to the circumstances we were in before, we aren’t losing any income due to the pandemic, but we are somehow still not managing food bills very well. TBH though we need fo go through the kitchen and check what we have to use up - we’ve been topping up more due to not being able to get a delivery every week, which is definitely adding to the impulsive buys 😳

Oh meadow I’m sorry you feel so low (It’s Cagliostro BTW, not sure if you were off the thread when I changed!) I have been surprised at how affected I am sometimes, considering I’m much better in other ways - without a lot of usual stresses like crowded public transport, group meetings etc I have been a lot less anxious for the most part. Most of my friends are also autistic and they find the same, most of them are really happy with less of the outside world. And I’m definitely happier with fewer demands on me, and am already finding the return to clubs stressful (just little things like having to fit dinner around zoom classes)

Like em said, lack of space is an issue, much as I can go up to my room or sit in the garden or whatever it’s not the same as actually going for a swim or to the pub with a book where even if there’s noise and crowds it’s nothing that I need to deal with as it’s not my kids/house! I think a lot of people generally are finding moods fluctuating a lot, I’ve heard the term “coronacoaster” which sums it up I think! I have mostly been getting by with the odd stressy few days but it finally got to me the other day and I was crying a lot too.

It must be hard with it being Eid too, even if it’s normally a quiet celebration for your family it’s still very different with all this forced isolation

Freeze scones before baking then add 5 mins on. Samosas too.

It's ok meadow to feel like that for no apparent reason. Significant celebration days like Eid bring it home how much things have changed even if you might have had a quiet celebration before this time you are forced to do so which is much different.

That happens here em. I'm trying to focus on a big bit of work and everyone interrupts. When you find the answer key me know. Office not an option for me though.

em your DH needs a large kick up the bum. You need time to yourself, and when you are working, you need that time to concentrate. Personally I would invest in large headphones and ignore him when working. Then say you are going food shopping but take a nice long walk before hand, getting time to yourself. If he wont give you time willingly take it by force!!

My DH hasn't been too bad, he's still been working so I've taken over school stuff and he does housework (badly so I often have to top it up, but I'm a self confessed control freak!). I'm going back on 1st June and its going to be v full on so that's going to be a juggling act 😂 (I work in a preschool)

And I get the full on children thing, mine are 11 and 7, dd1 is super cuddly and is always touching, fiddling or cuddling up to me, even more so the last few weeks. I'm all touched out by the evening I often take myself upstairs to read alone to have a break! Then dd2 is always talking and jumping around she doesn't stop (unless she's watching lol videos on youtube!) I'm mentally drained by the evening but not sleeping well as I'm not doing as much physically.

Frugal win, some books I had outside for free and no one took I stuck on ebay. They sold for £30 😱 so v happy with that. I then bought some lucy locket shorts and leggings on the half price bank holiday offer!

Thank you people!

Meadow I have had a bad couple of days, even though on the surface of it I am better off (no commute, family now getting the hang of the piss off I am working face, no little ones wanting attention, DD a winner in the A Level lottery, can go out in the country.....). If anyone has it easy it is us.... yet I am still stressed by the lack of autonomy I have. I can't do this or that and being judged and judging people. The lack of choice is stressful - the best I can liken it to is the stress created by lack of economic opportunity. I can see other people doing things I can't.

meadow I spent the first few weeks crying and feeling down. I'm normally quite go with the flow but the complete change in general mood and people on social media made me feel scared. I had IBS attacks (made worse as no toilets open to sort myself out) while shopping as I was so stressed by the whole atmosphere. The uncertainty is quite unsettling, I like to know what is happening and when, I like a plan!! Now I'm trying to take each day as I can, sometimes i need to stay in my pjs and veg out watching endless disney films with dds, others we go for walks and crack on with the schooling or I'm super productive (those days are rare 🤣)

Mine are past the toddler stage so understand it more but some days are really hard, dd2 has had major tantrums as her friends aren't answering zoom calls or she can't find a certain toy! What has helped is we have done garden visits to friends and family. We had a picnic at a local park the other day with my family keeping our rugs separate. Not sure if that something you could do?

Ive namechanged for this
I hope this doesnt offend you em
Your DH doesnt need to help he needs to take equal responsibility for parenting and domestic tasks.
Presumably you work similar hours?
Doesnt he cook anymore?
Food shop ?
Tasks are divided up into responsibilties here so that he cant pull the "I didnt see it" crap.
I agree you have to take the time but I remember that he then moans at you.

Eid Mubarak Meadow. It's ok to feel down and overwhelmed. I recognise a lot of what the others are saying. No space. No gap when no one is talking at you between work and kids - that just totally overwhelms me mentally. I love working at home I really do. I'll happily do it for life. But I don't like doing it with someone else in the house and I don't like trying to parent full time and work full time with no respite. It must be bloody exhausting trying to juggle those things with toddlers who cannot occupy themselves at all.

Unescorted and for you. Only over the hill if needed

Freeze scones you say Life hmm I now know what I'm doing tomorrow as I have some gruyere that needs using.

Wow, the thread has been busy!
I think all the feelings that you all have been articulating are completely understandable in the circumstances. I'm definitely finding it a roller coaster and the most difficult bit for me is the not being able to plan anything ahead, which I always like to do. It's good that we are able to support each other on here. unescorted we are really fortunate too, 2 salaries from safe jobs, plenty of space in the house & garden, easily accessible woodland walks, but still unsettling times.
Em take care of yourself & dh definitely needs to step up, however tired he's feeling.
I've been feeling under the weather for about a week now on & off, nauseous at times and just not quite right. Not sure if it's stress related, will phone the GP if it continues. However I've managed a few ciders over the last couple of nights which have been lovely! Our zoom quiz last night was great fun & made me feel better.
Today I'm going to do more blocks of the 2 quilts I've got on the go, start reading our next book group book which arrived yesterday and generally chill out. Ds is making tea, beef curry, so I don't have to worry about that.

unescorted mini frittatas for snacks (made in bun tins). Great for using up stuff from the fridge & keep for a few days in a tub in the fridge.
Eid mubarak Meadow, hope you are able to enjoy it

Wolf one of many pages on freezing scones but these also seem to give good sourdough advice

www.kingarthurflour.com/blog/2016/05/30/freeze-and-bake-scones

meadow the only doors with locks here are upstairs bathroom and the garage (but the locks on the outside!!)

Also Eid Mubarak!!

lane what sign?

nocuts headphones are the way forwards I think.

mango ordinarily we work similar hours however since lockdown he’s been sort of seconded to a different team and is just helping them out with tasks as and when they ask. So he’s doing the majority of the childcare. He was doing dinners etc. But since he was ill it’s been all down to me. The week he was ill I had no option. He was in bed as had superbly low energy. Ive never seen him that bad before. So I had to do everything because if I didn’t it literally wouldn’t get done. But that was a two weeks ago now. And I’m of the opinion that he should be almost back to pulling his weight. I understand he’s not just going to bounce right back to 100% energy but at least pitch in. And let me know if you’re feeling low energy.

I think with him it’s a massive communication issue. I’m just meant to know when he’s tired.

This morning we were up and out before 9am. Took ds and Dd for a walk - ds took his balance bike. We parked at nursery in our parking space and then walked along the sea front. Got half way and I had intended on a takeaway coffee from my fave beach hut coffee place but they opened at 12. And it was 10...so we turned around and went back to near the car to the waterfront gardens. Found an open coffee place and got coffee £4.40 for two flat whites. I’d packed snack for ds and Dd so they were covered. Ds was cold though because in all the excitement for leaving the house I’d forgotten to put a jumper in for him. So we sat on the grass and he wore my hoody - see pic.

Home and leftover Thai food for lunch.

Mum and dad are apparently popping up this afternoon so a quick tidy up and move the table back into position.

Oops sorry em I forgot to upload it 😂 it was doing the rounds on FB recently

Hahahaha! lane like it.

I’ve said to dh I’m going into the office on Thursday morning. To catch up.

Thanks Life. I think I might do an afternoon tea for dinner tonight.

It must be very difficult when both parents are trying to work from home and have small dc. I know at the beginning of lockdown there were threads about which keyworkers qualified for a school place and it seemed that if you could work from home you didn't. Surely that's only sustainable for a short while and not for months on end though?

em I think the garage sounds like a good place to work could you fit a small bolt on the door?

Hope people don't mind an extra body on the thread.

I'm exceptionally lucky that my job is secure and DH hasn't (yet) been furloughed. And although redundancy letters are doing the rounds at his factory, he hasn't been given one. When they furloughed most of hi factory and kept 8 people on, he was one of the 8, so I think he will be safe from the redundancies.

However, I'm using lockdown as an excuse to spend and buy the barest minmum.

We have had our holiday (over £2k) refunded finally and that's in national savings now, adding to the chance that we will hopefully win something in the draw each month - DH has £40k from his compensation in there and wins £50 most months. I have far less.

I am really begrudging spending money. And aiming for no spend days most days, helped by not being able to go anywhere.

I have spent £8 today though, due to the cat chewing through the wire on my mouse. I'm a teacher, wfh at the moment apart from days we go into the hub school, which are few and far between as we have a big staff to share the load. So I need my laptop up and running properly. It's half term, so no work setting, but I'm still writing my reports etc.

Eid Mubarak Meadow!

I love that sign, Lane

born there’s a bolt on the outside of the internal garage door. I’ve ordered a lap tray/stand thing for laptop so if needs be I can work more comfortably in bed (it’ll also raise laptop up on the table so that’ll help too).

Dparents have just left. Nice to see them and the weather held so we stayed outside.

Welcome Dr. Always room for more.

£15 Wilko, £16 home bargains on frivolous stuff

Made cookies, scones and quiche for tea. We will be very sugar high