Wreck did you mean ‘repetitive’? Glad you are feeling positive Meadow
Lonely I thought you’d been quiet, glad you’re okay
Love I am so sorry you are going through this. I have just been through such a similar scenario and I empathise, I really do. Even down to the parents not pushing hard enough to at least get knowledge /answers. It’s very hard to be a ‘bystander’ who cares so much 
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Em glad you’ve got some help.
Thanks very much for the good wishes yesterday. The funeral was lovely but really hard and I was totally wiped out last night. I did have to stop and steady myself a couple of times through my speech but I made it. And in heels 
. There was a segment about my mum and dad’s relationship though, which was incredibly moving and really made me see them as a couple, and not just two members of my family, and mum’s loss has really hit me now. The celebrant read out the letter that dad left for mum, written just before he had his big surgery a couple of years ago. It was a love letter really, and so wonderful and tender that it has unlocked all sorts of feelings and I keep bursting into tears. I should cry for him though, he was a quirky, kind man who loved and supported us all so completely. A man who had a horrible childhood and yet gave us a such a happy one.
I am trying not to cry in front of the children though as it confuses and slightly alarms them. Dd has been a lovely distraction today. She has just started talking in the last few days - she’s been copying words as we say them and making the ‘right’ animal noises at pictures for a couple of weeks but she’s now saying a few words - mama, (ba)nana, doggy, car (although this is applied liberally to anything with wheels, including DS’s scooter). It’s so cute. She can also point correctly to her head, nose and tummy. She’s like my little performing seal at the moment 