New frugal thread for autumn savings

[SnugglySnerd]

Just filled up the last one. Hope you all find the new one!

Anybody got an actifry or similar? I've heard good things - and if I want things like chips on Slimming World I have to faff around so I think it might be a good investment. I guess it might be more energy efficient than turning my big oven on too, I'll look into that.

Think we might have to start doing something about dd’s anxiety. It’s starting to give her physical symptoms (feeling sick and dizzy). Not sure what to do, will speak to her school nurse who I just so happen to work alongside.

Wreck How old is DD again? Probably a good idea to seek some treatment as you say. Counselling or something might help her? Poor thing. I've had awful anxiety my whole life really and I know how it feels to be a child and feel ill with it but not have it recognised and feel ashamed and not understand what is going on . She is lucky to have you to help her out .

Well tbh today has been a big disappointment. I've had horrendous nausea and bouts of retching on and off all day because I suddenly halved my antidepressant dose over night which was sort of an accident (long story) and silly. Then as I say I dragged us out to an event that isn't on til tomorrow, then came back, then we tried to go out to go volunteering but the weather is that horrendous that my brolly broke and I got very wet and hysterical as I can't deal with the sensory input of heavy rain and wind, so we had to come back home again and as I'm feeling too unwell can't go to my friend's for his birthday. Feeling pretty grim bleurgh.

Whoever said about making their own beer and wine, DH has an uncle who brews his own beers and wines. For his wedding he home-brewed all the beer and wine for it, it was ace!

Seacow I've never even heard of an actifry . I bet your curls look lovely, try not to worry .

I have an Phillips air fryer seacow . Although my only thing i’ve cooked in it so far is sweet potato fries. But you don’t need oil as they come out nice but sometimes I add a couple of squirts of that oil that’s only 1 calorie per squirt. Mmmmm

Poor DD wreck

meadow be kind to yourself. You’ve taken on a full time job which you were worried about coping with and now pregnant which is exhausting by itself. A bit of rest sounds in order .

Good to hear about the maternity pay. Did your DH manage to start his job yet?

Ah meadow sorry you’ve had a tough day dd is 7. I’m not sure what I can do though, we can’t afford anything privately and I know that there wouldn’t be any nhs help for her. She’s doing well at school too. I’m just worried we won’t be able to get her any help until it’s too late. School nurses don’t get training on mental health but I know she will help if she can. She has 22 schools to look after though and I would hate to take her away from the children with really serious issues.

Definitely worth trying to get her some help. Hopefully as you have an 'in' it might help IYSWIM. DD's school did fuck all because she was masking everything all day (not that I'm bitter or anything :o). But the more help they get the better

Wreck my 5 year old DD suffers from anxiety sometimes. What really helps her is doing some of those children’s meditation exercises. There was one app called “sitting still” which was brilliant, it was aimed at teenagers but the exercises were perfect for her, especially the “body scan” and “worries” ones.

Hope you manage to find something that helps. I know how worrying it can be.

One my friend told me is 54321, a mindfulness thing where they have to name in order:
5 things they can see
4 things they can hear
3 things they can touch
2 things they can smell
1 thing they can taste

Does work with DD to calm her down sometimes as it takes the focus off the worry onto finding stuff for the list

wreck I’m not sure how old dd is but maybe download headspace. The first 10 meditations are free after that you have to pay. But they’ve helped me.

Is there a yoga class or meditation class dd could attend? Either with or without you?

Dh has packed me off to bed in the spare room. I’m feeling a bit sore throaty/coldy. I have catface two blankets plus duvet, hot water bottle, a ton of water, a lemsip and paracetamol for if I need them in the night.

Dh is on sole ds duty tonight. We bought formula a while ago and are mix feeding. So bottles are ready to go. I’ve fed ds his last bf feed for today. He’s sleeping now. Yay.

I suspect im feeling crappy because a) hormones b) tired and c) trying too hard to be perfect at thisbaby malarkey

Have been prescribed sleep so that’s the plan.

em I might come across as a holier than thou breast feeder, but in all honesty, you're probably doing the right thing. With having to go back to work so soon, it is a complete and total nightmare and desperate worry if you have an ebf baby who will not entertain a bottle or any kind of formula. I could bf endlessly, but a mechanical milk machine I was not, so expressing was out. My babies refused all bottles and formula, and trust me, it's exhausting. And I didn't have to couldn't go back to work. Sleep well.

sunny I thought of you today, and hoped you had a good day. Glad you did

Ds is still up. He's decided that falling asleep is now to be done in the living room, on dp. I'm hiding out upstairs (we both slept through f1 qualifying) and will carry the lump up once he's asleep.

Nsd for me, but filling my amazon basket with Christmas bits again.

Not caught up today yet but just wanted to say Cag lots of love and calm vibes for tomorrow, hope it goes well xxx

Can't believe how quickly we are going through threads at the moment Whose turn is it to start the next one?!

Meadow go easy on yourself, you need to rest

Wreck there is a book called 'what to do when you worry too much' or similar that I got for dd when she was struggling, it was helpful. The biggest thing to help with anxiety is to find ways of boosting confidence, which is easier said than done i know.

Cag good luck for today, I will be thinking of you xxx

Em a decent nights sleep sounds perfect, enjoy.

Well done Sunny glad it went well.

We made it back from Bristol, the weather was scary driving home but o.kay otherwise. War Horse was mind blowingly amazing, incredible and very moving, dd found it a bit scary in parts but enjoyed it over all.

Having a quick hot chocolate now before bed.

£4.50 parking.

Good luck today Cag. Hope all goes smoothly.

Just going to catch up on thread. Had a busy day yesterday. Spent £30 on cat litter and £18 on an Xmas gift for one of the dc.

YNAB???

DP away so took DDs out for a windy walk and stopped in cafe. £10.15. I was meant to get other stuff in town but forgot, so saved money through absent-mindedness

Plan was to make use of our national trust cards today, but atm the rain is lashing against the window (hence early up) so it's not looking very inviting...

today's the day Cag? Very best of luck x

wreck my ds and I are dealing with the same, but we can afford private treatment and are doing that just now. Would it help to share what we're learning? The things they are doing are:

Talking through specific worries to find out what the problems are, and get it off our chest and think of practical solutions.

Talk about ways to calm down in the moment if things get tricky. This is very much along the lines of the 54321 thing that cag mentions or we do football commentary where we just look round and name what we can see, or name everything of a certain colour. It shuts down the imagination and grounds us in reality which really help with getting the mostly imaginary fears to buzz off just for a little while.

I'm also trying really hard to capitalise on those parts of our lives that are fullfilling and easy for us. So Beavers for ds and myself and my invention project for me, and the play dates that ds loves. Just generally I am trying to concentrate hard on those things that are good and to be kind of dismissive of the importance of those things that are not (PE and elegant social skills and stuff)

In our case I think there is a mild deficit in social skill that the professionals are trying to define in detail, in the hope that we will be under less stress if the actual problem is defined. I have an idea that your dd has more clearly defined challenges, which may or may not help.

Oddly we have also found a sport called footgolf that is doing us all a world of good. It basically involves kicking a football round a golf course and requires no skill and no speed.

These are the things that are helping us. Hope that helps.

Girlie thanks for the book title, I've ordered that.

Argh cag!! Good luck! With ds I had the pessary and started contracting 20 hours later then it was a nice smooth three hour labour.

Em I hope you enjoyed your sleep I agree that you’re doing the best thing

Thanks for all the comments re dd I will look into it all. Mil is a chronic illness recovery practitioner so she is also helpful.

Today will be spendy as going to London

Thanks sunny I think you’re right. It’s all about accepting your worries but not letting them take over.

You Need A Budget Grumpy
Its a tool for managing money and was highly recommended but I found it baffling

Wreck if your MIL has any tips. I'd be glad to hear them too. She sounds like a very useful person.

One other thing that I realised yesterday is that seeing photos and videoes of myself helps a lot. I find it easier to understand myself when I see myself through photos and videos, than I can from the inside iykwim.

Yesterday I could see from the photos that I am more worried looking on the outside than I feel on the inside, and so I am adjusting my face a bit. Oddly, when I adjust my face to look less worried, I then feel more calm on the inside. That sounds odd, but perhaps you will figure out what I mean.

I know what you mean sunny I'm always getting told "don't look so worried" in various situations and I'm sat there thinking errrm I'm actually fine 😂

Although not so much this morning, have spoken to antenatal and they want me in ASAP!!! Eeeeek off we go!

Good luck cag. Sending you engaged baby and ready cervix vibes.
Em, hope you feel better today. You are doing a fab job. Maybe lower your standards which is easier said than done but takes the perfect pressure off.
Wreck sorry to hear dd is anxious. Hope the technique help and you can get some NHS intervention.

Have to get some bits from sainsbury today for fil who is still in hospital and something for Sunday roast.

I’ve done a new thread can’t link on app. In the usual place, see you there!