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Original poster

Parents want me to do and kids to do covid test before visiting

550 replies

Needarest22 · 22/12/2022 12:51

AIBU for being a bit put out by this?
My brother is also visiting and he's really cautious about covid so it could be driven by him. There is no talk of them doing one.
AIBU to be a bit miffed?

OP posts:
stopthebarking · 22/12/2022 16:48

At some point they're going to have to relax a bit, if they want to see their grandchildren on a regular basis. That point has been reached by most, unless there are special circumstances. Unless they're willing to pay for the tests (the non-swab type), I'd be very annoyed at the request.

Hellybelly84 · 22/12/2022 16:50

JohnPrescottsPyjamas · 22/12/2022 16:10

I think some posters need to read Hancock’s The Pandemic Diaries. Then you’ll realise just how much nonsense we were told about covid and mitigation methods - from the horse’s mouth! How much political posturing went on regarding masks, tests, vaccines and infection control - all from the man himself. Just how many other sufferers of potentially fatal illnesses were sacrificed on the altar of the ‘Covid NHS’ and how so many are now paralysed by irrational fear of one specific virus, when there are actually many others we need to be just as, if not more, aware of.

As others have said. Don’t go. If their fear, anxiety and vulnerability is so high, having children who can be carriers of all sorts of bugs will not help. The tests might be negative but you could still be carrying Strep A, norovirus, flu or even a cold. It’s their health and well being, so their choice, but they shouldn’t be expecting others to test if they don’t want to. Hospitals aren’t even asking visitors to test are they?

Agree completely. Im friends with nurses, teachers and many other friends who work in offices and around lots of people and not one of them routinely tests anymore.

It is frightening what 2 years of scaremongering and false facts have done to some people.

Pelo22 · 22/12/2022 16:50

My dad still tests before seeing me (my tests are free so he does one of those)
He also cancelled a meet up last week as he was streaming with a cold

Wrongsideofpennines · 22/12/2022 16:56

Currently lying in bed feeling like crap having been throwing up for the last 12 hours because of covid. Had a cough for a week or more too. I really wouldn't want anyone in my family to catch this. Just do the test, and make sure they do one too.

Icecreamandapplepie · 22/12/2022 16:58

Oh just don't bloody go then.

You haven't engaged with any of the numerous posts suggesting you're being awkward and selfish when it means so much to your parents.

So what if they haven't taken one? They don't go anywhere because they have health anxiety! Rational or not it's how they feel.
Where would the world be if we all wouldn't put ourselves out slightly for one another?

This is one of the most unbelievably awful threads I've ever seen on here.

JustLyra · 22/12/2022 17:02

It is frightening what 2 years of scaremongering and false facts have done to some people.

Its frightening how far people have gone the other way and now happily inflict coughs, colds and flu on other people all in tbt mindset of “it’s not covid, and we need to get back to normal”

it’s actually less safe now for people like my DD (and the elderly) because so many people give less fucks than they ever have.

BCBird · 22/12/2022 17:04

Lie? Shocking? Surely if u all do a rest you can relax knowing that you have taken as many precautions as possible?. No point some doing tests if others don't.

Megifer · 22/12/2022 17:07

WestwardHo1 · 22/12/2022 16:18

It's like being in 2020 again! Have the last two years not happened? The "so selfish" mantra is still being bleated.

We KNOW testing isn't accurate. We know masks do very little to limit the spread.

Yet people still cling to the idea.

What if the OP and her family do all produce a negative test, but her parents get Covid anyway in the next few weeks as is reasonably likely?

Show quote history

What if an iced covid turd falls out of a plane into their front room?

If they get covid anyway at least ops conscience can be reasonably clear.

Togoodtobeforgotten · 22/12/2022 17:08

Needarest22 · 22/12/2022 15:40

In answer to the OP, if they are particularly concerned and have identified you and yours but nobody else as the likely disease carriers here, I don't think I'd go. Reason being that if they do end up getting ill with anything at all, they're liable to blame you for it. It's not so much the covid test that's the issue as the general attitude surrounding it.

Yes I think you have articulated the crux of it.

That wasn't the crux of it at all, you were miffed they asked you to do a test and then it would be quite spiteful if you diddnt go, I can't actually believe how childish you are being over a covid test.

venus7 · 22/12/2022 17:11

MelchiorsMistress · 22/12/2022 12:59

Just tell them you’ve done it and it was fine.

That's really considerate and reasonable.

Togoodtobeforgotten · 22/12/2022 17:12

stopthebarking · 22/12/2022 16:48

At some point they're going to have to relax a bit, if they want to see their grandchildren on a regular basis. That point has been reached by most, unless there are special circumstances. Unless they're willing to pay for the tests (the non-swab type), I'd be very annoyed at the request.

Why? because you say so?

girlmom21 · 22/12/2022 17:15

Needarest22 · 22/12/2022 16:11

From reading the OPs posts, I don't think it said anywhere that the parents and brother were not going to test - just that the OP and her family were more likely to be at risk because they have been out and about more.

I can guarantee they won't test because they think they are "clean".

Have you asked them?

Original poster
Needarest22 · 22/12/2022 17:25

That wasn't the crux of it at all, you were miffed they asked you to do a test and then it would be quite spiteful if you diddnt go, I can't actually believe how childish you are being over a covid test.

Mind reader are you?! I know my own thoughts and feelings better than you.

OP posts:
LBFseBrom · 22/12/2022 17:25

I don't know why you are miffed, it's not an unreasonable request and is not going to kill you to test.

WestwardHo1 · 22/12/2022 17:26

Untitledsquatboulder · 22/12/2022 16:45

Then they can relax safe in the knowledge that they've done a they can to prevent it.

Show quote history

So it's more for their feelings than any practical purpose?

EmmaAgain22 · 22/12/2022 17:26

Needarest22 · 22/12/2022 15:47

My concern also is that the tests are not failsafe and so we could quite easily pass on a strain of covid or a flu or a cough. Perhaps it's better we don't go at all.

Agree

I initially just thought they would test as well.

I've had pneumonia a few weeks ago, and a few people in my block of flats had it.

the problem you have now is that if they get anything, and there's tons going round, they will think it's the interaction with you.

on that basis, I'd not go. I had one friend who wanted to test, I have tests because mum was in a care home recently. But when someone is that anxious, it's too risky. she doesn't go out so will blame me if she gets anything.

Original poster
Needarest22 · 22/12/2022 17:27

Oh just don't bloody go then.

You haven't engaged with any of the numerous posts suggesting you're being awkward and selfish when it means so much to your parents.

So what if they haven't taken one? They don't go anywhere because they have health anxiety! Rational or not it's how they feel.
Where would the world be if we all wouldn't put ourselves out slightly for one another?

This is one of the most unbelievably awful threads I've ever seen on here.

Okkkkay then. 🙄

OP posts:
Sarah2891 · 22/12/2022 17:28

There are some real arseholes in this thread. Suggesting someone lie about testing is disgusting. I'm very vulnerable so my brother and nephew test before visiting, they have no problem with that as they are decent humans.

RosetteNebula · 22/12/2022 17:28

Yeah fuck that. It would be a no from me.

WestwardHo1 · 22/12/2022 17:30

Megifer · 22/12/2022 17:07

What if an iced covid turd falls out of a plane into their front room?

If they get covid anyway at least ops conscience can be reasonably clear.

Show quote history

So if your parent/s got Covid in the next couple of weeks, and you had seen them recently and not taken a test (because you hadn't been ill) you'd be self flagellating in case your parent/s (or whoever) might have caught Covid from you, which you might have been carrying without your knowledge?

Is this how people are operating nowadays?

LuckySantangelo35 · 22/12/2022 17:33

stopthebarking · 22/12/2022 16:48

At some point they're going to have to relax a bit, if they want to see their grandchildren on a regular basis. That point has been reached by most, unless there are special circumstances. Unless they're willing to pay for the tests (the non-swab type), I'd be very annoyed at the request.

@stopthebarking

im sure they’ll relax when the rates of infection aren’t sky high as they are now

plus not everyone wants to prioritise seeing the grandkids above all else including their own health and that of their spouses. And that’s fair enough.

LuckySantangelo35 · 22/12/2022 17:33

RosetteNebula · 22/12/2022 17:28

Yeah fuck that. It would be a no from me.

@RosetteNebula

good for you 👍

C8H10N4O2 · 22/12/2022 17:36

Needarest22 · 22/12/2022 17:25

That wasn't the crux of it at all, you were miffed they asked you to do a test and then it would be quite spiteful if you diddnt go, I can't actually believe how childish you are being over a covid test.

Mind reader are you?! I know my own thoughts and feelings better than you.

Then you are not conveying them effectively.

You said up thread that your brother will isolate and your parents are not mixing. If you isolate for the requisite time then you won't need to do a test either, if you don't isolate then do the tests. If your father has a bad chest then its even more important.

It doesn't matter if they are vaccinated up to the hilt - vaccines have transformed life with covid but you can still be unlucky or have a poor response if your immune system is poor.

We have a health system barely operating - anyone visiting the old or the health compromised should test before visiting.

RosetteNebula · 22/12/2022 17:36

@LuckySantangelo35 Thanks 😊

Don't see the point of your comment though. OP has asked for opinions and I've stated mine. Your goady response to my comment adds nothing to the discussion.

WestwardHo1 · 22/12/2022 17:36

Rates of infection are not "sky high".