AIBU : unvaxxed friend moaning about covid

[UnicyclingBabies]

My friend has covid. Her husband and her kids have covid. They are not seriously ill thank goodness, but they're feeling pretty rough and finding it hard and inconvenient to be stuck inside feeling unwell and have all the hassle of Test and Trace etc

Every day she posts on social media moaning about it. I get that it's not fun for her, but I know loads of people who've had covid (including some who were hospitalised) and none of them seemed to need to complain so publicly. The kicker is, she and all her family are unvaccinated. AIBU to feel irritated?

I know of doctors saying most of the people they're treating for covid are unvaccinated. Clearly it's doing some good if you think in many ways we're back to normal compared to a lot of last year and it's not ripping along like it was.

[quote Remmy123]@ButtonSister I know more vaccinated people with covid then I did pre-vaccine.[/quote]
That's because before the vaccine was rolled out lockdown and distancing measures were more stringent.

It is a free society but frankly I would rather not be paying through my taxes to treat someone who is responsible for their condition

But where's the line?
If someone chooses to smoke, drink heavily- would you not want your taxes to help them if their health suffers?
If someone is obese- what about then? How about someone who is stuck in a domestic violence situation, and can't /won't leave? Do they deserve help?

Yabu. You dont sound like her friend.

I'm with you OP. Yes, I know quite a few people who have been vaccinated who have since caught covid. None very badly, some with few symptoms. It's clear that having the vaccine makes the illness less severe in many cases and I really don't understand why some people are so vehemently against it without a medical reason to be. It's hardly the same as some who has lived an unhealthy life style for years having a coronary. It's hard to break bad habits, easy to spend a few minutes getting a free jab.

But I'd stop reading her FB page if I were you.

@hopeful777 You summed it up perfectly.

YABU and as a PP said you're not a friend. If you'd be sympathetic if she was vaccinated then you might want to consider what it says about you that you only extend sympathy to those who make the same medical and political choices as you. It's a slippery slope when you start splitting people into those worthy of sympathy and compassion, and those not.

I know more vaccinated people with covid then I did pre-vaccine

Of course you do. 90-odd percent of the country is vaccinated.

But at the same time Covid restrictions are pretty much gone, deaths have gone down. Why do you think that is? Ah. Because the stats prove you're 32 times more likely to die from Covid if you're unvaccinated. Thirty. Two. Times.

Being vaccinated does not stop 100% of people getting ill with covid, but it will stop a good proportion of people ill. YANBU OP - hopefully your friend may consider getting the vaccine in the future.

It’s worrying that so many people think they’re not going to get covid because they’re vaccination.
It is indeed, my Dsis is really sick 6 weeks double vaccinated.

30 day snooze function if it’s FB.

@EmeraldShamrock

It’s worrying that so many people think they’re not going to get covid because they’re vaccination. It is indeed, my Dsis is really sick 6 weeks double vaccinated.

However unwell she is it's likely she would have been worse with no vaccine. ICU or dead even.

[quote Remmy123]@ButtonSister I know more vaccinated people with covid then I did pre-vaccine.[/quote]
A very obvious reason for this and it's not that vaccines are ineffective.

When the rate of vaccine is high, as it is here fortunately, then this will always be the case.

And the reality is that when fully vaccines you are less likely to catch it and, even more importantly. Less likely to be seriously ill with it if you do.

Not sure why people try to minimise the effectiveness tbh.

Yabu. Would it be ok if she complained if she had been vaccinated? Vaccinated people can get covid too.

Thanks everyone for your replies. No, I certainly don't think she deserves to have covid, as one poster siggested. And I do have sympathy for her situation. I'm sorry she has covid and I hope they all feel better soon. But she is testing my compassion with her behaviour: having made a very clear choice that made this outcome more likely, and then making numerous posts asking for sympathy (as the family didn't all fall ill on the same day it has literally been weeks of posting about it). I really would not feel the same way if she had made her choice and accepted the consequences quietly. I do respect people's right to not be vaccinated, but it's also hard to overlook the fact that choice affects all of us as covid does transmit more easily among unvaccinated people.

The posters who said I should just snooze her, you're correct. I will do this now.
The posters who suggest I'm not a very good friend are also correct. We were not close so I'm sure this won't be any kind of loss to her, but I realise I have lost respect for her over this and think the best thing to do is step back.

Thanks all for your thoughts which I appreciate.

YABU. She's allowed to complain whether or not she's vaccinated. It's likely most of us will catch Covid at some point regardless of our vaccination status.

Is this a friend or just an acquaintance? Just unfriend her.

[quote Remmy123]@ButtonSister I know more vaccinated people with covid then I did pre-vaccine.[/quote]
Well of course you do as pre-vaccine you couldnt have known anyone!

Why is the message about this not getting through, if we go to say 99% jabbed nearly everyone who has covid would be vaccinated. The point is that there are fewer seriously ill and dying

How do people not know that?

@bumbleymummy

Yabu. Would it be ok if she complained if she had been vaccinated? Vaccinated people can get covid too.

I know seat belts are often used an analogy but here I think it has some parallels

Wearing a seat belt won't stop you having a car accident but would you really not feel anymore sympathy for a friend who was wearing one when they had an accident that one who choose not to bother? I'm not saintly enough to feel that way.

YANBU

But people still aren’t able to grasp that vaccines are not a miracle cure, they are a harm minimisation tool.

And lots of people will pile on here to tell you that the vaccinated are a bigger risk than the unvaccinated (which is the current trope from the antivaxxers), and that it’s “her body, her choice”. The rallying cry of the ignorant.

You aren’t unsympathetic towards someone who had a heart attack because they had a high fat, low exercise lifestyle; or to a person with lung cancer because of their smoking history.

Well, to be honest, I am more sympathetic to those who have looked after their heart health/not smoked.

**Many people are less sympathetic to those with self inflicted illnesses.

It is a free society but frankly I would rather not be paying through my taxes to treat someone who is responsible for their condition.**

^This.

Even if she had the vaccine she could of still got ill and caught covid so I don't know what you're so upset about?

@Findingthelight1

I know more vaccinated people with covid then I did pre-vaccine

Of course you do. 90-odd percent of the country is vaccinated.

But at the same time Covid restrictions are pretty much gone, deaths have gone down. Why do you think that is? Ah. Because the stats prove you're 32 times more likely to die from Covid if you're unvaccinated. Thirty. Two. Times.

It’s not the same across the board - it’s very dependent on age. That study included data from the start of the year when very few people had been vaccinated - so all the elderly/vulnerable who were most likely to die were unvaccinated. A young, healthy unvaccinated person is not 32 times more likely to die than a vaccinated over 60 with underlying health conditions.