Child positive - adults socialise as normal?

[tactum]

Child did positive lateral flow yest am. Us and she booked in for PCR this am. If she comes back positive and the adults come back negative would you literally continue as you had planned or not?
We both wfh so that's no problem, have a large house and she's a teenager so perfectly capable of isolating from us/using kitchen at a different time/leave food outside her door.

But we have a couple of social events arranged over the next 10 days - not at our house - at a pub etc with friends, which have been looked forward to for a long time. If we did negative lateral flow tests on that day would you still go? Our friends will know child is positive. Will they be judging us? Is it unacceptable? Everyone is double jabbed and not vulnerable.

We have adjusted behaviour in that my cousin was supposed to be coming to stay here this weekend and now isn't, and I won't be visiting my vulnerable dad at all.

What do people think? I know what the guidelines say - we can do what we like - but what is 'socially acceptable?' (I realise there is a very wide range of opinion here on risk etc!)

It’s unacceptable and I would judge you. Even if your friends are ok with it what about other people in the pub? For the sake of 10 days could you not do the socially responsible thing and stay at home?
Yes, it’s “probably” fine if DC is isolating from you and you’re really careful at home and you have a negative lateral flow but in your position I wouldn’t feel good about myself knowing I had “probably” not given anyone covid.

When teenage dd tested positive, we decided to isolate with her so that we didn't pass it on. Cancelled social plans etc.

I haven't been out of the house since except for my own pcr tests. It's a good thing too as I developed symptoms and tested positive a few days later. I'd have felt awful if I had exposed anyone.

I wouldn’t try to make my teenager completely isolate from me so that I could go to some social events.

Disregarding that point though, I personally wouldn’t mind if friends came out with me in your position. You have already made sensible choices by avoiding vulnerable people.

We are in a similar position. DD tested positive on a LFT yesterday. We are now awaiting PCR results. If that comes back positive, we will take a pragmatic approach. So do the things you have to do but scale back the things you don't.

DS will still go to school. Both dh and I work from home and I will move all my work online. And it will be a no to unnecessary social activities. Just because I can, doesn't mean I should.

Oh and my DD is slightly younger than your DD so won't be self isolating from us.

Ask the people you are seeing. Me and my friends carry on as normal but thats us, i wouldn't judge you, you're negative you can carry on

DD never tested pairing on lateral but did on pcr. It also took me 3 pcrs to test positive. Assume you are infectious . And don't quarantine your child from you ! It's not a nice illness to be alone with .

Also I am double jabbed and not vulnerable and have been quite unwell- as is dd.

They really need to bring back close contact isolation as the tests are not that accurate .

I wouldn't judge you as such, but I would prefer to postpone the meeting so ask your friends. They may prefer to meet for a walk or something else outdoors and keep the pub for a later date.

We are in the middle of covid here...... a few things I've learnt.....
Please don't make your child isolate. One of mine was really mentally affected. Thought covid equalled death. Was very up and down for a few days.
Lfts are inaccurate. One DS was negative on numerous lfts. Positive pcr though.
Don't assume you've escaped it. DH and I got it Day 10 of second child's isolation.

I think if you are an essential worker yes carry on going and negative kids going to school but everyone who has covid at home should minimise mixing.

In my covid state I've not made my post clear....
I mean child isolation from family in the house. Let the child be with the family.

And mixing, I mean non essential mixing. Postpone it for a month.

It's really up to you to decide so long as it's within the guidelines.

Would you be happy if a friend went to the pub with you who had tested negative but their DC tested positive.

We cancelled events like that for us and siblings under the same circumstances.

@Justwingingit2005

In my covid state I've not made my post clear.... I mean child isolation from family in the house. Let the child be with the family.

And mixing, I mean non essential mixing. Postpone it for a month.

My DS 15 is isolating in his room but that's mainly because he's quite ill with Covid so he's not mixing with the rest of us.

I'd not turn up to the social event if I knew you were planning on being there. So, I guess you should cancel.

I would go to the supermarket for a weekly shop, unless I could get a delivery.

So, I would limit my interactions with people, but not put the family through weird freezer combinations for the last few days, because I would go shopping for necessities, but not for a new pair of jeans that I fancied.

When DS had it we scaled back to just outside walks for us and school (who oked it) for DD alongside LFT tests for us.

Social indoor events - we would have cancelled.

Dd had it in the summer so we all had to isolate and she kept away from us so we could still go on holiday once she was out. She was fine with that and didn’t want to mix with us anyway! But it was that boiling week so we were in the garden a lot anyway.
My friend recently said her dh had covid so I asked to switch lunch to a walk as I was going to a wedding. Personally I’d gauge the feelings of your friends if your dd is happily tucked in her room.
We have the opposite now though, all the rest of us have it and dd is off to school every day!

Maltesebubs

My 15 yr old isolates when healthy 🤣 its like he's embarrassed to sit and watch TV with us 🤣

I just meant I don't understand these people who shut kids away with covid.

I did limit what I was doing when ds2 had it. Although I did go to a wedding on day 9 of his isolation. I had caught covid off the bride about 6 weeks before though!

The law says you don't have to isolate, the guidance doesn't actually say therefore do what you like - it actually says you should consider limiting non essential social contact. So go to work, go to school, but think about whether it's necessary to go to the pub. Honestly I'd probably judge, yes.

If I was the friend that you are due to meet up with I’d appreciate being told that your child has had a positive test result, and given me the option of postponing.
I’d also be much happier if you had taken a lat flow test regardless of injection status.
I’d much rather be meeting up with a close contact of a positive test result who had had no injections but taken a flow test then somebody who had received both injections but not taken a flow test and could be infecting others without knowing.

Yep, I get you all, thanks. One of the events was a band in a pub with about 30 friends and randoms, so that's clearly not going to happen. The other event is just 6 and we'll be upfront with them and see what they want to do - switch to a walk, leave it etc. Definitely the right approach.

Re the child isolation thing - we did that with DS last year when he got it and he was fine, DD is absolutely fine with it too - both are older teens and v resilient - and as someone said, tend to self isolate by nature! I'm certainly not leaving a traumatised/crying child behind a closed door and ignoring their needs!!!

12 months ago, I'd have said - absolutely unacceptable, stay home. But now, with so many adults doubled-vaxxed and the virus not going anywhere, I think very differently. DH has been isolating with Covid in the past 2 weeks and in that time I've been to the cinema and a gig. Negative LFT and masked of course, but no guilt about going.

When my DC has a positive LF and we were awaiting his PCR result I went and did a huge shop so we could stay home as much as possible from that point onwards.
Cancelled everything non essential. OH still going to work as negative and no symptoms but other than that staying home.

My dd1 tested positive yesterday and dd2 has a raging temp. I will go to work but I’ve already cancelled social things. I know it’s not the current rules but it feels like the right thing to do.