Child positive - adults socialise as normal?

[tactum]

Child did positive lateral flow yest am. Us and she booked in for PCR this am. If she comes back positive and the adults come back negative would you literally continue as you had planned or not?
We both wfh so that's no problem, have a large house and she's a teenager so perfectly capable of isolating from us/using kitchen at a different time/leave food outside her door.

But we have a couple of social events arranged over the next 10 days - not at our house - at a pub etc with friends, which have been looked forward to for a long time. If we did negative lateral flow tests on that day would you still go? Our friends will know child is positive. Will they be judging us? Is it unacceptable? Everyone is double jabbed and not vulnerable.

We have adjusted behaviour in that my cousin was supposed to be coming to stay here this weekend and now isn't, and I won't be visiting my vulnerable dad at all.

What do people think? I know what the guidelines say - we can do what we like - but what is 'socially acceptable?' (I realise there is a very wide range of opinion here on risk etc!)

You're right to check with your friends.

When my DH was positive and isolating from me I asked my friends if it was OK to join them outside (my own PCR and LFTs were negative) They thought I was weird bringing my own chair so I wasn't squished up on a picnic bench next to them.

Other than that I went out for quiet dog walks and work asked me to stay home.

We are the opposite here. I have it but my kids & husband don’t. My husband took them the the park and the farm this weekend plus my elder to her swimming lessons as normal 🤷🏼‍♀️ Pretty boring for them if they have to stay at home just cos I’m ill. In fact, better they get out the house as less chance of getting from me!

@tactum - even the 6 may feel 'put on the spot'

I don't think there is anything wrong with you socialising with friends if they know about your child and are happy to see you but I think going to the pub and mixing with other people is a bit irresponsible tbh.

I'd probably check but in theory its fine. My colleague at work his wife is positive, should he come in? - well he should and no one wants him to- we can work from home. I do understand though this cannot go on forever.

Ive thought about this and I wouldn't isolate entirely, but I probably wouldn't meet up with friends either. Id still go to work (no wfh option), food shopping and take the non infected kids out for walks etc though.

We’re in this situation atm as dd tested positive. We are actually keeping other dd home from school because we can easily homeschool for a few days - 1 of us has to be home to look after dd1 as too young to be left alone. Fwiw all the cases in their school atm can be traced back to dc who came in when family members were ill with it at home already. No ones fault, they were just following guidance but we don’t want to subject anyone else to 10 days isolation if we can help it.

DH & I will go to work because we can’t wfh (but obviously sharing childcare half & half between us).

Dd2 (negative so far) won’t be doing any of her clubs etc as again, she could easily be incubating & it just doesn’t seem fair to potentially pass it to others when we know it’s in the house. So no, we won’t be doing social stuff.

I carried on as normal when dh and dd tested positive. Ds went to school too.

Skip the large event and be honest with the smaller group. If you can meet at someone's house rather than a public place, and thus not potentially be transmitting COVID to people you're not actually planning to socialise with, then that would be much more responsible. And make it clear when you speak to the smaller group that you will take absolutely no offence whatsoever if they want to cancel. In fact, maybe phrase it as, 'We could well be infectious so don't think we should go ahead'. Then if they say, 'Nah, we're not worried, come round anyway' then you haven't placed any pressure on them.

Everyone's personal risk level and perception of COVID is different. Clinically vulnerable friends who couldn't get vaccinated or for whom it is unlikely to have worked? Obviously they're not going to want to see you. Double-vaccinated healthy young(ish) friends who tested positive themselves a couple of months ago? Probably not going to care as they are incredibly unlikely to catch it again any time soon.

I am the last one in our household not to have tested positive; DD got a positive result back on Monday and DH this morning. I'm going to go and do a food shop later with an FFP2 mask on but otherwise I will self-isolate even though legally I don't have to. Because I know it's only a matter of time before I test positive too. Luckily I can WFH perfectly well after 18 months of enforced WFH and my colleagues don't want me anywhere near them right now so I have been told to stay here and absolutely NOT to come in!

And I won't be doing any socialising at all for the next 10+ days, even if friends say it's fine. It just doesn't feel like the right thing to do when COVID is literally all over our house. I personally don't mind a phone call or Zoom chat anyway, it's far less hassle than actually having to go out.

Oh and your friends will probably thank you for helping them to avoid the irritating Test & Trace phone call when you inevitably test positive and have to name them as contacts!

I was right there giving my contact details when DH got his call this morning. So they could phone me separately, later on, to tell me I'd been in close contact with a positive case. And I got a separate phone call from T&T to say that my daughter had tested positive - well no shit, I booked her test and took her for the test and it was my contact details on her test booking and I handled her T&T contact-gathering phone call. So I already knew I was a close contact. Because of all that, and because SHE'S MY DAUGHTER.

Waste of time and public money!

Hmm I dunno
I know it’s not the rules anymore but I have been effectively isolating for 10 days as a close contact, apart from taking kids to school.
Have not gone to after school activities or some activities I go to where there are older people. Have worked from home.
I know it’s not a requirement but the vaccine clearly isn’t stopping people from getting it even if it is keeping it mild.

I would skip a social event. TBH, I don't think I'd enjoy it.

I would do a PCR test rather than lateral flow.

If you are double jabbed, you don't need to isolate but should be strict with 'hands, face, space'.

@Bobholll

We are the opposite here. I have it but my kids & husband don’t. My husband took them the the park and the farm this weekend plus my elder to her swimming lessons as normal 🤷🏼‍♀️ Pretty boring for them if they have to stay at home just cos I’m ill. In fact, better they get out the house as less chance of getting from me!

I’m the same. DH will be taking the kids out for the day at the weekend so that I can catch up on some rest as i’m having to recover and look after them at the same time while he works. He will only go to a park or farm that’s outside but they need some fresh air and I need the break.

Ask your friends. When I was a close contact of a positive case I still saw some people who were happy to see me. I avoided vulnerable friends / relatives entirely even though they still wanted to meet up. I continued to go to work every day and just tried to maintain a distance from colleagues / kids. As it turned out I never caught covid so my precautions were a waste of time.

I think it depends.

My dd tested positive and I was pretty much ordered into work because my pcr and lat flows were negative, I did a lat flow everyday and obviously didn't get any symptoms.

Younger dc so unable to isolate and a small house.
We didn't catch it.
Another dc caught it but not off dc1! They got it about two weeks after!
Again told to work etc... Did pcr but this time we had an event booked.
We went to the event, doing lat flows but mainated our distance from people etc.

We didn't catch it second time around either.

Where I work there are tons of people, no masks etc so for me it feels back to normal and putting masks on in super markets feel strange now.
Odd because I felt very vulnerable when masks were first dropped in supermarket.

I think the fact you’ve said you won’t be visiting your vulnerable dad sort of says what you should do.

My husband had to go to work when our sons PCR came back positive. His boss called everyone in on the day that self isolating for fully vaxxed came in. So on that basis I wouldnt judge you.

The reality is that you have no idea who is out and about legally getting on with life with covid in their house hold. The people working in the pub could have a covid positive child at home.

@IncessantNameChanger - you have it bang on. My husband is away today & tomorrow doing client visits with work, work insist that he carries on as normal. He’s staying in a hotel, eating in restaurants, going into offices. He’s not telling anyone he’s spent the last 7 days at home with a covid case 🤷🏼‍♀️ He suggested he should do & his boss said absolutely not.

My teenage cousin similarly worked in a restaurant/pub while his entire household had covid. He works the bar so would be chatting to people all evening, they don’t wear masks anymore either!

It's a difficult one, but in your shoes we cancelled everything that wasn't essential (including kids clubs which I felt bad about). I would have felt uncomfortable carrying on as usual.

@Burnamer

It’s unacceptable and I would judge you. Even if your friends are ok with it what about other people in the pub? For the sake of 10 days could you not do the socially responsible thing and stay at home? Yes, it’s “probably” fine if DC is isolating from you and you’re really careful at home and you have a negative lateral flow but in your position I wouldn’t feel good about myself knowing I had “probably” not given anyone covid.

I agree. Half my family tested positive, the other half, (dd and I) did not . We stayed home mainly, only left the house once a day to walk dog quickly and well away from any people.

Sounds like work is covered, so no need to worry about that. In regards to anything else, for me the right thing to do would be to avoid shops and I certainly wouldn't be mixing with my family or friends as I wouldn't want to pass it onto them, not knowing how they'd be.

Its ok people saying its irresponsible etc but I would be expected to go to work if negative pcr and no symptoms even if ds had covid

And many will be going go work who work in pubs / restaurants etc

Id meet people outside and socially distance