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Covid

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Original poster

Adult son not vaccinated

43 replies

randomunicorn · 18/09/2021 15:08

I have 3 children, 18, 15, 11.

Just after the isolation rules changed my 15yr old got covid, no one in the house had to isolate as me and DH are doubled vaccinated and the 18yr old and 11yr old are exempt as per the rules.

The eldest, 18 has chosen not to be vaccinated, he doesn't believe covid is as bad as it is made out and it's all some big social experiment and a way to control. The vaccine has a micro chip that is tracking us all. We've discussed this at length, but ultimately he is an adult and free to make his own choices.

However, now the 11yr old has covid, the 18yr old no longer falls under exemption rules but is refusing to isolate as he doesn't think it's fair, he did have covid about a year ago so says he's naturally immune.

I'm of the mind set that as an adult he has made a choice and he now needs to accept the results of this choice so I want to put my foot down and say, you isolate and that it that. DH is feeling guilty and saying if we are saying he an adult who can make his own decisions then we have to let him decide. But I think decisions that affect only him, are his to make, but decisions that may impact others are different.

What would you do in this situation?

OP posts:

kowari · 19/09/2021 07:02

Has he been told to isolate by test and trace?

Iwonder08 · 19/09/2021 07:06

You've told him your opinion on vaccination, you informed him about isolation requirements. There is nothing else you can or should do. If gets a fine he will have to deal with that.

kowari · 19/09/2021 07:11

Do you have to be officially identified as a contact and told to isolate to risk a fine, or not for household members?

Augusta1 · 19/09/2021 07:26

If it’s just your 11 year old who has Covid, your 18 year old doesn’t have to isolate (unless he tests positive himself). My DD has been isolating with Covid but the rest of the family have been going to work as normal.

kimlo · 19/09/2021 07:31

he is over 18 and isn't vaccinated, he does have to isolate. The other people in the house don't because they are either under 18 or vaccinated.

Augusta1 · 19/09/2021 07:40

Ah, my mistake. I hadn’t realised that non-vaccinated contacts still had to isolate. We’re all vaccinated so that bit went over my head. 👍

onelittlefrog · 19/09/2021 09:16

@kimlo

Is he over 18.5?

It's not his decision to make or yours, he doesn't fall under the exemptions so he has to isolate. Are test and trace not ringing him?

This. It's not his choice. It's just what he has to do. He's not exempt.

onelittlefrog · 19/09/2021 09:18

@Augusta1

This is not true.

(I know you corrected yourself later but just reiterating).

If someone in your house has Covid you do have to isolate, even if you are vaccinated.

The vaccine doesn't prevent you getting or spreading the virus. It just makes the symptoms less severe. If you are in a household with someone who has Covid, you still have to isolate so that you are not risking spreading it on to others.

underneaththeash · 19/09/2021 09:21

He lives in your house, so your rules 18 or not.

He either follows your rules or moves out.

Sugarandtime · 19/09/2021 09:26

@WildfirePonie

You can catch and spread covid after being vaccinated. So if you don't want to spread it around then you should all isolate.

Totally this

lljkk · 19/09/2021 09:46

The conspiracy theory love would upset me a lot.
I would talk to him a lot about why those sources are rubbish.
He wants better sources of information.

I would remind him that there may be legal penalties if he doesn't isolate.

Augusta1 · 19/09/2021 10:37

@onelittlefrog you’re wrong. If you’ve been fully vaccinated you don’t have to isolate if you live with someone who has Covid. You get a text message from Test & Trace who tell you that you should have a PCR, which we did. We also did daily lateral flows. We carried on working as did two of my colleagues who also had household members with Covid, as per the current guidance. My DDs isolation period is over and no one else in the house caught Covid from her, hence no one was off work unnecessarily.

ArnoldtheAngryTapir · 19/09/2021 11:02

What would I do in this situation?
I'd let the 18 year old get on with it and concentrate on my sick child.

Crazy conspiracy theories aside, he's had it already so (according to research) should have pretty good t cell protection from catching it again which also means he's less likely to spread germs.

Many of the rules are ridiculous- and always have been. Remember only going out once a day for 30 minutes and drones following walkers in the Peak District?

I'm not advocating disregarding all rules but some are clearly rubbish like the vaccinated people don't have to isolate one.

As for PP advising you to turf him out !!! Surely by now everyone knows that when a parent doesn't agree with their child's choices that attitude never works and only serves to drive a wedge between parent and child. See also threads where an OPs husband won't get vaccinated and the chorus of replies that she should divorce him :)

kowari · 19/09/2021 11:14

@ArnoldtheAngryTapir
I agree. Though I'm interested in knowing in which circumstances you can be fined. If he was contacted by test and trace and at risk of a fine I think I'd want him to isolate if he was still financially dependent on me. Morally, I don't think there is an issue whether he has natural immunity or is vaccinated.

Jaxhog · 19/09/2021 11:39

It's only his choice if he lives away from home. While he's in your home, he is subject to your rules. Whatever age he is.

Original poster

randomunicorn · 19/09/2021 14:35

He is isolating!

I decided to give him the choice, he's an adult who is independent and does his own thing, or he is a dependent who lives in our home who we support financially. He chose to keep the car and mobile phone and not have to pay for these out his earnings!

I just really want him to learn that choice have consequences and that we have to consider all the potential outcomes when making decisions and not just thinking about what suits here and now.

I do get some of the rules are nonsense, and I myself am fed up of them. But I think we all have to play out part for the greater good, whether we agree or not.

OP posts:

heldinadream · 19/09/2021 14:57

He chose to keep the car and mobile phone and not have to pay for these out his earnings!
Ha ha haha ha! Of course he did. Well played OP.
He'll learn.

StarCat2020 · 19/09/2021 15:20

@randomunicorn
You should be in Government or the UN

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