DH positive, what now?

[whiteonesugar]

DH has tested positive on a LFT today - which he only did because he was meant to be going to a football match tomorrow! He’s had a PCR and waiting the results.

I’m double jabbed (he’s single jabbed) and we have 2 DCs, 6 and 2.

What do we do now? Are we (me and DCs) self isolating until he gets the result (which seems futile as we don’t legally need to if it’s positive) And should DH be keeping away from us? He’s disappeared upstairs and intends to sleep in the spare room. Also, DCs have nursery and school next week, it seems wrong somehow to send them off knowing their dad has Covid!

Do we need PCR tests if his comes back positive? The younger DC had one this week due to a cough which was negative, older one and I did LFT today both negative.

Not sure what to do now tbh.

You don't have to isolate if double jabbed but if you can then I would. I'd do a PCR on all of you if he tests positive and then another one a few days later. I just recovered from Covid and DS didn't test positive until 6 days after I did, it can take a few days to pass on. Up to you whether you distance from him, if you want to try and avoid catching it then give it a go. I didn't bother trying to distance from my 8 year old but I'm a single parent so he had to stay home with me anyway.

Yea I’ve done an online shop, but the kids have clubs tomorrow - outdoors…and obv nursery and school - I’m not sure what to do for the best!

I’m downstairs and he’s upstairs, I think we’ll keep a distance for a few days at least just to minimise the risk of him spreading it.

Ugh it’s all a bit shit!

@whiteonesugar

I would sleep separately from your husband if you have space.

We are all double jabbed. I continued to sleep in the same bed as DH for 5 days after he tested positive (no spare room) , obviously caught it and have only just started to feel better a month later.

Sorry to hear that @DontDrinkDontSmokeWhatDoIDo hope you make a full recovery soon.

He is in the spare room, possibly one thing I’m not too fussed about haha!

We self isolated the last few days because a friend we had seen tested positive. Our results are negative. I made the decision to self isolate as a sahm with no work commitments and 2 children who were happy to stay at home. It's tricky now as obviously you are not required to stay in!

Just wait it out and keep your fingers crossed. It's hard.

Scotland: You all need to SI until he gets his result. If his result is positive you need to SI and get a test. Only once you have received a negative result can you come out of SI.
England : NO SI required.

www.gov.uk/government/publications/covid-19-stay-at-home-guidance/stay-at-home-guidance-for-households-with-possible-coronavirus-covid-19-infection#exempt

@spaceghetto yea if it was a couple of weeks ago i would do the same, I don’t really mind isolating for a bit and not socialising and I can wfh, but my older one goes back to school next week, younger one is due in nursery on Tuesday and even if I did keep them home, I’ve got no leave to use so would still have work to worry about as I can’t work with the baby here.

I dunno whether to even tell nursery or school, do I have to? This is all just madness! Argh!

@Mantlemoose I’m in England so I know we don’t NEED to self isolate it’s more about whether we still should, and the logistics of living with someone who is attempting to self isolate.

Keeping my fingers crossed that you don’t catch it…I f St int think the rules state you have to tell the school unless the school requested parents to do so- madness but I think that’s the rule

If I were you, I'd put DH in a room on his own and ask him to stay there. Deliver food etc to his door. Obviously check on him if he feels seriously unwell but both wear masks while doing so. He can come out to use the bathroom masked and stay away from the rest of you. Leave windows open as much as the weather allows.

DD who is 14 tested positive in June and this is what we did. We had family meals over Zoom and she was in her room until she tested negative again about a week later (I only let her out of her room masked to sit in the garden until ten days were up). Neither DH nor I caught it.

This way you can probably reasonably send the kids back to school etc as you will have minimised possibly transmission as much as you can.

*possible

@Fauvist I think that’s the plan. He was upstairs most of the afternoon, he came
Down to eat but only after the kids went to bed and we’ve kept windows open etc. Once the PCR confirms it we’ll have to discuss what else we do. Clinging onto the hope it was false. Defo clutching at straws lol

Rather than try to interpret law, use your common sense.

Guidance (in England) is you all get a PCR but none of you need to isolate- except your DH of course - unless you get symptoms or test positive. You don't need to isolate as double jabbed and under 18s aren't required to.
Obvs this is guidance and up to you what you do, could do daily lateral flows for peace of mind?

@flightofthewilderbeast Yep we’ve ordered more lateral flows so plan to do them on me at least every other day and he’s staying away as much as he can. I’ve ordered food shopping online and won’t take the children to their clubs today.

@PickAChew it’s not quite that simple is it though? Not like we are debating whether to go to Alton Towers for the day it’s about school, nursery and work and the implications there. Common sense would say keep the children home. Knowingly sending my children to spend the day with 30 others when their dad has Covid at home seems bonkers but I work so what am I supposed to do? I can’t take unpaid leave and the summer holidays wiped out my leave allowance, school didn’t run a holiday club because of…you guessed it…Covid. Sigh.

It’s all just a mess. Im sure DH has health anxiety too, he is worried about himself and scared to pass it to the kids, I’ve got asthma too so really would prefer not to catch it myself. We are all in pretty good health so I’m not scared as such of us catching it but there’s always that background worry.

Thanks to those who’ve offered advice and support it’s really appreciated.

The government rules are stupid and will lead us all to further bloody lockdowns and loads more cases.
Please don’t send your children into a class putting lots of other children at risk. It could spread like wildfire. I’d be gutted if a child was in school knowing their dad had covid. It puts pressure on all the other families snd teachers wondering whether it’s the right thing sending their kids in.
I’m sorry you’re in this position. Please stick with what is the right thing, not what the rules say.

It's crazy isn't it. Personally we're planning to isolate if we get it - I couldn't in good conscience send my child to nursery knowing he likely had it. We both wfh though, so although hellish trying to work with a toddler around, it is an easier decision.

If you have a spare room you may as well keep DH in there and try to avoid getting it.

I plan to keep us all home the next few days and test regularly. In terms of nursery and school I’m still not sure what to do, I would feel the same @Superstar22 but I also have work to think about and know I’m not the only one.

I am hoping to keep DH away from us all, test regularly and if DH is negative by the time DS is due back to school then we’ll decide what to do then.

Awful isn’t it.
We’re planning the same - keep kids off nursery and school if one of us gets it.
We are fortunate in that I can do my work from home once the kids are in bed (exhausting but feasible) and DH’s employer has said they don’t want people in with covid in the house.
I’m not sure if schools will set online work?
I realise others are not able to WFH in this situation and will have to act differently. The government should’ve made isolation for household cases law.

Good luck OP. Hope you stay well.

If you do send the kids to nursery/school please, please lft them every day and let the school know there is covid in the household. You legally don't have to, but morally is a different matter.
I'm a CEV teacher. We know vaccines work far less well on immunocompromised people and there is still a serious risk of hospitalisation and death for CEV teachers and pupils. There's not much we can do now the government has decided herd immunity in schools is the way forward, but at least if we know we can seat the children from an infected household near a window, and away from CEV people or those children with CEV family at home.

Will schools even authorise absence in this situation? I'm not being goady, I just really don't know - will they be chasing up absence if a child doesn't have symptoms or a positive test? If so, I very much doubt they'll be setting online work, as it's a lot of work for teachers and could be seen to be encouraging unnecessary absence.

Maybe there will be some clarification from schools as to how they advise handling it once the kids are back in.
I know that doesn’t help your immediate situation OP.

@QuarantineQueen this is where I am struggling. My older son is 6, I don’t want him to be the ‘kid with Covid’ and potentially get pushed to the side of the classroom away from him friends, it would be horrible for him (I totally get why but I’m thinking of his mental well-being). We would of course test him daily if he went to school but telling them makes me feel worried for him.

Isolation for DH ends on 6th so he would only miss 3 days if we kept him home. But like @thefamilyness says I don’t know what the school will think about that. I can keep the older one home easier than the younger one tbh, at least the 6 year old can entertain himself whilst I work. 2 year old not so much!

It’s all so crap.