A thread of acceptance and compassion? (I hope)

[KeepYourCustardCreams]

We've been pitted against each other too much and for too long. It's been a hell of an 18 months for so many people. Most people have been bewildered, or scared, or angry, or upset, or grieving (for people or old ways of life), or bewildered.

No one has the answers to any of this. Information and policy keep changing. It's incredibly complicated, and confusing.

So I for one just want to say (and I hope others will join me)...

If you've chosen to be jabbed - great.
If you've chosen not to be jabbed - also great.
If you've been pro-lockdown, anti-lockdown, loved the masks, hated them, think our government locked down too much, or that it didn't do enough... I totally wish you well and respect that we have different perspectives and experiences of this.

If you've got or have had COVID, whether or not you're jabbed, I hope you're OK and/or get well very soon.

Can we try to resist the divisions we're being encouraged to make, and have one thread where we can state our commitment to just being decent to each other and completely accepting each other's different decisions, etc.?

Who's with me?

@PopcornMuncher You are not barking up the wrong tree. The week I decided to do what I wanted I ended up cancelling it as I was not spoken to for 4 days. This is my point. Not everyone has freedom of choice or if they do, it comes with extremely difficult strings. There is no sympathetic ear for people like me. I am bombarded with friends, strangers, even celebrities shaming people like me to the extent I have removed myself from all social media, increasing my isolation. My next huge fear is the kids have to live through this, when their turn to be vaccinated comes. Covid has destroyed my marriage and my life.

Even this thread, which is the first kind thread I have felt able to post on, has had one poster coming on to say the sort of things that keep me awake at night. So there is no safe place where people try to consider the myriad reasons some people can't 'conform'

While I do agree with your sentiments my experience has been that this division exists mainly on MN and online and not in real life. Just as Brexit.

I find ordinary people are mostly tolerant and middle of the road.

Most sensible thing I have read in ages. OP I am totally with you. Thank you

So I for one just want to say (and I hope others will join me)...

If you've chosen to be jabbed - great.
If you've chosen not to be jabbed - also great.
If you've been pro-lockdown, anti-lockdown, loved the masks, hated them, think our government locked down too much, or that it didn't do enough... I totally wish you well and respect that we have different perspectives and experiences of this.

I’m not sure this is quite right. Most people who have chosen to be vaccinated probably don’t think it’s “great” that others chose not to be. Wouldn’t it be better to agree to respect that other people have the right to make choices that we think are bad and not every thread needs to become a argument about their decision? Especially if they’ve caught covid after not getting vaccinated. I’ve seen some horribly unnecessary “I told you so” type posts.

@Horizon44 sorry you’re going through this. It might be worth posting for support on the relationships board. Things sound so hard with your dh.

@BareGrylls

While I do agree with your sentiments my experience has been that this division exists mainly on MN and online and not in real life. Just as Brexit. I find ordinary people are mostly tolerant and middle of the road.

Think this is very important to remember

The most polarised people are going to be the ones loudly and frequently posting on SM.

@Horizon44 the combination of worries about other people's opinions, your own basic preferences/choices, and the control from your husband sounds very hard to bear. Is there anyone at all you can talk to to try to tease it all apart a bit?

Yes to this!! Well said op 👏

Just as Brexit. I find ordinary people are mostly tolerant and middle of the road.

I dunno... I find I encounter more strongly held opinions about covid controls than anything else in my life. Maybe I say that because I am quietly disagreeing with most the people I know, whereas we usually agree on most things -- but not about covid controls. It's been painful.

@Horizon44 sounds like coercive control. Do you want to start a thread on the relationships board as pp suggested? You will get good advice there

Honestly OP most people I know IRL are middle of the road live and let live. It's not all doom and gloom out there.

Civilized debate should always be encouraged. People listen less nowadays. We should all try that a bit more.

Hello. I just wanted to bump this thread, in case it can be of use to anyone feeling unsupported or isolated, on here or in real life x

@Horizon44, how are you getting on?

@frozendaisy, sorry to respond to your post so late but yes, I do agree. In the real world, there does seem to be more nuance, and people are being kinder about each other's perspectives. Not always - and I suspect the online world "spills" into real life too for some - but it can definitely be crueller on here than it is elsewhere (which is a shame, because I used to associated MN with a lot of understanding and open-mindedness in the past).

Lovely post, thank you

Thank you @KeepYourCustardCreams.....

One of my basic rules for getting through life is live and let live (usual disclaimers against those doing clearly defined or maliciously motivated harm etc - which can of course be subjectively picked apart till the cows come home but hope most will get the gist and take it in the spirit intended).

So weary of the division and vitriol.....

I've just been tested positive after swerving it for the duration despite close contacts including a household case over Christmas.

It's mild, I'm ok - have a few people I have told out of necessity freaking out because I'm unvaccinated..... however, fully jabbed DP is also positive so just goes to show it's Russian roulette on a grand scale. And I'm aware I could be accused of saying I'm alright Jack - but of course I feel for people worse off than me and appreciate my good fortune. It's the polarisation and entrenched views that freak me out and like many has caused me to withdraw from the world a bit.

So I truly appreciate a call for a truce and recognition that ultimately we're all the same imperfect beings under the skin.

Good wishes to all.

Very wll said, OP

No doubt your thread will get thoroughly derailed, but well said all the same

@MistressoftheDarkSide sorry to hear you and your DP have tested positive. Very glad to hear it's mild. Hope you're feeling completely better soon.

ultimately we're all the same imperfect beings under the skin.

^ I love this - well said.

Just wondering how you're doing, @MistressoftheDarkSide? Hope you and your DP are both doing OK.

Also hope everyone else is well and happy in as far as is possible today x

@Horizon44, I'm so sorry you're in that situation, and I ho0e things improve for you soon, but I think you have to consider that it's not covid that has wrecked your marriage and your life. Your husband has done it.

Please help. Sdd had cornavirus and her household are isolating. Ten days up tomorrow. Her brother has symptoms and testes positive today. Does this mean the other people in that house have to isolate a further 10 days as brother is positive or will their isolatin end regardless. And if you have an answer could you show me any links as this is causing disagreements.
Many thanks

Only positive people have to isolate now.