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Covid

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Original poster

Unvaccinated. Staying with friends.

110 replies

Tiredpanda · 27/07/2021 23:45

I have chosen for now, not to be vaccinated with covid vaccine (waiting for MRI to clarify if I have a problem with my heart as something was found).

My friend has asked me and my family to stay with them for a week. They are vaccinated except the children. My partner and son has had covid.

I think I'm over worrying but do you think I should tell them I'm not vaccinated? Surely they wouldn't ask us to stay without asking if we are vaccinated if they were concerned?!

I have friends who have chosen not to vaccinate and many who have had it. It doesn't bother me at all but I know it does bother some people.

OP posts:

Saidtoomuch · 28/07/2021 08:03

@Nextlevelnonsense, just one questions - what???
@Tiredpanda I would tell your host. I think we are all assuming that everyone else who can be vaccinated is. You should do a lateral flow before you visit, regardless of vaccine.

MsTSwift · 28/07/2021 08:05

Anecdotally Covid is racing through the unvaccinated teens here. In our friendship group alone 3 families isolating as teens have Covid - holidays cancelled 🙁

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 28/07/2021 08:19

I would say if your friend was worried they should ask- do a lateral flow test and that’s fine imo.
Never have people disclosed all their medical records to me before staying over.

Waxonwaxoff0 · 28/07/2021 08:21

[quote Farwest]@waxonwaxoff0
I couldn't care less who is vaccinated and who isn't, it would make no difference to me.

It's not really so hard to understand why your close friends who have invited you to stay might care, though, is it? It makes a difference to lots of people and might make a difference to them.

Why put them in the position of needing to ask for personal medical information? I think we'd all agree that's intrusive.

These are the OP's friends. People she really cares about. People who trust her. Of course she should level with them.[/quote]
If they're that bothered, then they'd ask.

Bryonyshcmyony · 28/07/2021 08:21

I'd just assume you were vaccinated.

Honestly I'm struggling to understand why you are deliberately putting yourself in a situation where you could easily catch Covid when you have a suspected heart condition
What does your gp say?

grapewine · 28/07/2021 08:23

@gogohm

Mention it, give them the choice

Absolutely this.

AtrociousCircumstance · 28/07/2021 08:24

Tell them, of course.

Bryonyshcmyony · 28/07/2021 08:26

Actually now I've thought about it, I'm not sure what the OP would gain by telling them. It's not their issue, it's yours. You are not vaccinated so you need to take steps to protect yourself. Don't push the issue onto them to have to deal with.

Farwest · 28/07/2021 08:28

@OnlyFoolsnMothers

I would say if your friend was worried they should ask- do a lateral flow test and that’s fine imo. Never have people disclosed all their medical records to me before staying over.

Sanguinesuzy · 28/07/2021 08:40

I can't believe you are not having the jab if you have potential heart issues. Covid is not purely a respiratory illness, it also effects blood vessels. Some people have had PEs, cardiac events and rhythm irregularities as a result of the virus.

OliveTree75 · 28/07/2021 08:47

It's not really so hard to understand why your close friends who have invited you to stay might care, though, is it? It makes a difference to lots of people and might make a difference to them.

If they cared that much surely they would have asked when they invited the OP.

MarshaBradyo · 28/07/2021 08:49

They might not care but one way to find out is to mention it.

OliveTree75 · 28/07/2021 08:51

I have had friends cancel coming over for play dates as their dc were exposed to chicken pox (didn't have it at the time, but a child at school did)

if my friends cancelled on us because another kid at school had chicken pox I would think it was an excuse.

toocold54 · 28/07/2021 08:56

I would mention it, by the way, I’ve not yet had my vaccinations due to recent heart investigations, hope you are ok with that.

I agree.
If it was important to them they would have asked but it’s just politeness to mention it.

notalwaysalondoner · 28/07/2021 08:57

I personally wouldn’t mention it unless they asked, EXCEPT if it was relevant because I was also being more careful in other ways. I had some friends stay recently who had decided they were only comfortable eating outside in pubs/restaurants but neglected to mention this, then made a fuss when I’d booked an inside table (and it was raining really hard so we couldn’t sit outside). I was so annoyed they hadn’t told me in advance so I could have adjusted our plans, it was also a shame as it meant our friends we hadn’t seen for two years went home early rather than stay for our lunch we’d booked. But if you’re not taking any extra precautions at all I don’t think it’s something you have to declare to all and sundry. I haven’t had it because I’m heavily pregnant so decided to wait the extra 5 weeks until I’d had the baby, I certainly am not telling everybody about that decision unless they ask.

bumbleymummy · 28/07/2021 09:19

Wouldn’t occur to me to ask if someone was vaccinated. If they didn’t ask, they probably don’t care.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 28/07/2021 09:20

I have had friends cancel coming over for play dates as their dc were exposed to chicken pox (didn't have it at the time, but a child at school did). I have had a friend cancel coffee because their partner came down with flu and they wanted to wait a few days to see if they might have it, too. (She did, sadly.) These things happen - friends try not to pass on contagious diseases to each other, even when they are unsure if they have the disease or not and if the OP had been told to isolate or had symptoms or a positive lateral flow test then you’re analogy would work. As it is it’s as ott as saying we exist therefore there’s a risk of covid, true even if vaccinated. I’d actually prefer a test result to my friend being vaccinated.

Mrstreehouse · 28/07/2021 09:29

New covid etiquette book needs to be written. To hug or not to hug? To declare vaccination status or not? To book tables inside or out? It’s a minefield. Best to ask I think or declare beforehand, just to be transparent.

Manzanilla55 · 28/07/2021 09:41

I just wouldnt go staying at friends right now and I am double jabbed.

starrynight87 · 28/07/2021 09:42

If I was unvaccinated, I wouldn't go at all.

MrsBobDylan · 28/07/2021 09:45

I wouldn't go in your position to protect yourself op.

BogRollBOGOF · 28/07/2021 09:45

It's not anyone's business. We've never gone around sharing our status over flu/ BCG/ meningitis vaccinations. It's not a good convention to start.

drpet49 · 28/07/2021 09:45

* You should tell them. Rightly or wrongly I just assume everyone I know is vaccinated. I'd want to know if someone was staying in my house.*

^I completely agree. You need to tell them OP.

dudsville · 28/07/2021 09:46

I think at the moment we should check in with others to see what they're comfortable with. I've read threads on here of vaccinated families having to cancel a holiday because one of them tested positive before departure. Vaccine reduces liklihood of transmission and chances of developing symptoms and the strength of those symptoms, but not to 100%. I'd want to be sure they made their own decision about this.

Mrstreehouse · 28/07/2021 09:48

@BogRollBOGOF it’s hardly the same thing. There are no restrictions around any of these other diseases and it won’t mean you have to cancel a potential holiday or end up self isolating….

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