I think this is it for us…

[Namechanged4thi5]

My daughter has a sniffle- she went to a children’s party only 7 kids no parents but has come back with a sniffle

Husband double jabbed but when he went to pick up he was invited into the house where he said there were other parents standing in the kitchen. He was in for about 8-9 mins but feels uncomfortable

I’m yet to be vaccinated so now I feel my times up with Covid- my husband is pretty convinced I’ll die but I starting to wobble a bit now….I don’t have anyone to talk to in to hence the reason I have to rely on mumsnet to have a rant

Your DH exposed himself??! There's a register for that!
Seriously OP...it's abusive. Tell him to get fucked.

So op is sure he isn't abusive and doesn't control her or try and monitor he movements or scare her in anyway. He genuinely thinks this.

In some ways that's so much worse.

We have one parent who has a type of really awful health anxiety focused on his wife. But not that bad, he didn't decline an invitation to stand in a crowded kitchen.

So kind of sounds like he is hoping he would catch it and give it to her and kill her?

I can't get my head round the fact that if he, genuinely, thinks op is going to die why would he put himself in that position.

And a wife, that's accepted she is going to die without actually looking anything up at all. But also accepts her husband putting himself in a position where he could catch & give her a virus that they both think will kill her.

I feel bad for the daughter.

And mn have confirmed this is a long time poster so unlikely to be a troll

I hope you are keeping your DD shielded from this lunacy. I say this as a child who gr3e up with just one parent with health anxiety.

I don’t know why people need to be so rude to the OP. Many people have phobias that interfere with their lives, and those of their close family. If you can’t imagine such a scenario you have nothing to offer her.

OP, this is not rational. The likelihood of you being ill enough to need ICU admission for Covid is minuscule. It’s not even clear that minority ethnic groups are more at risk - socioeconomic factors are probably as important.

The risk of anaphylaxis from any of the vaccines is also very low, and unless you have a family history of the specific type of clots that affect a tiny percentage of AZ recipients this is also not a significant risk. Now these tiny risks are known about they can be monitored for and treated anyway. Anaphylaxis or clots do not equal death.

You must get some proper advice about this from another GP or a doctor at the vaccination centre, and get your jab asap. This will reduce your risk of death from Covid to negligible. You may well feel a bit ill after the vaccine - this is totally normal.

Your DH also needs some help with his health anxiety. It’s not only affecting him but it’s affecting you. I have some sympathy with him because I felt similar about my DH (with reason - he had a serious condition and major surgery with complications) and I have “relapses” when anything else happens, but I have learned to manage it and most importantly don’t visit my fear on him. This took counselling, and still takes a massive effort.

In the meantime, I hope your DD feels better soon. My colleague’s small children had the sniffles last week - no Covid and are fine now.

@WiseUpJanetWeiss you feel anxious about your dh, which is understandable.

Would you then go put yourself in a position where you genyinely believe your actions would lead to his death?

OP you need access to independent therapy urgently to help you deal with your husband's gas lighting and passing on his weird theories to you.

You don't have to live in fear like this, with a man telling you are going to die. It's not ok. You deserve a life where someone doesn't make you the keeper of their fears and use them to make you terrified.

You are not going to die. Get a vaccine tomorrow.

Let me get this straight. Your DH is vaccinated because you believe vaccinations work, you also believe covid is an instant death sentence, but you’ve not had your vaccination despite your doctor saying it would be fine. That is stark raving bonkers.

I have had Covid with symptoms twice. I am still alive. (was in bed for a week each time.)

I am also now vaccinated.

Go and get your vaccine, it will help you and everyone else. They can do it under controlled conditions and they have everything there to cope with anaphylaxis/ adverse reactions.

If you are relatively young you are unlikely to die from Covid, but you are at more risk from Covid than from the vaccine.

[quote Unsoliciteddeckpic]@WiseUpJanetWeiss you feel anxious about your dh, which is understandable.

Would you then go put yourself in a position where you genyinely believe your actions would lead to his death?[/quote]
No of course not, but the rational part of my mind would know that the risk was small and I was being an idiot, so I might do the “normal” low risk thing and then catastrophise about it later.

Has this thread not been deleted yet? Assumed it was a hoax!

I've read some batshit threads on here but this one takes the biscuit. Presumably OP dropped dead of the covid sniffles overnight so hasn't been able to update..

@WiseUpJanetWeiss that's the point though. He has been telling her it will kill her for 16 months.

He hasn't done it then catastrophis later. This has been his constant opinion for 16 months.

I cant quite believe that for that few minutes, he all of a sudden thought it would be ok.

[quote Unsoliciteddeckpic]@WiseUpJanetWeiss that's the point though. He has been telling her it will kill her for 16 months.

He hasn't done it then catastrophis later. This has been his constant opinion for 16 months.

I cant quite believe that for that few minutes, he all of a sudden thought it would be ok.[/quote]
You’re entirely missing the point that none of this is logical or rational.

If you, yourself, haven't had an anaphylactic reaction to vaccines/medicines then that's fine. Just because there's history in your family - it's worth mentioning to the team - but it's extremely rare.

I do have a friend, abroad, who had an anaphylactic reaction - they have a history, themselves, of anaphylaxis with lots of foods & so on, they have a set of quite serious other health problems too. They're the only person I've ever heard of in friends and family having a reaction. And what happened is they started to react, were immediately given medical help, and then spent several hours (as it was late afternoon, they stayed overnight, in hospital, recovered but just being monitored).

So, I do understand having your vaccine on a day when your husband is about, just to make sure in case. But if you do have a reaction then the team there will immediately deal with it - it's why they make you wait for 15 minutes afterwards, just to check - and you'll be fine. It won't kill you. And if you've never personally had a reaction before (presumably you've had other jabs when you were young?) then you'll almost definitely be fine. I have allergies (which have never affected my breathing) and the doctor giving the vaccine said that was fine (and it was - both times).

It sounds like you're a bit isolated here, and it's worrying that your husband is thinking you might die. It could be that he feels a bit isolated, too, and so is projecting his catastrophising onto you.

Please go and have the jab - tell the team about your worries beforehand and they'll monitor you even more carefully. But it'll be so much safer to be jabbed than to risk getting the virus. (And even then, you're only likely to get sick. Death is extremely, extremely unlikely).

I get anxiety a lot, catastrophise loads, but this from your husband does seem off the scale. All the best!

Your husband is being ridiculous and is manipulating you.

Yes I agree @WiseUpJanetWeiss and I had the same after DS had sepsis from scarlet fever. The slightest temperature or illness sent me spiralling.

But in both cases they had a cause - an event that triggered it. The OP hasnt said there has been any previous event with flu or pneumonia etc that could have started this and it is interesting that it is about her dying and not him. The whole thing does need some unpicking I think by counselling because it is not a normal reaction

You must know that we rarely get symptoms within a couple of hours of being exposed.
And you must know that the majority of people who have caught Covid are absolutely fine. Even those in the vulnerable categories.

What is your daily life like, OP? Do you both work outside the home? Have you been shielding? Have you both been isolating since this started??

The reason you are anxious and panicking (and being very irrational) is because your DH has been emotionally abusing you and has weaponised COVID for his own agenda.

Your posts on this thread are terrifying @Namechanged4thi5

And your name change suggests you either know this or aren't being completely truthful.

Jesus Christ. If my husband kept telling me I was going to die he wouldn't stay my husband for long.

Op, you have zero reason to believe that you will die of corona or even end up ventilated. You are healthy and have some allergies. A family history of blood clots. And you are fit and healthy with no underlying conditions.

I have several auto immune diseases, a shitty immune system due to chemo and biological injections and also have several serious allergies and am an over weight smoker. I don't think I would die from corona ! The chances are incredibly slim.

I'm not sure what is worse tbh. Your Zoh repeatedly telling you you will end up ventilated or dead and both of you seriously believing that OR him going inside a house and exposing himself to the risk and believing you could die JUST TO BE POLITE. Just think, if anything happened to you he could at least take comfort in the fact he was not rude to the party host 🤷🏼‍♀️😳

Thank you for everyone who has been kind and understanding and showing concern. I had a slightly disturbed night but did manage to sleep so woken up with a clearer head. I’ll try and answer the questions

No I’m not in any kind of abusive relationship- emotional or otherwise
Looking back I think the anxiety is stemming from me as supposed to my husband and it’s rubbing off him because of the year we’ve had

We are usually planning everything due to no support of family friends in this country therefore something like Covid would have a strong effect, especially when we or anyone in our families can travel

I think because I typed in a blind panic I might have not been clear- yes my daughter has a sniffle I connected it to Covid - but it looks like something she has picked off school

Yes she went to a party with 7 other girls in her class and no parents: my husband dropped and went to pick her up as plane, he did this in order to protect me since I’m yet to be vaccinated

He was invited in out of the blue and he couldn’t have said no I’m staring right here on your door step

He is double vaccinated but was concerned that if he had exposed himself to the other parents who were also inside the house (this was unplanned) to pick the children that he would pass it into me

Yes he did say I’m worried you might end up ventilated or die ( not those exact words but something like things trying worse) because he is nervous for me

Yes we made the decision (well I made the decision) to space out the vaccines as on paper he had more chances of having lesser effects from the vaccine. I gave a bad family history as mentioned before, my dad ended up in icu with VITT for a different vaccine..

I’m still very anxious and watching for every symptom but also trying my best to be rationale

No my daughter is not exposed to my anxiety that’s the whole reason she was sent to the party

To be fair that’s a completely different account to the one in your OP and subsequent posts in which you’ve said your husband is telling you daily that you’re going to die or end up on a ventilator.

I wa trying to explain yesterday’s events as supposed to the events happened previously

He could have stayed on the doorstep

@Namechanged4thi5

I wa trying to explain yesterday’s events as supposed to the events happened previously

Yes, but people questioning whether your relationship is abusive are doing so on the basis that you said he tells you daily that you’re going to die. You seemed quite upset about it. Anyway if someone asked me to go inside and I didn’t want to I’d just say ‘ah don’t worry, I’ll just wait here thank you’.