'We've not been out since all this started'

[TheVampiresWife]

I heard this yesterday from someone DH works with (they're all wfh). A couple in their late 40s, no health issues with no vulnerabilities, fully vaccinated but 'you can't be too careful'.

They've not left the house apart from their vaccine appointments since the start of the first lockdown.

I understand how worrying it's all been for some people, particularly if you're vulnerable or have health anxiety. But it's so sad that people are this terrified. I wonder how they'll cope when restrictions end. The MH fallout from all this is going to be massive, isn't it?

I think a lot of people who say this are lying to be dramatic.

There will be a few exceptions that they have ' forgotten about' .

@OneAlabamaReturn

I think a lot of people who say this are lying to be dramatic.

There will be a few exceptions that they have ' forgotten about' .

Yes, many people do exaggerate.

I get annoyed by those who 'have worked all through this' - really, no annual leave at all? Even the NHS forced people take their annual leave even if they couldn't leave their local area and had to spend their annual leave at home. That is still annual leave and not working.

@Lostinacloud

In my opinion they have lost their lives to covid anyway then. Even though they are physically present, that’s not a full and fulfilling life. The stupid thing is that covid was most likely here in Nov/December 2019 which means that everyone was going about their business unaware for 4/5 months before lockdown. It’s the government’s fault people are so scared though and for that there is no excuse.

I agree! What are they staying alive and physically healthy FOR if it's to function (not live) like this indefinitely

I know a few people who "say" they haven't been out, but they do go out.
I bumped into a friend on holiday 300 miles away who had up till then claimed not to have been out of the house. It changed to "unless I can't avoid it" My brother claims not to have been out but when I recently visited it seems that he doesn't count the supermarket or pubs, or the post office or the barber's etc. I'm taking them all with a pinch of salt now.

[quote Snookie00]@PrettyVacancy. Whilst every adult has the right to turn into a hermit and waste their own life by hiding away from every possible risk, when they are expecting children to do the same it is not unacceptable and actually quite abusive. Passing your own anxiety and fear onto your children is not acceptable[/quote]
Totally agree.

Do you not think that from a MH point of view that's worrying?

No. Pathologizing other people's life choices is a bit worrying, though.

@TheVampiresWife

I heard this yesterday from someone DH works with (they're all wfh). A couple in their late 40s, no health issues with no vulnerabilities, fully vaccinated but 'you can't be too careful'.

They've not left the house apart from their vaccine appointments since the start of the first lockdown.

I understand how worrying it's all been for some people, particularly if you're vulnerable or have health anxiety. But it's so sad that people are this terrified. I wonder how they'll cope when restrictions end. The MH fallout from all this is going to be massive, isn't it?

I dunno....I have only been out of the house (well I have put the bins out and stuff) four times since before lockdown1 for family personal reasons that are not to do with covid or my (or anybody else's) mental health. Two of those visits were for vaccination. Before all this kicked off i got my shopping delivered and didn't like browsing the shops and so on. I am fine. I am meeting up with some friends in their garden in two weeks weather permitting and looking forward to it. I am lucky that I have always been a loner and I have got a large garden and plenty to do at home. Are they really terrified or are they happy with the situation?

@unwuthering

Do you not think that from a MH point of view that's worrying?

No. Pathologizing other people's life choices is a bit worrying, though.

Being concerned that the NHS isn't going to be able to cope with thousands of people suffering from what is essentially a form of PTSD/agoraphobia isn't pathologizing others' life choices.

Our fit healthy elderly neighbour did this. She now has carers four times a day and needs to go into a nursing home. Just back from yet another emergency hospital admission. It's tragic

I work with a couple of people like this drives me bonkers

Especially when they make you feel guilty and a pariah for it

@justasking111

Our fit healthy elderly neighbour did this. She now has carers four times a day and needs to go into a nursing home. Just back from yet another emergency hospital admission. It's tragic

That may have been an age related deterioration. Very often people are fit and healthy until suddenly they are not, and I don't think you go into a nursing home for agoraphobia all on its own.

PS if it really was covid related fear do you think she would agree to a nursing home in a million years?

@PrettyVacancy

So why did you make this post? I’m genuinely confused as to what you’re getting out of it? You can’t make everyone conform to your rules. People will do what they want and some of them might like staying in, away from the finger pointers?

Have a day off love

Jeeeesus

I am lucky that I have always been a loner and I have got a large garden and plenty to do at home. Are they really terrified or are they happy with the situation?

I relate to this also. A weekly trawl of local charity shops would be icing on the cake. I've no desire , otherwise,to be schlepping out when there is no need. I feel like the pressure's off and I'm much more relaxed. I do count myself as very lucky though, to feel content when others are struggling. A little guilty too.

Being concerned that the NHS isn't going to be able to cope with thousands of people suffering from what is essentially a form of PTSD/agoraphobia isn't pathologizing others' life choices.

Interesting to see so many who pooh-pooh the validity of a diagnosis of long covid and the ramifications for healthcare after this pandemic being so dreadfully concerned for fictitious diagnoses of psychiatric disorders in those who make different life choices, being constituted diffferently from the average extroverted dying to go to the pub/ softplay/ group hug / whatever / chomping at the bit to throw off the 'face nappies' sort.

I think some people’s risk assessments vary according to their preferences. So going to the supermarket is fine, but going to work very risky. Mixing with family members has happened all along, but a pub lunch equals certain death.

Anyway, if people want to shut themselves away, that’s their business. But I wish their social media would be blocked so they can’t harangue others.

That may have been an age related deterioration. Very often people are fit and healthy until suddenly they are not, and I don't think you go into a nursing home for agoraphobia all on its own.

IME it's very important for elderly people to "keep going", and when they stop it can often trigger a sudden downward spiral in their physical and cognitive capabilities.

Going from an active life with the WI / supermarket trips / friends / volunteering at the charity shop / cruises and so on, to just trying to look after yourself and home, is often exactly the sort of thing that triggers a downward spiral.

Now, that's not to say that it couldn't have been a coincidence - it's just that it could very well have been caused by lockdown too.

Just a thought, if I had my own garden I would probably never want to leave it as well. It is fantastic exercise, outdoors and very good for your mental health. Can't see they are doing anything wrong with that one!

and 40 is not 'elderly'

@unwuthering

Being concerned that the NHS isn't going to be able to cope with thousands of people suffering from what is essentially a form of PTSD/agoraphobia isn't pathologizing others' life choices.

Interesting to see so many who pooh-pooh the validity of a diagnosis of long covid and the ramifications for healthcare after this pandemic being so dreadfully concerned for fictitious diagnoses of psychiatric disorders in those who make different life choices, being constituted diffferently from the average extroverted dying to go to the pub/ softplay/ group hug / whatever / chomping at the bit to throw off the 'face nappies' sort.

As someone who isn't a fan of socialising, thinks long covid is real, thinks if you can wear a mask you probably should even though I'm exempt myself and would sooner eat my hand than group hug people, I can understand that people's thoughts and beliefs are not as polarised as you seem to think.

People are saying there were no roadblocks etc. I live in Wales and there have definitely been police stopping people and asking why they were out, where were they going during some of our lockdowns.

I had a relative stopped during the first lockdown and turned back because he was going to lay flowers on a grave and this wasn't deemed a good reason.

We also had police stopping people on the main A roads into Wales to check they weren't holidaymakers.

@unwuthering also, my diagnosis wasn't fictitious, incidentally.

We had roadblocks in the southwest too. A friend was stopped and turned back as the supermarket she planned to visit was not deemed to be her closest (though it was the cheapest).

Yes, I must admit that a long-term ban on hugging would be a godsend for me! And thank god for the demise of social kissing - terribly awkward. (Actually I’m sure children have been mighty relieved to escape the embraces of whiskery relatives…)

My dh is vulnerable and on chemotherapy (for rest of his life)

We’ve hardly been anywhere in 15 months. I go to our local parade of shops to the butchers, chemist and the co-op about twice a month.

Today for the first time I went into town, it’s not the biggest of places. I’m 54, had cancer myself. I wasn’t keen to go but it’s got to the stage where there were things I wanted I could only really get if I went.
What I wasn’t prepared for was the feeling of panic that set in as I went about doing what need to be done, side stepping people, I wore a mask (and a visor in the shops). I only went in places I felt looked empty enough for me to feel comfortable but I wasn’t one bit in any of them. I was sweating and feeling quite unlike myself in the end after four shops and came home.

Not at all keen to repeat the process and really surprised I felt like this considering I had been shopping locally. I would say I’m normally a confident person so I’m not surprised People are having MH issues.