I’m outside. I need a push to go in....

[fireflylanegirls]

Today is the day. I’m back at work.

My son has been at nursery for 3 weeks and today I’m back in the office.

I’m currently sat in the car park and my heart has not stopped pounding.

It just all looks so normal. I’ve seen a few of my colleagues walk by and everyone just looks the same, happy.

I don’t know what it’s like in the office in terms of Covid, I have a meeting as soon as I go in to discuss the changes.

I don’t think I have ever felt so nervous.

I’m 19 days post my 1st vaccine so not even at the 21 day mark.

I feel like turning around and going home! 😩

It absolutely IS an anxiety issue and you are deluding yourself to think it’s anything else.

There is going to be a LOT of covid fear out there after this. I don’t know what the answer is. You are more protected than most. Knock me down with a feather if you are actually unlucky enough to get covid now. Do you have anxiety about catching a regular cold, ir some other nasty virus, or a sickness bug? All are more likely than covid for you right now but I bet you don’t even think about them day to day.

I think this is part of the problem, you've been living in a bubble for the past x months, staying at home and living a very abnormal life, those of us who carried on living normally have realised it isn't actually that scary out there,.

Mm, definitely agree with @userxx. I’ve been working all the way through and getting public transport. I’ve never had covid and al not eligible for a vaccine. A few of my friends have been at home or furloughed and are getting really twitchy about being called back in, lots of drama about whether it’s safe and how they can’t possibly take the bus as they used to. I am starting to think, for God’s sake, really. Genuine anxiety aside, It’s insulting in a way to those of us who have just had to get on with it and have never had the luxury of being cocooned at home during a worldwide pandemic.

It’s insulting in a way to those of us who have just had to get on with it and have never had the luxury of being cocooned at home during a worldwide pandemic

Yes. Those who have stayed at home throughout have only been able to do so due to those who couldn’t stay at home and have had to work out of the house throughout.

@LIZS

Glad you managed it. You can only control how you behave. Wear a mask, use the sanitiser, take a flask of drinks and lunch to avoid communal kitchen. Are there screens between desks? It will get easier.

I do all of those things. There are no screens between desks.😦

I'd like to think that the majority of people don't feel like this as I can't get a table for love nor money in my city after April 12th. We all need to be getting back to normal ASAP.

Have you worked from home because you are particularly vulnerable aside from being overweight? In your colleagues shoes if I was in I'd be starting to get annoyed as well.

Looking at it rationally, you don’t mention having any issues with little or no SD at nursery and your child being in that environment and so surely the office is much safer as you are an adult and can ask people to stand back etc if too close.

They all seem happy with the way things are

Why do you think they feel this way, and you don't?
It is your anxiety and perception of the risk that is different.

And so what if you catch covid? You've been vaccinated and even prior to that you would most likely have suffered very mildly

[quote Sunshinegirl82]@fireflylanegirls

I understand that your anxiety makes it hard to see this but the root of all of your feelings is the anxiety itself. On your previous thread you were certain that you'd feel much more relaxed once you had the vaccine and on that thread lots of people said that anxiety doesn't work that way and it would just latch onto something else. Ultimately that is what happened, you had the vaccine and it didn't resolve anything.

This is just another example of that, your level of anxiety is not proportionate to the risk you are being exposed to. Your belief that your reaction is proportionate and justified is all part of the anxiety.

How long have you been taking medication now? Are you due to have a review with your GP? If your anxiety is still very high I'd suggest that you may need to try a higher dose or a different medication. [/quote]
It is anxiety behind it OP. Sometimes it is very hard to recognise what is rational fear and what is anxiety. I think I was one of the posters on your earlier thread saying vaccination wouldn't help because what you were dealing with then and now is anxiety. And anxiety just doesn't work that way. The anxiety needs to be addressed and dealt with. I have social anxiety, GAD and OCD. DS1 has anxiety and panic attacks. I generally know when my fears and intrusive thoughts are irrational, ds1 doesn't. Knowing what is causing the fear doesn't help me stop it, but you can learn over time to recognise what is anxiety and then apply the techniques learnt CBT or ACT or other techniques including gradual exposure to reduce your anxiety over time. Given the level of anxiety you've been dealing with medication or an increase/change to current medication might be worth discussing with your GP. Medication can give you the mental space you need for the techniques learnt in therapy to help.

@wizzbangfizz

Have you worked from home because you are particularly vulnerable aside from being overweight? In your colleagues shoes if I was in I'd be starting to get annoyed as well.

I haven’t worked from home, I’ve been on maternity leave.

@WitchesBritchesPumpkinPants

As you are young, your immunity is probably as good as it'll get from the first vaccine already (apparently it's a bit slower when you're older).

Are you wearing a mask? They do help the wearer as well (just not as much) change it when it gets damp.

Use hand sanitiser

You can always leave if they're not following good practice.

First day back after maternity, baby in nursery is pretty horrible for most mums - Covid on top, it's bound to be nerve wracking.

I'm holding your hand, we need to go in!

What a lovely post!

OP you can do this!

Op you've made the first step back in.

I'm sure with the cbt therapy learning to keep the anxiety at a good low level and time you will settle in and feel more safe.

Things are gradually opening up now.
Schools have been back now for a good few weeks and the figures are looking lower so all
Positive.

Have your workplace introduced lateral
Flow weekly testing yet?

@wtfisgoingonhere21

Yes they have, we haven’t started doing them yet as we haven’t received the tests, but the business is registered.

@fireflylanegirls

That's good

We test at home twice weekly anyway due to secondary school age dc and when I'm back at work we will also be testing there so it's another thing to put your mind at rest abit more.

It's inevitable that a huge amount of people are going to be feeling really nervous stepping back into things after the dreadful year we have all had.

It's affected people so much more then originally thoight so remember there are lots of people feeling similar to you and it's alright to feel like it.

Typical in our country we seem to expect the stiff upper lip and that just makes the anxiety manifest

Hopefully each day will get a little better

Could you perhaps wear your mask at your desk when people get too close?
If they say anything you can just say your finding it a bit daunting being back and have a baby at home to protect as well as yourself.

If they are decent they will respect that and maybe be more careful with the distancing thing.

@wtfisgoingonhere21

Could you perhaps wear your mask at your desk when people get too close?

Isn’t the mask to protect others and not the wearer?

[quote fireflylanegirls]@wtfisgoingonhere21

Could you perhaps wear your mask at your desk when people get too close?

Isn’t the mask to protect others and not the wearer?[/quote]
It would send a clear signal about your discomfort though.

@fireflylanegirls @LouiseTrees

Thats exactly my thinking.
It sends a clear message of your in ease that can't be missed.

This is anxiety. You need to recognise that.

Your colleagues have worked together this way for a whole year. And this is the reality of it....

"12 of us in my office.
Desks are distanced, windows open, plenty of sanitiser and wipes."

Very very little risk. There's 12 of you. 12. Extremely unlikely anything bad will happen.

This IS an anxiety issue and not a COVID issue. This is at least the third thread of people telling you this. You are having medical help telling this. You need to be firm with your mind about the importance of dealing with reality.

[quote fireflylanegirls]@wtfisgoingonhere21

Could you perhaps wear your mask at your desk when people get too close?

Isn’t the mask to protect others and not the wearer?[/quote]
Wear an FFP2 mask or better (one which protects the wearer) rather than a bit of cloth

You can talk to your manger about it. Quit. And look for a job wfh.

@JeanClaudeVanDammit

This isn’t an anxiety issue though.

I just don’t feel safe in the office.

But it’s your anxiety making you not feel safe in the office. So it’s absolutely an anxiety issue. Honestly now you’re vaccinated your (already very small) risk from Covid has plummeted.

Hmm, this is not right.

I get what people are trying to say, but covid is real, so the OP is not imagining things.

OP - the biggest thing is you are vaccinated. I don't think your office sounds great tbh, but for vaccinated person it is ok. I would focus on your vaccination.

you colleagues need to socially distance op, keep your distance and inform a manager.
no one is immune from having to socially distance

people you work with will also be anxious, you are not alone op.