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Original poster

I’ve written my notice. Someone tell me I’ve done the right thing...

591 replies

readyplayer2 · 27/02/2021 15:06

I’m due back to work in 4 weeks time after being on maternity leave for 14 months.

I work in a large office and my employer throughout the whole pandemic hasn’t sent anyone to work from home!

I’m 35 have a BMI of 40 and I’m asthmatic, I also have psoriasis for which I am unmedicated.

I’ve been extremely careful, limiting social contact, avoiding supermarkets etc since last year.

I’ve written to my employer as asked if I can wfh but today have received a written response to my request which states that due to business requirements, I will need to be back into the office.

I’m due to work 3 days a week and my son will go to nursery.

I’ve weighed up my risks and I feel like it’s too much of a risk me being in the office and my son being at nursery.

My husband wfh and has done since last March!

I feel like my son would benefit so much from nursery but I just don’t think it’s worth the risk to me, especially if it means I could leave him without a mother.

I was hoping I would be vaccinated by the time I go back to work but I haven’t heard a single thing, I had a Drs appointment last week and they confirmed I am group 6 and need to wait my turn.

I can’t extend my return to work date as I’ve already done this and used all of my annual leave allowance.

Hate what Covid has done to us all :(

OP posts:
Original poster
readyplayer2 · 27/02/2021 15:36

@CherryFox

If you really can't do it then in your shoes I'd sooner get signed of with stress than resign. I think you'll be fine though, it's only a month or two before everything starts becoming more normal.

I thought that, I was going to speak to my Gp and ask to be signed off, but then I worry that will leave a black mark against my name and won’t look good if I then return.

OP posts:
CandyLeBonBon · 27/02/2021 15:38

I wouldn't op. The job market is brutal and it's a bad idea to relinquish the security of long term employment for something that might not even happen! Honestly you'll be vaccinated soon enough.

MrsBrunch · 27/02/2021 15:38

If the office is covid secure they have done all they need to.

Ask what measures they have taken. There should be a floor plan with work stations 2m plus apart. Masks worn, windows open, sanitiser available. If they are doing all that the risk is miniscule.

Nith · 27/02/2021 15:38

The letter states the office is Covid secure but I don’t know what procurers are in place as I haven’t been in the office for 14 months.

Try asking them?

Honestly, it seems mad to consider giving up your job for the sake of what may well be only a week or two before you are vaccinated.

NoGoodPunsLeft · 27/02/2021 15:39

@Kalllop

Didn’t you post the other day?
This definitely sounds familiar.

Most of the comments on the other thread were the same as this... you'd be mad to quit.

You are assuming you'll definitely get it which isn't guaranteed at all. My office was covid secure, desks half blocked off so 50% of staff in, masks for walking round, cafe shut, o don't know anyone who passed it on at work.

You should hopefully be vaccinated by the time you do back, if not it won't be long.

I agree with speaking to colleagues or going in for a KIT day to see what it's actually like.

Also nurseries haven't been shown to be a hot bed of infection so it's hopefully low risk your DS going

milktoothmayhem · 27/02/2021 15:39

You will be vaccinated pretty soon and you mentioned you are going to send the lo to nursery, surely that will be the same risk as you being at a covid secure office. What I'm trying to say is, if you like your work in general, there is going to be an unemployment bloodbath soon and I will recommend to stay in work or maybe just tell your employer that you want to come back to the office as soon as you are vaccinated within the next few weeks.

MuthaFunka61 · 27/02/2021 15:40

Try the online booking system. Just put in your details and if you're eligible the system'll let you book,if it doesn't let you book today try again tomorrow.

www.nhs.uk/book-a-coronavirus-vaccination/do-you-have-an-nhs-number

thewinkingprawn · 27/02/2021 15:40

I definitely would not, not in this job market. If it was me I would take the chance - the vast majority of people in your situation would have it very mildly and it is less and less likely you will catch it. I would call your GP and ask if under the circumstances they can get you vaccinated but I would certainly not give up my job for conditions that have only just been put on the list.

DelphiniumBlue · 27/02/2021 15:40

I think you are being over anxious.
There is evidence to suggest that asthma sufferers are not more at risk from Covid, possilby something to do with the medication they already take? If your asthma was that bad, you would have been higher up the vaccination list.
If you are really worried about your risk, best thing you can do would be to reduce your BMI, you could lose enough weight in a few weeks to put you into a lower BMI risk group.
Meanwhile, just pointing out that all nurseries are opening now, most workplaces will be opening up soon, schools are back in a few weeks, some of us have been working in schools throughout. I think you are letting your anxieties get the better of you. It's not a good time to make yourself voluntarily unemployed.

WhateverJudy · 27/02/2021 15:41

And going back to work with the idea implanted that you have to cover all child’s sickness because your husband earns more....just no. He’s 50% a parent and the earning gap will only increase if you do all the parenting. I wish women would push back on this and stop enabling men to opt out of parenting.

thewinkingprawn · 27/02/2021 15:42

And please don’t get signed off for stress - that is an actual condition that should not be used just because you don’t want to go into the office. Having told them you don’t want to go in, then having said no and you then getting signed off with stress will most certainly put a place mark against your name.

DoubleDessertPlease · 27/02/2021 15:42

@Equalityumber

Is your office Covid secure? If you’re in the shielding group you could speak to your HR department about needing to stay home.
Unfortunately there’s no such thing as a “Covid secure” office. A few perplex panels and distance between desks are unlikely to make any difference to airborne transmission, especially if there’s unfiltered aircon. Read the cdc or other scientific sites for the evidence, e.g.

jkms.org/DOIx.php?id=10.3346/jkms.2020.35.e415

I think it’s really poor employers like this are putting office working before their employees health and wellbeing. Hopefully you’ll have the jab soon and have to avoid any difficult decisions.

CherryFox · 27/02/2021 15:43

I thought that, I was going to speak to my Gp and ask to be signed off, but then I worry that will leave a black mark against my name and won’t look good if I then return.

With respect, I don't think your fears are proportional and if your mental health is leading you to quit your job then speaking to your GP is absolutely the right thing to do. Job aside, you can get help with your anxieties, which appear to be the crux of the issue here.

thewinkingprawn · 27/02/2021 15:43

Black mark not place mark

Original poster
readyplayer2 · 27/02/2021 15:44

@WhateverJudy

And going back to work with the idea implanted that you have to cover all child’s sickness because your husband earns more....just no. He’s 50% a parent and the earning gap will only increase if you do all the parenting. I wish women would push back on this and stop enabling men to opt out of parenting.
@WhateverJudy

He’s not opting out of parenting, he’s in a much higher position in a higher paid job.

It would make no sense for us to lose a days wake from his salary for childcare.

OP posts:
slidingdrawers · 27/02/2021 15:44

The thing is even when you have been vaccinated there will still be a risk. The vaccination won't provide you or anyone else with 100% protection. People sadly will still become seriously unwell and worse. Your son will be at nursery, that will be a risk to you. I can understand how you feel. You've been in a secure bubble for months but that bubble is going to have to burst sooner or later. Honestly I'd try to pop in if you can. Getting your GP to sign you off without even knowing what procedures your employer has put in place will, again, just delay the inevitable.

Original poster
readyplayer2 · 27/02/2021 15:45

a days pay *

OP posts:
Original poster
readyplayer2 · 27/02/2021 15:47

@slidingdrawers

The thing is even when you have been vaccinated there will still be a risk. The vaccination won't provide you or anyone else with 100% protection. People sadly will still become seriously unwell and worse. Your son will be at nursery, that will be a risk to you. I can understand how you feel. You've been in a secure bubble for months but that bubble is going to have to burst sooner or later. Honestly I'd try to pop in if you can. Getting your GP to sign you off without even knowing what procedures your employer has put in place will, again, just delay the inevitable.
@slidingdrawers

I know, I think the nursery scares me more than me being back in the office.

I don’t have any other option for childcare.
He will have to go to nursery if I’m going to work.

OP posts:
GintyMcGinty · 27/02/2021 15:47

I don't think you are being proportionate about your risks. I think you find out more about what Covid Secure means? As for more information and ask them to carry out a risk assessment for your return.

I am group 6 myself and I wouldn't give up my job for this and certainly not without knowing all the facts.

OverweightPidgeon · 27/02/2021 15:47

Could you use a KIT day to go into the office to see what precautions they’ve made ?

Original poster
readyplayer2 · 27/02/2021 15:47

@GintyMcGinty

I don't think you are being proportionate about your risks. I think you find out more about what Covid Secure means? As for more information and ask them to carry out a risk assessment for your return.

I am group 6 myself and I wouldn't give up my job for this and certainly not without knowing all the facts.

@GintyMcGinty

But what if you had a small child in nursery?

OP posts:
SkeletonSkins · 27/02/2021 15:47

If this were met there’s no way I’d not be going back to work. I’d be careful about using hand sanitiser, wearing my mask, keeping my distance etc but the risk must be tiny, and will only last a couple of weeks,

Also, for what it’s worth, and this might not be popular, I’d be doing everything in my power to get my BMI down ASAP, not just to reduce the tiny tiny risk that covid might have but also the much bigger risk from other health conditions. I say this as someone that’s gone from the ‘obese’ category to just on the cusp of healthy, with PCOS, and finding it hard to lose weight. I’m still going though for my own health and those that need me around.

GintyMcGinty · 27/02/2021 15:48

sorry for the typos

DishingOutDone · 27/02/2021 15:48

So the thread from last week was deleted I think, and isn't this you again OP?

Original poster
readyplayer2 · 27/02/2021 15:48

@OverweightPidgeon

Could you use a KIT day to go into the office to see what precautions they’ve made ?
@OverweightPidgeon

I don’t want to go in sooner than I have to. 🙁

OP posts: