The amount of posters who want support bubbles banned is shocking...

[ToHellinahandbasket]

And quite frankly appalling.
Is it just me seeing a lot of this?
The many threads about further restrictions seem to all be posters suggesting things that don’t affect them and insisting those be the things that should go.
It’s a real eye opener.

I benefit from a support bubble as my son was under one on the 2nd December. I had PND and was already suffering from anxiety due to a previous TFMR which developed into quite bad health anxiety. Without my support bubble I don’t know what would have happened tbh, and I’m still not back to normal now so I dread to think how it will be if they do take them away.

I don’t get takeaway coffee but I’m not shouting from the rooftops for it to be banned. I don’t meet a friend for a socially distanced walk, but I’m not shouting about that either.

There just seems to be a very narrow minded view at the moment, I don’t know if it’s just on here, where people are airily dismissing things without a thought for how it can affect other people or their mental health or situations.

I feel like people bandied together a bit to begin with and now it’s flipped completely. It’s eye opening and seriously depressing.

Is it just on mumsnet do you think? I don’t know what I’m hoping to achieve by posting this tbh I just feel really unsettled by some of the attitudes I’ve seen on here tonight and some of the things I’ve read

I know people are allowed their own opinions, of course and that’s what is great about an online forum, but there seems to be a definite lean one way of late. I even saw a few posters proclaiming we should get the army on the streets to “manage” people and ensure that people don’t break the rules if support bubbles are stopped.

There doesn’t seem to be much compassion left :(

It’s interesting people seemed to have more of an issue with support bubbles than the people who abuse them ....

First pregnancy, partner is stuck overseas for who knows how long so I’m currently living alone .... I’m only drawing on my support bubble in emergencies to try keep down on in-person interactions but I’d be quite stuffed without them .

It’s really disturbing. Thankfully I don’t meet people in real life begging for their own imprisonment

@ToHellinahandbasket
There doesn’t seem to be much compassion left

It does feel like that way sometimes, from all angles (Its so depressing to keep seeing posters spouting shit about 'shielding the vulnerable and letting the rest of us crack on'...)

There's also a lot of hyperbole.

Sometimes I just have to take a break from Mumsnet because I do think it skews everything, and without seeing people in real life (well outside of my own bubble) it's easy to feel as though everyone feels that way.

Sometimes I just try and rationalise it and filter it out and focus on the positive posts, compassionate posts and rational posts.

Hope you are feeling ok

Also , as someone else on her, registering bubbles. Not the dream , but at least could help provide clarity on what was allowed - and possibly a deterrent.

I’m the opposite. I think the law should be simplified so that every household can form a support bubble with one other household. And make it very clear no one should be in multiple bubbles (so you wouldn’t be able to have a support bubble and a childcare bubble under my hypothetical legislation). Being able to share the burdens of lockdown with another household would be transformative for many people - especially now they’re attempting to WFH and supervise homeschooling again.

My partners ex is a prime example. She WFH and her boyfriend WFH in separate households - they both have children. He goes to hers each weekend - she is his bubble (I think they missed the lives alone bit). His children are adults and one lives with him the other visits. The one that lives with him has a boyfriend that she sees and she also has a single friend in a bubble (because friend is lonely and depressed) but friend lives with parent. No idea what the other does but doesn't live there and visits. The ex wife has 1 adult child and 1 age 17. The 17 year old goes out with his friends (but he only sees 2 of them in their homes). . The 20 year old is in a bubble with his girlfriend who lives with her family. One of the brothers has his own bubble with his girlfriend. The ex girlfriend is a professional woman and very nice - no angst but you can see how much mixing is going on.

Anyway my son is CEV so I stopped seeing my partner since his 2 children visit. I cannot take a chance since there are so many bubbles going on. He thinks I am being unreasonable but his sons mix with his ex who mixes with her current who mixes with his children etc.... none sound unreasonable on their own BUT look at how many are mixing! This is the problem and I imagine they are not alone.

@Treatscatscrave

Hi people, look I hate hate this lockdown but it IS going to get harsher as the government have lost total control of this now.

Here is my advice for those living alone: you MUST MUST see your GP ( by 'see' I mean over phone) and get them to say you are depressed or whatever.
Basically, you need to be one step ahead of this now. We all do.

Don't wait, get your ducks in a row.

My hope is that they'll only go as far as a database where you enter the details of your bubble to cut down on people bending the rules.

That would be a deterrent.

Overall, we are heading for a fascistic regime here. It happens incrementally. We ARE not that far from people getting shot on the street. You better believe it.

You think this country's above that? Think all those German people pre-emptive wars were less sophisticated than us? No, they were n't

Oh give over. We're a long way from getting shot in the streets.

Support bubbles are necessary, where we have an issue is with the minority who are abusing them by having multiple support bubbles.

There was a thread on here the other day where someone mentioned that an elderly relative had had the virus recently and it had then ripped through the entire extended family, 5 or 6 households worth. How? The only way that can happen is if all of those households were in close contact with each other.

I have people I know through DDs school who have support bubbles (even if neither party is a single adult), childcare bubbles, under 1yo support bubbles and caring duties all of which just seem to entail going to each other's house for dinner and cups of tea whenever they want or making trips to the 'essential' shops as a large group but no childcare or caring activities.

However having said that, I have no idea, beyond increased strength of messaging, what actually can be done to enforce it as we do not have the appetite or police force to barge into homes all over the place issuing fines.

People are cruel. Stepping away from the witches here helped me.

I don't think support bubbles should go. I think they are an important lifeline for many.

However, when I had 2 children under 2, a husband who worked away a lot and zero support, all the other parents of young children I knew (most of whom had various family members taking the children at least once a week) seemed entirely unable to understand how difficult I found it and made me feel bad that I wasn't (unsurprisingly) finding things so easy as them.

Similar deal with those who had family childcare and got frequent time off/nights out as their family babysat. Totally different if you have to juggle it all yourself (and can't afford a paid babysitter).

So, I don't want support bubbles to go, and of course this shouldn't be a case of sinking to the lowest common denominator, but I really hope this crisis is making those who usually have loads of help on tap think about those people they know that are always in the position of having no support - and perhaps being a little bit more empathetic.

Once my DD goes back to uni this week (she has to - can’t study at home) then I will be completely alone again.

I can’t bubble with my boyfriend.

If people are going to have bubbles they need to obey the law.

Bubbles should not be banned, but they do need to be made more clearer!
The amount of people that I know that have a bubble for everything on the bubbles criteria ALL AT ONCE!
We are bubbled up with my single fil who is nearly 70.
I have disabled children who tbh would benefit from having a support bubble to help me with them while husband is at work (has no choice he is a critical worker).
But it is what it is and fil needs interaction, I'm sticking to the rules to keep us and everyone safe!
Personal responsibility guys thats what it boils down to.

Yep I will not be following the rules if all support bubbles are banned. I will not let my 75 year old mother live in total isolation for weeks on end. That is in humane.

I think it’s better to tighten up on the number of bubbles people have and also where people are taking the piss. One friend has bubbled with a single mum friend which is fair enough. But the single mum friend has her mum as another support bubble. And my friend has kept both her own parents and her PILs as ‘childcare bubbles’ even though she doesn’t work and every time she sees them she doesn’t actually use them for childcare per se (like she doesn’t leave her boys with them while she’s doing other things) she just uses it as a way to have some company and for the kids to see their grandparents. She is breaking the rules obviously but just says it as ‘we’ve kept two childcare bubbles rather than one’. But they’re not even childcare bubbles, they don’t provide childcare.

I wouldn't be surprised if people were paid to post on here about how support bubbles have been abused to drum up the next hate campaign in order to tighten up the rules without a huge backlash for when it happens.

And no I haven’t been paid... a lot of people are breaking the rules though, but by a small enough margin that they feel it’s justified.

I won’t break the rules. At all.

I haven’t had anyone here since dd came home from uni for Christmas because she is an adult.

I haven’t seen my elder children because they are adults in relationships.

Once DD goes I will be completely on my own. I can’t see my boyfriend. Thank god for FaceTime.

Too many are taking the piss, something has to change. It's like the masks, a small minority are genuinely exempt, but it's everyone who jumps on the bandwagon and won't wear one.

The government have tried to be fair to people here only to have it thrown back in their face. No wonder they're annoyed given the hospital situation.

The government have tried to treat the public like grown adults.

Overall, we are heading for a fascistic regime here. It happens incrementally. We ARE not that far from people getting shot on the street. You better believe it.

See what I mean by hyperbole...

I think that concluding that anyone who doesn't agree with you must be a paid plant is going too far. And shows just how toxic the division can become.

I also think that seeing the necessity for a step is not the same as calling for it because you want it. When the biggest risk comes from contact between households, scrutinising where contact occurs and bearing down on it is the way to get the change that is so urgently needed.

As I said, ideally before hospitals buckle. Which too many are worryingly close to doing

I think a lot of the craziest posts here are from people genuinely suffering with anxiety who have lost all sense of proportionality. Unfortunately they get a group of them together and send each other into a spiral.

Most people understand that a support bubble is a necessity when you have a newborn, just like most people understand that you cannot actually work from home and look after a toddler, and that its not humane or even feasible to lock up elderly single adults in a home and post them food parcels.

If support bubbles go, I will be breaking the rules. It’s a simple as that. I have a toddler and a newborn. Who I'm alone with all day except for weekends. My mental health is on the floor most days. My poor toddler just sees a sad mummy all of the time now.
I need that extra help a support bubble provides.
For anyone that will say I shouldn’t have had a baby during this, I was pregnant going into the the first lockdown so it was too late.

School was vital to us and that’s gone. That was like my kids support bubble.

Now things might happen that start affecting you instead, now your not so keen on all the measures.

Serves these people right! Maybe now they will be less keen to so easily give up ALL of there rights.

feasible to lock up elderly single adults in a home and post them food parcels

The elderly were never locked up, not did they receive food parcels

The CEV/shielded did, but that group was not based on age but on comorbidity. I’m sorry for sounding petulant but I am sick of correcting this inaccuracy months after I was first asked to shield

Overall, we are heading for a fascistic regime here. It happens incrementally. We ARE not that far from people getting shot on the street. You better believe it

Time to supercharge your Fakebook feed with something other than conspiracy theorists. I suggest you watch cat videos. Far safer.

@Ifyoulikepinacoladaa

Please go and see your GP or talk to a HV. That sounds so far from OK that you would benefit from professional input. You can't always see that when you're the one going through it, but it is always better to seek help early.

@Heartlantern2
School was vital to us and that’s gone. That was like my kids support bubble.

I have to say that this really resonates with me. Going to school is absolutely vital for my DC and they will not cope with online learning for more than a few weeks.