There is nothing in my children’s lives

[Howdydooo]

It’s all been taken away again.

I know it’s a pandemic. I know it’s temporary (but don’t know how temporary).

Screens are no substitute for friends.

They will not be fooled again by home structure and schooling. They have nowhere to go, no one to see and nowhere to go. And they know how long it went on for last time.

Fembot found it

MEV-1, the film’s fictional virus, is modelled upon the bat-borne Nipah virus, which was identified in 1999 when an outbreak caused brain and lung disease in pigs and people in Malaysia. In the film, MEV-1 kills people within days, but in real life the incubation period for Nipah – and many deadly viruses – is more like two weeks.

Read more: www.newscientist.com/article/2239913-how-realistic-is-contagion-the-movie-doesnt-skimp-on-science/#ixzz6inUNQFqt

I haven’t read all the comment so apologies if I’m repeating..
This really is hard for a certain age range of children/young adults.
They are not really at risk themselves and are at a time in their lives when they are programmed to be fundamentally selfish. Lots of them can understand the need to protect immediate family but they don’t all have positive relationships with older generations so why should they care?
Comparing it to conditions for previous generations is also problematic. It’s all very well saying that countless generations managed without but they never knew anything different!
Countless generations also managed without electricity and central heating. We’d all be pretty depressed if they suddenly didn’t exist.
Most of the kids dealing with this now will be feeling pretty shit right now.
History shows that, luckily, most of them will cope and come out the other side.
That doesn’t make the next few months any more fun.

Children can still go for walks with their friends - one at a time, it's true. And the weather isn't great now, but it's still possible. And they need to get out of the house and exercise.

It isn’t great but it’s not terrible. It’s easier to go with the flow. Our kids look to us how to react.
If it helps here are some things we do around school work.
Board games
Jigsaws
Twister
Mad get it all out dancing
Fitness workouts - all of us
Yoga - all of us - very badly
Letters to friends.
Cook along zoom calls with friends.
Chat about nothing zoom calls.
Creative writing with supporting artwork sometimes
Mediation with headspace app
Baking/cooking together
Very amateurish renovation projects together such as painting a room, in another painting a mural, upholstering an old chair, sanding down and revarnishing an old table

Card games
A walk every day
Choose clothes for each other
Family meetings
Control days - one person gets to dictate what happens the whole day.
Finding care packages for friends, family - even just a box of biscuits or pack of tea.
Cry openly if needed - every emotion is ok. It’s hard not to see family. Hard for all of us. Big hugs to everyone.

[quote MarshaBradyo]Fembot found it

MEV-1, the film’s fictional virus, is modelled upon the bat-borne Nipah virus, which was identified in 1999 when an outbreak caused brain and lung disease in pigs and people in Malaysia. In the film, MEV-1 kills people within days, but in real life the incubation period for Nipah – and many deadly viruses – is more like two weeks.

Read more: www.newscientist.com/article/2239913-how-realistic-is-contagion-the-movie-doesnt-skimp-on-science/#ixzz6inUNQFqt[/quote]
Oooh interesting! I can’t believe wet markets were allowed to open again it’ll literally be the death of us one day.

This is where I feel so so grateful to have so many kids! My nephew lives with us. my son is 20 so him and my 18 yr nephew have each other. Then my daughters are 14 and 12 so have each other then my youngest 2 are 7 and 5 so again are together doing everything from home learning to playing. Suddenly all the comments about being mad to have so many children doesnt make me feel as shit as it used to. I can't imagine what it must be like for only children or those that aren't close in age. I just can't relate. They have actually loved the whole thing/time spent together so we have been so so lucky. Even for birthdays/new-years eve we got to have what felt like party's as there is enough of us. I'm so sad for familys that don't have that. I pray this time is over quickly for you guys in that situation

In Contagion at least it was over after 9 months

Boisterous football mad boys who be outside running off energy aren't going to choose someone else's clothes or creat artwork. Some people's kids have a lot more energy than others and need to be with their mates not their mum. Some kids don't like a cosy bubble with their mum.

@farfallarocks

In Contagion at least it was over after 9 months

And 26 million deaths 😂

@farfallarocks

In Contagion at least it was over after 9 months

Wasn’t it 18 months to make vaccine?

@Stay123

Boisterous football mad boys who be outside running off energy aren't going to choose someone else's clothes or creat artwork. Some people's kids have a lot more energy than others and need to be with their mates not their mum. Some kids don't like a cosy bubble with their mum.

Yep that's my ds you're talking about!

OP I know this feels catastrophic for you and your DC, but your DC will be fine. They'll catch up on education and they can chat to friends over zoom. It's not ideal and it's hard sometimes, but they are learning essential resilience and how to cope when life doesn't go as planned.

My DD has been housebound through illness since she was 14. That was 5 years ago and whatever friends she kept left for university last year. She caught Covid in the spring, her condition worsened and now she's been bedbound for 8 months. She still laughs, has a meagre quality of life and we have to focus on what she does have, not what she's lost. It requires huge strength on our part and hers, but we manage it.

Remind your DC what they have and teach them how to cope. They'll learn from how you deal with it and you'll be equipping them with valuable life skills. Then you'll have taken something positive from this utter shitshow and turned it into a benefit.

Having had an education that taught me to be proactive - going to uni at 30, getting my PGCE at 40 with 3 kids and currently in a secondary school with key workers children I see the ‘helicopter’ mothers and parents that want their children spoon fed to tick boxes and use schools as cheap childcare while working all hours to go on holiday and those families who genuinely don’t take free education for granted. Sorry I rattled your cage but I live and breathe this.

@BonnesVacances

OP I know this feels catastrophic for you and your DC, but your DC will be fine. They'll catch up on education and they can chat to friends over zoom. It's not ideal and it's hard sometimes, but they are learning essential resilience and how to cope when life doesn't go as planned.

My DD has been housebound through illness since she was 14. That was 5 years ago and whatever friends she kept left for university last year. She caught Covid in the spring, her condition worsened and now she's been bedbound for 8 months. She still laughs, has a meagre quality of life and we have to focus on what she does have, not what she's lost. It requires huge strength on our part and hers, but we manage it.

Remind your DC what they have and teach them how to cope. They'll learn from how you deal with it and you'll be equipping them with valuable life skills. Then you'll have taken something positive from this utter shitshow and turned it into a benefit.

❤️❤️❤️

I’m a single parent working full time and have been throughout, my daughter is 13 and spend 9 hrs a day on her own due to lockdown i feel so much guilt leaving her but what can I do nothing.
everyone has their own battles to fight during this I wish I was as lucky as u to be able to stay home and be with my child.
I’m lucky that she is trust worthy she will do some school work during the day and she can phone me whenever she likes ( I work a 5 min drive from home so if there was an emergency I could be home quickly ) but I worry about the effects this will have on her mental health

I’ve got boisterous kids. Joint activities let off steam a different way. We do lots of physical activity. They’ve got no choice but to be home with mum and dad. They will survive.

In a strange way, this post has actually made me feel better. Sometimes feel like I’m the only one worrying and upset by all this. Thank you.
Doesn’t make it any easier & I don’t know what else to say, other than.... we are the same. I never imagined we’d be in this position in 2021 (silly me). It’s really quite depressing...

@devilish

I’m a single parent working full time and have been throughout, my daughter is 13 and spend 9 hrs a day on her own due to lockdown i feel so much guilt leaving her but what can I do nothing. everyone has their own battles to fight during this I wish I was as lucky as u to be able to stay home and be with my child. I’m lucky that she is trust worthy she will do some school work during the day and she can phone me whenever she likes ( I work a 5 min drive from home so if there was an emergency I could be home quickly ) but I worry about the effects this will have on her mental health

So hard but not every child will struggle and your DD sounds like mine ☺️ You are doing what you can to keep your family afloat and you should be bloody proud of yourself.

Only read the first few posts but just wanted to add my voice.

Our son is in yr6 and is an only child so is totally alienated. He was really excited to go back to school yesterday to see people.
All of his extra curricular activities have been cancelled.
He plays and chats with friends online but it is no substitute for real life interactions.

We (my husband and I) feel so useless in trying to homeschool and motivate him.

The future is going to be screwed up, imo, for lots of young people.

Outdoor playgrounds are still open this time around, so boisterous kids can still burn off energy there.

I’m sure you will understand that it’s not as bad as it seems. They have a roof over their heads, good and loving parents. No bombs, assume no abuse or outside threats. It’s winter and not summer. They will get through this with your help. Good luck and stay safe.

They can FaceTime or zoom or whatever friends, they can go for walks etc and get exercise, there is nothing to stop you setting them tasks to keep them occupied

It’s a life lesson, lots of use went through tough times for various reasons, including school closures and have come out ok

My personal opinion is this is showing just how spoilt kids are today, expecting everything on a plate and can’t deal with anything out of the ordinary or stops them doing things they believe they are entitled to

If your children are old enough, either encourage them to read or read The Diary of Anne Frank to them, talk to them about how it can help them cope with their feelings if they think about someone much worse off than themselves. It’s a strategy that has served me well and I’m 65. I’ve been through some tough times, my mother dying when I was 9, divorce, unemployment and overcoming drug addiction, but I like to consider myself a survivor. It’s a quality that’s worth trying to install in children. By the way, I don’t for one moment think it’s easy and applaud all you mums and children trying to find your way through this. Xx

There were quite a few cases of teenage suicide in our town before this.
Let’s not play this down or underestimate the impact this may have on lots of children. Many won’t be fine with a walk and a Zoom. It won’t ‘toughen them up’. It could push them over the edge.

I’m not even talking about my children who seem to be ok. But have some empathy and understanding that many children aren’t ok right now.

I’m all for positive attitude but some of these posts lack understanding