Since the 8pm announcement I have...

[ilikexmas]

Cried
Had 3 cups of tea
Finished off the Xmas biscuits ( about 12 biscuits)
Cried again
Stared into space
Wrapped myself tightly in my duvet
Now I feel like crying again but will go to bed.

FML!!!

Went straight upstairs to scream silently and hit pillows
Spent ages looking up university rules
Laughed hysterically for a bit
Messaged a few friends
Went on a solo drive with loud thump-y music
Came home and started planning how to turn bedroom into office
Resigned myself to another night of being up until the early hours

Spoke to my dad in hopes he will understand how serious this is.
Tried to comfort DD and DH. They don't really care.
I feel overwhelmed, almost go from being anxious and stressed and like the world is falling off its axis, to this weird numbness where I'm almost at peace with the fact that I can't make life better now. I don't even feel despair, Its another year just gone.

I went out and bought a lot of sweets, came back and stuffed my chubby little face.

Sat in silence for 2 hours.

I've dragged myself to bed.
I know DD is safer, but I don't know how I'm going to face tomorrow.

Cried.
Watched Bake Off from yesterday.
Made tea.
Came up with the idea of putting coffee syrup in tea.
Decided was genius for putting coffee syrup in tea.
Cried some more.
Went to Sainsbury's.
Walked around aimlessly by the Thames for a bit instead of going straight home with shopping.
More crying.
Yoga with Adrienne.

Drank 4 vodkas and reassured my y11 dd that it will all be fine (even though I have no idea if that is true!).

Video called my friend in NZ. She’s in her beautiful holiday home in Omaha on the beach with her family and a new dog.
It was so nice to see the ocean, the sun, the beach towels...We talked about our London days and made plans for us to see them in their holiday home this year. Trying to be positive

Called my Mum. Texted evil bastard ex-h.

Checked various newspapers for the time it starts (weds am).

Need to check dds books to see what subjects we have in to support any schoolwork.

Glad I’ve got my bike back at least for when I’m not allowed on a bus.

Went on with life as usual, because I'd been good for a change, and put my phone to one side, while spending time with ds (our area was already in lockdown anyway). Ignorance really is bliss. Since I've been online again, and seeing the news, I got the urge to look at early threads about covid.

How different life was then!

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3813759-AIBU-to-ask-you-if-you-are-worried-about-the-new-Coronavirus

Ordered and ate a whole pizza (12in) and chips.

Supposed to be day one of keto. Fuuuck!

In Scotland so had longer to do stuff after the announcement.

Went round to meet daughter, son in law and their kids in their garden, while I could still see them all together.

Drove around aimlessly for a bit feeling depressed.

Bought a coffee and drank it walking up and down the city centre streets, taking a last look at the Christmas lights.

Went home and ordered a load of yarn to keep me busy.

Consoled dh who thinks he's going to be furloughed again.

Drank wine, ate cheese and chocolate.

I dealt with DH having a tantrum. I assume this is due to stress, he owns a hospitality business which is closed for the foreseeable future, but better closed than open and taking £200 in a day.

Cleaned the kitchen, (especially as DH swept everything off the breakfast bar including a bowl of grease) cleaned the Lounge, encouraged DC to clean their rooms as DH on warpath about state of house (on furlough but too special to do housework despite being bored)

Folded laundry and gave to kids to put away.

Was cross DD2 had to go in today, but told her it was great luck that she got to see her friends today.

Let DH go to bed and am now trying to kill time to ensure he is properly asleep before I go to bed.

Thinking about the fact DD1 and I may have our second lockdown birthdays in March

@missmouse101

Guys, come on! Wales has been in full lockdown since December 20th. There wasn't half this angst.

You lot can sing great - cheers you up no end. Once went to Centre Parcs in the middle of your school holidays - ended up with 10 welsh singers going full belt on the train, flipping fab. Our kids loved it too!

I asked whether they were a choir and they laughed - no just a family get together - so jealous of their ability. I think I wouldn't mind so much being locked down in Wales (obviously generalising here).

Had a kebab because why not.

And sat anticipating what crap excuse work will give me tomorrow about why I can't work from home. Entirely possible for my role but didn't allow it in first lockdown so doubtful they will this time.

Really worried for DD17 mental health and I've told work this that I can't leave her alone for prolonged periods of time for fear of what she might do to herself. However I know for all that "were a family", "team player" spiel they don't really actually give a shit.

I cried, then watched tiktok all evening in quiet disbelief. Can't sleep now and have to work in the morning.
If I had a printer I'd print this thread as an example of women's history.

@Helloandhelloagain I'm so very sorry about your mum

Grieving a parent & the end of a relationship at the same time is bloody awful. I went through the same thing at the start of the March lockdown, It'll be sh*t for a while but I promise it does get better, truly, and the pain does fade over time. I hope you manage to find some time to look after yourself.

Had 3 gin and tonics - bye bye dry January
Cuddled my extremely down 14 year old boy who lives for school

Why cry when we all knew what the announcement would be anyway? I was resigned to it - but this situation will not last forever, honestly. We need a firm lockdown to get it under control.

Bought a couple of tablets in the hope it will cut arguments down.
Thought about how I will cope when ex starts being unreasonable... I work with people. This makes me a killer apparently.
Drunk a few beers.
Looked at my fat cat.

Since the 8pm announcement i have... had a trip to A&E! I fell from a ladder onto my back whilst putting Christmas decorations away this afternoon and have been in agony. Fractured my ribs but I'm feeling floaty, the codeine they've given me is kicking in. I've not long got home, wondering if I'll be able to sleep and when will the pain go. I'm needed back at work as colleagues now have to shield or they now have no childcare. I'm trying not to worry about anything else right now. I've had no sick days in several years then this and last week I had to take two days of to have a covid test (negative) due to developing a cough from sinus issues. A&E was quiet but whilst I was in the toilet getting a urine sample a lady was really screaming abuse at the staff, when I came out of the loo security were everywhere and a member of staff was being comforted. It wasn't pleasant and all of the NHS staff couldn't have been nicer, and the A&E receptionist told me she'd just had the vaccine today. Sorry if I'm rambling, must be the painkillers.

@BaconAndAvocado

The thing that was keeping me sane - being able to meet up with one friend outside - has gone..... unless we go jogging together!

You can walk and talk , you don't need to jog though I appreciate you may just have been meeting to sit and talk

When I was having to self-isolate the track and trace chap said lots of people are gardening to stay sane.

For those asking why I'm crying, I'm crying because my dc were really excited to go back to school. One of them went to bed thinking they would see their friends tomorrow. They still don't know they won't.

I'm crying because I will probably loose my job as I cannot work if my dc are at home. I cannot afford private childcare even if it was an option.

I'm crying because I feel suffocated stuck at home most the day looking at the same four walls hearing bickering.

I'm crying because people are dying. Who's next?

I'm crying for all the disadvantaged children who will suffer whilst the schools are closed.

I'm crying for all the adults and children who will suffer domestic violence at home.

I'm crying In anger.

The list goes on but I'm sure you get the point.

Yes, we knew it was coming but it hasn't made it any easier to digest.

I thanked fuck I decided to start an open uni degree this january to have some thing to keep Me busy :)

Also spoke with partner and agreed that although hard there is a much better chance of some normality by spring if we have a long hard lockdown now.... I'll take 2-3 months real hard lockdown over another year of chopping and changing.

Also signed up to be a vaccine marshal volunteer(only little things like directing people and car park managment.... I thought every little will. Help and will get me out the house even if its only a few hours a month.

Barely slept.

I have a foster son with additional needs at a special secondary school. He needs routine and struggles over holidays. He loves school. I got email from Head 10 mins after Boris statement over. Even though he is vulnerable and has EHS plan and a SW Head will not open school to any child. They have 3 children of key workers. I would not mind if they did good online learning but no just 1 1/2 hours each day. I am home and early retired secondary teacher so can teach him myself Maths, Chemistry, Physics and Biology. But I worry because he will only do GCSEs in Maths, and double Science and BTECs in Sport and Food and anything I do with him for the BTECs won't be able to be counted towards assessment as they must be done under school supervision. He is Year 10. As it is his school had no ambition for him and just say if they don't cover work they will just drop back to Entry Levels or Functional Skills. He is more able than those and I just want him to achieve everything he can do. I feel worse as my own children never had to put up with this shit. He trusts me. Tonight I told him he could not go to school tomorrow. He did not make any fuss. He said don't worry CC I like it when you teach me because you explain it to me more. I know he won't be able to do the BTECs and I will be letting him down. I have been up all night unable to sleep. I will complain to school tomorrow but they already think I am a pushy parent.