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Covid

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Original poster

Anyone finding that the responses from people 'in real life' differ wildly from those on here?

96 replies

CrackALack · 29/12/2020 11:04

Is anyone else finding this?

I feel like every single person I know and who I see on SM etc... Has a very different response to those I see on here.

It seems people in my 'real life' simply don't care anymore. I don't know a single person who supports another lockdown or schools closing or some of the more extreme views about enforced house arrest or martial law people seem to love the idea of on here.

If I weren't to read MN I'd have said the govt are lucky to be getting the level of compliance they are getting already and any stricter restrictions will just be ignored by the majority now.

People have had enough of the ever changing guidelines, of their businesses going down the pan, of their jobs being at risk and so on.

I'm not suggesting it isn't selfish, but I think it's unrealistic to expect people to be consistently selfless when they are being affected in so many other ways than just Covid, mental health, financially and so on...

There just seems to be such a stark contrast.

OP posts:

Coasterfan · 29/12/2020 11:10

Every single person on my social media who posted on Boxing Day was breaking Hyde rules. Also real life people I ve talked to about primaries think there is no chance of them being closed and we ll all be back on 4th so yes I would say it’s different in real life.

Coasterfan · 29/12/2020 11:10

*the rules

SideboardOfDoom · 29/12/2020 11:13

Yes, of course. Most people I know in real life are completely over it. I don’t even see it as active defiance; it’s just not on their radar. They just get on with life as best they can broadly within the rules. I don’t know a single person who won’t revert to normal as soon as its permitted.

Waxonwaxoff0 · 29/12/2020 11:17

Yes.

Mumsnet is a fairly middle class place. Many people on here can work from home, or have a SAHP, a buffer of savings and can cope with these restrictions for a long period of time.

In real life I don't know anyone who has followed all the rules all the time because it's not always practical. Including the people I know who work for the NHS.

HopeAndDriftWood · 29/12/2020 11:20

It’s always been the case. I came off here for a bit in March/April/June because of it... It’s one of the very few times where Mumsnet is a complete echo chamber. I expect because a lot of people have hidden the topic, or disappeared while this is going on.

Most people I know just don’t care that much anymore. They’re not trying to break the rules or defy anything, and they’re not denying how bad coronavirus is, they’ve just reached the point at which they’d rather try and carry on with life as best they can.

I only really see support for another hard lockdown, schools to close etc on here. Even from friends who have had to isolate with their kids three or four times already.

Lweji · 29/12/2020 11:21

I think you're mistaking people who post more frequently and loudest on MN for the MN universe.
Even so... I think it's fairly easy to see that MN has a mix of people with different opinions and attitudes.

GoldGreen · 29/12/2020 11:21

I would say Mumsnet is actually very like my MC circle of friends. Lots of outrage at others breaking the rules, but then "bending" themself (so the "oh its ok we went and saw my Mum for xmas day as we have all been isolating for 10 days beforehand etc") and/or pretending they are abiding and doing what they want.

herecomesthsun · 29/12/2020 11:21

My facebook page is full of people behaving very sensibly. As are we.

No one anywhere actually WANTS schools to have to shut, or to be in a pandemic with case figures that might necessitate another lockdown. No one WANTS the pandemic.

However, given the situation we are in, sensible people realise this might have to happen.

People are trying hard to buy local to support local businesses in this situation.

Guess I just know a lot of sensible people?

SinkGirl · 29/12/2020 11:22

Nope. My social media is mostly full of people following the rules and wanting another lockdown, with the odd dissenting voice. Everyone I know well didn’t mix at Christmas, other than one couple spending the day with her father as he lives alone following her mother’s death. Otherwise everyone wants things to improve, and mixing households won’t meet that end so they’ve all done it.

Original poster

CrackALack · 29/12/2020 11:25

I only really see support for another hard lockdown, schools to close etc on here. Even from friends who have had to isolate with their kids three or four times already

I agree.

And every time I read about how much stricter the measures need to be and so on, I just think to myself people are absolutely deluded if they think people will follow it now.

I don't know people who are hugely breaking rules. But I'd say 99% of them are breaking some/calculating what they see as their own risks when it comes to meeting family and friends.

As PP, people seem to be so over it now and I don't see that changing no matter how damning the next briefing is or whatever. People just don't care anymore from what I can see.

Like the people who think this will be going on until 2023/24. It's ridiculous. You'd be lucky to get 1% of the nation complying with restrictions by that point imo.

OP posts:

secretllama · 29/12/2020 11:26

Yes. In Scotland we've not been allowed people in our houses since Sept. I dont know a single person who is following this to the letter. Everyone I know from a wide range of backgrounds thinks its becoming pointless, too far etc. They are being sensible but also not allowing the government to tell them they can't visit family. Myself included.

Then I come on here and find many people with very different views which I just don't see in real life.

Original poster

CrackALack · 29/12/2020 11:26

@Lweji

I think you're mistaking people who post more frequently and loudest on MN for the MN universe. Even so... I think it's fairly easy to see that MN has a mix of people with different opinions and attitudes.

Yes obviously. I am aware it's not one huge voice on here. But there are definitely more threads about hard lockdowns, selfish rule breakers, people not leaving their houses since February, washing shopping etc...than I've ever seen anywhere else.

OP posts:

Original poster

CrackALack · 29/12/2020 11:28

And the people I'm talking about include all sorts, NHS workers, teachers, police officers and so on...

OP posts:

WorraLiberty · 29/12/2020 11:28

I think people are just less honest on Mumsnet because they know they'd get flamed to a crisp for admitting to breaking the rules, despite being able to admit it anonymously.

Any anonymous poll would be interesting. Something like 'YABU = Yes I've broken the rules and 'YANBU = No I haven't.

WorraLiberty · 29/12/2020 11:29

*An

SpuriouserAndSpuriouser · 29/12/2020 11:29

I’m a hospital doctor, a lot of my friends are also doctors or work in healthcare so I would say that in my “real life” I actually see a lot more support for further lockdowns and restrictions than I do on here, and for good reason.

The covid situation is now as bad as it was at the first peak in the spring, but with a massive backlog of patients with other conditions who need treatment, no public support, and additional winter pressures. We are also still a few weeks away from the peak this time. We don’t have the luxury of being “over it” or not caring any more. The situation is absolutely dire so please, please take the restrictions seriously.

inquietant · 29/12/2020 11:29

I think the people you 'see' either in real life or on sm are not representative either.

Real time data is showing considerable drop in movements in tier 3/4 areas. Pubs/shops etc report vastly lower spending. Opinion polling shows high majority support for measures.

We all exist in little sub-bubbles of society. For example my workplace has its own culture - compliance is generally very high, with many not even doing as much as is allowed.

OverTheRubicon · 29/12/2020 11:30

Lots of people I know shouting for tighter rules, but only the ones that don't inconvenience them (retired people wanting to shut schools, parents saying to shut pubs etc etc), and/or judging others for rule bending but seeing themselves as the exception. Massive lack of empathy all round!

Can't blame people in a way, we're all tired and some of us have suffered a lot more than others. But I bet that half of the posters shouting on here about tighter rules are either not following them in RL, are at high risk (or health anxious), and/or lucky enough to be relatively unaffected by requirements to WFH and homeschool.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 29/12/2020 11:32

I’m over it all too! We were moved into into tier 4 right before Xmas and my widowed MIL no longer able to visit for Xmas lunch. If the kids don’t go back to school in Jan we will all be devastated.

damnthemanatee · 29/12/2020 11:34

Among my friends and family I see people mostly being fairly compliant. There has been some bending of rules, like seeing family on Boxing Day instead of Christmas Day which makes no material difference.

But then I have a lot of health and social care workers in my social group so maybe that's why. Maybe they have more of a sense of social responsibility and also realise their exposure risks are higher anyway.

OpheliasCrayon · 29/12/2020 11:39

Absolutely. I'm a teacher. All my colleagues and friends who are also teachers want schools open. As do i. All of their friends etc tell them the same.
I don't know anyone who has followed all the rules at any point, everyone including myself has broken at least some. Same for all their friends . So my wider network also - ie anyone I could find out anything about, have all broken some rules.
I don't know anyone who has ever supported lockdowns
I don't know anyone who will take the vaccination when offered. (and I won't either as I have serious allergies)
MN is on the whole polar opposite to reality and is the only place I could think of where I could find people who have followed the rules, support lockdowns or want schools to close.

rooarsome · 29/12/2020 11:39

My parents are very scared and so follow all the rules, want another lockdown etc etc. Apart from them I don't know a single person who feels the same way

OverTheRubicon · 29/12/2020 11:45

@GhoulWithADragonTattoo

Me too. And it sounds that you, like me and so many others have followed the rules even when they've been hard, and will probably follow the next lot too. I just don't understand the enthusiasm I sometimes see on here for them. It's like instead of being sad for themselves or others who will suffer but resigned to the reality, quite a lot of posters practically welcome the opportunity for more restrictions, more judging, more pain for so many people - as if they want a NZ-style solution when sadly the UK has gone so far beyond that point and we have to deal in least-worsts now.

TheAlphaandtheOmega · 29/12/2020 11:45

Real life is nothing like on here, I think that people were being careful before Christmas as they were visiting relatives and obviously didn't want to be ill but now Christmas is out the way no one cares any more, certainly not wanting lockdowns like on here, though I do think that a few on MN have very big voices which does skew it a bit, they regularly turn up on threads like wailing banshees

unicornparty · 29/12/2020 11:46

I've followed all the rules and so have my friends. We all now work from home and don't know anyone that's been furloughed.
I'm sure some people around me must be breaking the rules but I'm not aware of it.

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