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Original poster

Making isolating 13 yr old not leave her room for 10 days!!

565 replies

novaparty12 · 14/12/2020 18:43

My niece is 13 and on Friday she was told to isolate by her school as the girl she sits next to tested positive. She lives in London where transmission is really high. I spoke to MIL today who said that my SIL has told her she is not allowed out of her room apart from going to the toilet or having a shower. All meals are left outside her door for her to collect and my SIL went shopping and spend £50 on snacks and drinks so she doesn't have to leave her room. MIL is really worried about her she keeps phoning her in tears. My SIL is autistic and takes everything very very seriously but surely confining a 13 yr old to her room for 10 days is going a bit far isn't it??

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OliveTree75 · 15/12/2020 09:31

There's some utter bullshit on this thread. If this is how people are reacting to their child being a close contact I would hate to see how they would respond if they actually tested positive!!! Children of any age should not be confined to their rooms alone, and before covid we would have all said this is cruel!

RickOShay · 15/12/2020 09:33

Oh well. Dd had to isolate due to a contact from sixth form. She did take a covid test as we all caught a cold, but it was negative. She stayed at home, but she didn’t spend the entire time in her bedroom!
Nobody who had to isolate from that contact went on to develop corona as far as we know.
The rest of us did NOT self isolate. School and work as normal.

DameFanny · 15/12/2020 09:33

@TrustTheGeneGenie so she's patronising and judgemental, but someone following medical advice is intolerably cruel. Right... Hmm

Bollss · 15/12/2020 09:44

[quote DameFanny]@TrustTheGeneGenie so she's patronising and judgemental, but someone following medical advice is intolerably cruel. Right... Hmm[/quote]
They're not following medical advice. This has not been advised.

OliveTree75 · 15/12/2020 09:48

[quote DameFanny]@TrustTheGeneGenie so she's patronising and judgemental, but someone following medical advice is intolerably cruel. Right... Hmm[/quote]
That isn't the advice. And even if it was, I still wouldn't be doing it!

Holyrivolli · 15/12/2020 09:53

Wow. There are some utterly paranoid adults who really seem to be revelling in children’s misery. The utter lack of sympathy for mental health issues that covid is causing in children who are not at risk from covid makes me even less caring if some of these adults do catch it. There is no way that I’d shut a child away in their bedroom isolated from their family on the small chance that they have an illness which even if they had it would have little chance of doing them and us little harm. And no I simply don’t care enough about your 85yo uncle Bob to put us through that. Sure it’s sad if he dies but me putting my child through two weeks of isolation is not going to prevent that.

MessAllOver · 15/12/2020 09:53

Reading this thread makes me think I'd better start training up my 3 yo to use the remote control, make pot noodles using an instant kettle without scalding himself and put on rubber gloves to clean the loo with bleach after using it. Pre-pandemic, I'm not sure those things would have been considered good parenting... how things change Confused.

Is there a cut off point for age? For example, we're ok with five year olds... what about 4? And what if the child just refuses to stay in their room... are you allowed to lock them in? It is a global pandemic, after all...

OliveTree75 · 15/12/2020 09:58

@MessAllOver

Reading this thread makes me think I'd better start training up my 3 yo to use the remote control, make pot noodles using an instant kettle without scalding himself and put on rubber gloves to clean the loo with bleach after using it. Pre-pandemic, I'm not sure those things would have been considered good parenting... how things change Confused.

Is there a cut off point for age? For example, we're ok with five year olds... what about 4? And what if the child just refuses to stay in their room... are you allowed to lock them in? It is a global pandemic, after all...

Apparently cruelty is allowed during the pandemic so I think the safest option would be to lock them in with a bucket and some none perishables!
DameFanny · 15/12/2020 10:07

@TrustTheGeneGenie @OliveTree75 the advice is to distance from people identified as contacts of a positive case so yes, this is medical advice. Try the NHS website for more.

bookworm14 · 15/12/2020 10:08

It’s funny how child and adolescent mental health, which was such a pressing concern pre-covid, is now not an issue at all, and any child who objects to being shut in their room for 10 days is now a ‘spoilt snowflake’.

OliveTree75 · 15/12/2020 10:10

[quote DameFanny]**@TrustTheGeneGenie* @OliveTree75 the advice is to distance from people identified as contacts of a positive case so yes, this is* medical advice. Try the NHS website for more.[/quote]
Distance

SleepyGirly · 15/12/2020 10:11

@1990shopefulftm

I didn't leave my room except for quick trip to the toilet for 6 days at that age when I got swine flu. My sister was a few weeks old so my mum was terrified of her getting it and just left food outside my door for that time but I was fine so some children that age would be doing it and I wouldn't see it as abusive just that the family could be scared of what effects it could have if other people in the house got it.

However I m not autistic, although my sister is so given that perhaps depending on their child's need it isn't the best thing to have done.

You were actually sick though! I also had swine flu when I was a young teenager. My youngest brother was in Year 1. I struggled to get out of bed, but my parents didn’t tell me not to leave my room. They didn’t leave a tray of food outside my door. That is child abuse.

I also had covid19 (horrific hacking cough and very lightheaded were my symptoms) and I was more ill from swine flu. No one isolated me in a room and told me not to leave.

OliveTree75 · 15/12/2020 10:11

Oops posted too soon. Distance, not confine to a room. They're not the same. And presumably most people would realise that you can't distance from children.

TramaDollface · 15/12/2020 10:13

I’m currently waiting for my son to find out if he has to isolate. If he does we will all do it together. It’s cruel otherwise.

Bollss · 15/12/2020 10:13

[quote DameFanny]**@TrustTheGeneGenie* @OliveTree75 the advice is to distance from people identified as contacts of a positive case so yes, this is* medical advice. Try the NHS website for more.[/quote]
Distance, not isolate.

DameFanny · 15/12/2020 10:18

Oh just read the sodding guidance and stop trying to tweeze apart the words so you can find an excuse to pretend the measures necessary in a pandemic are torture under the human rights act Biscuit

DameFanny · 15/12/2020 10:21

@bookworm14

It’s funny how child and adolescent mental health, which was such a pressing concern pre-covid, is now not an issue at all, and any child who objects to being shut in their room for 10 days is now a ‘spoilt snowflake’.
Child, adolescent and adult mental health is still a very pressing, very underfunded concern, and is only being worsened by the divisive posturing of the 'i was worse with swine flu' and 'nothing justifies these interventions' crowd
Bollss · 15/12/2020 10:21

@DameFanny

Oh just read the sodding guidance and stop trying to tweeze apart the words so you can find an excuse to pretend the measures necessary in a pandemic are torture under the human rights act Biscuit
We have read it. Hence we know you're wrong.
bellinisurge · 15/12/2020 10:21

In Manchester. Had two bouts of isolation orders. We did it as a family unit/household and worked it out together. Anything else is cruel, frankly.

Bollss · 15/12/2020 10:22

Child, adolescent and adult mental health is still a very pressing, very underfunded concern, and is only being worsened by the divisive posturing of the 'i was worse with swine flu' and 'nothing justifies these interventions' crowd

But not worsened by being shut in a room alone for 10 days? Not worsened by knowing your parents care more about the wellbeing of strangers than your own wellbeing? Really?

DameFanny · 15/12/2020 10:24

If you've read it, you'll know the advice is for a younger child to be isolated with a parent, for an older child to stay apart, for bathrooms etc to be cleaned after use. No?

GrumpyHoonMain · 15/12/2020 10:25

Just call your sil and say your DN can isolate at yours and then pick her up. This seems to be misinformation combined with anxiety but if you think your sil won’t listen to the facts then intervene.

DameFanny · 15/12/2020 10:26

Staying in your room, having meals brought to you, talking to your parent(s), reading, watching TV, knowing you're doing a public good - no, I don't think this worsens mental health if the teen in question is currently stable, and the parents aren't telling them they're being tortured and they should feel dreadful.

Bollss · 15/12/2020 10:34

@DameFanny

Staying in your room, having meals brought to you, talking to your parent(s), reading, watching TV, knowing you're doing a public good - no, I don't think this worsens mental health if the teen in question is currently stable, and the parents aren't telling them they're being tortured and they should feel dreadful.
Ok well I think you're very naive.
Bollss · 15/12/2020 10:35

@DameFanny

If you've read it, you'll know the advice is for a younger child to be isolated with a parent, for an older child to stay apart, for bathrooms etc to be cleaned after use. No?
Staying apart doesn't have to mean shut in one room.
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