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Original poster

Making isolating 13 yr old not leave her room for 10 days!!

565 replies

novaparty12 · 14/12/2020 18:43

My niece is 13 and on Friday she was told to isolate by her school as the girl she sits next to tested positive. She lives in London where transmission is really high. I spoke to MIL today who said that my SIL has told her she is not allowed out of her room apart from going to the toilet or having a shower. All meals are left outside her door for her to collect and my SIL went shopping and spend £50 on snacks and drinks so she doesn't have to leave her room. MIL is really worried about her she keeps phoning her in tears. My SIL is autistic and takes everything very very seriously but surely confining a 13 yr old to her room for 10 days is going a bit far isn't it??

OP posts:
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6
Bollss · 14/12/2020 18:55

@Bluegreen70

This is completely normal. Children all over the UK are in this situation. Any child sent home to self isolate who has siblings, or vulnerable family members. We expect any children we send home to be confined to their rooms. Toilet use excepted, but the toilet will need to be cleaned very thoroughly after they have used it. If there are two toilets in the house, then one for the isolator, and one for everyone else in the family.

At 13, she just has to suck it up.Primary school children are coping

No, this is not normal. Why do you expect this??
canigooutyet · 14/12/2020 18:56

If the mum or another household member has underlying conditions, other than op mentioned perhaps there extra precaution taken.

Bluegreen70 · 14/12/2020 18:57

@Diverseduvet

This is unacceptable, please intervene.
well, you are going to need to intervene for countless thousands of other children as well then.

We are in a pandemic FFS.

Stop namby pambying young people who are perfectly capable of understanding the situation and coping with it.

Its hardly like she has been locked in the cellar.

MissBPotter · 14/12/2020 18:57

That’s really not right. My dd just lived normally at home, in garden etc. Unless someone in the house is very vulnerable I see this as abusive.

SomewhereEast · 14/12/2020 18:57

@Bluegreen70

This is completely normal. Children all over the UK are in this situation. Any child sent home to self isolate who has siblings, or vulnerable family members. We expect any children we send home to be confined to their rooms. Toilet use excepted, but the toilet will need to be cleaned very thoroughly after they have used it. If there are two toilets in the house, then one for the isolator, and one for everyone else in the family.

At 13, she just has to suck it up.Primary school children are coping

Lol if you actually think many parents are doing that to their primary school aged kids
megletthesecond · 14/12/2020 18:57

It's bananas.
If they have a garden she needs to get out there as much as she can. Lots of open windows and masks in the house might just see them through.

formerbabe · 14/12/2020 18:58

@Bluegreen70

This is completely normal. Children all over the UK are in this situation. Any child sent home to self isolate who has siblings, or vulnerable family members. We expect any children we send home to be confined to their rooms. Toilet use excepted, but the toilet will need to be cleaned very thoroughly after they have used it. If there are two toilets in the house, then one for the isolator, and one for everyone else in the family.

At 13, she just has to suck it up.Primary school children are coping

I wouldn't do that even if my dc tested positive. I'd allow isolate them in the house obviously but not their room.

Wow, they've done a job on us haven't they? Putting our own dc in solitary confinement for a disease which vast majority of us will recover from. Disgusting

megletthesecond · 14/12/2020 18:58

2 weeks without vitamin D, white daylight and fresh air is wrong.

WhoseThatGirl · 14/12/2020 18:59

We didn’t distance from our 9 yr old DD when she was positive. DD is an anxious child and we didn’t want to make her feel worried. I could understand if someone in the household is vulnerable but if not I think it’s way over the top and cruel.

MassiveSalad · 14/12/2020 19:00

Absolute madness. I can't believe what people are prepared to do. We will look back on this time in 10 years and think just what the fuck did we do.

Foobydoo · 14/12/2020 19:01

DH had symptoms and we live in a one bathroom house. We decided he would isolate in dd2s room and she would sleep with me, with DH just coming out to use the bathroom.
After a few hours we realised how hard this was and decided DH would just be scrupulous with hygiene, keep his distance and sleep in dds room. Luckily his test was negative.
If an adult struggles to isolate it will be very hard for a child.

Bluegreen70 · 14/12/2020 19:02

Lol if you actually think many parents are doing that to their primary school aged kids

I KNOW it is happening to many primary school kids. If it is necessary, then it is necessary. It depends on the medical staus of the rest of the household.

This thread is the only place I have seen any pearl clutching or winging about this.

Not one single child I know has complained. They understand, and parents make it as good an experience as possible.

Children can and are coping by the thousand.

MissBPotter · 14/12/2020 19:02

At 13, she just has to suck it up.Primary school children are coping

No one I know of is doing this to a child who has to self isolate. It would be an extreme over reaction imo (unless someone in the household is extremely vulnerable and even then, I don’t see how this is possible, or acceptable, for younger primary aged children).

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 14/12/2020 19:02

@ssd

Unfortunately it's what she has to do but it feels cruel to do that to a 13 year old Mental health is just as important
It is not what she has to do. Fair enough if the girl was symptomatic but she isn't.
Bollss · 14/12/2020 19:03

@Bluegreen70

Lol if you actually think many parents are doing that to their primary school aged kids

I KNOW it is happening to many primary school kids. If it is necessary, then it is necessary. It depends on the medical staus of the rest of the household.

This thread is the only place I have seen any pearl clutching or winging about this.

Not one single child I know has complained. They understand, and parents make it as good an experience as possible.

Children can and are coping by the thousand.

How do you personally know all these thousands of poor children?
Meredithgrey1 · 14/12/2020 19:03

At 13, she just has to suck it up.Primary school children are coping

Out of interest, what is (in your opinion) the youngest age that this is acceptable for? I don’t believe many people are doing this to primary school children at all.

TimeForLunch · 14/12/2020 19:03

That is definitely going too far and so sad that your SIL feels she must do this. Is she particularly vulnerable to covid? I wouldn't even confine my teenager to her room if she tested positive (although she does a good job of it herself generally).

lalaland1999 · 14/12/2020 19:03

I don't know anyone who's forced their child to self isolate alone in their room and that includes older teenagers. Certainly not the norm around here (London).

Bluegreen70 · 14/12/2020 19:04

@megletthesecond

2 weeks without vitamin D, white daylight and fresh air is wrong.
Give the kid vitamin D then, what is the problem?

This is a pandemic.

cases are sky rocketing

hundreds are dying.

Get real.

Kids are not made of spun glass.

Its not abusive any more than performing an operation on a child is abusive. It isn't pleasant, but it is a medical necessity

RaggieDolls · 14/12/2020 19:04

In the two periods of isolation my primary aged child has had this term it didn't occur to any parent in the class to confine their child to their room.

Aside from the obvious cruelty of the idea we had to homeschool which involved sitting next to them teaching and helping.

Bluegreen70 · 14/12/2020 19:05

@lalaland1999

I don't know anyone who's forced their child to self isolate alone in their room and that includes older teenagers. Certainly not the norm around here (London).
I teach in London, and it certainly is the norm.
Bollss · 14/12/2020 19:05

but it is a medical necessity

Oh, bollocks is it. Disgusting that you're defending this.

EndoplasmicReticulum · 14/12/2020 19:05

I did that with my son. He's 15 and was happy enough as he has computer in his room. Multigenerational household with resident oldies.

canigooutyet · 14/12/2020 19:07

Oh so now because a teen is confined to their room for 2 weeks them not getting sun is an issue.

What about those who have been stuck inside since March, including children who will be doing just this. Isolating?

You might be able to sit in the same room as your children when they are ill or vice versa. Not everyone can unless they want to end up seriously ill.

Napqueen1234 · 14/12/2020 19:08

@Bluegreen70 I think you’re seriously overestimating how intensely parents are forcing their children to isolate. There’s no way you could leave a primary age child in their room alone for 2 weeks that’s crazy. Children need love and support especially in a stressful time. What have we become locking kids away?! It’s their home! If I had a vulnerable family member I would keep them apart but my DDs when isolating have lived normally within the home. This behaviour will exacerbate the hugely negative impact of covid for children.