"This isn't a proper lockdown, honestly what about your life has changed?"

[BecomeStronger]

Said by a colleague this week.

It's true we're working as normal (school) but nothing else is normal about my life. The things sadly lacking and sorely missed for me are:

My parents
My sister
Any gathering with more than one friend and being able to meet anyone in comfort indoors.
My best friend I have to travel to see.
My running club
The gym
Pubs and restaurants (I don't go that often but am missing the opportunity iyswim)
Not being able to plan anything confident that it will actually happen.
Driving lessons
A day out in London using public transport

These are the routine things I'm missing, let alone the one off big occasions like a party, a holiday, a show or a concert.

I'm not complaining as such, I get it, but I am finding it hard, especially now the dark evenings mean a run after work on my own isn't as pleasant as it was in summer.

What kind of life does someone live to have really not noticed any difference, or are people generally just ignoring it all?

@WankPuffins

housebound and/or socially isolated

Wow, and there I was just happy growing veg and potting in my garden for pleasure and just being happy in the company of my immediate family instead of being a social butterfly. House bound or socially isolated do give over.

If you very rarely go out to any of the places that are currently closed or see anyone outside your immediate household, and are therefore completely unaffected by the current lockdown, then i'd say you are by definition socially isolated. As in, you conduct your life largely in isolation from wider society. It's not a value judgement, just a description.

[quote notheragain41]@psychomath I'm not one of these challenging people of what they're missing, but for me, despite loving going to restaurants, cinema etc this lockdown is different because it wasn't a shock like the first and has a finite end date, ok I know there's a chance it could be extended, but I'm just seeing it as 4 weeks so whilst there's some bits I'm missing, it doesn't feel like last time when you never knew if (close to) reality would return again, and as it has returned again previously I don't feel so fearful. Plus we have the light at the end of the tunnel with the vaccine.

For me that's why this lockdown isn't comparable and I'm not missing things as much as the first, I know I will do them again soon, not because I don't do them.[/quote]
No I totally get that, and I feel the same about this lockdown compared to the first one. There's much less of an apocalyptic feeling to it and now that I'm back in work I've had several days that were all but indistinguishable from my normal life. But some people - not you! - adopt this disingenuous "but I just don't understaaand, how can your life be that different?" attitude, and it's either spectacularly thick or a way to get a snide little dig in at people who actually like to go out and see their friends sometimes. It just rubs me the wrong way.

Well, I miss going to the shops without a stupid face mask. I miss being able to shop without being shouted at by an aggressive door person because I’ve entered the shop through the wrong bit of door (looking at T K Maxx here). I’ve lost three holidays this year although I’ve not lost my job or my home. I miss all the fun, spontaneity and social things in life. Everyone looks so weary and miserable when you go out and I loathe Zoom or FaceTime calls to my family who live locally. We all normally get together very regularly in person. As far as I’m concerned Christmas is already ruined as it’s not just a few days around 25 December it’s all the fun, the lights, Christmas markets and the atmosphere in the run up to the day. Did I say that I loathe and detest shopping in a face mask, but hey I’m keeping others safe.

I'm still working (teacher) and studying another MSc part time. Still have the countryside on my doorstep for walking and running. The animals need to be looked after as normal and I now also have a dog to walk for a friend with a broken leg. Volunteering roles most weekends (U18s pretty much free to travel in Scotland for sport plus anyone from us + neighbouring tier 2 areas). No theatre but still plenty of good books I haven't read and music to listen to. Keeping in touch with friends and family online, much as usual as they're all so spread out. I have a busy and fulfilling life, but perhaps not one that is particularly reliant on other people.

While my life is vastly different to this time last year, the change is less noticeable because we’ve had restrictions for so long. My city was in Tier 2 then Tier 3 before this lockdown, so there was never a sudden closure of everything like with the first lockdown.

In the first lockdown, things we’d had planned for months kept getting cancelled. A trip to see family abroad at Easter, theatre tickets for DP’s birthday, even just preplanned coffee with friends. Every time something else got cancelled, I felt disappointed. This time, I hadn’t got anything booked in, so I don’t have an inbox full of cancellation emails to remind me of what I’m missing.

@psychomath yes I completely agree, I understand it's more difficult for many with it being winter too, I'm struggling to motivate myself to get out more when I need to!

At the moment

• can't see my partner
• working from home
• haven't seen any friends in months
• haven't seen any family in months

Basically my day to day life at the mo is just school runs / nursery runs, working at home. No social life.

I do feel so sorry for those saying its not bad, or its like normal, it feels like all they had in their lives before was work, housework and the supermarket shop.

Do you mean not seeing a difference between lockdown and the Tier restrictions , or the difference between lockdown and normal life?

Because just looking at new tier 3 restrictions there isn't that much improvement from lockdown tbh

For me it’s awful! I gave birth to my first last week and would really appreciate both my mum and MIL being able to pop over and help. We had an issue with feeding when he was born and the midwives kept telling me it was normal but I could just feel something wasn’t right. However, I listened to them and ended up at the point where baby lost more weight than he should! If mum or MIL had been able to visit, they would have given me ten confidence to speak up more they would also have been able to help as for the first four days I was getting less than 1 hour sleep per 24 hours. It was very difficult and would have so much easier with others around.

Don’t feel sorry for me, I love my life, I go to the stables twice a day to take care of my horse, walk my dogs twice a day, I go to work everyday as I can’t do my job from home, my daughter’s at school, son and husband both going to work, see my mum and Dad every day from the end of the drive, my life is busy and enjoyable, I do miss going out to dinner and the theatre, I have made restaurant bookings for as soon as lockdown is lifted but it’s not been the end of the world. We went out once a week for dinner in the summer so not going for 4 weeks is doable.

@MargosKaftan I do feel so sorry for those saying its not bad, or its like normal, it feels like all they had in their lives before was work, housework and the supermarket shop.

It’s not that bad this time as doesn’t involve wfh while homeschooling! Had a nice week away in the summer & that’s looking possible for next year too. Kids can still see their friends during school, I can still meet a friend for a walk. Only when that stops does the glass become half empty...

.

My mum is in my childcare bubble, my sister lives with her. I'm lucky enough to see them when they watch my Ds for me (I'm a student nurse)

I still have a part time job, DH works full time as a key worker.

DH family live very local, everyone's still working so we don't see much of each other anyway.

Honestly for us, with the exception of no Christmas markets or shopping or meals out - nothing has changed.

@MrsR87 congratulations on your baby. Do you have a partner? If so tag team for sleep (unfortunately family around or not newborns are sleep thieves!) Think part of the announcement yesterday was that with a baby under 1 you will be able to bubble with someone (shame for rest of family in this precious early days though).

I'm an introvert so with a very quiet social life, so some might say my life hasn't changed much. But I do like being around people, brief chats at the local shop waving to a neighbour, sitting in a cafe or a cinema. That's not happening right now and quiet introverts aren't great at Zoom get togethers

@MargosKaftan

I do feel so sorry for those saying its not bad, or its like normal, it feels like all they had in their lives before was work, housework and the supermarket shop.

I could easily turn that around , but I won't because I'm not a dick.

No need to feel sorry for people that are not complaining.

@PotholePalace

I'm an introvert so with a very quiet social life, so some might say my life hasn't changed much. But I do like being around people, brief chats at the local shop waving to a neighbour, sitting in a cafe or a cinema. That's not happening right now and quiet introverts aren't great at Zoom get togethers

Same, it's pretty shit.