Page 5 | Are you allowing teenage DC into friends houses?

Serendipity09 · 2020-11-14T11:28:08+00:00

I'm not. A walk outside, yes. DD's friend and her parents aren't happy that we won't let DD go round for the afternoon. DD understands, and doesn't want to anyway. They're not at same school so aren't 'mixing anyway'. I shouldn't be feeling bad about this, right?

LynetteScavo · 14/11/2020 17:10

@AlexaShutUp

I'm really surprised at how many parents are ignoring the rules with regard to their teens. My 15yo dd understands the rules and hasn't asked to break them. As far as I know, her friends are complying with them too.

She isn't worried about getting the virus herself, but she doesn't want to pass it on to someone else who might be vulnerable.

Mine too.

On the other hand my older teen is not currently at home. I don't think he's on a bike ride in the dark and rain. If I won't let his friends into the house, I have to accept he might disappear off to a friends. His argument will be he's sat next to them at college all week. He'll then add that he's never taken drugs so I should think myself lucky.

Hoppinggreen · 14/11/2020 17:15

So if the 2 teens (who are in a bubble at school) don’t use public transport and only mix with their parents and all said parents wfh and don’t mix with anyone, else spend time together how is this putting anyone at risk?

mamaduckbone · 14/11/2020 17:26

No we're not. I had a massive row with ds14 about it today as he'd arranged to go to someone's house who isn't at his school and we said no. He seems to have calmed down now. I get the reasons why he thinks it's stupid but he doesn't have any excuse not to just knuckle down and get on with it like the rest of us.
Apparently we're the only parents out of his friendship group who are insisting that the rules are followed, which pisses me off no end because we're now the bad guys. As usual.

Hoppinggreen · 14/11/2020 17:36

Our 2 teens in question are studying together in the dining room
Loads of their year group (11) are posting about meet ups and parties

GetOffYourHighHorse · 14/11/2020 17:39

'DD (14). sits on the wall at the front of her friend's house and chats with her mate who stands in the doorway about 1.5m away. Being a teen right now is utter shit.'

It really isn't. They see their pals all day at school. If people were honest they would admit many teens are addicted to social media anyway and often choose group chats over going out particularly in winter.

It is why this shit situation is like it is, people just cannot seem to follow simple instructions. Ours are meeting one friend out for a bikeride or similar

AlexaShutUp · 14/11/2020 17:44

Actually, I think things are pretty shit for teens at the moment. They are missing out on so much, and then some of them have all of the uncertainty over whether their exams are happening or not. Contrary to what you might think, they don't all live their lives on social media.

Shit as it is, though, my dd knows that she just has to suck it up. We're in the middle of a pandemic, and it's shit for lots of people right now. That isn't a reason for people to ignore the rules and do whatever they like!

Newpuppymummy · 14/11/2020 17:47

I’m the same as you. I will let them meet with one friend outside only

Changethetoner · 14/11/2020 17:49

No way. Because we are at level1 tier in Scotland, and it is now allowed. She went on a bike ride with a friend today, but is now allowed to meet up indoors. None of us are.

GetOffYourHighHorse · 14/11/2020 17:49

'Actually, I think things are pretty shit for teens at the moment. '

No one is loving this situation. Teens are no more pissed off than the rest of the population. To allow sleepovers and parties because they can't cope is ridiculous. If a dc has significant mh problems that of course is very sad and worrying for the parent and they need to allow some social contact, but again outside one to one.

AlexaShutUp · 14/11/2020 17:51

No one is loving this situation. Teens are no more pissed off than the rest of the population. To allow sleepovers and parties because they can't cope is ridiculous. If a dc has significant mh problems that of course is very sad and worrying for the parent and they need to allow some social contact, but again outside one to one.

Did you read the second half of my post, GetOffYourHighHorse

Armi · 14/11/2020 17:51

For those who are saying, ‘Well, they are together in their bubble at school’ I assume you realise that they aren’t in a bubble of two? They will be mixing with, possibly, several hundred other teenagers, many of whom will be merrily mixing with others. Bubbles are not ‘safe’. You might not go anywhere. The other kid’s parents might not go anywhere...but parents of kids in that bubble might be cheerfully filling their houses with their mates, allowing sleepovers, breaking rules all over the place because they are too special or fucking stupid to follow them. Don’t tell yourself it’s ok because your child is in a ‘bubble’. It really isn’t.

Xenia · 14/11/2020 18:11

No and my son's friends and he respect that and made the same choice - i.e. to follow the law. That is even though I have been against all mandatory CV19 legislation since March.

grenadines · 14/11/2020 18:19

No none of our family are meeting up with anyone at the moment, apart from the odd friend for a walk.

It is clear that covid spreads in indoor social situations (particularly when windows aren't open) so even if we weren't in lockdown I would not be having friends round to the house.

justicedanceson · 14/11/2020 18:26

[quote MadinMarch]@Vargas
Mrsbrunch, why is it a problem for a couple who go to school together, and sit on a train together, and presumably are in very close contact, to see each other in each other's houses outside of school? Genuine question.

Just a guess, but maybe there's a significant risk of spreading a particularly contagious virus that's doing the rounds at the moment?

One infected person going into their classmates home, risks spreading it to the rest of that household- to the parents and any other children in the family, who then take it into their workplaces, schools and supermarkets etc etc etc

It's really not difficult to grasp that it increases the exponential risk[/quote]
If one gets COVID and they don’t see each other indoors on a Saturday then all it changes is that they will catch it on Monday.
People who thinks schools have some magic force field are engaging in some wishful thinking.

MrsBrunch · 14/11/2020 18:37

'People who thinks schools have some magic force field are engaging in some wishful thinking.'

No, schools are high risk. Everyone knows that. They are only allowing it because children need an education.

They don't need to be socialising outside of school over the next 3 weeks. Why do so many people find that hard to understand.

Also, the friend might not pass it to the child they sit next to but they may pass it to the family members of that child when they visit them at home.

It's really, really not that hard is understand is it?

LilyPond2 · 14/11/2020 18:49

Haven't RTFT, but no, 17-year-old DD wouldn't ask to meet with a friend indoors as she believes in keeping to the rules herself.

PhilCornwall1 · 14/11/2020 18:49

They don't need to be socialising outside of school over the next 3 weeks. Why do so many people find that hard to understand.

So if this is all over on the 2nd December and they can all meet up again, what's changed? Bugger all I'd suggest.

Hoppinggreen · 14/11/2020 19:00

So on December 1st 1 teenager who spends all day with DD at school is a risk if he visits our house and on December 2nd he’s not?

RayOfSunshine2013 · 14/11/2020 19:06

I don’t have a teenager, but my 7 year old plays with his friend a few houses down, either at ours or theirs. I’m not getting him involved in the drama, he mixes with his class all day at school so what’s one extra kid

Dadnotamum72 · 14/11/2020 19:17

@Hoppinggreen

So on December 1st 1 teenager who spends all day with DD at school is a risk if he visits our house and on December 2nd he’s not?

It's the same old arguement as someone sitting on a park bench in April, low risk but at the time not allowed, if everyone who thinks something is low risk ignores the rules where do you draw the line and you end up with no lockdown at all.

Also lockdown ends on the 2nd ( including) so they cant come round officially until the 3rd.

MrsBrunch · 14/11/2020 19:21

@PhilCornwall1

They don't need to be socialising outside of school over the next 3 weeks. Why do so many people find that hard to understand.

So if this is all over on the 2nd December and they can all meet up again, what's changed? Bugger all I'd suggest.

No one knows yet, maybe lockdown will continue, but we do know that until 2 December households should not be mixing.

MrsBrunch · 14/11/2020 19:22

@RayOfSunshine2013

I don’t have a teenager, but my 7 year old plays with his friend a few houses down, either at ours or theirs. I’m not getting him involved in the drama, he mixes with his class all day at school so what’s one extra kid

Here's another prime example. Doh.

theThreeofWeevils · 14/11/2020 19:29

Her welfare is more important than anyone else's right now

Why? Perhaps you mean Her welfare is more important TO ME than anyone else's right now and therefore the restrictions do not apply

pasanda · 14/11/2020 19:51

Well yes clearly.

NotAKaren · 14/11/2020 20:04

My DD has missed 4 weeks of school due isolating because to cases in her bubble. First was a student who had returned from holiday abroad in September and didn't want to miss out by having to isolate and second was a student who caught it at friends sleepover party. So that's 4 weeks out of 6 of lots of student missing education, disruption and extra work for teachers and schools just because others are selfish cannot see what the problem is. What the hell is wrong with people 🙄