How are people so calm about Covid?

[BumbleWumble]

I have written several posts now and been told my reaction is not normal and that I need help for my mental health as I am suffering from health anxiety.

But how do you come to terms with coexisting with this disease, possibly forever if no vaccine is found? A highly contagious disease that you run the risk of catching everywhere you go and might kill you. Even if it doesn't you might be left with severe incapacitating organ damage. Or you might get the long haul version that goes on for months at least. Since the disease is so new no one actually knows if people with this form actually ever get better.

This doesn't seem an equivalent risk to say driving a car. It seems that eventually most people will contract it. True, many people would have a mild version then recover, although even the mild version is supposed to be a nasty experience. But a vast number of people would either die, be left with terrible lasting damage or be ill for months, possibly permanently. Also it's not known whether lasting immunity is conferred, so you might initially get a mild version then get a more severe version at a later date. And as well as this, there is the constant fear of loved ones getting it and that you might pass it on to them. Or that you might unknowingly infect any one.

In addition to this, our quality of life will be awful. As well as the threat of the actual virus constantly hanging over us, social distancing will remain necessary and we will never be able to freely interact with other people ever again. People will not be able to be close with family and friends. There will be no proper socialising, no events where people gather. There will be fear every time an indoor space has to be shared with others. Indoor workplaces especially will be a major risk forever more. As will public transport.

We will just lead a terribly bleak existence knowing that at some point we will likely catch the disease regardless with a relatively high chance of a terrible outcome. Or if not us then a loved one.

I don't understand how people aren't more concerned about this and put it on a par with other daily risks such as driving a car. It is so terrible the whole world has come to a halt over it, and if no vaccine is found quickly, is going to have a catastrophic impact on humanity as a whole as far as I can see.

I realise there will be no choice but to get on with life, but I do not know how to do this without an ever present sense of anxiety and dread. I can think of little else and if this is to be the future then I fear the rest of my life consisting of terrible fear waiting for it to get me and loved ones.

I feel utter despair and terror. It's like a nightmare with no end.

@prettygreenteacup

OP your response is not normal. It's a symptom of the scaremongering that the government and media had to do in order for everyone to comply with lockdown.

People seem to forget that lockdown was to help flatten the curve so as not to overwhelm the NHS. Which is what happened. It worked, which is great. We did not lock down because this virus is hiding around every corner and everyone will die from it, so we must all stay home forever. Our social responsibility now is to help mitigate the spreading of it, with social distancing for a while longer and masks etc. If I wear a mask in a shop it's not because I am afraid of Covid, it's because I have a responsibility as a citizen to help reduce any potential spreading of it to someone who may be vulnerable.

But if there had to be a lockdown, it must be because the virus is genuinely very scary. If there was a danger of the NHS becoming overwhelmed it's because the disease is caoa8of killing a vast number of people. It already did kill ober 60 thousands in the space of a couple of months.

OP you have health anxiety which has not been helped by scare mongering in the media and the fact it's all that was being talked about for a while. thankfully, that's eased up somewhat and noone I know is talking about it anymore and the news doesnt seem to be only filled with it. contact your GP for the anxiety though. this must be so consuming and overwhelming for you

OP I can understand that it’s the anxiety making you think like that but I really think you need to see your GP about it.

Last time I saw the figures it was like 1 in 4000 people had the chance of catching coronavirus and unless you have underlying health conditions or are old, your chance of dying is phenomenally low (and yes I am fully aware younger people have died).

My husband works in aviation and I find the prospect of him losing his job far scarier than coronavirus. The future state of the economy after lockdown and children losing out on their education is far scarier than coronavirus. We locked down to protect the NHS and vulnerable people and not because it’s a rampaging virus that’s going to kill everyone in sight.

Just go out using the precautions recommended (hand washing, mask etc) and you will be fine

Creating thread after thread to run simultaneously like this will serve what purpose for you?

Or is their purpose to simply stir up other anxious people?

Just a thought.

Oh, did you actually develop TB then OP?

I suggest you look up data on other pandemics in the past if you are very anxious. That helped me in the beginning. There have been far more deadly ones, and yes a lot of people have died in a short space of time, but other illnesses have proven to be far more deadly if you get it.

I think the reason other people aren't worried is a) so many people are telling me they think they had it already b) they know of other people who have worked through the pandemic around a lot of other people and nobody has contracted it, despite being told they are at high risk of catching it. If this helps, I have two family members who work in large supermarkets and nobody in either store has had it knowingly. it was running rampant before, but we still have the biggest risk factors restricted right now. Obviously the risk is different for health workers. C) people are more worried about other things - finances, their children's well-being and education, the state of their town and what will remain open, their own mental health with juggling work and homeschooling. For me, these worries totally eclipse covid now, I am burnt out and struggling immensely.

People are getting angry about a lot of the government's decisions now. They can justify planes flying into the country with people from all over the country/world, but refuse to give our kids an education or let us walk around a supermarket and we have to bloody queue. The fact that the governments response is farcical doesn't really help with people who either have health anxiety or people who think the threat is small. I am not filled with confidence about their ability or with what their agenda is. That really scares me.

Or is their purpose to simply stir up other anxious people?

I hadn’t thought of this. Misery loves company - plus also this is a sort of think that’s well known on online forums where people like riling others up and winding up other anxious people....

Either way - for OP’s benefit and for others these many threads on the same paralysing anxiety - is of no use at all

@duckme
I agree with so much of what you say.
I’ve never watched any news for years now .
It’s all scare mongering anyway. It’s amazing what you need to know filters in to you.
@BumbleWumble

Just keep away from all media and live your life.
I was feeling a bit down yesterday, tired and a bit unhappy at the thought of how we are expected to live in the future and also had an appointment at the dentist. I’ve broken two teeth in lockdown and had an awful infection and a kidney infection that I’ve managed to sort out myself.
This is far more real and debilitating than something ‘out there’ that I may not get.
After the dentist, who’s done a temporary repair, I went into town and it was almost normal. In fact , if it wasn’t so sad it would be laughable at the amount of dancing around one another that goes on.
90 per cent of the population aren’t wearing masks or shields which is good as long as we aren’t coughing and spluttering over one another. That is a good thing.

The saying, you need to get out more has never been so apt.
It’s true. Dip your toe into reality.
I came back feeling refreshed. I popped into my dd’s house . Everything normal there. Town almost normal. Did some gardening when I came back. Normal.
Had dinner with husband in the evening.
Normal
I ended the day on a much better note than it began.

I’ve had some awful times in my life. Lost loved ones . Nasty illnesses.
I had measles, mumps, chicken pox, rubella, whooping cough as a child. Survived them all and they left no nasty after effects. I had pneumonia when my children were babies and I honestly thought I was going to leave them orphaned when I was carted off to hospital but it took a long time, almost 6 months but I recovered.

Now, my health care is my priority.
I really look after myself with sunshine, supplements, good diet etc

We were evacuated back from Tenerife in mid March. No social distancing, no masks, no sanitiser. Over 3000 people rammed in the airport, 300 on the plane. We didn’t get it and neither did our friends who were evacuated in same conditions, different days.

We have lived our lives as normal throughout this. Seen family regularly. Gone out most days. In fact driving on the quiet roads was lovely..now not so as they are back to normal.

Please, take precautions, be sensible...but get out and stop worrying.

Got to mitigate the risks. You’re more likely to die crossing the road.

Reading your posts you’ve clearly got some underling anxiety.

I am sorry you feel bad about it. Why do you say there is a high chance of a terrible outcome? That is totally wrong. The highest chance unless you are obese or old or sick is that there will be hardly any adverse effects at all if you get it - you might get it badly but probably not.

I suppose I don't worry too much about things. I also read a lot of books when younger from ages when people were constantly in fear of disease eg tuberculosis known as the white man's plague which was a huge curse over the UK at one time and then I remember people limping who used to have polio before the injection came out etc So I suppose disease has always been part of my emotional back drop even from nursery rhymes - Ring o' roses - probably about the great plague. The bible is full of this stuff too so anyone who grew up going to church will know all about plagues etc. So that gives people a backdrop and almost an expectation that dire diseases can come at any time so it was no surprise to some of us.

Humans aren't designed to live how you are. If we really absorbed all the terrible things in the world, anxiety and depression would be universal. So we have an.inbuilt mechanism to ignore or minimise. I don't know why yours is broken on covid but not on other things (there are far worse ways to die that are killing other people daily) but it is and I suggest you speak to your GP.

It already did kill ober 60 thousands in the space of a couple of months

There's a difference between 60 thousand people who tested positive for coronavirus dying, and 60 thousand people dying of only coronavirus. Some people did die of coronavirus, however some of the 60 thousand had coronavirus listed as one of the causes of death. Some of these 60 thousand would have died anyway.

(Please don't think I'm minimising their deaths or the impact of someone dying on a family. I'm just trying to give OP some perspective.)

I also have death as a backdrop...it can happen at any time and I sit firmly at the other end of the spectrum to the OP that I don’t understand what all the fuss is about! This is life, viruses happen, they always have!

But this is no Spanish flu, no Black Death, no TB....it’s actually pretty low grade!

I get more angry about the (at the last count) 14,000 lockdown deaths....people not seeking / having treatment, suicides etc. That is entirely unnecessary, a virus is uncontrollable.

@PhilCornwall1

Creating thread after thread to run simultaneously like this will serve what purpose for you?

Or is their purpose to simply stir up other anxious people?

Just a thought.

I don't mean to stir up other people's anxiety. I am just so anxious it becomes unbearable in my own head. I suppose I hope some one will say something to put me at greater ease.

I have just been messaging with some one I know in America and he has said my reaction is perfectly normal though. That the appropriate reaction is terror ands a sense nothing will be normal again. And that any one who doesn't feel that is the problem as they are more liable to act irresponsibly.

That is not what I really want to hear. That I am actually correct to feel a sense of doom. But maybe I am simply being realistic, sadly.

Op - do you even hear what people are saying?

Or do you think it’s just plain wrong and everyone has got it wrong and this is the biggest threat to humanity there has ever been and people are just not seeing it as it really is?

OP my dad is 93. He is still more likely to survive than die if he gets Covid.
My DH is obese, 62 and diabetic. He is way more likely to survive than end up in hospital, let alone die. He was panicking at the start because he thought he would definitely die until I showed him the stats. So now we avoid crowds, wash hands and use sanitiser. He goes out to work indoors with the public every day.

I have just been messaging with some one I know in America and he has said my reaction is perfectly normal though. That the appropriate reaction is terror ands a sense nothing will be normal again. And that any one who doesn't feel that is the problem as they are more liable to act irresponsibly.

Of course you will find others that will affirm your anxiety on the internet.

If you really want to know if your anxiety is a reasonable response why don't you have a chat with your GP?

I think the statistic is that 50% of us will get cancer. Some, but clearly not all, of that 50% will die. But we just get on with life. We overeat, we drink too much. We do things that increase our risks. But we do so because we want to, because we don't want to think that it will be us, because life is for living.

You are FAR more likely to die in a car crash than of CV.

I really think a sense of perspective is required. Read the medical articles on this. Not the sensationalist press.

Most of don't know a single person who has had CV. Not a single person.

You want people to tell you your reactions are normal. They aren't. You're anxiety is exasperating them.

You need to see your GP and review/change any meds you may be on or see a counsellor.

Op I imagine you believe that you can see the danger, the risk and possibility of death and you are incredulous that other people can not see what is blindly before them?

A very contagious killer virus.

In order to really assess your own personal risk you only need to look at the stats to know you are indeed a very low risk.

You are under 50, female and have no serious underlying health problems. Your chances of catching it are very small, and your chances of dying smaller still.

But actually from now on to all intents and purposes life must be lived wrapped in cotton wool, separated from others, never able to freely interact with other people again

I am more or less the same age as you, I am certainly not living in cotton wool and I am spending my time with friends and having fun! I am going on holiday today, I have restaurants booked and many things planned. Why am I so relaxed? Well because I feel safe, I don't feel I am going to be struck down at any moment. I take precautions, I wear gloves when out shopping etc, I socialise outside where I know the chances of catching it are extremely low, I take the measures I can to keep everyone safe, and get on with enjoying life. I could be hit by a truck tomorrow, so I need to make the most of today. My children's lives are fast evaporating. I don't want to waste their childhood being locked away when I know they are at no risk whatsoever.

I would seriously consider getting help for your anxiety, reading the facts about the virus so you know your risks are low. You can make them lower still be staying healthy and active, and not allowing your body to be submerged with stress - which will lower your immune system.

You owe it to yourself to get help op.

The fact you’ve found someone to back up your anxious thoughts isn’t a surprise to me.

I have very very low levels of anxiety and I can’t stand being around irrational people. So I don’t. As demonstrated on how you respond to your threads....it’s pointless trying to rationalise with highly anxious people so most rational people just give up. And stay away.

Yet people with anxiety quite like other people with anxiety.....your American friend is one of them.

I just can't worry about something that I may or may not catch, and probably wouldn't die of. People worry about all kinds things, my DM won't drive further than 2 miles from her house because she is frightened of driving, yet my DH drives hundreds of miles each day when he is on the road with his job, everyone is different.

My understanding is that the majority of people will be symptomatic or mild. The minority get very sick.
I take precautions (I work in a school) and go about life otherwise I’ll go mad.

I feel utter despair and terror. It's like a nightmare with no end.

Firstly, I am sorry you feel this way.

This is disaster thinking and it is understandable but not helpful and it is painful to have this level of worry.

We are definitely in a difficult place, the virus is real, the response has been poor and there is much to worry about.

BUT I don't think we are doomed.

You sound to me like you could use counselling and some time to think about how you are feeling.

*asymptotic not symptomatic.