Anyone else fed up of negativity?

[TJ17]

Sorry but this is a long one. Just something I need to get out and don't blame anyone for not reading it all 😅

Basically I'm getting to the point now where it's really bringing me down! 🤦🏼‍♀️
I get the seriousness of the situation don't get me wrong and I understand the devastation COVID has caused for families but I'm just at the point where I'm tired of hearing all the hysteria about second waves and how the government has dealt with it all wrong, easing lockdown is a mistake and we are all screwed etc.

At first I was terrified of the virus as I'm sure area lot of others. My DH has had to go to work throughout the entire time so we have never had a chance to shield at home. Me and my 2.5 year old DS never left the house other than for short walks (I'm also currently 31 weeks pregnant) but there was still always the risk DH could bring something home.
So I stopped watching news, deleted social media etc as I was doing all I could myself and didn't want to hear anything else about it as I was terrified.

Then at my 20 week scan I found out my DD had a medical condition and my world fell apart. She's due in August and not only do I have the worry of the medical treatment and surgery she will need when she's here, I also have the worry about COVID affecting the birth in not having DH there for the induction (current guidelines are active labour only for birthing partners) and then him having to leave straight after birth leaving me alone to deal with the new baby's treatment by myself.
My DS is 2.5 and I've never left him overnight before (just never needed to) and not left him during the day for more than a few hours either as I'm a SAHM and don't have much family support. My mum is the only one who has ever looked after him but she spends half her year in her holiday home in another country where she is currently stuck due to having her flight home cancelled in March. I was relying on her to have DS whilst I give birth but although she has a flight home booked in time for the birth, we don't know if that will go ahead. I'm wracked with anxiety over what will happen with DS if she doesn't get back as it's bad enough having to leave him for the first time in these circumstances let alone if I end up having to leave him with someone he's not that comfortable with (not that any of DH family has offered to have him if mum is not home anyway)

So basically what I'm trying to say is, I have a lot to worry about right now and hearing so much negativity is dragging me down to the point I feel like just sitting here crying right now over the uncertainty of it all.
My mum seems to be the worst, every time we speak she talks about what a mess our country is in (the one she is in have irradiated the virus at the moment, 0 cases for a while now and back to almost normal life) and she repeats things she's heard from friends or the media about everything going wrong, she constantly reminds me her flight could be cancelled (the country she is currently in not accepting flights from UK yet) and it's really not helpful to me.
She is also classed as high risk with the virus so I'm not keen on her coming home anyway in that respect and everyone keeps telling her that she's safer out there and she should stay but she tells them she's only coming back because I'm due to give birth otherwise she wouldn't (which puts so much guilt and pressure on me)

Despite no longer listening to the news or reading articles on it anymore because it wasn't helping me, I find that everyone I speak to can't wait to tell me how terrible is all is and how it will get worse again! There's just no escape ☹️

I am well aware there could be a second wave, and there could be another lockdown etc etc but I just don't see how getting hysterical about it right now will help anyone 🤷🏼‍♀️

The way I see it is I just have to trust in the experts and do as they say! I will stay in for as long as I have to stay in (which as many probably know is mind numbing with a toddler) and I will go out when I'm told it's safe to do so. I will stick to all the rules and always have (even down to having to go to all my babies heart scans and having to face all the bad news alone because no one can have DS except DH) but that is all I have the power to do! So don't see the point in speculating, stressing, and just being downright pessimistic about life right now!

Does anyone else find that there's an overwhelming urge from everyone they speak to to basically tell you the world is doomed? And does anyone have any positive news to share on the situation?!

If you actually read all the way to here then thank you! Just needed to rant 😅❤️

I agree with you.

Also, you have a lot going on so it's completely understandable that it piles even more pressure on you when people talk about it to you. You've enough to think about.

I hope everything goes well for you and your family op

I am with you. It is really dragging me down and I am sick of hearing about the second wave. I said to my mam the other day we only had one case in our town all week and the response was "one too many"

If it makes you feel better, I had my baby right in the middle of the peak and I had a fantastic experience. Much more attentive than my other births. They really will look after you so well! Hope everything goes well xx

I agree. It's really turned me off Mumsnet, tbh.

Thank you both
Really means a lot ❤️
Just glad it's not just me!

You needed to switch on voting for this one, TJ I'm totally with you, but pretty soon now some will be along to insist you simply don't understand how awful it's all going to be

Just today we've had posts about how billions will die and how it may "overwhelm the whole world" ...

I agree everything and everyone is so negative and worrying about it was doing me no good at all so ive since switched off and ignored any negative news and just nod at people that are catastrophic about it.
I'm sure in time someone else will come forward to look after your ds and i hope your birth goes well with your baby op

Haha @puzzledandpissedoff you are so right it put a smile on my face 😂
MN was probably the wrong place to post if I didn't want negativity 😅

But to be fair now if anyone does arrive to do that i will just laugh 😂

I'm so glad that other people feel the same about the negativity, would it do so much harm to try and look a little bit more positively towards the future and not always such doom and gloom. I did stop coming on here and other social media for a while and I found it all too much.

Agreed.
Get yourself off Social Media and try and only surround yourself with nice calm sane people.
I increasingly think that many of those repeating, usually in really sentimental and weirdly fetishistic ways, how many of us are going to die, are fundamentally simply loving the drama and causing anxiety in others on purpose. I don't know why that would give them joy but it seems to me that it does.
Try to keep yourself away from it - really the only solution! Good luck.

@Puzzledandpissedoff

You needed to switch on voting for this one, TJ I'm totally with you, but pretty soon now some will be along to insist you simply don't understand how awful it's all going to be

Just today we've had posts about how billions will die and how it may "overwhelm the whole world" ...

And prepping for the second wave...

People/media talking about the situation in RL or online isn’t necessarily ‘negativity’ or ‘hysteria’.

If engaging with it online or in RL affecting your mental wellbeing, suggest avoiding or putting boundaries around it. Eg only get your news from a couple of sources you think are decent.

I’ve done things like that at different points since March as I have a MH issue, and it’s helped.

I'd suggest finding the AD (anti dementor) threads in chat - they're full of people who feel the same as you and are a much more positive place:
ADs getting ready - www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/3956633-ADs-getting-ready

And prepping for the second wave...

Just the second wave??
I really don't think you appreciate the gravity of this, Jrob ... what about the third, fourth and every one after that? Don't you realise this is going to go on for ever??

I'd like to see a public enquiry into how the (shit for brains, negative) media has reported this pandemic. I'm sure it has contributed to peoples MH and probably suicides.

On an upbeat note I watched the select committee on sciences and technology and the research into therapeutics and vaccines. It was a, fascinating and b, upbeat and c, how we are blessed in this country with devoted professional academics and d, how they come across as so organised and understanding of the situation and e, how plans are coming together to prevent a second wave and how to tackle it if a second wave does spike.
They are watching the flu season in Australia to see how that pans out because it is a precursor to what we experience in the UK and also watching the new strain of flu in China so they can be ready to manufacture the correct flu vaccine this year. They are also stocked up on medicines that they believe we may need and investigating new an old meds to see if any of them may help.
The trials of the Oxford vaccine is also being tested in Brazil and South Africa because they are now epicentres and we've reduced the cases. The biggest research and test programme on the planet.
They've recruited amazing numbers of people for testing all sorts of drugs and we are leading the world in research.
And most importantly of all how they refute fake news and fake reports on SM and do the research, the testing and only once the evidence is proven that something works and it is proven to be safe is it then announced. An example of that is the hydrocholirquexin (spelling) drug promoted by (shit for brains) Trump and the other European countries like Spain, Italy etc.
And they also believe that countries like Germany got away lucky not because of test trace isolate but because of the Germanic immunity gene (not proven)
They also stated that the pandemic alert system put in in 2009 after the last flu pandemic was kick started at the beginning of February. Unfortunately Covid19 is a novel virus and we had to combat the disease from a blank sheet of paper.
All in all there is still danger, but the good news is that we have the best scientists in the world working on our health and our health system.
It still remains though that the public need to be vigilant, sensible, socially distant and hygienic

I agree with you. I instantly hide all the negative doom and gloom posts that come up now! Fed up of seeing them!

I am being positive about this and I hope for the best possible outcome. I want my son to be able to go back to school. I don't want to hear people only thinking about the worst possible scenario! Let's hope for things to return to some form of normal and that there won't be any second wave :)

@Puzzledandpissedoff

And prepping for the second wave...

Just the second wave??
I really don't think you appreciate the gravity of this, Jrob ... what about the third, fourth and every one after that? Don't you realise this is going to go on for ever??

For a second there I thought you were being serious and was about to pounce on you for your hysteria. I cannot bare to bring that kind of negativity into my life where I would start prepping. Did the first wave not teach us it was entirely unnecessary?

For a second there I thought you were being serious ...

Sorry!! I rather enjoy irony and sometimes get carried away ...

Project fear has certainly achieved its goal. Much more difficult to reverse that fear and get people to think rationally. I am not scared of the virus but I am scared of the erosion of civil liberties and the apparent slow sleep walk into a police state (compulsory masks in shops as just one example of this).

@noego

That all sounds really interesting. Do you have any links??

@Rubychard

No I don't.

It was BBC parliament. Select committees 1st July. That's all I can give you.

@noego

Thanks for that. I'll have a dig about.

I agree with others that the mefua have been shocking. GMB, BBC, all of them really constantly looking for the most negative angle and then reverse ferreting to the exact opposite position a few days later.
Ignore it all and concentrate in your baby. Speak to your midwife to see if your husband can be in during your whole labour. By August it might be possible.
Can one of your friends habe your DS instead. Your mum sounds like a negative drain. What country does she live in?

@noego

I'd like to see a public enquiry into how the (shit for brains, negative) media has reported this pandemic. I'm sure it has contributed to peoples MH and probably suicides.

On an upbeat note I watched the select committee on sciences and technology and the research into therapeutics and vaccines. It was a, fascinating and b, upbeat and c, how we are blessed in this country with devoted professional academics and d, how they come across as so organised and understanding of the situation and e, how plans are coming together to prevent a second wave and how to tackle it if a second wave does spike.
They are watching the flu season in Australia to see how that pans out because it is a precursor to what we experience in the UK and also watching the new strain of flu in China so they can be ready to manufacture the correct flu vaccine this year. They are also stocked up on medicines that they believe we may need and investigating new an old meds to see if any of them may help.
The trials of the Oxford vaccine is also being tested in Brazil and South Africa because they are now epicentres and we've reduced the cases. The biggest research and test programme on the planet.
They've recruited amazing numbers of people for testing all sorts of drugs and we are leading the world in research.
And most importantly of all how they refute fake news and fake reports on SM and do the research, the testing and only once the evidence is proven that something works and it is proven to be safe is it then announced. An example of that is the hydrocholirquexin (spelling) drug promoted by (shit for brains) Trump and the other European countries like Spain, Italy etc.
And they also believe that countries like Germany got away lucky not because of test trace isolate but because of the Germanic immunity gene (not proven)
They also stated that the pandemic alert system put in in 2009 after the last flu pandemic was kick started at the beginning of February. Unfortunately Covid19 is a novel virus and we had to combat the disease from a blank sheet of paper.
All in all there is still danger, but the good news is that we have the best scientists in the world working on our health and our health system.
It still remains though that the public need to be vigilant, sensible, socially distant and hygienic

Hear hear

YANBU OP. I'm so sick of the despair and angst about a second wave - still waiting for the wave that VE day celebrations was supposed to bring, and I suspect the second wave that the BLM protests should've created will also be just as monumental . And then Super Saturday and the pubs opening?!?! Its the end of the world as we know it.

Wishing you all the best with your baby

@Shesingsshangrila

I'd suggest finding the AD (anti dementor) threads in chat - they're full of people who feel the same as you and are a much more positive place: ADs getting ready - www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/3956633-ADs-getting-ready

Oh thanks so much! I've scrolled past these a few times wondering what AD and Anti Dementors meant 🤦🏼‍♀️ this is what I've been needing in my life lol thanks 🙏🏼🤗