If you know someone who has died with Covid-19...

[saylor]

What was their circumstance? I'm curious to see what the "real" picture looks like.

I know of two people:

1. My friends father who was in his mid-70s but in ailing health and my understanding is he had more than one underlying health condition. He probably had another 5 years in him though.

1. My friends grandmother who contracted it in her care home. No underlying health conditions, but she was 99.

Yes, 3 people so far.

I know of several, the youngest being 71 and quite ill with dementia, the others very elderly and frail, at one time I'd have worried about them getting pneumonia but it's Covid seeing them off these days.

My lovely dad. 76 and healthy enough although was a light smoker. Still went to the gym, walked, played bowls.

I don't know anyone who's even had it, let alone died.

So many people in their 70s,which really isn't "elderly" these days . Lots of people in their 70s are fit and healthy, look after their grandkids, travel widely, play sports and could reasonably be expected to live at least another decade.

My own DPs are in their 70s and lead very active lives. DF has hypertension. It's completely controlled by medication and has no impact on his day-to-day life but I believe it makes him more vulnerable to complications from Covid and if he died he would be classified as having an underlying health condition so people might look at the statistics and think he would probably have died soon anyway, which isn't the case. He's been living with it perfectly healthily for years and years.

I know of 5 people, including my FIL and my Mum.

FIL was found collapsed at home, early on before lockdown, ventilated twice but eventually died of kidney failure.

My Mum, very frail with advanced dementia.'

Of the other 3, one was relatively young, early 50's and worked for the NHS. The other two were older 70+ probably with underlying health conditions.

I'm numb with it all TBH.

The 'underlying conditions' label doesn't mean someone is at death's door and due to die any second. It means that their physiology makes them much more at risk of developing complications from this particular virus. Without covid they would have gone on to live a longer life.

There was a really good article on the BBC website about how it affects the body in ways previously unseen in medicine and why people with some conditions are more at risk because of how it attacks the body.

A family friend in a care home in her late 80s. Completely asymptomatic - only discovered when they tested the residents. Unable to talk, mostly sleeping or unaware of visitors, having small amounts of water/shakes, doubly incontinent & bedbound.
She'd been like this for months - occasionally she'd improve for a few days then worsen again, just an existence & they had no idea what she was thinking, if she was aware of her health.
It may well be that despite no symptoms, COVID-19 speeded things up which her family have admitted they view as a blessing. It was very sad they couldn't be there with her.
Not sure how the death was registered.

The underlying conditions thing baffles me. I am in my 40s and have a dicky thyroid. But I take daily medication to fix it and because of that consider myself to be perfectly healthy.
I hope that doesn’t put me in the “likely to die” category.

My mother, my father in law.
Both visited hospital, both died in care homes.

My friend with underlying health issues, caught it in hospital, died in hospital.

As a family we are broken.
We should be rioting in the streets.

I'm not asking for anyone to prove they knew people who have died. Every person who dies is a tragic, personal loss to the people who love them. Nothing can diminish this.

But the stats posted by a previous poster do show that proportionally the number of people who have died compared to the 66 million of us living in the UK is quite small, particularly in the younger age groups. And I thought it was odd that many people on here knew those people.

I don't know any personally, but "know of" quite a few.

3 of my dad's friends have died. All older men, in their late 70s -early 80s. All with some sort of underlying conditions, because very few people get to that she without something being wrong with them. All seem to have caught it in the community before lockdown, having been living their life as normal. None of them were ILL beforehand as their underlying conditions were supposedly well managed.

I teach in a secondary school, and teach approximately 150 pupils. 12 of them have lost a relative to covid. I don't know individual circumstances for each one, as obviously it's not appropriate for me to know that. But 12 kids (just from the ones I teach, there are probably a lot more amongst the ones I don't teach) losing a relative in a couple of months is definitely unusual!

@roff

You are so fortunate. I would give much to have had your experience.

Hearing my dad sob down the phone each night.
Standing at my friend's door and speaking to his wife from a distance, when we are desperate to hug each other.

Waiting the two months between my mother's death and her funeral and working with my dad to pick the ten people who can go to her funeral.

Knowing I can not attend my friend's funeral as he has a large family and the ten allowed at his funeral can not accommodate me.

I would give much to not know anyone who has had this disease.

Keep safe xxx

I know of 3 people personally

Two a friends parents. Both in their late 80s. Both otherwise fit and well but obviously elderly. One went into hospital with what they thought was a uti, died the next day covid +. The other one admitted with covid and died 2 weeks later. Its difficult to know if one died of covid or with covid

The other a work colleague, in her late 50s. She had high blood pressure but no other known underlying conditions.

A big reason in cancelling routine surgery in hospitals is because of the risk of catching it while in hospital. A lot of people have been angry ablut this, but its evident on this threas the risk of being admitted to hospital is fairly high. And with a full hosptial the risk is going to be even greater

Its also why people will have been discharged back to care homes if they were asymptomatic.

DH's friend. He was 38, no underlying health conditions, married with two young DC. Fell ill on a Thursday evening (mild sore throat, bit achy, no cough, mild fever). By the following Monday he was in ICU on a ventilator over 100 miles away because there were no beds locally. He was there for 5 weeks, never regained consciousness, and died two weeks ago. His wife didn't see him again from the day he went into hospital. Only 10 people were allowed at the funeral so DH had to watch it via a video link.

He was a lovely man.

One - an ex colleague, mid 80s and in poor health. He died in a care home.

@cptartapp and @GiantPinesAhem, I'm not really sure what point you are trying to make. Any of us could have an undiagnosed health condition and it wouldn't make our deaths any less tragic

I don't understand this point either. Surely it just makes the numbers of people vulnerable to getting ill with this higher then we know. I also don't understand those who use this as a way of reassuring people or themselves that it is only those with 'underlying conditions' who are at any risk. Surely that would make anyone who is ostensibly healthy and young but worried even more worried, since they also have to contend with the fact that they themselves might have an 'unknown underlying condition'

It is a point I see made all the time on here in response to posts about people dying who might not fit the usual old/ill criteria that they like to comfort themselves with . I don't see the point of then saying that many people have unknown underlying conditions. It doesn't reassure anyone as it means that MORE people are at risk than we can know about. It is bonkers thing to post if you are trying to get people to be more rational about their concept of risk

My fil, who is 83 has been in hospital for 9 weeks with it. Home now, and very very frail and confused. Fingers crossed, but it’s not looking good, he’s been given an end of life kit. Basically morphine. He caught it on hospital, he has dialysis.
2 people from my small town, have been in hospital for weeks. Both healthy, though a bit overweight. Early fifties and early sixties. The older one is home, the other one still in hospital, but off the ventilator.
If you don’t know or know of anybody who has had corona, you are very lucky.
It’s awful.

My uncle. Early 80s lots of underlying issues including diabetes. Caught in his care home.
Local man mid 40s, high BMI. Worked on public transport.
2 colleagues have lost elderley relatives, both men, early 80s.
I also know a 81 year old woman who recovered and 2 people test positive with no symptoms at all.

Relative, early 80's. Went into hospital with an infection, caught Covid in the hospital and died there.

To catch it in hospital is totally, totally unacceptable in my book.

I only count about 5 posts here re people in the 25-44 category (assuming that those mentioned without a specific age ie mid 40s or 40s are above that).
Although anecdotes are data, I think a thread like this actually brings it home more, it is so easy for the individuals to get lost behind the statistics.
I don’t know anyone who died, know of a friends ex who spent several weeks on a ventilator, off it now but likely to have ongoing issues. Early 60s. Also a few younger people who caught it and recovered.

Anecdotes are NOT data (obv).

I only count about 5 posts here re people in the 25-44 category (assuming that those mentioned without a specific age ie mid 40s or 40s are above that).

While that might suggest that the risk is very low for this age category, being 45+ is hardly old!

My Dad's death certificate says gastric cancer and listed underneath it is COVID-19.

He was diagnosed with gastric cancer two years ago, fought it like a warrior, still worked physical job. He was 67. Also had metastatic liver cancer.

On 25th March he went into a hospice for respite/pain management and then on 30th April he died. He spent 5 weeks in hideous pain as the cancer had also metastised to his spine.

Hours before he died he was tested for the virus. The day after he died his results came back positive. He developed a slight cough 5 days earlier.

At the moment I feel like his two year battle is discredited by COVID-19. Cancer killed him, not the virus, yet he is a pandemic statistic.

Luckily I saw him every single day at the hospice, surprised me and my Sister and our immediate families haven't shown symptoms. We isolated from the day of his death for 2 weeks.

Mn is a big site. Its not that unlikely that of the 350 odd under 45s that died 11 MNers know one.

I think someone younger dying is probably more talked about, and the news more wide reaching. Plus more MNers are probably in the 20-44 age bracket.

Im also not sure about the people dying have unknown underlying health conditions point. Any of us could have unkown underlying health conditions, it doesnt make you any safer.