I made my little girl cry

[XxrosesxX]

So today my DD school sent out the rough plan of action for June 1st. Up until this point I had been hopeful my five year old could go back to her "normal" school life for a term before summer and year one.

I knew they were going to perhaps have less kids in. But opening the email today I just feel it's wrong to be opening. They are removing alot of toys, books and furnishing from the classroom. There will be strict rules in place and social distancing will be in place but they are warning us now it won't happen! Then it goes on to explain they may be in different classes with different teachers. They will be in smaller groups. All this will depend on the staff levels. Also they won't be allowed near other year groups and pick up times will be staggered.

My DD has been fine. I've kept it light. There
are germs. They are being cleaned. Then you can go back to school. I tried to gently explain and talk to her today. I explained she was allowed to maybe go back to school in two weeks. I explained how it might be different. Her eyes welled up. She nodded at Me. I asked her why she looked sad. She burst into tears and asked me if she will ever be in her classroom again and she didn't want to go into year one. I told her I didn't know who she would be with but some of her friends will be there. She carried on crying. I told her she was ok to stay with mummy until September. She wiped her eyes and said I'll stay here I think until the germs are gone.

I'm just sad for her. Isn't it horrible having to try and do the best for your child. One option is to go 5 months without her lovely school routine. The other is to send her to a strict place where she could pick up allsorts if anxieties.

I really don't want her worried,anxious and emotional. I feel like I can't fully protect her from the truth. I think she is starting to realise today what's going on and it's making her sad.

I'm sad for her. All that routine she had built up. Her relationship with her teacher. Her little friends who has started inviting her to parties. She will never be with those kids again in her first class again. Theres 3 classes next year so only 1/3 will be in with her.

I know she will be ok. But tonight Ive sent the form to say I won't be sending her. So therefore it's official. She won't be going back into reception. That first year is over. Whilst it's not the most important educationally it sets the foundations.

To be honest I'm not hopeful that schools will be running normally in September either. It's all a mess. All the money we've wasted on uniforms etc.

I know we are lucky to be home and safe. It's just ridiculous how Boris is reopening the schools! Not good for mental health at all.

I would not mention school again for a week or so.
5 is very little, bless her.

Hate it so much 😭

Oh bless her heart . It's ridiculous even contemplating sending schools back. Kids naturally instinct is to be joined at the hip to their friends. What about play times etc. Just stupid.
If DS was in school he wouldn't be going in either until September

Oh, bless her heart. I'm.going to have to talk to my Y3 about it soon but I'm waiting to find out more. I don't want to get her hopes up about going back only to have to tell her as school have said 'school will be very different to the one the children left in March'...honestly makes me feel so sad.

Aww bless you both. It's so harsh isn't it.

Sadly this is the reality of people shouting for the schools to go back

The best chance we have if the school s being more 'normal' in Sept is to lock down harder now for a few weeks.

Parents need to say no, head teachers need to say they're not opening, the unions need to tell the govt NO

We have "prepared" our eyfs and year 1 classrooms today ready for nursery, reception and year 1 to return and the staff have cried too. It goes against everything we believe in but we need to make it "as safe as it can be" and follow the guidance (woolly as f**k) to remove all soft furnishings, soft toys and others that cannot be wiped clean easily.

No play dough, no play houses outside, no carpets, no sand, no water tray..the list goes on! It has broken our hearts.

We had a lengthy discussion re: children's mental health and we, as professionals and mums, believe that the mental health of children will be damaged MORE by sending them into school with these measures than keeping them at home if you can do so safely.

Not one member of school staff is sending their own children into their school if they have an alternative-it's not safe, don't send your children unless you have no choice. It's not the right time yet

Teachers should be fined for scaremongering. You have been coerced into making the choice you have.

Mine is year one and shielded so obviously not going back anyway but if he wasn't, I still wouldn't send him.
I couldn't bear the thought of the social distancing and how different it would be. Possibly a different classroom and possibly a different teacher.

I honestly think the decision to send back reception and Y1 is the most nonsensical decision. Y5 and Y6 might have been more doable in terms of the pupils being old enough to understand the need for such changes in their school routine. Your poor dd.

How have teachers been scaremongering? The classroom expectations are as per the government guidance

@Blockpavingpath, out of interest, how have teachers been 'scaremongering'?

No scaremongering at all. These are facts.

How has op been coerced?

I think you need to deal with this differently. She's 5. I know that you're worried, but talking in an anxious and anxiety-provoking way about germs isn't going to help; nor is drawing a huge amount of attention to social distancing rules in school. Her tears may well be only a reaction to your worried manner of delivery.

I was talking to a friend today; she and her husband are both hospital consultants and their children (5 and 7) have been in school throughout. She said that although they found it weird at first they're now completely used to it, play different games in the playground and enjoy school as much as before. (To the point of not wanting to have half term, when my friends had booked leave, off at all!) She also said that her younger child (same age as mine, who has mostly been fucking about on YouTube while I work) has improved rapidly at reading because he's getting lots of individual attention from one of the classroom assistants, and is starting on chapter books.
She wasn't boasting, but it was a reminder to me that my own son needs to go back to school soon unless I'm to quit work and devote myself to teaching him. (Even if I did, I'm not sure how much good it would do. I'm a university professor but I don't have a clue about how to teach 5 year olds.)

For your child's sake you need to be brave and positive, and unless you have a clear reason not to send her back you should send her in and make the most of it. It's not just about a 'lovely school routine', it's about avoiding her falling behind in ways that will have long term consequences. A child who can read quite fluently at the end of reception (a learned skill, and not an indication of intelligence in itself) and who then reads over the summer is looking at a very different educational future from a child who has already lost the skills that they were acquiring in the second term. Same with maths. Most reception children will be nowhere near the standard normally expected in year one after six months off school. In the short term, that might not appear to matter because they're only being compared to their own peer group. But in the long term that comparison set will vanish, and a child who gets a bad educational start (because each skill is a little building block on which the next is built) may suffer a lifelong loss of income and opportunities. It's the same logic as getting infants tested for hearing loss and other problems. For an adult, six months of subpar hearing may merely be an annoyance. For a two-year old it can have long-lasting negative effects on language development. Or the same logic as the finding that students who graduate from college in a recession have a lifelong loss of income, as a result or more fragile and worse-paid first jobs.

@blockpathingpath utter nonsense and you know it. Unless you work in a school and can see what we're having to do to make school "as safe as it can be" don't make such ridiculous comments.

The only people who think schools should reopen at this time are people without children, who don't know any teachers and who read the Daily Mail!

😔

@Passtherioja I don't need nursery for childcare, which obviously affects my decision however your post has confirmed my worries about how much the environment will have changed. I get the reasoning behind removing soft toys and messy play etc, however it really changes what the setting can offer and I think the children will suffer.

@MasterBruceBalloon I wish I could offer more reassurance but I really can't.

Staggered starts, practically empty classrooms, staff who cannot hug children if they are hurt or upset... it's just awful!

I let my school in each morning and a huge amount of children hug me before they go in...am I meant to put me, and my children, and my very elderly parents at risk by letting them hug me..or do I tell them not to, and for my little ones recoil.

I have known most of my school since they were 3 or since they were born if they have older siblings. They will be horrified by the changes in school and ethos. This is not the right time.

The key worker kids at our school love it. My kids are at home and have had SD drummed into them but they are desperate to go back, under any new regime and they'll go as soon as they can. They understand it all. They don't care what groups or teacher. It's just miles better than two working parents and 2 months with only a sibling to play with

The settings will be utterly different. However, my Yr5 child was in tears tonight at the idea of not going back until July as she just wants her friends and my Yr3 child is losing skills. He can do the set tasks but I noticed today his writing isn't as neat, his use of basic grammar has got worse as has his spelling.
DH and I have been working insane hours since the schools went into shut down and, whilst we are supervising DC2 doing his work for an hour or so a day, my focus has been on, for example, use of apostrophe's or whatever that day's learning intention and I've overlooked the fact that we're supposed to go through and then discuss the mistakes.

I’m sorry this is so hard. I sit on the governors board of a school (not in the UK), and plans for next year for the younger classes include giving them the teacher they had last year for some stability. So Reception will have the same teacher in Y1 as they did last year at least for a transition period. While that’s not ideal for teachers, it’s probably helpful for students to have some normality. Not sure if you could ask if your school is thinking of that?

@bombaychef have your key worker children been kept 2m apart all day? No sharing of resources?

I have seen some horrendous breeches on school Facebook pages and what worries me is if a key worker child gets it then infects the other key worker children then we wipe our the key worker staff.

@sergeilavrov I might steal that idea if that's ok?

@Passtherioja absolutely!

at 5 schooling will make no difference, they will probably not even remember that much. just try and be as normal as possible and move on.