I know IABU but I am totally fed up of lockdown

[detachablehoof]

So. I know I have an awful lot to be thankful for. My family are all in good health, we have no change in our income (yet), my husband is able to work from home, we have a big garden and had plenty of nice weather to enjoy it. There's just us two and our toddler in our house. We're a lot more fortunate than many.

But... I quite honestly don't know how much longer I can stand it. I'm grieving our old life, missing my parents so much, and finding it SO HARD to keep my toddler occupied at home.

I just want to go back to normal 😭 and it doesn't look like there will be a "normal" for a while. It's all just so uncertain and indefinite. It feels like there is nothing to look forward to any more and every day is a chore.

Anyone want to offer some solidarity?

ugh
that analogy has made me feel ill so I will hide the thread now!

I started watching this thread when it was first started, planned to contribute later but when I got back to it there were so many belittling and non-empathetic messages that actually put me into a downward spiral. I had to hide the thread and am only ow feeling strong enough to revisit it. I’m heartened by the more recent responses and want to lend my voice to those offering support to the folk really struggling with this.

I’m really not coping. On the surface, I should be ok and probably fall into the category of people who look like they are struggling with diamond shoes. Underneath though I am crumbling. I tried to kill myself when I was 16. I’m 42 now and have made sure to be thankful every day that I failed because there is so much to enjoy in life. The problem is now that all these things that I enjoy, the things that made me grateful to be alive, have gone and might not ever come back. I don’t want a new normal. I want to wake up and find this has all been a bad dream, or not wake up at all. Many of these things that I enjoy probably seem frivolous to lots of people but they are my lifeline and right now, with nothing on the horizon to look forward to and the prospect of my life changing completely including the fact that the industry DH and I work in has been hit hard so one or both of us will likely lose our job and then our home, I just feel that there is no point to anything anymore and the cheer up, be mindful, think of those worse off messages just make me feel worse – not only is there no point to my life, but I’m also selfish to boot.

NotaDiva “ The problem is now that all these things that I enjoy, the things that made me grateful to be alive, have gone and might not ever come back”

This.

Of course life will go back to normal. It maybe a different normal to what we have been used to for a while until a vaccine is found. But we have to expect change for a while to protect those most vulnerable.

Nearly normal won't improve anything for me. Unless schools and childcare go back more or less as normal I won't be able to look for a job to get out of the stay at home mum rut. DH's job isn't easy to work around (on call evenings and weekends plus working 9-5 anyway) so anything I do has to fit (logistically) around school/after school club and childcare.

So part weeks/odd days of school at least give a break but prolong the pain of no job, nothing to look forward to wtf is the point.

I did have some self worth through sports and sport based volunteering, also gone.

Realised too late I'm not cut out to be a stay at home mum, relocated to try and get back to work (although good job for DH facilitated the move at least part of the aim was to get me working) and yet I'm still stuck at home trying and failing to balance the needs of an 18 mo and a 4 year old.

So yeah lockdown sucks, everything sucks and what's the point?

Yep. A new normal, have to expect change etc is all true but not in the least bit helpful.

The longer this lockdown goes on, the greater the risk of me losing my job. Not just my job but my career. There are less than 10 roles like mine in my region and at least half of these will go. I have trained and studied for the best part of 13 years and I love what I do. I will not be able to walk into another job at the same salary. My DH is in the same boat. So this flippant "new normal" is actually us losing our income and probably our home.

I do understand that the vulnerable in society need to be protected from this virus but the measures put in place to protect them are creating an awful lot more vulnerable people.

A vaccine could be 18 months minimum. This cannot go on like this. I cannot go on like this. I am following the rules and will continue to do so but we need an exit strategy which addresses ways of living alongside the threat of the virus while not risking the economy, mental health, cancer and other non-COVID sufferers etc

The problem is now that all these things that I enjoy, the things that made me grateful to be alive, have gone and might not ever come back

Yes, this, Notadiva.

NotaDiva you might find this interesting

inproportion2.talkigy.com/

When we try and engage politicians, we really need to emphasise that this being done for the most ludicrous “reasons”.

Me to, I’m done
Got made redundant, no wages this month, found a new job (but less hours) just found out the hours have been cut even more so lost 1/3 of my wages
Fed up of being in the house
There’s no end in sight, no holidays, no meals out, no fun
Everything is just mundane
Everything is stressful
Meanwhile DH is off on 100% pay enjoying it like a holiday, with a secure job to return too
All the shit happens to me, so pissed off

So this flippant "new normal" is actually us losing our income and probably our home.

Not being flippant at all.
I've had to adapt to so many new normals in my life following tragedy. This will be yet another one to get used to and find our way through.

My job, my dp's job are at risk too.

The next few months threaten to put sex equality for women at work - access to stable jobs with equal (or at least regular) pay, promotion, progression - back by about 20+ years. Who is most likely to be managing staggered school starts and staggered year groups, moves in and out of lockdown etc? It’s crap.

I’m the same, 2 teenagers & a 9 yr old at home, my DH is still working, annoyed at the family photos on social media where both parents at home & the caption ‘look what we’ve done today’ or ‘enjoying family time’ I just think fuck the fuck off! Everyday is the same, eating same foods, watching same programs, trying to get my youngest to do any kind of work is impossible, I’ve had my eldest DD on the phone in tears because she is so stressed looking after her little one. I think I just need a good weep in my bathroom on my own & some wine afterwards

I think this is the week that any "novelty" has really worn off for anybody, regardless of their circumstances. But I would rather extend the lockdown now, than go back to "normal", and have to go back into lockdown, for an even longer period in the summer or autumn. Lockdown now also gives us time to adjust to the fact that "the way life used to be" is most likely gone. The pandemic is going to change most areas of lives. Sorry to break it to you.

26000+ deaths in the UK and all you’ve been asked to do is stay home with no doubt all home comforts

Grow Up !

me too. waiting for 6pm so I can have a tequila!

Remember you are SAFE AT HOME. NOT STUCK AT HOME. Yes it's boring but you are protecting your parents by staying away and you are protecting yourself and child staying in. It'll all be over before we know it.

Me too, we r ok at home, but every time I see a queue for a shop I need to use I feel.like screaming. I can't see an end to the queues anytime soon either.

@Oscarsdaddy right !!

@PheasantPlucker1

I've asked them to tweet Chris Whitty. Absolutely genius. Made my day 😂

Everyone feels the same . Nobody can say they are enjoying it and are having fun!!! As you say you are very lucky so keep that in your mind and think how much worse it could be . Sorry I’m not very sympathetic but as a key worker seeing people dying every day I really don’t have much sympathy for your situation

@minmooch says it. "Have had to adapt...". We will all have to do this. It's really important to model this to our children, we are women, we spend most of our lives adapting to new circumstances. We have to suck it up, be strong for our kids, but then go in the bathroom, cry and drink wine!

@Mikki77 yes, is it 6 yet?

Remember you are SAFE AT HOME. NOT STUCK AT HOME.

No, I’m stuck at home. And I’m betting the people currently dealing with mental health crises aren’t feeling very SAFE from those at home.

FFS people are putting up with a hell of a lot here, not just being a bit bored. People are allowed to have feelings about it.

I am totally fed up with people Moaning
Yes it’s difficult, nearly impossible but people NEED To STOP breaking the rules ffs
So this lock down works , otherwise we will all loose more loved ones more jobs .
Maybe start thinking about what the point is off lock down.
Stay home Please