Chemo. No hospital bed for DH.

[OneOfTheGrundys]

So DH’s medical team say he needs an inpatient bed now.
We’re stuck in the outpatients hotel and no bed forthcoming because of corona. He’s rapidly becoming neutropenic and there are no beds available.
This is actually happening today, now. I am stressed beyond belief.

I'm so sorry this is happening, fucking hell this makes me so angry. Boris Johnson should hang his head in shame :(

I’ve just left him. Haematology ward are taking no visitors at all.
I’m so upset. Just crying in the street, on the train.
Unless there are massive exceptions they will allow no visitors on the ward. I just feel I am letting him down at his most vulnerable. Although I know that leaving him is the right thing to do.

Oh sweetheart, you haven't let him down. Far, far from it. You've advocated for him and pushed for him to get the bed he needs. He'll be so well cared for now, and that's because of you.

You have NOT let him down. You are doing the best you can under almost impossible circumstances. When my DH was having HSCT he really appreciated getting cards daily. Even when he was feeling his worst, they helped a bit. Can you write a proper old fashioned letter to your DH? Also, my DH slept a LOT of the time. And the nurses were absolutely wonderful - they really cared for him as a person, not just a patient.

Hang on in there, and take what rest you can. You need your strength too, for when he comes home.

He knows you have done all you can. He is in good hands now. How long will he be there, do you think?

So easy to forget about all the other stuff - that isn't coronavirus - that's going on now... Hope he's ok.

You have been so fantastic

Be glad they are admitting no visitors, it may be that decision that keeps your DH safe. And FaceTime on WhatsApp lots.

Thank you. Nearly home.
I’ll have a good cry in the bath then together face for the kids in the morning.
Thank you for your kindness. X

I am so sorry. I have a severe heart problem and was due to have open heart surgery within the next two weeks. My hospital is only doing emergency surgeries so I am now waiting until my condition becomes immediately life threatening. Although I didn’t fancy being in ITU at the same time as Covid-19 was hitting the UK, I am really, really anxious about the longterm consequences of the delay. I’m relatively young, but already developing heart failure and delays will only make it worse.

I imagine that he knows how much you love him and that you would be there if you could, and that counts for so much even though you have to be at a physical distance. I know it must be heart wrenching. Will be thinking of you and your family.

Lovely, you getting him into hospital was the absolutely best thing you could do for him. Can you get another cheap tablet etc if the hospital has wifi, or buy a 4g thingy and then you can get the nurses to prop it up on his table so you can watch him and he can watch the kids play? So you feel connected and just leave it running all day if the kids aren't aware?
Please reach out to your friends, i would be there for you if you were my friend x

Sending you strength and best wishes. You've done exactly what needed to be done. Now rest and look after yourself and let the professionals look after your dh. Take good care.

Oh Iris I can empathise. The balancing of do we do it now or wait was a thing for us too. Ours went a ahead, unwisely we see now but hindsight’s 2020... are there alternative ways to support your heart in the meantime?
Home now, eaten, fil collected me from station and DS1 there to surprise me in the back.
Taken a sleeping pill and hoping to check out of life for a bit.
He’s not answering texts so I’m hoping he’s asleep.
Thank you all for your kindness. You are good and kind people.

Just came back to see how you were getting on. So glad he’s been admitted but honestly my heart hurts for you, it must be so hard. Thinking of you all

Thank you for all your kind words and thoughts.
He texted this morning to say he feels a bit better and they’re monitoring his heart and giving him iv meds now.
We may not see him now for weeks. We will be posting him things every day. I’m glad the ward is shut and that they are taking all possible measures to protect him and the other vulnerable patients.

mumsnets classics - for you (and dh maybe) to distract yourself

Oh, op, I'm glad he has been admitted and is being looked after. What a horrible situation.

I'm glad he's feeling a bit better- it must be such a relief to you that he's able to text.

It's going to be a difficult time for you- look after yourself.

Thank you!
I’ll send him through the link!

Yes, he’s a bit more alert now it seems.

You haven't let him down at all OP. He's in the best place, and while it's not ideal you just have to let the hospital get on with his treatment. Look after yourself.

He's definitely in the best place. I'm neutropenic permanently and they are always so good with me in hospital

I cant add anything. But sending good wishes. Hope they have a solution soon.

This is so so heartbreaking to read and OP you are so brave too. I really do feel we are in unprecedented times - I can’t get my head round all that is going on. for you OP.