30s TTC. It was the BESHt of times,it was the worst of times, it was the age of rummaging in gussets, drinking gin.....

[ginhag]

C'mon in BESHes to the beach bar...sprawl on comfy sofas while you wiggle your toes in the sand and watch a glorious sunset....and drink brightly coloured cocktails with sparklers in. Cos we're classy,innit.

I've got Adam and joe in as barmen, and we have a rather nice Cave of Gloom in the corner for those 'whyyyyyy meeeeeeee???' moments. We have a reggae sound system playing mob barley's greatest hits. It's a sunshine paradise!

Newcomers welcome,as long as they drag along a bucket of black humour and a vast amount of gin. And please note,some of us have been here so long we have forgotten the real world almost entirely.

Now,who's getting the next round in?

SaltedPopcorn there are lots of townie wankers Londoners here!

Ha ha, couldn't resist...

V about the MC, ChocolateSaltyBalls. Big gropey hugs

PS Aries, I do find that v interesting about the Boer War G-Gp, btw. According to them, I am the only person alive who knows and can recite a certain Boer War music hall song* (taught to me by my maternal GD). This is my sole claim to fame, such as it is. Would love to see your ancestor's stuff in the Museum itself.

PPS Far too many Soft Southern Shites altogether for my liking, full stop!

*Long and boring story.

Oh by the way, Aries and Salty: an Oyster card is a cashless method of paying for transportation on the special Underground Railway.

It was shit, but it just wasn't meant to be. Makes me terrifiedslightly anxious that it will happen again, should I ever be lucky enough to get diffed (see! See how I catch on to the lingo!!)

How about y'all? How long have you been cheering your ovaries on?

Wine with that folic acid anyone?

But how do you get the oyster to go into the slot?

Oyster card? Oyster card? Av ee seen such thing as they, Salty? Made from real oysters are they? Down our way pilchards are used as currency.

SING SCORPS!

Pilchards? You must be right posh like.....I 'av to buy my way using my womanly charms such as thy are....

SING! SING! SING!

Fanks for cheering me and making me giggle you lufferly lot. I'm off to bed with Graham Greene. He knows how to treat a girl badly.

Do you love us yet, Salty? Do you? Do you? .

*One day knowing that'll win me a pub quiz. Trufax.

I think I might just love you.... or is that just the drink talking

Even better idea - dress up as Marie Lloyd and perform the Boer War song in a music hall. Oh oh oh! The next Palais can be an Edwardian music hall!! Or is that a shit idea?

("Music hall sir? Again...absolutely love it"
"That's funny sir because I thought you said..."
"Not now George.")

I like it Aries, I like it.

I think the menkul has finally found me over here. Feeling a bit overwhelmed and needy and lonely suddenly. Tis fine. Will go to bed soon.

Don't be lonely . Feel the love.

OMG, BRAINWAVE! I am SO gonna win next year's BGT with my heartwarming rendition of 'The Baby's Name', all gussied up Marie-Lloyd stylee!

I want a Edwardian Music Hall Palais too! 'Ere, Heady, do you know the piano's on me foot?

Saltshaker, 10 shitty months of TTC for me (would be 12, but have taken 2 month break for medical shiz). But am 37, which technically makes it 5 yrs

Oh fanks Aries

I don't want to POAS. I hate the hollow feeling that follows . So then it's easer to live in hope and only have one disappointment rather than a disappointment after a test AND a disappointment when the beeping starts, do you get me?

Not in bed just yet so love to tag while I'm here. Is all h'rifically overwhelming, sausage. Hold on and grit teeth and it will pass. But that you're feeling it.

You hum it, I'll fetch the arnica

The old ones are the best.

Which is what my Zita West CD is telling my ovaries, hopefully

One for the road and then I'm off downs a sloe gin

Night all

Note to self: do not do an impression of Krist Novoselic being hit in the head with his own bass at the MTV awards when you are still recovering from a laparoscopy. OUCH.

I have finished the blanket! And it didn't fall apart. It looks really good, apart from all the bits I screwed up.

Need pics! You know where

Done, v.bad picture though.