30s TTC - We Started TTC When the LAST Coalition Government Was In Power

[Muser]

BESH is BACK for Spring. Come in, admire the cocktail bar stylings I have created for you. It's all lowlights and smooth sounds, and there's a rehearsal room in back for the GLEE practice.

The barman are beautiful, the Pit has been well stocked with beanbags and gin. So roll up all you 30-something BESHies who stopped counting cycles sometime in the last century, and grab a martini.

usually leads to bruised elbows and broken spectacles.

All the BESHt for tomorrow, Scorpula

I know, Aries, just joshin' I realise I am being way OTT and rubbish about it all, too!

I shall ask if I'm allowed to put my wooden spoon under the hospital bed as soon as I get there.

scorpodidodah hope all goes fine tomorrow. Will be thinking of you.

ginnyreckon & headgirl am so excited about beshfest tomorrow. Booze and my beshgirls = win. If anyone else is in thatLondon and wants a pint tomorrow evening, email me at perfectdromedary at gmail dot com and I'll pass on deets.

Me too camiknickers! hopefully stew will find your post more useful than mine...

It will be great to see you again my luvver. Incidentally I have discovered that the pub next to my hotel has a large sunny terrace so could poss be a good place for late afternoon/early eve before going on to the other place to have wine and food...

is alicedoesn'tlivehereanymore still coming?

By the way I am currently taunting myself with madness. No droid yet. Was due today or maybe yesterday. So not exactly late. And of course I have already tested as I am a nobjockey. Pretty much a nada. This am there was the faintest shadow,still a 'NO YOU RIDICULOUS AND DESPERATE WOMAN' but a cause for a bit of obsessive holding stick in various lights type stuff for a while

meh.

On that basis - tequila?

Hahahaha. I don't need a night under canvas,all I have to do is post here that I have a small mad thought that it could be possible...

And gusset watch reveals the red stuff. Still,I was fairly sure I was being delusional and now I can a) drink with impunity and b) join the June spunkfest.

Tequila anyway tho cam... bollocks that it won't vw able to work it's dr Frankenstein madness but still...

vw??? be. Pressing random keys,never the best way to communicate...

Well helloooooooo ladies.

Have just emailed PD. I await the magic passwords with awe...

Pasty - a shadow? A shadow?!?!? Pliz to join in menkulness. Ooh, no, I already have . Piss on another, go on, for me...

Big fertile babycave vibes to shaggy. Aries - constellation? As in we're just going for the right first letter now? If so I'm going to call you Agamemnon for a bit. Come on Agamemnon, shag, shag thee to the hilt.

There was not as much surprise to the news of my 6 foot long vajayjay as I expected. Clearly you all suspected thus already. Bitches.

Ah bollocks to the crosspost. Sorry Ginsters. More drinky for you tomorrow night then.

Love from FurlongFanny

StuFrancis (I may keep calling you that for a while,I rather like it) I was very amused by your vagina post.

Oh god sorry I am now thinking of 'vagina post' as being like 'tyra mail' on ANTM. I have no idea why.

Anyway,I'm sure that your fanjo is tall,willowy and elegant,and that the comment was based solely on admiration of your lovetunnel's supermodel type shape

Ginty I too am liking vaginapost. I may have to get some appropriately shaped envelopes printed up.... NOT just extra long ones, before any of you beyatches suggests it...

I have ze passwords

The brown owl sings at dawn.

Having read all the above all I could think of was Famous Quote From Famous British Sitcoms Of The Late Twentieth Century. Ie, the gag about the whore who had her legs open so often she had to be buried in a Y-shaped coffin (that's for you Score), and that other gag about having a twat like a clown's pocket (for you, Cass, with love). Neither of those are as funny as us

Score darling I would be every bit as nervy as you. Even knowing that all will be well, and all will be well, and all manner things will be well*, I would still fret. Peace and blessings to you dear. Please to provide regular updates.

*To quote Julian of Norwich. Pretentious? MOI?!

someone else got there first

Ooooh hagsters. Dunno where to start from. Been absent so long. Just lurked back on some old posts, and there's too much going' on!! Dat deleted fred and HeadBug being a hero and all dat.

I have been mid exams and studying pretty hard and hanging with people half me age. While I am loving it, I think it is turning me into a weirdo. I keep on insulting grown up friends. Seriously. I appologise in advance.

Anyhoo, I neglected the palace! I really think I owe everyone a round of the sinthe and gin. Drinks on me the whole night! Well, for an exchange value of a grope and a wet snog. So gather round ye BESHes!

As for baybee making, well, where do I start from? I think I reported on crappy spunk results, which they did not release to me, but I had a glimpse and it's something like volume 0.8 ml, 7.5 million swimmers, blahdie blah. Anyway, the man could go and pay 50 p and get them but we thinks what da point given we've been referred to the fertility clinique and I am sure they'll tell us more there. Had a choice, St Barts in June or UCL in July. Went for UCL cause it's in da hood and they are good and we do all our stuff there, but now wondering if should have opted for earlier. AAAAnyway, don't wanna be too me me me and bonkin' me so I'll stop there.

I was trying to remember when I first entered the palais. I think it was January. I am obviously on some soul searching trip...

Went to a 'citizenship party' (Yank turned into a Brit and was really proud of the whole thing.) and it was filled with kids. Didn't make me feel bad at all or even any more broody. Is that weird?

Anyway, sorry for the me post, I am finidng it hard to catchup on everything and join conversations mid-post as it were, but will get there.

I love you all. I kick you all lazy cows and throw you down the pit. Oooohhhh, how's Mitchell?

Best of luck for tomorrow Scorps.

Hello MoveAnyMountain, don't worry about neglecting us, sounds like you have had loads on.

Stewpot did you really just google Vagina Envelopes?!

OMG, GIRLCRUSH! Headgirl, I heart Julian of Norwich so much and I quote that saying so often. BUT I had forgotten it in all my anxiety and shall be repeating it in the AM. 12 hours from now, I shall just have been sedated. Getting butterflies now. Also girlcrush for quoting BlackAdder Season 2 (nerd alert!). In fact, am so nerdy, I know that the Y-shaped coffin quip is from Ep 2, Season 2. Dear God, what have I become?

Aaaaanyway , all your lovely words are really making me feel warm 'n' fuzzy inside. I'm such a worrying fool.

At least all the medical to and fro will take my mind off not being able to attend the BESHmeet Try not to laugh too much at my neuroticism when discussing those not present Can I ask one favour, pliz pliz PLIZ? Pliz to take lots of photos and post them You Know Where so those of us not Southern enough to enjoy the event can enviously feast our eyes on the shenanigans and dream...

SCORPETTE SAYS DO IT! DOOOO IIIITTTT!

And gin - ARSEROCKETS to the metal bastard. As you say, we seasoned BESHes don't even need the mention of c**ping anymore Go put the Gin in Gin Hag, seeing as you're too lush to embody the Hag bit

I love you caaaaaahs!

Welcome to being British, MounteousBosoms. You now have to treat favourable weather forecasts as headline news, and view the prospect of A Nice Cup Of Tea with the same joy and glee with which most nations greet full-scale street carnivals.

Love from Headbanger, at "Generalisations R Us".

Lucks a-plenty for Next Steps. I always think of July as being a very fecund sort of month...

Gin luvva, trying not to squeal, but didn't our own dear PollingBooth begin with a very faint line, pix of which posted here??? though obviously secretly I want you to not be differed, so that tomorrow I can ply you with GHB* Tanqueray...

*That's in really bad taste isn't it? Sorry...

PS You could post copies of THIS book in your vagina envelopes! Handy!

I'm not clicking on that - Semen based recipes?!

I am laughing so hard the OM thought I was weeping at Bad News.

Blackadder the second!!!!!! I got it, I got it!!!!

Oh. Am disappointed. Scorps got there first.

My entire sense of humour is based on Blackadder and Monty Python quotes. Entire.