30s TTC - We Started TTC When the LAST Coalition Government Was In Power

[Muser]

BESH is BACK for Spring. Come in, admire the cocktail bar stylings I have created for you. It's all lowlights and smooth sounds, and there's a rehearsal room in back for the GLEE practice.

The barman are beautiful, the Pit has been well stocked with beanbags and gin. So roll up all you 30-something BESHies who stopped counting cycles sometime in the last century, and grab a martini.

Awwww stoppit! Actually, don't . Am cooking flatbreads and baba ganoush and poaching a chicken with puy lentils (Guardian reader? ME?! or I'd explain, though seriously I just kept prodding her is all. Oh and ended on the words: "You, madam, are an unmitigated little cunt." Which I am proud of and I don't care how childish that is.

Well sounds as though I've missed a dramatic afternoon. I don't wish to pry, but WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED???Headbanger - sounds as though you cut the bitch down and spat out the pieces . COME ON! (sorry for my over-enthusiastic usage of capital letters)

Also, hello Eggs'n'Bac. I remember you from a while back and wondered what had happened to you. Sounds as though you had an mc - am really sorry to hear that.

Louby-Lou - Mike Phillips eh? Will cheer for the Bluebirds, even though I hate football!

Pliz not to cheer for Cardiff City but for Blackpool tomorrow - tiz mine and HO's home town, and he is travelling to Wembley to watch the match. Is your chap going Lozza? They could have a BESMan meety uppy.

Or a footy hooligan fight . Err, on reflection, let's just leave it .

Well Lyra Cardiff City are mine and Lozza's home team innit . Do you want some?

Did I mention my boxing prowess a little earlier, Aries? I believe I did. So yes, thank you, I will "have some". See you aahhtside.

Bloody hell, I go to work for 4 hours and look what I've missed! Will someone please give us a rundown of the Amy bitch troll thread? Well done to Head, sounds like you really put her in her place but I need details.. wtf was it all abaaahhht?

Oh God was I wrong about Eggybread? Fucksticks. Please can I ask your forgiveness if so?

I am a twat.
I am a twat
I am a twat.
I am a twat,
I am a twat
I am a TWAT

Aries, I believe she had had 1+ MCs when she joined us back in March, but from stalkerage it appears that she is now thoroughly diffed (similar dates to our Poll).

The sequence of events was not made clear by me and Gin posting back and forth, so don't you dare beat yourself up. Eggy herself misread a post regarding Gin's MC, so will hardly hold it against you. You were being NICE, you are not a twat.

Am maybe just having a low self esteem, self flagellation day. Oh well. Tomorrow is another day.

Bravo 'ead and eggs. God, I wish I still had such a talent with words. Too many years of local journalism fried my brain (warning, scorps, please stick with the intileckshall stuff )

Gutted the thread is gone. There was a few gems worth lifting there.

There were. Told you my brain was fried!

I feel a bit sad that Scorps missed it, she would have loved it. Headmistress has a copy saved!

I missed all the fun and instead spent all day
driving. Hedwig pliz to share? And who dared upset gin? I'll ave em.

I NEED THAT COPY NOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! Stop rubbin' it in, LyraSilvertongue!

scorpylovely

there's a thread in AIBU that gives some idea. It's the 'what happened to the NCT thread' one. Where our ead is described as a 'beautiful beautiful woman' [proud]

was a very long thread so hard to synopsise... Was also really quite weird. I didn't even manage to read the whole thing but was upset just by reading the OP.

Actually this thread here has the actual OP in it.

That's the bit that made me cry. For reasons that I think you guys understand.

Gin, you are a better Mum to Mani than that stoopid caaaah will ever be to 'Amy' (I still think it was a man-troll). I feel so sorry already for that poor kid-to-be (if she's real) - she is basically being brought into existence to fill all her mother's needs and expectations that she's too useless/thick/mental/inadequate to fill herself. She won't be allowed to exist for herself, she will have to be Mummy's Perfect Little Doll. I already predict eating disorders, self-harm, depression and teen promiscuity.

Whereas your young 'un knows his mummy and daddy's world revolves around him but not in any unhealthy way. And with a working Mum, he won't be the sort of man who has unrealistic and old-fashioned ideas of what his future DW/DP should be (not saying that's the only reason men are sexist, but it doesn't help).

You rock and it's v frustrating when everyone in the world knows it but YOU, stupid head!

mmmmwah. I do love you so.

I know, and my rational brain is secure in all that. I am also super-lucky in that my childminder is also my best friend. And as far as mani is concerned he just has more family than most,cos he has 'mummy n daddy' and 'chart'. He loves her to pieces and she is brilliant.

The upset part is about what I said earlier. I know how lucky I am to have mani, and since it has dawned on me that I may not have another child I just want to make the most of every second and blah blah stuff that I'm not sure is appropriate for this thread as I do not wish to appear a selfish cunt but weirdly this all kicked in exactly a year after the horrible 12 week scan.

And I'm fine,generally...just trying to explain why I got upset.

And the droid is definitely rumbling in. Bastard.

I still don't entirely get it. But she sounds like a class A loon who needs locking up. I'm very intrigued to read Headbanger's responses but they are in the MN Department of Mysteries, it seems.

My mum worked when we were very little. Never did us any harm. We needed the money. So that woman, if she even exists, can fuck right off. She's probably aiming to upset and distress people, and therefore her "opinion" is to be utterly discounted .

Am very sorry if I'm bringing something up which had already been put to bed.

Listen, my Mum went back to work p-t when I was about 18 months and I didn't even know this fact till I was older because all I remember is having wonderful times and exciting adventures with my Grandparents and 'Aunties' and 'Uncles' (ie family friends), which have given me some of my loveliest memories, taught me stuff I wouldn't have learnt otherwise and strengthened my character. It is healthy and right for kiddiwinks to have ample time spent with other people, otherwise the separation caused by school or whatever will freak them out and be v hard on them.

I bet Mani has a wonderful time with his 'Auntie' and really appreciates every second spent with his Mum and Dad. You can't be everything to and for him - that way serial killers are made!

As for having another child, well, it goes without saying everyone here believes in you and wants it to happen (and it WILL). But, if it doesn't, then the pain and grief of that won't be solved by spending more time or 'better' time with Mani; that will be something you (and your Mister) will have to work through regardless of time spent with him. But you know that.

Anyway, no need to worry about that, cos you're gonna WIN I forbid anything less, okay?

Oh gin

On the WOHM/SAHM debate: my mother went back to work when I was 3 months old. I ended up with a fabulous extended family - my former childminder came to my wedding - and never felt that she went back to work because she didn't love me.

My mother is a beautiful, elegant, professional, intelligent, happy woman who loves her family very much. And probably loves us more because she didn't have to stop doing something she loved because I needed her.

Oh, and two of my mates who had kids v early and quit work to be with them have been very shocked to realise that there isn't a hell of a lot to do once your child goes to school and doesn't need you quite so much...

And I can see from your post that you already know this...

Whether you're trying for your first child or your fifth, the feelings that come with it being a struggle are the same. We're equal opportunity BESHes.

Now, can anyone explain why I am wide-awake at 4am? And not in a good drunk-a-vat-of-wine-and-stayed-up-talking-way. No more lovely sleep for me...

perfect no so perfect a time to be up - what gives?

However I too have been awake since 5am fanks to the fella & not in a good way. Can you believe he's 36 years old & was too excited about the football to sleep. Idiot! lyra yes he is (has already) gone to Wembley & I thank Jebus for that coz I don't think I could cope with him today.

gin I really could slap that woman so fucking hard for upsetting you so much. Even though I can't believe she is real. Surely, surely in this day & age such cunts can't exist? I hope you've had a good sleep & have woken up feeling a bit better this morning (in which case I hope you haven't read my post coz don't want to drag up shiz). Everyone else has put far more eloquently that I can what a wonderful parent you are - you only have to see the wonderful pics of Mani to know that he is a bright, happy, muchly loved & very lucky little lad. I have 2 friends who are parents - 1 I intend to copy 100% in parenting skills, the other I will jump off a bridge if I start to copy. You sound exactly like my friend numero uno.

My mum also worked part-time. We needed the cash. It helped pay for little weekend day trips with my family, from a picnic at the beach to days at Alton Towers. These are the memories I have, not my mum heading off to work. Sorry - that sounds really materialistic, I just mean that I remember the fun family stuff not the mundane off to work stuff.

I'm off now before I make more of an arse of myself.

I'd also like to add that I want to be a SAHM myself, but don't agree with that OP in the slightest. And even if we can afford it to work out like that (we don't have lots of cash and things would be seriously tight), I wouldn't spend my every waking moment with our kid(s) once they're past a certain age because it's not healthy for them or for me. One of the reasons I'm doing my journo course is not only because I've wanted to be a journo for so long and never bloody done it, like the twat I am, but because I want to find a job I can do from home so I can have the best of both worlds - work and have my own independence and money, etc., but also be still basically a SAHM.

My Mum became a SAHM after my bro was born, for about 9 years, but she did her degree, did huge amounts of charidee work for Oxfam and was involved in loads of political activism (Greenham Common, etc.), so to me, that was her work and we're both so proud of what she did. When she wasn't involved in stuff, she was a bit depressed and bad-tempered and got far too smothery - because making your life revolve around your kids isn't healthy, as I said. And Gin, your business is a really good one - so creative and groovy and the end products touch people's hearts and bring fun and positive emotions into people's lives and Mani will be SO proud of his parents for that.

Right, pls to be forgetting horrid woman and come here for gropes.

May I bring cheer to the thread in the form of news of my approaching droid? I have spottage which will hopefully turn quickly to full droidage. And once that happens I'm back in the game. Oh yeah.

Well, it's a rare thing for someone here to be celebrating a droid, but I'm reet proper chuffed for ya, aMusementArcade! Fancy a quick tango?