TTC whilst breastfeeding support thread - join me to share your ups and downs!

[smallblackflowers]

Hi!
A little about me - I'm pushing 34, have a 10 month old DD that I'm still breastfeeding and really want to conceive no.2 asap!
I am on my second cycle since AF returned and am temp / CM / CP charting using fertility friend and have OPKs!
I ovulated on day 29 of my last cycle, and am on day 21 at the moment.
Have been having fun and games with very fertile signs over the past week, so lots of BD, but no ovulation, poor DH is full of a cold and not feeling very energetic but I keep insisting that he perform until my temps go up

So anyway - hoping that there are others out there in a similar boat who can help to keep me sane and hopefully share some good news in the coming months.

Hi everyone.

Thought I would post just to keep the thread alive. Are we running out of steam, or are there just too many graduates at the moment?

Hulla I really hope the warning came at the right time for your friend. Presumably some women do not have problems coming off Depo, but the sheer numbers of people complaining on the web must indicate that there's something up. Do people get it from their GPs in the UK? I can imagine it's difficult for them to stay on top of all the latest info about the drugs they prescribe. My OB/GYN here in Germany, however, ought to know these things, so I'm hoping that this new version really is a lot less problematic.

Things are starting to look up at my end, the last lot of spotting developed into a more substantial bleed, meaning that I now have a proper chart on FF (I was previously on CD820 ) Am now seeing an increase in CF so am hoping that I might ovulate, if not within a few days, then maybe after the next patch [hopelessly optimistic emoticon]

Now if I could just remember where I last saw DH...

Silkenladder that's fantastic news! I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you!
Kate I had a couple of repair ops after dd's birth (probably not the same op, I realise) and was surprised at how ok I was physically so soon after the op (if a bit apprehensive - wine helped!) I hope you've, er, had a fun weekend

Ooo, good news Silkenladder :) Certainly can't hurt to try a bit of SWI even if you're not sure :o I think the amount of graduates we've had is why the thread's a bit quiet, I'm currently on 2WW, not much to report other than random symptom spotting which I swore I'd not do this time

Hulla - yes, I had thought I would be better sooner, since when I gave birth I had lochia, lack of sleep, newborn permanently attached and trying to establish breastfeeding going on at the same time! DH and I keep laughing about the consultant, in a 'we've got to have a shag, doctor's orders' kind of way :o

Hi, can I join please?

I have a 2 year old (wow, I can't believe that - her birthday was on Saturday) DD, who just BFs at bedtime, or if she is poorly, or if I can't be bothered to get up on a Saturday morning and would like a lie-in...

AF came back when I went back to work in January, and we have been TTC since the summer with no success yet. I don't know if it is the BFing or not, but it could be one thing standing in the way.

TTC is is bit stressful, isn't it? We were really lucky the first time around, so quick, I just assumed it would be the same this time .

I will go back and read the recent thread posts now, just wanted to say hi first.

Welcome pookamoo and happy belated birthday to your dd

Sorry to hear that you're finding TTC stressful. Hope you find some support and encouragement on here. It seems to be a pretty successful thread so far anyway.

Thanks
I'm wondering whether in fact it's the stressfulness which is affecting the TTC to be honest!

I sobbed my way through the last chapter of "Mothering your Nursing Toddler" this evening, while DH was giving DD her bath, then I was just wondering whether she would actually ask for a BF before bed or if I could "get away" without it tonight; Although I am not sure I want to wean her, I would, if I knew it would increase my chances of getting baby no. 2!
However, once she was pyjama-ed up, sure enough, the happy cry of "buboo time!" was heard and off we went...
Am feeling pretty hormonal at the moment since am on AF (day 3 of cycle today), generally reflective about the passage of time, and just disappointed that things haven't happened yet.
I do appreciate that many people are in a far worse situation re. TTC, but it does feel pretty important to me.

Ah Pookamoo ttc is important & someone else going through a hard time doesn't make your stress or upset any less. You're entitled to be upset by it too. Welcome to the thread! It's a lovely support and not as fast paced as some of the other ttc threads.

So it looks like I've had a missed miscarriage. I had a scan at epu yesterday following some bleeding on Sunday. They couldn't find a heartbeat and I'm measuring at least a week too small.

Got to go back next week to confirm and then I assume some kind of procedure to speed things along.

So whilst I can't think about ttc at the moment I may be back to the thread as s participant and if not, I might still post to chat (I am still bf so I'm halfway there!) xx

Welcome Pookamoo! Agree with Hulla, please don't compare your TTC situation with others, each story is as important as any other and you are definitely entitled to your feelings about it, it is very tough psychologically, especially if you feel like it's your fault (i.e. by bfing, as I'm sure many on this thread can identify with).

Hulla - So so sorry :( Hope you're doing ok and coping well. Please come back to talk to us even if you're not ready to TTC yet. Thinking of you xx

We are currently snowed in, with DH snowed out, thankfully we are on our 2WW, so his involvement is not necessary at this stage in the proceedings I have 2 PTs in stock, so will be able to test next week if no AF and still snowed in...

oh Hulla - I am so so sorry . I am absolutely gutted for you - that is awful. Is it absolutely definite? Just wondering whether it's too early to see heartbeat? If so, I really hope you are being extra kind to yourself and hope you find the support you need in your dc and dh. Thinking of you (((hugs)))

Welcome pookamoo". Hulla* is right - ttc is hugely important for the couple involved and it is so easy to become consumed by it all. Wish you lots of lucj in his rollercoaster of a ride.

Things ok over here. Was my DD's 1st birthday on Sunday so all the party preps, party. family visits definitely kept me busy and helped me forget the mc for a short while whilst i appreciated how lucky i was to have dd. Will start ttc in the new year (can't do before anyway as won't have had my first period by then). But I am nervous about it all the same.

[waves to *silkenladder, LifeofKate and Dita and everyone else]

Thanks Lifeofkate & Mama. The nurse/midwife (not sure what she was) at epu said they have to give it a chance to develop because I'm measuring 6 weeks and she wouldn't necessarily expect a heartbeat at 6 weeks so I'm back next week for another scan.

Every way I look at it though, I can't stretch my ov dates any further. I just can't be 6 weeks. Especially as I got a positive at 9dpo to be 6 weeks it would have had to be 2 dpo and that wouldn't be possible.

How are you now Mama? I am really quite frightened and a but dazed. I know what you mean about appreciating DD even more, I think it has softened the impact of the news. I wish I knew how to feel.

Sorry for the typos!

My post didn't make sense - to be only 6 weeks now it would mean that I got a positive hpt at 2dpo. I'm being realistic. I'm glad I'm sure of my dates, I would hate to have that feeling of realising there was no heartbeat twice. I know on Monday things won't have changed.

Kate good luck for your 2WW! Glad the snow came after the important bit

If you don't mind me posting about loss then I'd like to stick around please x

Yes, I understood from your first post, Hulla, it did make sense. I'm so sorry, mc hasn't happened to me so I can't even pretend to know how you feel, please come and talk to us though if you need to, others may be more help than me, but I am thinking about you and hope you, your DH and DD are ok xx

Hi Hulla. Hope you take care of yourself when waiting for the scan but sounds like you are mentally prepared if the worst happens. I am truly sorry you are going through this. I know what you mean about not knowing how to feel. I am ok thanks. I have my good and my bad days. Feels wierd that I am not pregnant anymore, even if it did happen relatively early. Please do post and stick around. You need lots of hugs in RL too from your dh and dd- how is your dh coping?

Good luck LifeofKate - have fingers and toes crossed for you! And well done for getting hpts in case you are snowed in - lol!

xx

DH is going to call PIL today. Dreading that. I hope she doesn't say I told you so. Then we're going out to get DD's Christmas presents

Have a lovely day both of you x

Mama - they were ones left over from when I got pregnant with DS :o Hmm, suddenly panicking that they will be out of date...

Hulla - sorry, x-posts, I didn't realise until now. Why on earth would MIL say I told you so?!?! Big Big hugs :( xx

Quick question - is 10DPO too late for implantation bleeding? If it isn't that, AF is coming :(

Hulla I'm so so sorry. You're probably right to prepare yourself for the worst. A friend of mine over here in Germany, where we get scanned every couple of weeks in early pregnancy, had a mmc at 10 weeks. It wasn't until we compared notes a couple of years later when I was pregnant with DD that it became clear to me that the dr had seen it at least two weeks earlier but hadn't dropped big enough hints to my friend to prepare her. Please keep posting though. Maybe we should rename the thread "Breastfeeding and dreaming of another baby".

I know I was trying to be charitable about your PIL before, but if they do say I told you so then I think you actually should disown them. At least until after Christmas. ( Kate read back about 5 or 6 pages if you can't remember why)

Also, Kate, I had implantation bleeding with DD at 12 dp-Swi, so probably 10dpo. How is the symptom spotting going? Are you suffering from Dita's favourite - constipation?

It does seem like implantation bleeding (very light and very pink), I'm REALLY REALLY trying not to get my hopes up The one symptom that jumped out at me was that I needed the loo loads, but that has gone away again now, and besides, I know that doesn't happen til a little further along, not at barely implantation!! Thankfully I have no constipation, I guess we can be grateful for small mercies :o

Just read back, how did I miss that?!
Goodness Hulla, what a horrible reaction, I will be angry on your behalf if you get an 'I told you so'

Hulla - how did the shopping for your dd go? I haven't done anything as yet as her birthday was on the weekend - and now starts the christmas shopping for her too! Really hope your parents in law were supportive....

LifeofKate - oooohhhh - sounds promising! I had implantation at around 12 dpo last time too - v light and then it went away the next day. How long is your LP? Must say 10 dpo is a bit early for af to arrive so hoping it's good news for you!!

Hope you're doing well silkenladder - what stage you at in your cycle now?

Well, Mamafoof, this is the trouble, I'm only supposing when I ovulated, so it could well be AF :( CD1 was on 3rd November. I thought I was getting EWCM on 17th Nov so did some BD then, and then thought there was more on 21st Nov, so did some BD then too, to be on the safe side :o The second lot of EWCM was more convincing, IYSWIM, so that's where I have counted from in my DPO calculation. However, if the first lot of EWCM was correct, AF would be due just about now :( I suppose the good thing if this is AF is that my cycle will have been a normal length this cycle (28/29 days)as opposed to the 42 (I think!) days last month

Will be back tomorrow to update on whether it is AF or whether it has gone away again... am I right in thinking that I wouldn't get a BFP just yet if implantation is only just happening?

I thought I was fairly clued up on conception, it seems not

Thank you all for your lovely welcome.

Hulla I'm really sorry to hear your sad news I hope all went ok with telling the family.

I am on day 5 of my cycle now, so hoping to get down to "business" again in the next couple of days. DH has prescribed us both fruit smoothies (yummy!) to make sure our vitamin levels are up. Fingers and toes crossed, here we go!

Two more of my antenatal group have announced over the weekend that they are pg with DC2, and another friend has just had her DC2, on her DD's 7th birthday!!! So babies everywhere at the moment!

We were just going through some photos on the computer, including some of DD as a tiny little one, making DH and I a bit bleary eyed!

Morning everyone! Well DH told his parents and they said...nothing. MIL hasn't even sent me a message. I feel quite hurt but that sounds like they can't win either way, I know.

Shopping for DD was lovely mama! we got her some HappyLand stuff from ELC. It's very plastic which I usually try to avoid but she likes role playing with little dolls at the moment so I hope she'll like it.

DH and I had an odd day though. He said he felt like I'd been distant over the last few weeks and somehow the conversation turned to how well suited we were. I ended up going over all the things that have driven me insane since we got married and just made him feel even worse on a crap day.

We went home and had a lovely dinner with dd and my parents and really enjoyed each others company but I know DH is worried now. It really isnt the right time for talking about ending our marriage but I couldn't stop myself. So I feel like a horrible person today and a bit like I didn't deserve another dc because I had doubts about our relationship.

Kate I think that sounds like implantation! Eek! Fingers crossed, will look out for your update.

pooka I know what you mean, a few of my friends announced pregnancies on FB last night. I'm pleased for them, truly, but I so wish I was able to make the same announcement after Christmas. It also made me wonder if any of my friends had been secretly upset when I announced my pregnancy with dd.

Hugs Hulla. Sweetie, your hormones are all over the place. You are in no position to be talking about big things like that as everything will be coloured by what you are going through and the fact your hormones are crashing through the floor. Sorry your MIL has yet again been such a bitch - you really don't deserve her. But please don't feel like anything you did had any bearing on the outcome of your pregnancy. It's just stupid chance, pure and simple. The next throw of the dice will more than likely be fine. I know that doesn't really help you now. I was where you are now in September and it is horrible but it doesn't mean it will happen again.

I hope you are ok as well, Mamafoof. Been thinking about you both a lot.

How is Dita - she seems to have vanished too

Thanks LadyGG I did say that to DH eventually but I know it was stupid to even have the conversation. How are you doing? Have you had a scan yet?

I have seen Dita on fb, she sounds like she's busy with RL. I'll send her a message and ask her to stop by.

Think we're going out to get my mums birthday present. I hate snow! Hope none of you are too badly affected.