Assisted conception (and the bits in between!) - part 3 - all welcome

[Caitni]

Right ladies, time for a new thread.

And a big welcome to everyone . Here's to many more success stories and healthy pregnancies!

oh islegrin blubber away all you want. your dh wants to do things oficially, wait til the exact date. they are not like us. no patience! I am trying to understand if you said that 2 rounds of ivf costs $60k? i am shocked. You could fly to the UK have 3 rounds and still have $45k left over after expenses. sorry if that is not helpful i am just surprised. you have a lot of decisions to make, and some persuasions too. dh just wants to protect you, bless him.
LL so sorry about your bleeding. these things are so worrying arent they. well they mostly work out just fine, as you already know. i had some light bleeding at about7 or 8 weeks myself, doc panicked for nothing, she turned out just fine. have a rest, take the excuse to be waited on hand and foot. congrats on the lovely scan, so reassuring.
I had my ET today, went fine, transferred 2 good quality embryos. one 6 cells, one 5 cells. did not go to blast stage, transferred on day 2, so pretty good i think, now we wait, wait wait, why are we waiting?

ladies -- sorry not been on here. Work has been horrific and I am kernackered.

I have missed lots of stuff. so will try and do some catch up later.

Lottie take it easy, please, sending you sticky baby dust!

Also on the note of mat clothes. HOw tall are you? - I have some mat clothes that were given to me and are too short. They are size 18 and a regular leg, but they seem to be too short for me. I was given them by my boss. If you want them, let me know and I can send to you.

right I need to go to bed, sleep is required xxx

Hi Lottie - I am the same height as you. I can send and you can ditch or donate if you want?? ---
There are two pairs of jeans from M&S, under bump, The length is fine, if you wore flipflops or flatties, I just don't get on well with under bump mat trousers.

I think there is also a pair of black linen trousers which are fine, but again under bump and from Mamas and papas and for some reason, too big around my ass. haven't put any weight on there this time around. and I am more of an apple shape not a pear shape.

and I think a pair of mamas and papas combaty type jeans from Mama and papas - in regular, which again are fine if wearing flats but again under the bump.

I think there is also a H&M shirt in large, but that doesn't fit me, it is beige/cream.

Also a mama and papa cross over cardigan size 16/18. It is short on me tho/ I have a long body.

There is also a pair of Mothercare black boot cut trousers (can't remember if they are size 18 or 16. And they are long, they are still long when I wear them with boots. And probably good for winter when you get bigger etc. Anyway let me know, if you want them I can post and you can try and if you don't like or they don't fit (don't forget you will get bigger), then you can ditch or donate......

Hi all, good luck to all you on the 2WW. LL hang in there and don't worry too much, a friend of mine had bleeding ALL through her pregnancy. . . . keep your cool, trouble in conceiving does not equal trouble in pregnancy.

Mowmi you are very quiet, I hope all is okay.

I am steeling myself for another cycle starting in about two weeks. I think last time I let my hopes get up to high, mistaking responding to treatment as potential for success, which it obviously is in a way, but not quite as directly as I felt it. . . .

BTW we have had the wettest May on record here, and looking to having the wettest June too. I have to keep going up to my roof top and emptying my pot plant self watering systems (usually v. necessary) in order to stop them from drowning, lap up your sunshine UKers!

Ailz great news on your embryo transfer! Fingers crossed for you over the TWW to testing.

Everything is more expensive here in Hawaii... it's the "price of paradise" Ailz and LL thanks a bunch for your encouragement. Actually, after some thought, it occurred to me that it's OK for me to accomodate some of my DH's preferences, but I should ask him to do the same for me. I did that, and we had a wonderful chat! It went really well, in fact, some of his concerns came out that I was able to ease his mind. Luckily with all that I've learned here - I had a good idea of the process and the typical transfer procedures. I think we're back on track again, and I feel much better about going forward - seems that he's open to even going one round of IVF now!!! However, I'm going to talk to my doc about doing whatever she can for these last two IUI cycles. I'd rather get pg before we have to talk about plan C, D, or E.

Your suspicions were correct, I needed to talk to DH - thanks for the push!

Islegrin glad you had good chat, they are great for putting the mind at rest. our hubbies sometimes think we will break if we get disappointed, but we are tough too. Hope everyone is coping with 2ww and all sorts of other decisions and stages! it is all a bit boring here, just trying to fill in the 2ww without too much thinking... yeah right.

Afternoon ladies

Ailz congrats on your ET! Sounds like you've got two lovely embies on board! Hope you don't go too mad on the two week wait. When have your clinic told you to test?

Lottie so sorry to hear about the bleeding - how scary. Am glad to hear that the twins are still making their presence felt with symtoms a-go-go . Take care of yourself - hope you catch up on sleep soon and that the nausea abates soon...

Flibberty hello . Hope things are good with you. How long do you have left now?

Islegrin sorry to hear you've been feeling low but am glad you and your DH talked things over. Having their support makes this whole thing more bearable. I'd echo what everyone else has said about IVF not being so bad. Especially as you have some experience of the stimming drugs, which I found the strangest phase. Still, we've also alked about adoption (I guess lots of us ttc-ing our first have had that conversation too!). Here's hoping neither of us have to cross that particular bridge .

Sooty that's good you have another cycle starting soon. Best of luck with it .

Big hello to everyone else.

I'm going slowly mad waiting to test . Am now 13 dpt so am due to test tomorrow morning. Am convinced it hasn't worked (self preservation) but yet don't feel like AF is going to arrive (but I imagine the progesterone is holding that at bay - bar the very light spotting I get I never get any pre-AF symptoms anyway so not putting much stock in this). This is by far the most horrible time and now (of course!) I really wish I hadn't told anyone as it's going to be horrible to break bad news to people.

Sorry for being a bit negative - just feeling quite low today and wish I could just click fast forward!

I was going to avoid MN until tomorrow but have no will power! It's good to read of other people's progess though .

For Ailz sorry, meant to say "told you when to test".

xx

Hi everyone, just popping on to apologise for being absent and for being about to be absent again and for writing a me post.

Had scare last week with spotting on Thursday but scan today confirmed all OK. Staff at EPU were horrible but that's a long story for another day concerning NT scans and them not wanting me to have one. Off to Glastonbury tomorrow (despite horrid people saying I shouldn't go because I need to rest - Glastonbury is one of the most restful places I could be but they wouldn't listen).

Lottie - Glad your scare was OK too. They did tell me to expect more spotting as blood tends to hang around the cervix for a while once you've already had some (but only when trying to dissuade me from Glasto - didn't even mention it before - oops ranting again), so try not to worry if you get a bit more.

Hope you're all well and good luck to you all wherever on the rollercoaster you are. I have read all your posts but haven't had chance to respond and need to get ready to go away tomorrow now. Take care everyone xxx.

Issy glad to hear that things are OK with you too and you're totally right to be off to Glasto - sod the EPU staff! Have a fantastic time (I'm so ).

Lottie thanks for your good wishes - you are a treasure! I actually got a lump in my throat reading that as of course it's the dilemma. Bad news is going to be horrible to share but equally, don't really want everyone knowing when I'm five mins pregnant either...been too scared to test so far...when I'm not feeling sick with worry it's quite nice to daydream about being pregnant...since a BFN will take all that away I'm waiting as long as possible before knowing one way or the other.

Hello everyone

Back from an amazingly lovely weekend in York which almost (but not quite) took my mind off the tww.

Islegirl - really sorry that this cycle of IUI didn't work out for you. My heart really went out to you when I read the last line of one of your posts about looking on the bright side. I could almost hear the deep breath in you had to take before mustering the will to say it. So glad your chat with the DH went well. You must feel really relieved now to know that even if you don't want to go there yet, a plan b could be there if you need it.

Lottie - bloody hell. So glad to hear that the babies are still causing you untold grief in the symptom department. That cramping must have been terrifying.

Caitni - have every finger and toe on every hand and foot crossed for you tomorrow. I'm sick with nerves for you so I can't even begin to imagine how you must be feeling. I really know what you mean about holding back on the testing as well. I hardly ever do tests anymore because the maybe/maybe not game is far less painful than the definatley not game. Sending you all the best wishes in the world tomorrow for two bright fat lines. xxx

Ailz - brilliant news about your ET. When is it that you test again? Hope your DD is keeping your mind occupied in the tww.

Issy - glad to hear all is well with you and that your scare came to nothing. Completely agree with you about Glastonbury. What the hell do they think you're planning on doing? Vigorous mud wrestling on Es? My docs at home were completely over the top when I rang them to tell them I was pregnant half way through travelling and they practically became appoplectic (no idea how to spell that) when I told them we were going to South America next. But the specialist in Melbourne just looked at me blankly when I asked for her advice and said "They do have babies in Brazil you know". My first 20 weeks while travelling were the most lovely and relaxing of my pregnancy while the last 20 I spent safely tucked behind the computer in a stuffy office were by far the most fraught with stress and disscomfort. Ignore them and have a lovely time. x

Nothing to report here really. Just waiting and trying (but failing) not to think about the weekend.

Can I ask a question? Have all you IVF ladies had long protocols because I think, because of my PCOS and high AMH count, I'd be put on a short one. I'm a bit confused, if I am short protocol, when the whole process would start within my cycle. I want to give it one last go if this cycle ends up in a BFN and then start an IVF cycle in August if they can fit me in but I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do now.

Hello to everyone else.

LL - will email you tonight or tomorrow. I have the work week from hell, thanks to a load of political fools who are really beginning to do my head in.

issy at you going to Glastonbury, can't think of anywhere more fun. I am thinking of womad this year, we went last year with DD when she was just 1. She LOVED it, so did I. I love festivals so much. Just lots of good human fun!!

caitni - sending you hugs. We are right there with you chick, good or bad, you know you can come here and just "share" with us, because we know the journey too well.

Ailz -- keeping fingers crossed for you too. the 2WW IS vile, it is such a weird thing, you hate it when you are on it, but you also hate it when you come to the end of it cos you are terrified! islegrin - sending you hugs. Am glad you managed to talk to your DH. I know it all seems such a large mountain and made worse when the unspoken builds up between respective partners. MY dh is a closed book when it comes to emotional stuff. He just doesn't deal with stuff until he needs to, where as I wear my heart on my sleeve and it is v annoying. I think it is his way of dealing with disappointment etc. But Grrr nonetheless. For your info. My IVF cost me c ?12k (this was with Egg donation) at a clinic in the Republic of Ireland, who I rate highly. they also have a clinic in barbados www.sims.ie. The team in Ireland is wonderful. And I have managed two successful IVF attempts, resulting in my DD and now this PG. I am sure the donor eggs made a difference, however i will never know, as I lost mine to ovarian cancer. However, in spite of numerous risks during my 20's with my DH, i never once fell pg and was diagnosed with PCOS. So think it would have been the IVF route anyway! don't give up hope, miracles do happen.

Sooty - sending you hugs and good luck for your next Tx

Summermagic - sending you hugs too, as you sound like you need it.

Right I am off to put together a load of nonsense for a presentation to the leadership team tomorrow. OH to just be a painter or something and get out of the corporate crap!

hugs and love to you all xxxxx

Flibberty yes, we are often much different than our male counterparts - but it's wonderful when we can talk to help bridge the gap! That's very helpful info on the cost and possible other locations for IVF... could we really go to Ireland or Barbados just to get pg! HA! I love the sound of that. Just to clarify - when I mentioned 25k-30k in USD, which would be 15-20 GBP approx. Does that make it seem any more reasonable??? not to me really, but I'm a stickler about finances. Sorry to hear about your ov. cancer, but so happy for you that IVF has worked twice! Were they each the first attempt and when are you due?

Summermagic - you are so right about the deep sigh!!! It's tough to pull ourselves up and keep going, but it must be done. The alternative is to wallow for months or years - and that's no way to live. I hope you have plenty of magic!

Issy good to hear from you, and I agree with the others - frag them! Go and have a splendid time, I can't wait to hear all about it!

Ailz TWW for me should really be called 1 week wait, and one week of mad testing!!! My DH doesn't give me a guilt trip though, he usually wants me to test even earlier!!! We can get some test at a reasonable price, so we just do it. For me it's a sign of progress - either one way or the other.

Caitni Best of luck with testing tomorrow, that was originally when I was supposed to test - but see note above... I've been testing since Saturday! But don't worry - I'll test again tomorrow, JUST IN CASE! (I'm in MUCH better spirits about the whole thing now!)

LL you are a buoy! Thanks for all that you do around here to give us perspective and keep us going. May those little ones keep growing big and strong!

Well ladies, I tested this morning, and...it's positive!! I got a BFP .

We're in total shock as I was so braced for a negative result (my DH is now saying he knew all along! Typical man!). So convinced was I that it wouldn't work that we didn't even plan anything for our anniversary so looks like we will be heading out to celebrate tonight

I'm going to arrange a beta with my clinic and start the nerve-wracking wait for the 6 week scan.

Sorry for me, me, post - I'll check in properly later. But I wanted to thank all you ladies for your support and wisdom and humour during all of this. I really think I would have lost it without this thread at times (well...I think I did lose it but I'm finding it again now!).

Now better go and get ready for work!

Thanks Lottie . Patience is not a virtue of mine so reckon this scan wait is going to be looooong....

Hi girls, sorry I have been awol, had to work out a few things for myself and didn't feel in the right frame of mind to post but have been lurking to follow everyone's progress. I'll do a longer post for you all later on but just had to check in to congratulate Caitni! That's absolutely fantastic news!! I'm sure you're gonna have the best anniversary celebration ever!

HOORAY HOORAY HOORAY. Caitni that is such fantastic news. Congratulations. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

What a wonderful anniversary present. I'm so so so so so so delighted for you. xx

OH MY GOD CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HURRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY i did not read anything past your thread yesterday, just quickly scrolled down to todays one, because i just knew you would say bfp!!!! oh my god you must be over the moon to say the least, what a day! enjoy your celebration.
it makes me feel a bit more positive, because i feel a bit like you were feeling. looking out for af symptoms already. i know i shouldnt. testing 4 July.
Do you have any symptoms at all yet?

I have missed so much in one day! i am going to reply to everyone one by one i think!
Thanks Flibbertywidget i am trying to keep occupied. my dd has a new ballet outfit for a class and wants to wear it in the garden with wellies. it looks way too flimsy for that, so yes she keeps me occupied! could you tell me the name of the clinic in the republic of ireland if you dont mind. my cousin lives in Galway and has had three failed ivf attempts. i dont know which clinic she used, as i dont ask too many questions. i would like to be able to recommend one to her. she was treated badly at her clinic and is very down. has been ttc for over 10 years at least. she may try egg donation.
Summermagic i am no ivf expert as i have found out. but i believe i am on short protocol. i never even heard of it until recently. took meds on day 2 of cycle for 10 days, scan, EC and ET and 2ww. sounds awfully easy doesnt it? hope someone else can help you more.