Assisted conception (and the bits in between!) - part 3 - all welcome

[Caitni]

Right ladies, time for a new thread.

And a big welcome to everyone . Here's to many more success stories and healthy pregnancies!

hi all, just wondering if 16.3 for progesterone is good in a non-pregnant but trying to conceive woman?! my doc's notes next to my blood test say 'everything fine, no action.' am i normal?! This will be my 8th cycle of trying! DH going for some tests too. help!

Morning ladies

Mickbell If you're in the UK then I think they tend to look for a progesterone result of at least 30 nmol/l to indicate ovulation (although according to my doctor anything above about 27 nmol/l is fine). If you're in the US (or any country that uses an ng/ml measurement) then anything over 10 ng/ml is fine.

Roseca hoping you get good news at the hospital today - am thinking of you and keeping my fingers crossed xx

Ness also hope you get good news about your follicles today as well.

Bluebell good luck for EC - hope they get a good haul of eggs and you recover well. Time to put your feet up until ET

OAP congrats on your two lovely embies . I'm glad it went well for you and I hope you get the result you deserve at the end of the TWW . I hope the second HCG shot does its stuff for luteal support. And it's lovely to hear of you taking the later apps during treatment - you keep on polishing that halo!

Flibberty glad you're feeling better though it must have been worrying when you thought you were going into labour . I know it's not long now but I hope the little baba stays put for a good while yet

Bumpless sorry to hear that AF rocked up in the midst of a work trip (typical!) but glad to hear that you've now officially started. This new protocol sounds excellent (though I was at you waiting for the kitchen sink) and I really hope you grow lots of lovely follicles [eggy vibes to you m'dear]

Islegrin I'm so sorry that this wasn't your month but well done on making the momentous switch from IUI to IVF . You have such a great attitude and your relationship with your DH is so strong (and your doc sounds like she knows what she's doing) that I think this is a good step for you. It's a huge decision to make, but you've not rushed into anything. I found the mental aspects of it are harder than anything, so it's only natural that it's dominating your thoughts at the moment. I was obsessed with it in the months leading up to our treatment (and still am to an extent - everyone we've told knows we've conceived through IVF and I'm proud to tell them...which is a far cry from the days when I'd cry about not being able to have a family as easily as all my siblings and friends!). I'm not sure if you'd consider anything like acupuncture, acupressure or reflexology but I really found that acupuncture helped me with the mental aspects of it. Oh and isn't it strange to be on birth control again - I found that a real head wreck initially but also quite liked how it made me and my DH's sex life "normal" again ifykwim. And well done on the weightloss - I'm as I comfort ate through a lot of the pre-IVF build-up and during treatment so managed to get pregnant at the heaviest I've been in ages. At nearly 9 weeks I'm now feeling fat all over (seriously, fat arms, fat face, fat ass, fat knees...the works)...you'll be glad you lost a few pounds now when you're at the same stage!

AIlz and Lottie and Sootie and NPA and Duplo and everyone I've not mentioned by name - hope you're all doing well

Not much going on with me, bar the overall fatness and evening nausea (evening sickness?). Thank god for cheddar on wholewheat crackers as it's the only thing I can stomach between 7pm-11pm lately. Nine weeks tomorrow and four long weeks before my NHS scan. Work has been very busy, which is at least helping the days to pass.

Roseca sending you good vibes and hugs, it is not over yet. dont want to get into all our theories on spotting at this stage, with one day to go to PT. There is not point, you now have to be brave. all i will say is when it was my ivf and someone elses on here, forget who, it was all over days before the pt, got very dark bleeding on about day 11 or 12 post ET, so dont lose hope, but i understand the need to protect your feelings from the pain and possible disappointment. i REALLY DO. we all do. Get through the day, by extreme distraction, nearly there.
Thanks for the recipe, will let you know the result!
Islegrin sorry about nasty witch AF, but congrats on new plans being made. Funny that she was not a nasty witch when we were 20 and desperate not to be pregnant! she was an angel of mercy back then! the irony is just not funny actually. welcome to the ivf gang, a jolly lot we are, maybe not, we have our moments. you have a lot of options left, dont think otherwise. it is really not that bad (ivf) once you get into it.
flibberty i am laughing and i shouldnt, at the a&e dash! oh lord, it is like the stories of the men who rush to hospital thinking they are having a heart attack but really it is wind! oh never mind, at least contractions have stopped, every day is a day closer to D-day. very exciting. are you all ready otherwise? i know a woman who worked with me, baby due in 5 weeks,worked in a school, went home for christmas hols and went into labour straight away! had baby christmas day. literally had nothing prepared, was waiting for maternity leave. she had to send her dh out to buy everything for baby. Imagine! I would rather die than send dh out to buy everything for baby. he would come back with the strangest things, and say 'i thought you said this' and things like that. anyway i did not make that mistake when it was my turn, well prepared like the boy scouts i was! hang in there!

Ailz thank you so much for your very very useful advice. Am now resting on sofa with hot water bottle - dh gone to supermarche for some nice hot food
well EC went ok, drugs were nice and I slept through the whole thing then got to relax for a while after. They were a bit surprised cos out of all those follicles there were only 3 eggs, they did say they looked in all of them! Couldnt help overhearing lady in next bed had got 5 still as LL said as long as youre producing eggs youre in with a chance. So now its a wait for call tomorrow to let us know if any of them are fertilised. Off to bed now for a lie down. Thanks again for all your words of wisdom, dont think I coulda done all this without you lot.

Bumpless i am horrified at the raw pastry thing! i do not get it! i am sure it wont kill you though, carry on mad girl.
islegrin congrats on weight loss, that is something to cheer anyone up! it is the best isnt it!
Onlyaphase have you had the pains since day or two after EC? (avert eyes anyone who has not had, or is waiting to start EC) because if you have then it is probably all the needles that have been stuck into your ovaries over and over again and the pain comes a couple of days later, because pain killers stop working. i was in agony for a week i would say, particularly when i sat on the toilet for some reason. your body needs to heal. i also think you are right about the tense muscles during ET, god i was rigid as a board because of extreme need to pee, i literally could not look at the screen as i was afraid i would relax and pee everywhere! that would give you some all over body pain too! as for the 2ww, sorry but that is just a hell made for ladies like us, good luck with it, dont drive yourself mad!

Sorry for loads of posts, but slowly reading through about 3 pages of info and replying as i go! Bluebell good luck today! thinking of you x
Roseca thinking of you today too x
Ness special thoughts going to you too! x
CAitni 9 weeks! that is great, never mind the fat thing, there will come a day when you can work on that, when you have 2 kids to run around after! i too had the evening sickness. i would be fine at work, and as soon as i turned the key in the door the nausea would just well-up, it was as predictable as that. hugs to you. work was my saviour too.
that is great bluebell i am delighted i was able to help. you need to heal now as much as you can before ET, keep warm and snug. dont think about other peoples eggs, it means nothing, all you need is one or two to fertilise, the others are superfluous to requirements! sleep now.

Hi all cheers for your encouragement today went from bad to worse, got to the clinic at 8am and they couldnt draw any blood my veins were too thin (probably because i was cold) after 3 attempts they suggested that i would have to go down to the main hospital for blood tests but would have to wait until 9am so we went for breakfast and then waited half hour for blood test, managed to get some and then went home. Got the phone call this lunchtime and unfortunatley no BFP for me it was negative, the nurse was quite sweet about it and told me to stop taking the cyclogest and AF would be heavier and the next step is a follow up appointment with the consultant in a couple of months, i couldnt help but tear a little bit. DH was brilliant i asked him to let his parents know so that i didnt have to have a conversation with all and sundry while i phoned my mum who as expected was upset but told me not to worry (which is easier said than done) even though i had a gut feeling that today was going to bring bad news it still knocks you for six when someone else confirms it but hey shit happens for a reason dont it, am going back to work tomorrow and see how it goes i think the hardest thing will be sitting in the same office with another girl who is halfway through her second pregnancy i know this sounds bitter but i cant help feeling that she got Preggers on purpose cause i remember her saying not long ago that they didnt want another one but there you go its just me probably being cynical (jealousy rears its ugly head) good luck to everyone else though

Huge Hugs (((Roseca))) and here is a punching bag, two boxes of tissues, a comfy chair, and about 10 pairs of ears to listen and empathize! Oh, and not to worry we also have an assortment of goodies, chocolates, wine, anything to soothe your aching heart.

Use at will - we're all here for you!

(more personals later... gotta run )

oh (((((roseca))))) Im so sorry to hear your news.

Your colleague sounds annoying, and like someone who has no appreciation of what she has and no comprehension of what your situation is.... grrrrr that its not that easy for all of us.

Take care of yourself over next few days, sounds like your dh will, he sounds great, really supportive. xxx

thank you very much islegrin and bluebell your sympathy is much appreciated think i will pop open the bottle of rose wine now who cares if i have a hangover in the morning will give me something else to think about

annoying isnt the word that i would use but to extreme to say on here what i am really thinking but i got you all to count on as well as DH so thats all that matters

So sorry Roseca. Big hug for you. Enjoy the rose. You definately deserve it. I think some chocolate would help too!

Shame about your work colleague. It must be hard to work alongside someone who is preggers right now. Some people don't really think about what they say do they? There are quite a few people in my life who keep hinting at what we are going to use our spare room for, and one who went as far as to say "Well, any news? Any little 'gingerwines' on the way?" When I laughed it off and said no, she suggested I was being selfish as surely DH would like to be a father! GRRRRR!!

All I can suggest is to grin and bear it. Perhaps her eldest child will be going through the terrible twos when the second arrives, or having trouble potty training. It's a bit mean but it might make you feel a bit better!

Bluebell6 - Glad all went well. Fingers crossed for good news tomorrow.

Bumpless - I like raw pastry too!

Nothing much happening here. My DSs are away with my ExH for the week and DH and I are missing them loads. I have spent the day decorating their new rooms for when they return.

Our first appointment at fertility clinic is on Thurs, so I'm just keeping busy til then.

Hi to everyone else. Hope you all ok.

cheers gingerwine though to be honest not really a chocolate lover although a few ferrero rocher wouldnt go amiss with regards to work colleague honestly a couple of times i have had to walk out of room when she goes on a mission about her child grrrrrrrrr. i know what you mean though about people being ignorant about what they say, not anyone on here as everyone is understanding you made me smile though at the thought of terrible two's

So sorry to hear about your bad day roseca , I hope the rose has been going down well, and take some time to be as maudlin as you want, and don't worry at feeling antagonistic towards your workmate either! We've all been there, I'd put money on it. Good luck for your follow up appointment.

Caitni, lovely to hear from you, and glad that all is coming along nicely! I also agree totally with what you were saying to Islegrin about the step into IVF being a real mental issue more than physical. I feel so much more relaxed going into cycle 2 now I know what to expect and how it all works. Like you I also found it an absolute blessing in terms of our sex life becoming "fun" again too, rather than the stressful treadmill that it had become in the months (years!!) beforehand . So good luck Islegrin and come and ask here if you need to set your mind at rest about anything!

I hope the first few days of your 2WW are going well, OAP and Bluebell! Sending all sorts of good wishes to you!

Flibberty, that's an excellent story about your Heartburn emergency . Nice to know that your colleagues are concerned about you though, and that everything was alright in the end!

Bumpless good luck for the start of this cycle, I hope it goes well!

Good luck for Thursday gingerwine. I got quite used to rolling my eyes at insensitive questions, coupled with a "Don't you start too!" in an amused tone of voice and a big smile, and it normally stopped them in their tracks. Well, mostly - there are some oblivious people out there!

Lovely to hear from you LL! I wanted to ask if you could post the details (or cryptically hint?) of your acupuncturist Ian? I am keen to try acupuncture again, and while the practitioner I used last time was perfectly nice we didn't really gel, and she also charges an absolute fortune so I am thinking of trying someone else, and know he comes recommended.

Hi to Ailz, Duplo, newbies on the thread, and anyone else I've missed!

Sorry to hear your bad news Roseca. The first few days are the worst. Is this your first cycle? If it is don't despair, it really is a three to four cycle treatment.

Aliz you must be disappointed. The same thing happened to me last time - I had four to six big follicles and only got two eggs. I had been so excited about producing more than two follicles for once - but my mingy body had other ideas. However, both eggs fertilised and went on to 8 cell grade 1's, so by the time we put them back there wasn't much difference as if we'd had more to choose from. Dr Nargund at Create has a theory that there are really only one or two good eggs each cycle and your body chooses them - so it's not always an advantage to have more eggs. Having said that I'm not pregnant (but still trying). Anyway thinking of you, I know how disapointing it can be.

I had my sleepless night last night - key sign before AF arrives. Not that I have been holding out much hope since we converted to IUI. I am expecting AF to arrive now tommorrow or thursday. Tommorrow would be good (not) as it is my first day of teaching . . maybe the new stress will hold it off . . .

Roseca so sorry. i do know how you feel, a lot of us do, you are not alone. i COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND the jealousy. it is the worst thing ever, all the pregnant ladies everywhere. i had a person discussing (with me!) when to have her third and that she would love a girl, and choosing baby clothes from a catalogue, when she knew my situation very well. so you can feel like the world is against you for a while, it is totally normal. but the world is not against you, it just seems that way. i also warn you that i have seen a pattern on this thread and it is this: acceptance, calm and then completely flying off the handle and spiralling into depression, but you come out the other side in a day or so, so be warned that you are normal and a good day will come much quicker than you think. big hugs. we will help as best we can x
oh gingerwine i am livid that someone would say that to you about your dh wanting to be a father! i am horrified, how did you not explode? you are obviously a very calm person! people are so ignorant of real life! wouldnt it be fun, just for a second, to be really honest and tell the person the truth just to see their face drop in Shame!
thanks sooty yes it is disappointing as it doesnt seem to matter how well the cycle went in terms of follicles, eggs fertilised etc. it is up to nature at the end of the day. hoping af stays away for you and everyone!

Roseca so sorry to hear about the BFN - give yourself the time you need to grieve before looking to your next step ((hugs))

NPA I second Lottie's recommendation of Ian - I found him brilliant through my treatment - very flexible & accomodating about appointments (to the point of doing the pre & post ET sessions at his house as my clinic wouldn't let us use a room and it was a sunday). He's very experienced and is also the cheapest acupuncturist I've ever been to (which certainly helps when you're in the midst of the money pit that is private fertility treatment).

Bluebell it's natural to be a bit disappointed with 3 eggs, but the mantra is "quality, not quantity". It only takes one good quality embryo to work. Fingers crossed you get good news from the embryologist today - it's nerve wracking waiting for that phone call.

Sooty hope the sleepless night doesn't mean what you think it means.

Lottie glad you're on holiday, but sorry to hear the other couple are on the rocks. It must be stressful for you and your DH, but also a reminder how lucky you are to be a strong couple. That's one thing about coping with infertility...it's makes our relationships stronger. Glad you're feeling no more nausea - the second trimester sounds like more fun than the first!

Hello to everyone I've not named

Hi everyone
Embryologist called, we have one fertilised from our 3 collected, no idea of grade yet. Should be feeling happy but am not, am really low today, hormonal crash I guess now am worrying about our little embie, hoping it survives .. we are booked for ET thurs.
Hope you are all having a better day than I am, dont even have any chocolate in the house and builders next door are keeping ds awake, listen to me, moan moan.. promise my next post will be more positive

Hi Girls
I need advice. So I started clomid July 14th. I didn't wait for my period to start because I never get my periods. They are very random, and my Dr told me not to wait, just to start.
So I took the 5 pills 50mg. DH and I went to work for a week straight, and today July 28th AF arrived. Last night when DH and I were bding it was a bit painful, and now today here is AF in all her fury.
I can't get into my gyno until August 17th and really don't want to waste a month if I don't have to. So I'm wondering what you ladies would do if you were me......should I begin a second dose of clomid for the next 5 days. And if so what days of your period do you start taking it. (having never started the first round on my cycle I don't know what days to take it)Sorry for the novel, but I know you ladies have been through it ALL, and may be able to offer me some advice
hugs to all xoxoxox

wishinanhopin sorry dont know too much about Clomid but am sure someone will be along later who will be able to offer you sound advice.

Just a quick question: is it normal to suffer side effects from cylogest pessaries? tmi alert... as well as being low and angry today have v upset tum and bum! is this normal reaction?
x

Bluebell sorry to hear you're low and angry - it's only natural after the rollercoaster you've been one - but I think it's a good sign that you're booked in for ET on Thurs - day 3 - as if your embryologist was worried then they'd take you in for a day 2 transfer. I'm rooting for your embryo to stay dividing well so that it can take it's rightful place in your womb on Thursday...re the cyclogest, progesterone relaxes muscles so for some women this means constipation, as the gut slows right down. But for others, the guts speeds up so it sounds like that's what's happening to you. It should ease off once your body starts to adjust but if you're worried then give the nurse at your clinic a call.

Wishin have no idea about Clomid - sorry. Perhaps you can get better advice from one of the Clomid threads?

How are you feeling, roseca? I hope you're doing okay.

And sending best wishes for your embryo, bluebell, and your upcoming EC.

Thanks so much for the details LL and the good reviews from you and Caitni. I had thought he practiced from London Bridge, but clearly not, though Harley Street is do-able for me, I'll give hm a call tomorrow and see what kind of times he might have. And cheap would definitely be a welcome change!

I hope the holiday improves too, LL. I had a fairly stressful week in France last month with my mother and DH and it's a bummer to not be able to enjoy your holiday. It must be horrible for the warring couple too

hello ladies!

Caitni how lovely to hear from you. Don't think fat - think glowing (ducks behind desk to avoid flung cushion) sorry, people dismissing you feeling bad are deeply unhelpful, I know, but you do have the world's best reason to carry a little extra. And if you read the fantastic Vicky Iovine's Best Friend book (I pre-empted things by reading it before I got pregnant, maybe jinxed myself) all the best people put on weight immediately they get the BFP, well before bumps and eating for two... hope the evening sickness wears off soon.

Gingerwine (fellow raw pastry lover) re the appointments and work thing, I find it one of the worst aspects of this. My job is away from London where my clinic is, and involves quite a lot of travelling and unmovable appointments, so fitting everything in is a nightmare and can get quite stressful. We got through the first cycle on unexplained headaches and missed train excuses, but for the second I've had to tell my PA and boss what I'm doing, who have both been supportive, and I'm about to also have to tell another colleague as I'm bailing out of a 2 day meeting with him to get to a scan on Thursday. It's such personal stuff you don't really want to have it out at work, but eventually it's that or tell massive clunking lies, which I'm crap at! So if you have the option of doing one cycle without having to fit round work I'd recommend it, but obviously putting your life on hold to try to get preggers is very stressful too - maybe you could find something part time? Meanwhile, here's some brasso for OAP 's halo, thank you thank you and all who get late appointments like you!

OAP I do sympathise about the yawning desert of the 2WW! Have you tried the Zita West relaxation CD? I found it very helpful for a daily listen and refocus.

Flibberty I can't believe your double scare week - first false labour (not funny) nd then swine flu (pretty funny although maybe more so from here!)

Islegrin well done you for losing weight! Supposed to help with fertility too, so I'm also trying it - have lost around 2.5kg (@5 lb I think, I'm a metric child) but it's slooooow going! You're right that IVF is a big mental step - and it can also feel very scary cos we can paint ourselves into the 'this is my last chance' corner - but you sound very level and able to talk yourself out of the real emotional cul-de-sacs, so I'm sure you'll adjust really well. Unlike, one could say, moi.

Bluebell , I hope you're feeling OK. It's natural to feel unbelievably anxious for your little minibluebell, but I'm sure your good vibes are hitting the spot. I had unbelievable cyclogest side effects: lethargic, constipated, flatulent, flushes, the lot - they add insult to the 2WW injury!

Roseca so very sorry about the BFN. We've all been there and know how little there is to say that will really cheer you up... but it will get better, I promise, and meanwhile we're all here...

Although, not to get too Pollyanna-ish, re what you and Ailz were saying about insensitive people talking babies to us - I do wonder whether there is sometimes an alternative explanation, that people knowing you're having a hard time don't want to make things worse by excluding us from their normal lives and children. I don't know what would be worst -to have friends not share their children with us, and then we'd feel like real lepers, or to have the sharing foisted on us when it feels like we're being skinned alive... They don't know what it's like in our head, so they sometimes guess wrong, I think, even with the best intentions. Although NOTHING can excuse Gingerwine 's pal saying she's selfish for not wanting kids!!!

Sooty I do hope the witch holds off ...

LL what a shame about the couple you're on holiday with. Are they really about to split up? Do they realise what it's like for you - or is that a no-go zone? Hope you get a bit of a relaxing time, anyway!

Wishin' , I think I started Clomid on day 2 of the cycle and took it to day 6, but I really would get medical advice, even if just over the phone, which some doctors will do for short notice things like this, before taking it.

Have a tummy like a dartboard, 3 injections every night and the heparin comes in a syringe with a blunt needle, which, together with it's anticoagulant properties gives me lovely dotty little bruises like freckles - I'm going to be a vision of loveliness by the end of this. Still, nicer to be doing it than not!

Waves to everyone