Feisty & Fabulous at 40+ - the continuing adventures of TTC

[fruitbowl]

Erm hope this will do as a continuation thread. Hello to anyone new to the thread. All welcome... xx

Grownupbabes - Real practictioners of chinese medicine can be hard to find. But I got converted to believing in alternative medicine when on holiday in Korea once. I had slept on a floor and my back (previous slipped disc) went into spasm and was very painful, I could barely move. So my dh took me to a recommended acupuncturist. I spoke no korean, the acupucturist spoke no English, so communication was limited to a little sign language, ie me pointing to my back and the acupuncturist pointing for me to lay down on the bed, he stuck some needles into me for about a minute then waved for me to leave!!!!!! I thought what a load of rubbish, waste of time. But I was shocked that following 24hours of agony, after walking a few hundred metres, I realised the pain had gone, my muscles were no longer in spasm. I was . It was unbelievable. And I had no further problems despite that afternoon walking all around the town shopping! In this country I am expected to take painkillers and see a physiotherapist, and they have never achieved what one man did in 60 seconds! So I hope that your chinese medicine works for you.

TCM is legit, they use it for their main medicine in china. It's just so different form our experience.

The 2 practioners were just a bit intense that's all!

Day two with my spanking new Clearblue fertility monitor; keep checking it although it'll be at least six days till it wants me to pee on a stick. Just hope I can persuade DH to bonk me on the right days!!

Wow, we are all on here early today, particularly impressed with you Fifi 7:24, remarkable!
That is a great anecdote about the Korean practitioner Rainbow, I am becoming more and more interested.
PS I don't think it works unless you pee on it, but there's no harm in checking, just in case.

hi everyone - just checking in to let those of you who remember me know how i'm going...last eight weeks have been SO long and I can't believe how sick and tired i've been, but it seems to be going ok....we had both an 8 week scan and a 12 week one yesterday - saw and heard the hearbeat, though the scan picture was rubbish as the kid wouldnt stop kicking.....the downs risk also went from 1 in 59 (for a 41yr old) to 1 in 1117 which was such a relief......bit of a concern that the baby measures at almost a week older than it is possible to be....could i have made it fat already?...otherwise i am actually starting to believe that it's real and that we have got through the first 12 weeks ok....though it doesn't stop you worrying

so much has been going on and I am so sorry to hear about the lost little beans...i hope everyone in that situation is doing ok...i had a mc at six weeks last time and got pregnant again on the 4th month of trying after, so i wish the same for all of you.

keep smiling and good luck.....xx

Did you have a nuchal then latestarter?

Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy x

thanks fifi...yes had the nuchal scan and the blood test which they combine to give a fairly good downs risk rating

Hi All

I'm 40 in a couple of months so hopefully you won't kick me off this thread for joining two months prematurely

I have an 8mth old DS (PFB) and due to my advancing years we are already trying to conceive again. Had first post baby period last month but haven't ovulated, so it's early days. Needed IUI last time even though no identified issues so fear I could be here for the long haul...

Good luck everyone

Back on the TCM theme, I am getting really excited about this.
I know you can just buy the herbs/pills eg dong quai but I think the real practioners say that the herb must be exactly tailored to the individual's deficiencies. Get hold of a copy of The Infertility Cure (about £13 off Amazon). I'd never heard of this book till Angifi mentioned it a week or so ago, but I got it and read it and it made a lot of sense. I did the questionnaires in it, and it tallied exactly with my problems. So, by corollary, maybe the remedy will also be just what I need.
Anyway, I am going to this really serious clinic in London (not one of the Doctor and Herbs places that are on quite a lot of High Streets). One hour consultation plus prescriptions etc. Will keep you posted after my appointment on Monday, but I am feeling really hopeful.

Ohh, so glad to hear you talking about TCM.I think it is wonderful. My Dh had a vasectomy reversal after 6 years with vas, and with my AMA(Advanced maternal age) the urologist who did the reversal suggested we go straight to ivf. My hubby wouldn't go near ivf, so I did lots of research and found the "infertility Cure" so inspiring and went straight to an acupuncturist.

What I loved about it was that it helped all sorts of issues, I was more relaxed, it stopped my painful periods, I just felt better overall.

Also, she prescribed different herbs, depending on what she felt the issue was at that time. And she prescribed herbs for my dh, which I really think helped his sperm count.

I hope you also get to experience the benefits of TCM.

I think I have read that book about four times, it is just great.

Hello you lot - newbies and regulars! No news. Just popped in to say hi to y'all. Congrats to those ladies with bubbas in tummies and shed loads of luck to us all trying to get there. TCM talk sounds interesting. I'm still doing fortnightly acupuncture which is doing good I hope.

Hope you all enjoying sunshine?

xx

It was gorgeous yesterday for ds's birthday picnic (result of a combination of prayer and naked wicca dancing) and we missed that lightning storm by one hour. Now we're heading out to a street party and it's raining - not sure how that's going to go. Hope the rest of you are having some sunshine to enjoy.

We're off on holiday next Saturday, which is when AF is due. We've decided we'll be delighted if I'm pregnant, but if I'm not, at least I'll be able to have a few drinks and eat raw seafood. Gotta see the silver lining.

Any news from anyone else?

Fruuuuuiit!! [slaps Fruit on back] Lovely to 'see' you.
Is the acupuncture very 'spensive? I want to try it this IVF for a bit, but this is our second go and we're a bit brassic.
How long do the sessions last?
I think I saw something about needles in the tummy - mine is too tubby.

Grrr at the sunshine, we have a big cloud overhead and it has been here since Saturday, plus some light drizzly rain, so not much naked voodoo up here.

Where are you going on hollies?

News, hmm! Well, I just received a colossal bill from our local clinic, so when I came round I quickly popped it back in the envelope and hid it.
Did I say I had my AMH back?? It was 5.9. Don't know what that means, but apparently it's alright for IVF.
I have started taking DHEA, because I was concerned that twenty tablets and capsules a day wasn't enough. It has been a week and I have spots on my jawline, which are like acne. There aren't that many, but they make up for quantity in their hooogeness.

Hello Rowing. We're off to Cyprus - can't wait. Street party was blessedly rain-free, and there was a pearly king, who handed out song sheets and got everyone singing 'Daisy, Daisy, give me an answer, do' and suchlike. DS got his face painted as a tiger, which he adored, but the performance we had when washing it off just before bedtime made my ears curdle!

What's AMH? Am woefully ignorant about such things. Also interested in the acupuncture, so am keeping a beady eye on all reports.

Hi All

Really interesting thread about TCM and acupuncture - would love to try acupuncture as have read really good things about it - incuding a scientific paper showing that it has positive effects on conception during IVF.

Not been on for ages because i never have any time at the mo', but trying to keep up with everyone's news. I don't have any news because my gynae can't figure out what my cycle's doing! ....there's something not right with ovulation - hormone's a bit wonky maybe, she still hasn't figured it out....and time passes...

This month we're waiting till my follicle's the right size (probably tomorrow) then i'm going to have an injection of Gonasi to make me ov 36 hours later. Has anyone else tried this? It sounds great because you can time the deed (hopefully...there always seem to be obstacles). i'm really lucky because my gynae is an old friend and she's doing lots of internal scans before ov to see what's going on ....otherwise i don't know how on earth we would ever figure out what the "problem" is.There seem to be so many stages in conception where something can go wrong...

Have a good monday everyone!

tt x

Tetley! how lovely to see you - it's been ages. Really interesting to hear about the Gonasi etc - all new to me. Nice to have someone there to give you the inside story - ho ho ho. (Sorry, couldn't resist.) Good luck with it all.

Hi all - no news and not really on topic but were away at the weekend catching up with friends. One of them has had a turbulent marriage, his DW was desperate for a child whilst he was against it especially as it would mean taking a lot of risks with her own health problems.

Anyway after much persuasion they had a DS (now 3) who is autistic and they are in a pretty rocky position as they have been given notice to quit the house that goes with his job, and numerous other issues. He thought they were getting on better than they had been for a while only for her to turn round last week and announce that she'd removed her coil 18mths ago and is now pg. The poor guy looks like he's had his whole lifeforce drained from him.

He'd made it clear that he didn't want more children given the challenges of looking after DS, her health issues and the stress he was under (she doesn't work) trying to keep them afloat and keeping a roof over their heads. He says his trust in her has been completely shattered by her failing to tell him about ttc.

She's always on at me to have another child and had said on one occasion - don't bother asking DH about it, just have an "accident". I always mumble something non-commital as I don't like discussing ttc in RL. DH and I did discuss whether or not we ought to mention the conversation to our friend but thought it wasn't our place to interfere. Now though you wonder whether that was the right decision

Hi Kiwi! Thanks for nice welcome back!

Have a lovely time in Cyprus...i've never been but i reckon the food'll be great...and if you're lucky you'll get the week of heatwave in the uk before heading off

Spiral - you did the right thing by keeping out of it IMO. It sounds horrendous. I know she was desperate for another (we can all understand that!) but I can totally see why he feels he can no longer trust her. What a horrible situation.

Hopefully when the baby arrives it will heal the wounds as it were.

Hello Fifi, Spiral and everyone. Spiral, your friend's marriage sounds really tricky and it could all so easily blow up in your face if you got involved - don't envy you being in the middle of that one.

I feel like I haven't caught up with anyone for ages. Where have you all been, what have you been doing? Has everyone been away, or just out enjoying the summer evenings?

Hi everyone
Well here I am back from my (v expensive) Harley Street chinese medicine consultation, so I thought I'd give you the (free!) lowdown.
I saw Professor Li, apparently the world expert on acupunture and chinese medicine - wrote the seminal text accepted by the World Health Organisation as THE textbook for these matters.
So apparently the key is 1) have you had any live births (yes!) 2) are you under 49 (yes!!) and 3) are you showing any signs of menopause (no!!!). OK Baby!!
Proof of the pudding is 1) you can conceive and 2) chinese medicine considers the drop off period is at 49 when we have lived through 7 x 7 yr cycles of change and 3) if no signs of menopause,then no reason why you are not yet still fertile.
So what is the problem then professor? Spent an hour discussing history, symptoms and various test results. Took my pulse for a long time on both wrists, and checked my tongue. More questions. End diagnosis: Qi (=chi) deficiency of spleen and kidney, in my case. Pointer symptoms were odd things, like recurrent chest infection and feeling of coldness.
So prescription was for a herbal decoction (tea) to be taken in a specific way for a specific time; uniquely tailored to my "deficiencies".
I was warned repeatedly it would be the WORST thing I had ever tasted and that it would require courage and strength to do it. Hah! Courage and strength re TTC already proven, I think.
Also apparently recent miscarriage requires a recover period of months. This I didn't know. He didn't want me TTC for this period of time. Not happy about that, as obviously always feel time is running out. So we will see...
Anyway the herbs arrive by post on Wednesday and then the unspeakably vile drinking of tea begins.
All this cost £286. I asked about vitamins, Q10, DHEA, no wine, no caffeine - all the usual stuff. He said, forget all that, have a glass of wine, drink the tea.
Apparently, the herbs are stronger than the acupuncture and cheaper because you only need to visit once a month instead of every week. So the advice was go for the herbs, we are not interested in taking money from you for the sake of it.
Will keep you informed come Wednesday when I get to taste the medicine!!!

Fascinating! And definitely expensive. But I'm intrigued. How long did he say you had to wait for until you could ttc again? Looking forward to hearing all about it. And if it works for you, then I'll be pushing £286 into his hot little hands myself!

Hi Tetley, good to hear from you again. It's a bummer about the ovulation problems, but great news that you have such a supportive friend who sounds extremely helpful. Good luck with the shot and don't get into a fight 35 hours before the bding begins.

Spiral that sounds like a nightmare for the poor bloke. Of course he is just going to have to shoulder the burden, but it's so unfair of his wife to treat him that way.
I don't think there is much to be gained in involving yourself other than as supportive friends. She announced she had removed her coil after she was pg, don't think her DH has to be Sherlock Holmes to spot an underhand approach to TTC.

Grownup interesting meeting.
It sounds sensible to wait a bit before TTC again, your body has been through a lot. [adopts school matronly demeanour]
That tea sounds a great - 'the worst thing you have ever tasted'. Surprised there is any left, it must be flying off the shelves with an advertising campaign like that.

Hi again.

Hi Rowing! Made me laugh about the tummy being too wobbly for acup. needles because I asked my lady the same thing ie. how can the needles get to the right spot if you've got spare tyres? She seemed to think it didn't matter. She doesn't do many in tum (coz she can't find mine ) as she says she doesn't want to interfere with what the drugs are doing. Good luck if you decide to go for it £30 per sesh mine.

Kiwi - love the sound of your pearly kings and curdled ears! What have I been doing? Erm. No holiday or nights out scheduled but I am going to see Take That at weekend - woo hoo! Hope you have a brill hol.

Hi tetley - good luck with the precision timing of "doing the do"!

Spiral - yeah tricky one. If it were me I'd stay schtum but it's amazing how other people operate isn't it?

Grown up - wow thanks for the free info! Will be thinking of you taking the foul tea on weds! I love the idea we're not officially passed it til 49 - hoo-ray!

xx

That's soooo intresting Grownup. Feel really tempted to give it a go myself now. May look around for a TCM practionere who specialises in fertility issues up here.

Keep us posted. I remember the teas - yes they are foul.